Spawn alert!
Sweet jeebus, I'm tired now. Please let there be no classes tomorrow, by some miracle. As if all this snow isn't reason enough. Damn universities.
Yay for being ahead in homework though. It let me do this.
Title: Talks With Dolls
Author: Fey Puck
Fandom: Weiss Kreuz Spawnverse
Rating: R
Pairings: Alex/Tai, and a whole other slew if you squint.
Disclaimer: I don’t actually own Schwarz. The spawn, however, are a different story.
AN: For…anyone that wanted a Spawnfic. The gunboy let me play with his bishies, so he gets at least half of this.
Summary: “Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to walk from here?”
If I were pressed to say why I loved him, I feel that my only reply could be: 'Because it was he, because it was I.'
***
He had made a castle out of Mahjong pieces, the old game taken out from the spare cabinet and dusted off. No one in the apartment knew how to play now, not since his mother had died, but the pieces were easy to stack and easy to order.
Two vertical, one horizontal. Crossed and centered, balance making all the difference.
For Tai it was a playful challenge, a way to pass during that extra hour when he was alone.
Think ,Tai, think. What next? he asked himself as he sat back on the couch-memories etched in worn fabric, first times and first flights. It wasn’t the most elaborate of buildings, true, but he didn’t want to mess it up.
As he began to strategize, singing along to a song on the radio, there was a brief tapping sound on the front door. As if whoever made the sound was unsure of whether they wanted it to be heard or not.
Sighing, Tai slapped his hands against his thighs and regretfully pulled himself off soft cushions, eyes still studying his soon-to-be empire on the coffee table. “Coming,” he called out as he shuffled over to the door, opening it all the way without checking who it was. The way his father always told him to do when he was a kid. He didn’t need to check.
He always knew who it was.
“Alex,” he said as a greeting, smiling at the other boy. He reached out and grabbed the sleeve of a worn coat, tugging in a firm but gentle way until the redhead was out of the cold. “You were out longer this time,” Tai commented as he stripped off Alex’s hat.
Blue-grey eyes watched with a bemused expression as coat fell victim to wandering hands next. “It was nice out.” Eyebrows rose at that remark and Alex corrected himself with a sigh. “It was nicer out. Then it has been. Only four people slipped on ice.”
“You ever going to tell me what you do on those walks?”
“I walk.”
Tai grabbed onto Alex’s wrist, feeling warm skin beneath the palm of his hand. It amazed him, how this boy was always so warm. Constantly aflame even when chills wracked his body, swept up along his bones like an errant wind. He tugged again, until he could feel rough hair brush against his cheek and warm-beneath-cold fingers glide over his hip.
“That’s not really an answer,” Tai murmured into the other boy’s ear, a grin working its way across his face.
Alex snorted, once, fingers dragging across skin until they met the small of his back, dipped farther down for a too short moment before it was gone-all of it gone-as Alex pushed away and headed for the couch.
“Yeah, well, what do you do when I’m gone?” Alex asked, settling back into the cushions, head tipped back slightly in challenge.
Taking his previous seat, leg pressed against leg, Tai gestured grandly towards the Mahjong pieces. “I build empires, of course.”
Alex glanced down, lips twitching into a half-smile even as his shoulders hunched up a bit. “You suck at building castles, Kudou.”
“I don’t. One step at a time.”
“Why Mahjong pieces?”
Tai shrugged, and Alex could feel the movement along his own arm. “They were my mom’s. I think. And they’re…sturdy,” he decided, nodding in satisfaction at his answer.
“I like cards better,” Alex said and leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees, hair swinging forward in a wave of bright colors. His eyes seemed to reflect those colors for a moment, burned for an instant before cool water and mist took over.
Tai wanted to be surrounded by it all. Warmth, colors, flashing chances and burning ghosts-everything he saw in the redhead but still missing pages of his story. As if hearing his thoughts, Alex turned to face him, narrow chin still resting on one upturned hand. One eyebrow arched, questions and challenges in that one movement.
Hand slipped into burnt-colored hair, rough silk wrapped around his fingers, and then Alex moved with him. Twisted, sharp and wild, until lips and teeth crashed together. Messy, biting, but so good and Tai wanted more, much more. Wanted it like that first time, in this same room, with Alex bending beneath him and making those sounds. Once more, once more
Alex straddled his thigh, hard-on pressed against his hip as Tai arched into the sweet-horrible pressure of the other boy’s knee. One hand slipping beneath faded jeans, followed the curve of the redhead’s ass and pulled him closer. Felt hands on his shoulder, on his neck.
