THE FANDOM HIGHTIMES: VOLUME 3, 14th EDITION!
PETER SPEAKS:
Please allow me a moment to acknowledge that we had some nutty crap going on last week and Fandom once again banded together to make everything right.
Okay, moving on. Sorry, but that's old news by now. The new news is that our internal organs are rising up against us. Esophaguses are refusing to swallow food. Knees are refusing to bend. Spleens are refusing to hold reservoirs of blood, allowing it to just go forth without having old red blood cells destroyed.
Or possibly I was distracted this weekend and didn't get an opportunity to figure out what I was writing my editorial about today so I'm making stuff up just in case it comes true. I guess we'll find out one way or another.
SENIORITIS: AN INVESTIGATIVE EVENT IN SEVEN PARTS
PART VI: NOT FOLLOWING THROUGH ON PROMISES
by Peter Parker
A key part of Senioritis is that you say you're going to do something and then completely fail to do it. For example, ending this series last week. I apologize to all who were expecting this insanity to be done with, but really, you should have seen this coming.
Next week: Part VII!
LEARN TO SPEAK AL BHED
By Rikku
Hi and welcome back to another week of Learn to Speak Al Bhed! It's been a pretty eventful week so I'm just gonna get right to this week's sentences, okay?
Angel statues are ugly and tacky and very, very mean.
Yhkam cdydiac yna ikmo yht dylgo yht jano, jano sayh.
It is incredibly hard to not blink when that is the one thing you are not supposed to do!
Ed ec ehlnatepmo rynt du hud pmehg frah dryd ec dra uha drehk oui yna hud cibbucat du tu!
We are so very glad to have all of you back.
Fa yna cu jano kmyt du ryja ymm uv oui pylg.
It is somewhat strange to have everything go back to normal after a crisis.
Ed ec cusafryd cdnyhka du ryja ajanodrehk ku pylg du hunsym yvdan y lnecec.
I hope I do not have nightmares about marble claws and fangs!
E ruba E tu hud ryja hekrdsynac ypuid synpma lmyfc yht vyhkc!
That's it for this week - sorry they're all kinda about the angel stuff!! I couldn't think of anything else for right now. Kinda major, you know?? Okay, so, if you have any requests, then tell me and I'll put them in for next time! Caa oui haqd faag! (See you next week!)
JUMBLE
Unscramble the mystery words, then use the special CIRCLED letters to answer this week's brainbusting riddle!
FLUOTDIE
O _ _ _ _ _ _ _
SETNSIUMAH
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ O _
MTESEE
_ O _ _ _ _
RIWORRA
_ _ _ _ _ O _
TOCPEELIHR
O _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
What do flies wear on their feet? OOOOO!
Last week's answers: CHANGE, COPPER, RECEIPT, FLAME, BUNT
What's the only bird that can get a job at a construction site? A CRANE!
The Fine Print
By Peter Parker
The Jumble's harder to make up for the shorter paper. I'm just trying to give back to the community.
Coffee Pin-Up
credits:
editor: Peter Parker
words: Peter Parker, Rikku
pictures: The fabulous Chloe Sullivan, the amazing Rory Gilmore, the modest Peter Parker
adviser: Steve Rogers
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Send a letter to the editor: letters.fhightimes@fandomhigh.edu