Dir en grey / Kaoru x Toshiya / Razzle Dazzle
Title: Razzle Dazzle
Author: bl4ckm4lice
Fandom: Dir en grey
Claim: Kaoru Niikura x Toshimasa Hara
Prompt: Richard Gere (Chicago movie) - Razzle Dazzle
Word Count: 1182
Rating: FRT
Disclaimer: na-ah, not mine
Author's Notes: Made for fic_cd_mix challenge.
Link to table: here
“Kyo, what to do?”
No way, no. Why me? “Erm, don’t you have Die to be asked those kinds of questions?”
Kaoru ignores me, since that’s a pretty rhetorical question anyway. Die is in his hometown right now, and Kaoru hates to talk about certain things through the phone. One of those certain things is Toshiya. And oh how sure I am that Kaoru is currently talking about Toshiya, seeing from his expression.
“I mean, I can’t believe I ruined it. That perfect, beautiful moment. I ruined it!”
Is there any way to escape? I don’t really want to talk about their love life, more less to be consulted about it. It’s enough that Toshiya sometimes whined at me whenever no one else is around to receive his whining. Do I really have to tolerate Kaoru too?
“He’s angry now. Well, not angry but upset. That’s even worse. He’s disappointed in me, and whatever I say can never undo my little mistake.”
If I stay silent until someone comes, will I be saved? But when exactly will someone comes? It’s so early and I curse myself for actually woke up early today. Of all day.
“Kyo, did Toshiya say anything to you?”
”Huh? No… he didn’t say anything.” Damn, my mouth just moves reflexively. Now I must continue to reply to him. He appears thoughtful and I know that he’s going to tell me everything.
“You see… last night at my place, after we made love-.”
“HEY! If you’re going to talk about your sex life, I’m outta here.”
Kaoru seems taken aback, but quickly says, “No, it was just an intro.”
“Intro!? What, are you playing a song? Skip it!”
“Oh well, so we cuddled and I could see he pondered about something. I asked him and he hesitated at first. But not long after that, he asked to me with a really soft voice while avoiding my gaze, ‘Kaoru, I was thinking… What do you think if I move into your place?’”
Geez, I feel like punching Kaoru’s lovesick face. “And so the problem is…”
Suddenly, he groans and thumped his head to the table, hard enough to make my coffee cup shakes.
“Hey! Watch it, if I don’t have my coffee, I might fall asleep in the middle of your story.”
Again, he ignores me, “I hesitated! I fucking hesitated! Oh, how could I-He was the one who asked and I couldn’t say a thing!” He thumps his head again, continuing his self-hating moment. “Toshiya, oh, he was upset when I didn’t answer. His face was red, embarrassed. I knew right away that I had made a mistake.”
My poor coffee got spilled a little. I pick the cup up before I lose more. It would probably be better if I start drinking it now. I’ll buy another when the recording starts. Oh why does it have to be mine and Kaoru’s turn today?
“He then quickly said ‘oh forget it’ before hurrying to put his clothes back on. He didn’t even throw a tantrum like usual, he was all silent and sour. He wouldn’t listen to me, he was so… upset. Of course he was. He went back home after that and didn’t answer my calls.”
Much to my displeasure, I know that the only way I can be done with this is to fix the situation. Oh hell. “So why did you hesitate?”
Kaoru blinks, “Huh?”
“You actually don’t want to live with him?” I’m surprised. Kaoru hesitated?
“Wha-OF COURSE I WANT TO!”
“Don’t shout, will you!?” I’m running out of patience here. Trust Kaoru and Toshiya to get on my nerves when they’re fighting. Always small, unimportant matters.
Kaoru shuts his mouth, looking embarrassed. “Of course I want to live with him.”
I click my tongue, “But there are reasons?”
“One huge important reason.”
I seriously doubt its importance. “Like?”
“I’m afraid he’ll hate me if he knows how I am at home.”
Blink. “…I’m sure he had been to your home a lot…”
“No, I mean…” He scratches his head, “I mean… I can’t possibly keep up my perfect image all the time. I’d surely slip.”
Now I’m speechless.
“And with Toshiya around 24 hours a day, he’d find out that I might not be what he thought I am.”
“Wait, you mean all this time you’ve been… keeping up your image?”