Tiny scorch marks, crisp and ash black.
Brand me and tell me apart.
Grinded and pushed and gasped. Erratic, wanting, up against time.
They could have toppled over. Easily and with a laugh. But they didn’t.
Not yet.
Tai pulled a breath’s space away, able to count the freckles across Alex’s nose. “I want to see,” he managed to say, as the fire-started nipped at his ear. “I want to know what you’re thinking.”
Alex tensed in his arms, still breathing hard and moving against the line of his thigh. “What?”
“Don’t you?”
“No. Never.” Alex pushed away, sat back, but wouldn’t look at the Japanese boy. Couldn’t focus on him. “Not you.”
Not you too.
Green eyes narrowed, not in anger but in frustration. In not understanding. Of having what he wanted in his grasp but out of reach. “Yes, me. Everyone keeps telling me I don’t know. I want to.”
Tai pulled and Alex fell, closed the space between so easily it had to be temporary. Neither of them wanted that. Tai had never seen anything completely fall apart. And Alex had lived nothing else.
Make it right, Alex urged himself. Make it right and don’t think about anytimes or maybes.
If he did, it might work. He could stop wandering, finding himself turning back to this apartment and this boy like a stray dog-driven back because it ran out of options and ran out of food. He could stay here with them. Safe, welcomed, protected…
Content? Whole?
Sighing softly, Alex rested his forehead against the black-haired boy’s collarbone. “What do you want to know?” he asked. “I’m not saying I’ll tell you everything. But what do you want to know?”
One soft hand pushed a lock of hair behind his ear. “Something. Anything. Where do you go? Where did you come from?”
Alex grimaced. “Shit, Kudou, where are you getting these lines from?”
“Self-help books.” A pause. “But I’m serious. I’m sick of being in the dark about everything. Even my dad knows more and he’s not…you know…making out with you.”
“Fucking me?”
Tai made a face that Alex couldn’t see but could easily imagine. “Please, Alex, I didn’t need the full image. He’s my dad, you know.”
“You could join in,” Alex offered rather magnanimously. “Keep it in the family.”
“That’s sick.”
Alex grinned to himself, unpleasant and tired. “Yeah. Heh.”
He turned abruptly, sliding away until he was in a sprawl next to Tai. A brief look of hurt or disappointment passed over the still-soft face and strange green eyes.
…over a pale face and amber-brown eyes flecked with blue. “You’re not really going, are you? I’m fine. It didn’t hurt.”
“It’s not about you. And we all heard you screaming.”
“It’s not their fault though. They’re trying to make us something.”
“They can make it out of you, brat. You don’t mind.”
Brett flinched at the disgusted tone, disguised it with a scowl at the last second. “I’m going to be better than them. I’m going to be Schwarz. I want to be.”
“Why?”
“Why not?”
“…if you could, if you were like me, would you leave?”
“No. We’re family.”
And he had left, filled with contempt that would fade over time and the knowledge that it was over. That they’d leave him alone. That he’d never go back.
Only now he wanted to, some part of him at least, and it wouldn’t leave him alone. Cool ripple of water in the back of his mind, touch and go at random intervals that couldn’t be helped. It wasn’t either of their faults.
It soothed, it annoyed, it left an empty place that should be there but felt wrong after all these years.
“Clever, stupid fox,” Alex muttered, hands automatically reaching for the black leather gloves that seemed to always be in his pocket. But they weren’t there, they were tucked away in his coat on the other side of the couch. You know how to get under my skin, don’t you, Brett? Even better than…
Dimly, he was aware of the sound of the door opening and closing; he felt the cool gush of winter air that snuck in as it danced by him and disappeared.
“I think he’s shedding, Tai. I keep finding carrot-top hair everywhere.”
“Dad…”
“Da! Da! Akiichan made the snow go away! And the grass was still green underneath! Me and Kiri-chan can plant a flower now!”
“It’ll die, sweeting.”
“Does everything?”
“Are we dolls, Cailin?”
“Not us. Not any of us.”
“What’s wrong with him? It’s just a Mahjong set. Not that interesting.”
“I don’t know. He’s thinking, I guess.”
“Don’t look so worried, kid.”
“But…”
“I have a brother,” Alex stated suddenly to the faux castle. The silence that followed made him look up, twin sets of jade staring back at him. One surprised and the other grim. “And two cousins.” Princes and princesses and all the king’s men…
“Being trained in the family business?” Youji asked, the lines on his face hard.
