(no subject)
Title: Gardening
Fandom: Star Trek, Alternate version of the Mirror Universe
Pairing: None directly referenced
Rating: PG-13 for goofy but dirty humour
Disclaimer: I don't own it. Parts belong to Paramount, TVOntario and SLWatson.
Notes: This is a Housewarming Fic of sorts for slwatson, who just moved and dealt with the stress that comes from that. It's based off of a picture that Steff drew as a joke.
Prompt: Garden
“Check out this cucumber!” Andy called out.
Scott didn't look over his shoulder. He had been long aware that Nance and Andy had fallen behind and giving them any attention would just encourage the behavior even more. Plus, with how far they had fallen back, the comment was intended for Nance. She was the only one remotely in reach.
Any more thought on this would be a waste of effort. Scott knelt down in soft earth, carefully weeding the untamed mess of vines and leaves. It wasn't for show; the weeds fought for the same nutrients as the vegetables, but could be picked, cleaned and used as simple greens in meals. Nothing went to waste. They couldn't afford to it.
The bright yellow dandelions were exactly what he was looking for and Scott sorted through the flowers. Animals and elements had gotten to some, leaving bruised leaves and bite marks, but the bulk of them where still in good shape and would make for decent filler for tonight's dinner.
Scott kept an ear open; the strange vehicle sounds in the distance had died down compared to what it had been the week before. Whoever was traveling through hadn't dared drive down the side streets. The trio had been left alone and Scott intended to keep it that way.
Andy and Nance were bickering about something judging from their pattern of speech, but it really didn't bother Scott. Years of practice listening to mechanical nosies taught him to block out their chatter to a faint din. He could hear them talk, but the exact words and phrases didn't last long enough in his head for Scott to grasp them and nothing they said really attracted his attention.
Aside from the dandelions, the vegetables were in good shape. Whatever animals had been visiting the garden must not have been large enough to tackle anything biggest than weeds; they had some damage, but the vegetables were untouched and the traps that laced the garden were unsprung. The later wasn't particularly good news, as it meant no meat tonight.
After the traps were tightened, Scott climbed back up to his feet, dusting off the dirt that caked to his knees. Business as usual, but neither Nance nor Andy had helped him this round. The two were still behind him and chattering.
Scott opened his mouth to make a rare comment about how much they had been slacking and probably attracting attention, only to stop dead as he saw the scene behind him.
“I'm telling you Nance, this is the typical size of a guy's dick,” Andy explained as he waved the cucumber in Nance's face.
The woman glared back with her arms folded. “I've seen my fair share of penises. With my years, it's probably a lot more than you have laid eyes on.”
“And probably all in medical textbooks,” Andy half-mumbled, although the comment and his grin was clear enough that he had to be intended for Nance to hear.
Nance bristled. “I'll have you know that a young lady is exposed to all sorts of vulgarity in the theater of war. The male member is just the tip of the iceberg!”
“Young? YOUNG?! Now who's the one making crap up? At least I have first hand experience with penises.”
It's wasn't until his eyebrow was slightly raised that Scott even realized that he had the slightest reaction to the inane conversation. That was the only word for it, in both of their cases. Shaking his head, he gathered up the dandelions and continued on his way.
Fandom: Star Trek, Alternate version of the Mirror Universe
Pairing: None directly referenced
Rating: PG-13 for goofy but dirty humour
Disclaimer: I don't own it. Parts belong to Paramount, TVOntario and SLWatson.
Notes: This is a Housewarming Fic of sorts for slwatson, who just moved and dealt with the stress that comes from that. It's based off of a picture that Steff drew as a joke.
Prompt: Garden
“Check out this cucumber!” Andy called out.
Scott didn't look over his shoulder. He had been long aware that Nance and Andy had fallen behind and giving them any attention would just encourage the behavior even more. Plus, with how far they had fallen back, the comment was intended for Nance. She was the only one remotely in reach.
Any more thought on this would be a waste of effort. Scott knelt down in soft earth, carefully weeding the untamed mess of vines and leaves. It wasn't for show; the weeds fought for the same nutrients as the vegetables, but could be picked, cleaned and used as simple greens in meals. Nothing went to waste. They couldn't afford to it.
The bright yellow dandelions were exactly what he was looking for and Scott sorted through the flowers. Animals and elements had gotten to some, leaving bruised leaves and bite marks, but the bulk of them where still in good shape and would make for decent filler for tonight's dinner.
Scott kept an ear open; the strange vehicle sounds in the distance had died down compared to what it had been the week before. Whoever was traveling through hadn't dared drive down the side streets. The trio had been left alone and Scott intended to keep it that way.
Andy and Nance were bickering about something judging from their pattern of speech, but it really didn't bother Scott. Years of practice listening to mechanical nosies taught him to block out their chatter to a faint din. He could hear them talk, but the exact words and phrases didn't last long enough in his head for Scott to grasp them and nothing they said really attracted his attention.
Aside from the dandelions, the vegetables were in good shape. Whatever animals had been visiting the garden must not have been large enough to tackle anything biggest than weeds; they had some damage, but the vegetables were untouched and the traps that laced the garden were unsprung. The later wasn't particularly good news, as it meant no meat tonight.
After the traps were tightened, Scott climbed back up to his feet, dusting off the dirt that caked to his knees. Business as usual, but neither Nance nor Andy had helped him this round. The two were still behind him and chattering.
Scott opened his mouth to make a rare comment about how much they had been slacking and probably attracting attention, only to stop dead as he saw the scene behind him.
“I'm telling you Nance, this is the typical size of a guy's dick,” Andy explained as he waved the cucumber in Nance's face.
The woman glared back with her arms folded. “I've seen my fair share of penises. With my years, it's probably a lot more than you have laid eyes on.”
“And probably all in medical textbooks,” Andy half-mumbled, although the comment and his grin was clear enough that he had to be intended for Nance to hear.
Nance bristled. “I'll have you know that a young lady is exposed to all sorts of vulgarity in the theater of war. The male member is just the tip of the iceberg!”
“Young? YOUNG?! Now who's the one making crap up? At least I have first hand experience with penises.”
It's wasn't until his eyebrow was slightly raised that Scott even realized that he had the slightest reaction to the inane conversation. That was the only word for it, in both of their cases. Shaking his head, he gathered up the dandelions and continued on his way.