Accidents Happen (on purpose)
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Not long after, I’m back at the hospital. I open Jared’s door carefully, and step in. He smiles at me, damn that smile, I can’t help but return it, there’s no way that what that man said on the phone’s true.
I’ll never believe it. I hate myself for even thinking it might be true. I’ll never doubt him again. I’m relieved as I come to that conclusion, and on an impulse, I pull Jared in for a hug.
He freezes in surprise, but after a few seconds, he places his hands on my back, and returns the embrace. He whispers in my ear, “Are you okay Jen?”
I nod and mumble, “I’m sorry.”
He pushes me away so he can see my face, “For what?”
I blink, “For doubting you for a second.”
Confusion clouds his features, “What are you talking about Jen?”
I decide to tell him everything. I press my face into his shoulder, “Someone phoned, they said you were a killer, I didn’t believe them; then they began to describe you. Jay, they described your smile, your dimples, your laugh, everything.”
I shudder, “It was how I would describe you, and that scared me. They said you were putting on an act; that you had fooled me. That it was all a lie.”
I break off, tears dampening Jared’s shoulder, “I doubted you, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” is all I can say as Jared rocks me soothingly.
“What made you change your mind?” he asks in a strange voice.
“You did.” I say simply.
He sits up suddenly, “Jen, I want you to believe me, I never killed anyone. I was supposed to, but I didn’t, someone else did, and they framed me.”
I pull back to look at him, “What are you talking about?”
He sighs, stares out the window for a long moment, and then says, “I’ll start from the beginning. I was born in a prison cell in the middle of Poland, my mother died a few hours after my birth. I was raised by the prison guard, an old man called ‘Kanin’ who took pity on me and took me to his shithole of a home, he fed me, beat me, made me work for him as a thief. One day I picked the wrong pocket. I was eight. I was an expert at picking pockets, but this person was…he was part of the Polish Secret Service.
"He caught me, and dragged me to his house. He trained me in many fighting styles; he was cruel, and harsh. I knew him only as master. By the time I was fifteen, I had graduated to being an expert in the fighting world. I could fade into corners like shadows. No one ever knew when I was in the room unless I wanted them to. I could fight off grown men easily. But I hated it. I hated having the ability to hurt someone, and when I told my master this, he beat me until I couldn’t even try and stand up.
"Once my body had healed enough, he gave me my first job. I was paired with another boy; his name was David. I had no name so they called me Shadow. We had to kill a big-shot businessman who had pissed off the wrong people. It was all set up, but I couldn’t do it. Dave covered for me; he threw the knife and told our master I had done it.
"Somehow the master knew we were lying so he asked us to bring him a video of me killing the next target. Dave was like a big brother to me, he had a friend who was good with computers, so what happened was that the man was sitting tied up, and I threw a knife at him, obviously missing on purpose, and then a few seconds later Dave threw the knife that killed the man. Dave’s friend cut out Dave’s part, so it looked like I had thrown the killing knife. We gave this to my master, and he was obviously thrilled. I was given my first overseas contract, in Dallas, Texas.
"My job was to kill a Mr.Padalecki. It was my first job alone. I had full intentions of fulfilling the contract, but after watching their family for a few days, I couldn’t do it. They were everything I wasn’t, everything I wanted to have. I knew that even if I didn’t kill Mr.Padalecki, someone else from the guild would, and they would also kill me so I did the only thing I could think of: I told them the truth.
"At first they didn’t believe me, I mean, if a ragged, muscled, half-starved teenager showed up on your door telling you that a guild in Poland has a hit out on you, you would be a bit freaked, so they slammed the door in my face.
"I hung around, watching for the replacement assassin. On the second day one arrived, I fought him off. They kept coming, but I fought them all off.
"The family grew to trust me, and I had grown fond of them, so I fought with my life each time. There is an unwritten code in the guild law. It is this: if the target defeats all the lesser assassins, the master himself must fight him, if the target comes out victorious, then he is free.
"Not once in history was this ever done, but I did it. All my anger and hate at what he had made me do, what he had done to people, what he had done to me, all fuelled my strength and my mind.
