I'm that crazy shut in

[feygan]

I was watching Flower Boy Next Door and it made me sad because I know
what it's like to be alone. Not because people hate me or anything
else, but because being around other people makes me nervous and
uncomfortable.

The internet has been a big outlet for me for years, though I find I'm
reluctant to make personal connections online now too. I read the
stories of others and I throw mine out there, but I can't manage to
say anything, not even "hello."

I suppose I was born to lurk. It's just frustrating sometimes, when I
want to say something and I can't force the words out because I KNOW
there's someone out there listening. A real live person.

There's so many people I admire, and it makes me upset my reviews
consist mostly of "Thank you" because the rest of the words won't come
out. Then someone will send me a beautifully worded review and I'll be
too shy to say anything.