This is mostly dialogue, but I hope you like this. *worries*
SoundIt's the sound of familar laughter that makes Chris look up from the menu and glance around the restaurant. It doesn't take him long to spot the source, or rather sources. He slumps down further in his booth and puts the menu back up in front of his face, effectively hiding himself from being seen or from seeing. Or rather, it'd be effective if the person sitting across the table from him would stop flicking the menu
( ... )
Sound (continued)ravenbatMarch 13 2006, 13:42:40 UTC
The waitress appears with their order and places it on the table before leaving them alone again. Chris has his mouth full of food when someone else approaches the table. He looks up, fully expecting it to be a fan. He's taken aback when it isn't. Instead he finds himself looking into a pair of angry brown eyes.
"Aaron."
The younger man doesn't say anything for a few minutes. "I wondered what made Nick quit laughing. I wondered who he could have possibly seen that caused him to walk out of here and leave me sitting at the table by myself. Then as I was paying the check, I spotted you." The fact that Aaron nearly spits the word you isn't lost on Chris, he'd always known that if something ever happened between him and Nick, that Aaron would naturally take his brother's side
( ... )
Re: Sound (continued)turps33March 13 2006, 14:38:51 UTC
Raven. I love you so much right now.
I've just been up to take Brock out, he peed on me again, it's sleeting like crazy so I was freezing and wet, but you made me smile. For that I thank you.
This was lovely, and you're a star for tailoring it into something I'd like. JC and Chris eating together fills me with glee, and JC kicked him, with flipflops on *g*
There's no need to worry about the dialogue, I thought it was great. I could just see them bickering, and Chris sulking *g*
"And quite well, thank you." JC replies with a wink
Love that line!
I really liked Aaron defending his brother like that, almost as much as I liked Nick's sneaky plan. Though even that's eclipsed by this.
He runs a finger along the shake that still clings to Chris' neck then sticks his finger in his mouth, sucks it clean before removing his finger with an audible pop.
Oh my guh! I love those boys so much. I love this story so much.
Re: Sound (continued)ravenbatMarch 13 2006, 23:16:56 UTC
I am so happy that you liked it. :) I know that a lot of people don't like stories that are mostly dialogue, so whenever I have a story go in that direction, I worry all the more. This just felt "right" for dialogue. In my mind I could picture JC and Chris sitting across from each other. I could see Chris being all sulky and trying to squish down in the seat and use the menu to hide. I could see JC being amused by Chris and still annoyed at him. I also can see JC being rather cocky about his "skills" and my first draft I had him saying that "quite well, thank you." and then following up with some comment about "do you want references?" or something like "Just ask Lance." But in the end, I decided to just stay with the one line
( ... )
Comments 6
SoundIt's the sound of familar laughter that makes Chris look up from the menu and glance around the restaurant. It doesn't take him long to spot the source, or rather sources. He slumps down further in his booth and puts the menu back up in front of his face, effectively hiding himself from being seen or from seeing. Or rather, it'd be effective if the person sitting across the table from him would stop flicking the menu ( ... )
Reply
"Aaron."
The younger man doesn't say anything for a few minutes. "I wondered what made Nick quit laughing. I wondered who he could have possibly seen that caused him to walk out of here and leave me sitting at the table by myself. Then as I was paying the check, I spotted you." The fact that Aaron nearly spits the word you isn't lost on Chris, he'd always known that if something ever happened between him and Nick, that Aaron would naturally take his brother's side ( ... )
Reply
I've just been up to take Brock out, he peed on me again, it's sleeting like crazy so I was freezing and wet, but you made me smile. For that I thank you.
This was lovely, and you're a star for tailoring it into something I'd like. JC and Chris eating together fills me with glee, and JC kicked him, with flipflops on *g*
There's no need to worry about the dialogue, I thought it was great. I could just see them bickering, and Chris sulking *g*
"And quite well, thank you." JC replies with a wink
Love that line!
I really liked Aaron defending his brother like that, almost as much as I liked Nick's sneaky plan. Though even that's eclipsed by this.
He runs a finger along the shake that still clings to Chris' neck then sticks his finger in his mouth, sucks it clean before removing his finger with an audible pop.
Oh my guh! I love those boys so much. I love this story so much.
Thank you. *hugs you tight*
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