“That’s what I’ve been saying.” He glowers in annoyance.
“But… why?”
“Why? WHY? What will you do if you fall in love with someone so out of your league? I’ve been trying really hard to impress him, you know. I play the role of a perfect lover. Perfect man. Dependable, loving, clean and knows how to cook. And now I can’t tell him why I hesitated, because that means everything will be meaningless.”
Ok, this is plainly stupid. A big bullshit. And now I’m gonna have to tell him the obvious because this stupid leader is a mess when it comes to Toshiya. Argh, why does it have to be me?
“Maybe you two should just break up.”
Kaoru glares so quickly and fiercely at me, but I continue before he got the chance to yell, “If your relationship is wrapped in a lie, it’s meaningless.”
“It’s not a lie,” Kaoru says defensively, “I just never showed him my imperfect side. Seriously, why should I even show him? That I love to drink beer late at night and burp in front of the TV, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers? That I made a lot of mess to practice cooking for Toshiya? That I often read a lot about his current favorite anime so that we can talk about it? That I only clean up when he comes? Come on!”
See? A big bullshit indeed. “And you think he couldn’t see through your razzle dazzle all this time?”
“Of cour-Wait, what are you implying?” Kaoru turns pale.
Explaining things is not my thing. It’s too bothersome. I simply let my words soak in the dull leader. He might guess that I’m just saying it randomly, or he might find out that Toshiya actually talked to me about it.
More than once, in the times Toshiya come to me, he talked about the things Kaoru was so afraid to be found out. Sometimes Toshiya whined, sometimes he was amused. Some other times, though, he was simply touched. For that little romance fan, knowing that someone went that far for him is just what he wanted.
So their current bickering is yet another one tiny matter turns bad by misunderstandings and insecurities.
“But no, he didn’t realize that was your reason for hesitation. And now he thinks that you find him a bother. Great job, Kaoru.”
He looks guiltier for a second, but then he realizes something. “You said Toshiya didn’t say anything!”
“I lied. I’m Kyo, remember?”
He throws me a look of hate. “Asshole!”
This is what I get from socializing with the two. Whines, curses, more whines and more curses. There are no thanks in this business.
***
The end~
Author: bl4ckm4lice
Fandom: Dir en grey
Claim: Kaoru Niikura x Toshimasa Hara
Prompt: Richard Gere (Chicago movie) - Razzle Dazzle
Word Count: 1182
Rating: FRT
Disclaimer: na-ah, not mine
Author's Notes: Made for fic_cd_mix challenge.
Link to table: here
“Kyo, what to do?”
No way, no. Why me? “Erm, don’t you have Die to be asked those kinds of questions?”
Kaoru ignores me, since that’s a pretty rhetorical question anyway. Die is in his hometown right now, and Kaoru hates to talk about certain things through the phone. One of those certain things is Toshiya. And oh how sure I am that Kaoru is currently talking about Toshiya, seeing from his expression.
“I mean, I can’t believe I ruined it. That perfect, beautiful moment. I ruined it!”
Is there any way to escape? I don’t really want to talk about their love life, more less to be consulted about it. It’s enough that Toshiya sometimes whined at me whenever no one else is around to receive his whining. Do I really have to tolerate Kaoru too?
“He’s angry now. Well, not angry but upset. That’s even worse. He’s disappointed in me, and whatever I say can never undo my little mistake.”
If I stay silent until someone comes, will I be saved? But when exactly will someone comes? It’s so early and I curse myself for actually woke up early today. Of all day.
“Kyo, did Toshiya say anything to you?”
”Huh? No… he didn’t say anything.” Damn, my mouth just moves reflexively. Now I must continue to reply to him. He appears thoughtful and I know that he’s going to tell me everything.
“You see… last night at my place, after we made love-.”
“HEY! If you’re going to talk about your sex life, I’m outta here.”
Kaoru seems taken aback, but quickly says, “No, it was just an intro.”
“Intro!? What, are you playing a song? Skip it!”
“Oh well, so we cuddled and I could see he pondered about something. I asked him and he hesitated at first. But not long after that, he asked to me with a really soft voice while avoiding my gaze, ‘Kaoru, I was thinking… What do you think if I move into your place?’”