"I was soaked in blood, but I was standing, he was soaked in blood, but he was crawling. He admitted defeat, and gave me his word of honour that the Padalecki’s would not be harmed.
"After that, I was lost. I didn’t know where to go, so the Padalecki's accepted me into their family. They gave me a name, Jared Padalecki, and for the first time I felt loved. I tried to leave the guild behind me, but it found me again years later.
"I was a fast learner, so I caught up with school easily. I wanted to become an actor, so when I finished school, I left for Hollywood. I got a part in the House of Wax, and that’s when I met Chad, Chad Michael Murray. He was great; he quickly became my best friend. He really cared about me, and I think he even grew to love me.
"I didn’t tell him about my past, because it was just that: my past. It was over and I never wanted to have anything to do with it again, but Chad had a hit on him, he had slept with the wrong man’s wife.
"We were having a few beers, when I saw them out the window.
"I saved Chad like I had saved my family, but he was scared of me, before the master admitted defeat, he had, in a last cruel attempt to destroy my life, shown Chad the video of me supposedly killing the man.
"Chad had seen me fighting, and he had seen what I was capable of. I tried to tell him everything, but he turned away from me. After the filming was over, Chad said he never wanted to see me again, and I respected his wishes, no matter how heartbroken I was.
"I had really loved him. I acted in a few more movies, met Sandy, she wanted me, and I didn’t really have anything I wanted, so I agreed to be her man.
"Then... I met you. You accepted me right from the beginning. And I loved you for that. I loved making you smile, and for some reason you always managed to cheer me up. I…I just loved you from the start.
"My guess is that my master is dying, and he tried to kill me again. He will try again soon, but because this is a personal fight, he is avoiding being seen by any other people. You probably saved my life by sleeping at the hospital with me, but he will try again soon.
"That phone call you received, it sounds like it was Chad. My master probably contacted him, and suggested he warn you.
"The way he described me - well that was probably because I think he loved me once.” Jared sighs, and I’m jolted back to reality, I had been so lost in his story, that I had lost track of time.
I wait for it all to sink in, it doesn’t. There’s just a loud buzzing noise going on my head. The buzz is accompanied by an echo of, “He’s not the person you think he is.”
Suddenly a wave of anger fills me. What the fuck? I mean seriously, what the fuck? An assassin? Jared? He expects me to believe that? How stupid does he think I am? Who the fuck lies to their best friend like that?
Scrambling to my feet and backing away towards the door, I shut my eyes to the heartbroken look on Jared’s face and race out the door, crashing into one of the officers on their way in. I don’t spare a glance at him, just shoved my way past and sprint down the corridor, tears blurring my view.
I run until I’ve left the hospital behind me.
“I’ll never doubt him again.” My own promise suddenly stops me in my tracks.
“All I’m saying, is…please don’t leave him, whatever happens.” Donna’s words hit me like a sledgehammer. I feel my legs give out, and I’m suddenly on the ground.
It can’t be true. I mean seriously that shit’s just in the movies. There aren’t really guilds or ninja or whatever the hell Jared was saying he was. That stuff doesn’t exist. It’s not real. I mean, this is America for fuck’s sake. We live in the 21st Century. If there are any ninja’s then there are four of them. They’re green, and they have shells on their backs. And they’re on a kids show called the Ninja Turtles. But that’s it. End of story. No ninja’s.
A swirling image of Jared’s face, his eyes wide with hurt, as he watched me run away from him, fills my mind. A wave of nausea hits me.
But it’s Jared. He’s never lied to me before. Why would he make something like this up?
Okay, let’s say it is true. Jared was an assassin. His parent’s aren’t his real ones. He’s being chased by a guild master who wants his blood. Chad loved him once. He loved Chad once.
I try to ignore the stab of jealousy at that last thought. It doesn’t work. Just the thought of Jared loving another guy makes my mouth taste sour.
But Chad ditched Jared. I think smugly.
My stomach lurches. So have I.
I find myself scrambling to my feet and racing back towards the hospital. Cursing myself for being like Chad, sure it would take a while for me to get used to the concept of Jared - big, goofy, smiling Jared - being an ex-assassin, but Jared is still Jared; my best friend, who I love, and who I should’ve given the benefit of the doubt.
