V-Day sucks
Things only got worse after my last entry. We got back together, I was a better person than I ever have been.
I was head over heals in love.
But nothing I could do or say was ever good enough to get what I really needed, which is to have those feelings returned. When I went out to LA, things just all went to Hell. They got even worse when I got back last week.
I have honestly never felt so used and hurt in all my life. She was everything to me, my whole world. Now seeing that so much of everything was a lie, I just want to crawl into a hole and never come out. I'm emotionally spent, there are no more tears left to cry right now. There is just this huge void and sick feeling in my stomach 24/7. I'm not eating, I can barely sleep.
I try to move on, but I don't have the slightest feeling towards anyone. I pretty much had to tell someone to get out of my house the other day because just having a girl here made me want to puke. I was honestly a hair away from getting physically ill.
God, please help me. I'm not dealing, I'm not wanting to go on like this.
Please...
I was head over heals in love.
But nothing I could do or say was ever good enough to get what I really needed, which is to have those feelings returned. When I went out to LA, things just all went to Hell. They got even worse when I got back last week.
I have honestly never felt so used and hurt in all my life. She was everything to me, my whole world. Now seeing that so much of everything was a lie, I just want to crawl into a hole and never come out. I'm emotionally spent, there are no more tears left to cry right now. There is just this huge void and sick feeling in my stomach 24/7. I'm not eating, I can barely sleep.
I try to move on, but I don't have the slightest feeling towards anyone. I pretty much had to tell someone to get out of my house the other day because just having a girl here made me want to puke. I was honestly a hair away from getting physically ill.
God, please help me. I'm not dealing, I'm not wanting to go on like this.
Please...