The redhead shrugged a shoulder. He hadn’t wanted the ex-assassin to be here when he said this. Hell, he hadn’t know he was going to reveal even this much until he’d opened his mouth and the words had spilled out.
Time to clean up the mess.
“You don’t have to worry about them. I’m just saying this because Tai wanted to know.”
Youji took a step forward. “He doesn’tneed to know though. Not everything. He shouldn’t have to, got it?”
“Then why are you asking now?” His fingers snapped restlessly against each other, an old habit that never died. Just dimmed, waiting to ignited. Close, now, close and waiting.
“Because. Because I need to know if my family if safe. I can only imagine if…shit, if that one-eyed psycho forced someone to have his bastard-”
Alex was on his feet before he even released, fingers scraping together dangerously. “Stop,” he snarled and wasn’t even surprised then they did. They had to. Because no one should talk about those two-his ghost and sidhe-like that. “I don’t care what you say about me or my fathers , but not them.”
Youji’s eyes softened and he sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Saaa…I get it, kid. I just wanna know though. Are they dangerous?”
He thought of saying no, but that would be a lie and the older man would know it. So he said “Not any more than the rest of us” instead and left it at that.
“Right.” Nodding wearily, the eldest Kudou raised his hands in surrender. “They’re coming out of the woodwork,” he said to himself, and made a reminder to keep an eye out for other teenage redheads with attitude problems wandering about.
“What are their names?” Tai asked, quietly. Still absorbing, wondering what it was all about. Wracking a hand through ink colored hair, he took those three steps to the couch and sunk down, staring blandly up at Alex.
The other boy eyed Youji suspiciously, disliked acting like this to a guy who had taken care of him when no one else would, but all the same…the man had been in the rival team, the bad guys in his childhood fairytales. Who knew what connections the man still had, or what jobs he might take on the side that Tai was oblivious to.
“All this serious talk is making my head hurt,” Youji seemed to decide as he said it. “You kids have fun.” But not too much fun was added without words.
The ex-Weiss member disappeared and Alex finally sat back down, back to the position he had been in earlier. Thigh to thigh, knee to knee, arm to arm.
“Why did you-” Tai started but Alex interrupted.
“There’s some things you’re not going to find out, Tai.”
“Will you take me with you on your walk tomorrow?” he asked instead, his first question officially shut down.
Alex shifted slightly, burrowed closer into the other boy’s side as he weighed his options. “Why do you think my walks are so important? You’ve been stuck on them all night.”
“Week, actually, but I didn’t have a chance to mention it. Don’t change the subject,” Tai scolded even as he wrapped an arm around the redhead’s shoulders.
“I’m not. Just wondering. And yeah, fine. I’ll let you come along.”
“You’re so generous, Alex-chan,” Tai teased with a smile. He laughed at the doubtful sound Alex made. “Must be because you love me.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
Heart clenched for a moment, but he kept talking, kept playing. “Any hints about tomorrow?”
“You make it sound like I’m planning a surprise for you,” Alex said as he flicked a piece of hair out of his face with an unconsciously graceful gesture.
You can be so many things, Tai thought. Out loud, he said, “Well, in a way you are.”
“I’m not planning anything. What happens happens. Best case scenario, we walk in circles of an hour or two.”
“Worst case?”
Alex shrugged.
“Either way, I’m happy,” Tai told the redhead. “Don’t exactly know what’s happening, but I’m happy. Empires weren’t built in a day, after all.”
“Heh. Yours won’t even be built in a millennia.”
Tai resisted the urge to retort with a ‘says you’. “Still.”
Alex peered up. “Why?”
“Huh?” Tai said, rather intelligently.
“Why are you happy?”
This time, Tai was the one who shrugged.
Alex watched him for another few moments, then smiled and let the subject go. Instead, he pressed a hot kiss against the other boy’s neck, just below his jaw line at the closest patch of skin. Heard Tai’s breath catch-once, twice-before he stopped, all too aware of the presence in the next room over.
“You might meet a princess someday soon,” Alex said, and Tai blinked in confusion. “The most beautiful princess you’ll ever see.”
***
They left her alone, sometimes, when they were busy with work and the world. They never used to, not when her and her cousins were still growing-Brett and Kirito competing to see above the kitchen counter first-and had always arranged for one of the adults to be home with them. More often than not it was Schuldig, who would teach with a laugh and lay out plans for mayhem, or her Da, patient and quiet and safe.
But she even remembered Uncle Brad sitting with her on the couch one time while the boys played elsewhere, The Secret Garden playing on the television and vanilla ice cream melting in colored porcelain bowls.