I just hope it’s not too late. That thought makes my legs move faster, and moments later I am outside Jared’s door.
I peer through the small glass window, and my stomach drops further. There’s a man. A tall man with a black moustache, dressed in all black. As he turns his head slightly, I can make out a tattoo with strange text on it.
“Go ahead; just get it over with. I’ve got nothing left,” Jared’s defeated voice breaks through my daze, and I shove open the door, making them both spin. The man takes one look at me, and takes a running leap, flying straight through the open window.
I run over, and glance down at the pavement outside. The man’s already gone. I turn back to Jared, guilt and self-disgust filling me.
“Jay…” I murmur.
His eyes are fixed on the bed-spread before him, drops of liquid falling onto it, leaving damp patches on the pristine white material. My heart tightens, and a moment later I am wrapping my arms around his tense shoulders.
“Jay, Jay, Jay,” I breathe, rocking us slowly, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I should have believed you. I doubted you again. God, what kind of a friend am I?”
He looks up at me through watery eyes, “You came back?” he says wonderingly.
“I should never have left.”
He smiles slightly, painfully, “You shouldn’t have come back, he saw you, he knows what you look like, and he knows how much I love you.”
I feel a sudden jolt of happiness at his words, “You love me? Still, even after I doubted you like that?”
Jared smiles like I’m a stupid kid, “You did what anyone else would have done. But you came back. And of course I love you, more than anyone else.”
His smile disappears, “And that is probably why you should run away as fast as you can. I’ve endangered you, my master knows you now.”
I pull Jared back into a tight hug, trying to convey how much I loved him and how grateful I am that he’s given me another chance, as I whisper in his ear, “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere, you don’t have to be alone anymore, I’m here and I love you so much it hurts.”
I feel Jared go limp in my arms, and sobs wrack through his body, all those years of being alone must have come rushing back to him, and he clings onto me like he’s a child. I rock him softly, running my fingers through his hair, just holding him.
About ten minutes later, Jared stops sobbing, and reluctantly lets go of me. I decide it’s time we were leaving, so I buzz the nurse, and not long after, we’re seated in my car on the way to my house. One of my favourite songs begins playing. I’ve lost count of the times I had sung this song after seeing Jared and Sandy, ‘I’m barely holding on' by Lifehouse.
I softly sing along, causing Jared to smile at me, and that’s so worth the embarrassment of singing. When we reach my house, I help Jared inside, and we walk into the living room, only to find ourselves face to face with the man. The guild master.
His skin is yellowish and mottled, like that of a decaying corpse. He sneers at us, and I immediately stand in front of Jared, shielding him, “You stay the fuck away from him.” I threaten. The man laughs, “Or what? You’ll laugh me to death, pretty boy?”
Now I may not be a trained assassin, but I’ve seen my share of fights, and I play dirty.
I’ve got a wooden floor, and the man’s standing on the runner, so I quickly yank it, causing him to leap backwards, I run forward to fight, but Jared pulls me back, “Jensen, no, you can’t fight him, he’ll kill you.”
I tug away from him, calling over my shoulder, “And I’m supposed to just let you fight him, three days after you were stabbed, right?”
I grab a vase and chuck it at the master, he dodges it easily, and charges at me, I pick up a chair angling the legs so he runs into them, but he just leaps aside, I chuck the chair at him, but he just catches it.
He ducks, and swipes my legs out from beneath me. As he comes at me, I realise with an, ‘Oh, crap’, that this is a guild master.
Just as I am sure I’m about to meet my maker, Jared blocks the blow that would have killed me, and twists the master’s arm into a painful position. The tattooed man breaks the hold with trained ease, and attacks in a fast succession of blows, moving so fast that my eyes strain to distinguish between them.
Jared is meeting each of the blows with just as much speed. But I can see that his wound is hindering his movements. He’s shielding his chest too much for any proper attack. He’s trapped in defensive moves and tiring quickly.
I scramble to my feet, barely getting out the way of a wide round-house kick that hits its mark on the master’s side, the master momentarily distracted by my movement.
