Home Invasion: Chapter 6
Title: Home Invasion: Chapter 6
Author: ficdirectory
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Characters JJ, Prentiss, Garcia, Hotch, Morgan, Reid, Rossi
Spoilers: N/A
Words: 9,657 - Chapter 6/11
Summary: The BAU is caught unaware on a night off, and find themselves victims of a home invasion.
This above all; to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare
Truth?
The truth is Garcia can't do anything without remembering the gun in her face. Without remembering another time. Another gun. A long recovery. Relearning everything.
The truth is, she is still slow to pick up on certain things. That has been hard enough to deal with and now there's this. This huge elephant weight of a thing pressing down on her. Crushing her. Stealing her light. Her heart. Herself. Taking it into some quiet darkness and abandoning it there, where it will never make a sound.
Sometimes, Garcia is afraid she will never find herself.
She sleeps a lot. Too much. She has nightmares and wakes with racing thoughts and crazy desires to call up her parents and talk to them. But that's ridiculous, because they aren't here and she is.
The truth is, Garcia was broken enough before - with losing her folks, with being depressed, dealing with death and horrible cases every day. With being shot, and recovering for so long that she literally forgot who she used to be before it happened. With someone breaking into her man's house on what should have been a fun night, and terrorizing them all until they can't breathe or think about anything else. Even now.
What does she regret the most?
Well, that's easy.
She regrets that, then or now, she didn't learn one damn thing. She regrets that after everything she's been through, she remains gullible enough - weak enough - to let a crazy person pull a gun on her for the second time in her life, and do exactly as she is told. Even though, now, she has it imprinted on her brain - what will happen if she listens - but she does it anyway.
So, she sleeps in her regrets and hopes that by some miracle, they go away while she isn't looking.
But they don't.
--
Truth.
She knows Hotch wants them back at work. He hasn't brought it up to her directly but Garcia knows it's true. She may be a little slower on the uptake of information these days, but it's clear to her that everyone is restless.
Morgan calls her every night.
He doesn't call her by name, or he just calls her Penelope, which means he is distancing himself from her, or trying to be all formal with her and that just won't work. If she can't trust her best friends - her coworkers - then who the hell can she trust?
"What's wrong with Garcia?" she asks quietly after he's done ranting about how he doesn't pay enough attention. If that's a sin, then they're all guilty.
"Hm?"
"You used to call me Garcia. Now it's Penelope or nothing. What's wrong with Garcia?"
"Nothing."
"What? Did I do something? Did you send me some kind of cosmic sign that night that I missed?!"
She is angry and he is here.
"Penelope? What are you talking about? What's going on with you?" He sounds so confused, but she just gets madder.
"You know what, Derek? Nothing!" She takes a steadying breath and speaks again. "Nothing's going on. I'm okay."
--
Lie.
She is okay.
Author: ficdirectory
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Characters JJ, Prentiss, Garcia, Hotch, Morgan, Reid, Rossi
Spoilers: N/A
Words: 9,657 - Chapter 6/11
Summary: The BAU is caught unaware on a night off, and find themselves victims of a home invasion.
This above all; to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare
Truth?
The truth is Garcia can't do anything without remembering the gun in her face. Without remembering another time. Another gun. A long recovery. Relearning everything.
The truth is, she is still slow to pick up on certain things. That has been hard enough to deal with and now there's this. This huge elephant weight of a thing pressing down on her. Crushing her. Stealing her light. Her heart. Herself. Taking it into some quiet darkness and abandoning it there, where it will never make a sound.
Sometimes, Garcia is afraid she will never find herself.
She sleeps a lot. Too much. She has nightmares and wakes with racing thoughts and crazy desires to call up her parents and talk to them. But that's ridiculous, because they aren't here and she is.
The truth is, Garcia was broken enough before - with losing her folks, with being depressed, dealing with death and horrible cases every day. With being shot, and recovering for so long that she literally forgot who she used to be before it happened. With someone breaking into her man's house on what should have been a fun night, and terrorizing them all until they can't breathe or think about anything else. Even now.
What does she regret the most?
Well, that's easy.
She regrets that, then or now, she didn't learn one damn thing. She regrets that after everything she's been through, she remains gullible enough - weak enough - to let a crazy person pull a gun on her for the second time in her life, and do exactly as she is told. Even though, now, she has it imprinted on her brain - what will happen if she listens - but she does it anyway.
So, she sleeps in her regrets and hopes that by some miracle, they go away while she isn't looking.
But they don't.
--
Truth.
She knows Hotch wants them back at work. He hasn't brought it up to her directly but Garcia knows it's true. She may be a little slower on the uptake of information these days, but it's clear to her that everyone is restless.
Morgan calls her every night.
He doesn't call her by name, or he just calls her Penelope, which means he is distancing himself from her, or trying to be all formal with her and that just won't work. If she can't trust her best friends - her coworkers - then who the hell can she trust?
"What's wrong with Garcia?" she asks quietly after he's done ranting about how he doesn't pay enough attention. If that's a sin, then they're all guilty.
"Hm?"
"You used to call me Garcia. Now it's Penelope or nothing. What's wrong with Garcia?"
"Nothing."
"What? Did I do something? Did you send me some kind of cosmic sign that night that I missed?!"
She is angry and he is here.
"Penelope? What are you talking about? What's going on with you?" He sounds so confused, but she just gets madder.
"You know what, Derek? Nothing!" She takes a steadying breath and speaks again. "Nothing's going on. I'm okay."
--
Lie.
She is okay.