Geez, I feel like punching Kaoru’s lovesick face. “And so the problem is…”
Suddenly, he groans and thumped his head to the table, hard enough to make my coffee cup shakes.
“Hey! Watch it, if I don’t have my coffee, I might fall asleep in the middle of your story.”
Again, he ignores me, “I hesitated! I fucking hesitated! Oh, how could I-He was the one who asked and I couldn’t say a thing!” He thumps his head again, continuing his self-hating moment. “Toshiya, oh, he was upset when I didn’t answer. His face was red, embarrassed. I knew right away that I had made a mistake.”
My poor coffee got spilled a little. I pick the cup up before I lose more. It would probably be better if I start drinking it now. I’ll buy another when the recording starts. Oh why does it have to be mine and Kaoru’s turn today?
“He then quickly said ‘oh forget it’ before hurrying to put his clothes back on. He didn’t even throw a tantrum like usual, he was all silent and sour. He wouldn’t listen to me, he was so… upset. Of course he was. He went back home after that and didn’t answer my calls.”
Much to my displeasure, I know that the only way I can be done with this is to fix the situation. Oh hell. “So why did you hesitate?”
Kaoru blinks, “Huh?”
“You actually don’t want to live with him?” I’m surprised. Kaoru hesitated?
“Wha-OF COURSE I WANT TO!”
“Don’t shout, will you!?” I’m running out of patience here. Trust Kaoru and Toshiya to get on my nerves when they’re fighting. Always small, unimportant matters.
Kaoru shuts his mouth, looking embarrassed. “Of course I want to live with him.”
I click my tongue, “But there are reasons?”
“One huge important reason.”
I seriously doubt its importance. “Like?”
“I’m afraid he’ll hate me if he knows how I am at home.”
Blink. “…I’m sure he had been to your home a lot…”
“No, I mean…” He scratches his head, “I mean… I can’t possibly keep up my perfect image all the time. I’d surely slip.”
Now I’m speechless.
“And with Toshiya around 24 hours a day, he’d find out that I might not be what he thought I am.”
“Wait, you mean all this time you’ve been… keeping up your image?”
“That’s what I’ve been saying.” He glowers in annoyance.
“But… why?”
“Why? WHY? What will you do if you fall in love with someone so out of your league? I’ve been trying really hard to impress him, you know. I play the role of a perfect lover. Perfect man. Dependable, loving, clean and knows how to cook. And now I can’t tell him why I hesitated, because that means everything will be meaningless.”
Ok, this is plainly stupid. A big bullshit. And now I’m gonna have to tell him the obvious because this stupid leader is a mess when it comes to Toshiya. Argh, why does it have to be me?
“Maybe you two should just break up.”
Kaoru glares so quickly and fiercely at me, but I continue before he got the chance to yell, “If your relationship is wrapped in a lie, it’s meaningless.”
“It’s not a lie,” Kaoru says defensively, “I just never showed him my imperfect side. Seriously, why should I even show him? That I love to drink beer late at night and burp in front of the TV, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers? That I made a lot of mess to practice cooking for Toshiya? That I often read a lot about his current favorite anime so that we can talk about it? That I only clean up when he comes? Come on!”
See? A big bullshit indeed. “And you think he couldn’t see through your razzle dazzle all this time?”
“Of cour-Wait, what are you implying?” Kaoru turns pale.
Explaining things is not my thing. It’s too bothersome. I simply let my words soak in the dull leader. He might guess that I’m just saying it randomly, or he might find out that Toshiya actually talked to me about it.
More than once, in the times Toshiya come to me, he talked about the things Kaoru was so afraid to be found out. Sometimes Toshiya whined, sometimes he was amused. Some other times, though, he was simply touched. For that little romance fan, knowing that someone went that far for him is just what he wanted.
So their current bickering is yet another one tiny matter turns bad by misunderstandings and insecurities.
“But no, he didn’t realize that was your reason for hesitation. And now he thinks that you find him a bother. Great job, Kaoru.”
He looks guiltier for a second, but then he realizes something. “You said Toshiya didn’t say anything!”
“I lied. I’m Kyo, remember?”
He throws me a look of hate. “Asshole!”
This is what I get from socializing with the two. Whines, curses, more whines and more curses. There are no thanks in this business.
***
The end~