Trying to will down the panic, I manage to regain enough sense to race towards my safe, twirl the dial, and swing the small door open. I reach inside and grasp the cold metal.
I whirl around, holding the gun steady - thanks to years of working with props - and watch the ongoing fight, waiting for an opportunity.
Jared realises what I’m holding, and - his eyes widening slightly - he tries to angle himself out of the way. The guild master knows what’s going on, and ensures that he’s shielded by Jared throughout the grappling.
Suddenly Jared gets a blow to his side, and falls to the ground. I realise that he took a hit for me to get the shot, so I hold in my concern long enough to shoot the master - who was standing triumphantly over Jared - in the shoulder, sending him tumbling backwards.
I kick the guild master in his side as forcefully as I can manage, sending him skidding backwards into the cellar. I quickly pull the door shut, and lock it. Jared stares at me in shock, I’m panting, and my back’s sore, but I grin down at him.
“Now we can call the cops. Do you think they’ll believe we just fought an assassin master?” I ask with a gleam in my eye.
Jared grins back, and with a pained chuckle says, “Well, I did try to tell them who was after me, but they didn’t believe me either, so this’ll come as a shock.”
I swallow the rising guilt at the ‘didn’t believe me either’, part, and I kneel, “You okay?”
Jared nods his head, “I will be. Wow, dude, you got him good.”
I allow myself a moment of pride, knowing that I can protect Jared, and I completely ignore the fact that the man was a dying master and that I’d had a gun. How I did it is irrelevant. I still beat the master.
I call the cops and they arrive shortly. Jared glares at them with an ‘I told you so’ face, and they drive off , baffled, with the master manacled in the back.
Once they had driven off, Jared and I go inside and collapse on my couch.
I grin at him, “Not bad, huh?”
He smiles at me, and it’s his special smile, that he uses only for me, with trust, honesty and love in his eyes, and his face glowing.
Amazement fills me that he can even look at me like that, after I’d practically accused him of lying.
Jared just leans closer, “I’m just glad you didn’t get hurt.”
And he wraps his arms around my ribcage and buries his face in my chest. He really seems like a small child. I hold him close to me, thinking how much I love him, when he suddenly looks up, his face is nervous.
“Jen, promise you won’t hit me?”
I laugh, “Jay, you were stabbed, and you’ve just been in a fight with a guild master, there’s very little you could do to make me hit you.”
He still looks nervous, “Promise?”
I nod wondering what the hell he’s about to do that could be so bad, “Okay fine, I promise.”
He grins and jumps on me, straddling my hips.
“Jay? What are you doing?” I ask nervously.
He smiles, “You promised,” and then he slowly lays his body down on mine, so he’s flush against me, chest to chest, legs entwined. His hands are on either side of my face, holding him up. My hands have somehow made their way to Jared’s hip bones.
Looking me straight in the eyes, he lowers his head, and lays his lips gently on mine. It’s a simple kiss, chaste, but it’s filled with so much emotion that it sends sparks through my body.
He lifts his head, and still not breaking eye-contact, he says, “I love you Jen, as a friend, as a brother, and in this way as well. There’s no one else. It’s always been you.”
I smile up at him, “I love you too Jay, but you seriously weigh a ton.”
He begins to roll off, but I stop him, “I like it, it feels real,” and I pull him closer, lifting a hand to wrap in his hair, guiding him down for another kiss.
It starts out gentle and tender, but becomes more urgent and heated as we each try to taste the other.
I pull away to look at him, saying, “I’ve never kissed a guy before, it tastes different, not as sickly sweet as a girl.”
He smiles, "I kissed a guy once before, it was Chad.”
I stiffen, and he obviously notices, “Jen, don’t worry, I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and he tasted of old beer and rubber, you taste of mint, apples, candy, and peanuts. You’re way tastier.”
It feels weird being called tastier than Chad Michael Murray, but I decide to let it go, and once again bring Jared’s mouth down against mine, my hands leaves his hip bones, and begin to explore his back, gently brushing over the delicate tissue, then I stick my hands in his back pockets, and claim him, pulling away from his mouth, and growling, “Mine,” in his ear.
He chuckles, “Possessive much?”
I growl again, "Totally."
END