Her lips twitched at the memory, half-misty as it was.
But then they could see over the counter, and into the bathroom mirror, and it wasn’t as necessary anymore.
She remembered that horrible first time, when the house had been empty to her, cold shadows and echoing nothing. As if it had all been taken away even though everything was where it should be. Everything but them, her family, the only people in her world.
“I willna have her by herself, Crawford!”
“This is an important client, Farfarello, who is paying handsomely for our services. All of us, as a team, will be there tonight for the function.”
“We’ve only ever needed the four o’ us before.”
“Calm down, Farfie. Naggles and Kirito-chan are handling the computer security systems. Takes one and a half people. Can’t split the kid in half, now can we?”
“Schuldig, you’re not helping. And don’t give him any ideas. I want my son in one piece.”
“Sorry, Naggles. Really.”
“Let your boy stay then, Crawford. Or let me.”
“You’re needed for bodyguard duty. We’ve discussed this.”
“And the boy?”
“If he doesn’t start learning our business first-hand, there won’t be a point to his creation would there? No, Brett’s coming too. As I said.”
“If one hair on her head is hurt…”
“Farfie, we’re not going to let anything happen to her. Two precogs, two telepaths. One of which is yours truly and therefore the best. Relax. Nothing’s going to happen.”
And her Uncle Schu was right, like she knew he usually was even if no one else believed it. There had been no enemies crashing through walls. No thieves breaking in or gunmen at the doors. Just her and the nothing her house was when none of them were around.
It had made her suddenly, horribly sad.
It had made her want to run away.
But instead she sat on the over-stuffed chair in their living room, as she did now and every time in between, legs curled up under her and eyes watching the door. A dagger sat in arm’s reach, shining and patient. A gift, like the ribbons in her hair and the necklace around her neck.
There was no difference in their beauty, so far as she could tell.
When the front door opens, she knows Brett will be the first one in. He had come home early the party that night, twenty minutes before he should have. Uncle Schuldig had waved him off and an order was an order as far as Brett was concerned. He’d hurried home and hadn’t even flinched when he’d seen silver flash-and he must have seen it, something so elegant, for no one should ever miss it.
“Want some cake?” he had asked instead and Cailin had been so happy, so relieved, that she had clung to his arm the rest of the night, followed him around like a lost duckling.
It became a pattern. He was always the first one home after a group assignment, made sure he was, with a treat or a joke or a thought he’d picked up on the way to share.
The door opened and Cailin edged forward in her seat, peering to see against the backdrop of a starless night; there were never any stars, in her experience, except the ones she made herself see. There was a patch of red, hair lank from walking in the cold air so it shadowed his features. Cailin almost saw a double-no, triple-vision. Three people she loved, so similar when carelessly glanced at.
“Brett-chan!” she chirped and hopped off the chair, bare feet hitting the floor silently. “You’re home earlier than Uncle Brad said.”
“’course,” he muttered, tiredly pushing his bangs out of his eyes. “Kirito will be home soon though. He was just dropping something off.” Shoes kicked off and pushed to the side, Brett did an odd shuffle-drag into the living room and collapsed on a couch, leather creaking from the rough treatment.
“Then your dad and my Schuldig will be. They’re bringing…” the redhead trailed off, eyes losing focus and Cailin waited patiently, hands clasped behind her back. It passed, leaving Brett looking mildly annoyed and confused. “Thai? I get visions about dinner now today too. Great.”
“Did you See a lot today?” Cailin asked, padding over to the couch and lightly curling up on the opposite end. Her cousin was looking paler than usual, smudges under his eyes and-she glanced down-his nails had been bitten to the quick, like they always were when too much hit him at once and he struggled to separate futures and nows. “Uncle Nagi won’t be happy. He told you not to do that.”
Brett glanced down, a wry expression on his face. “I’ll make it up to him. We all need our bad habits.”
Gold eyes narrowed. “Did it fill your head?”
“Eh?” Brett stared back, blankly, before smirking. “Just had to dodge some bridges today. I guess my shields have been more gauze than steel lately. Nothing to worry about. Or,” he continued, “to tell my parents about. Right?”
Cailin tugged on one auburn curl, worried. “But it’s been weeks…”
“Only a couple. Oh, here. I brought you something.” Digging something out of his front pocket, Brett tossed it over to his cousin. Forget it, forget it…
“Ah! Brett-chan, I love it!” Cailin exclaimed, holding the tiny porcelain tiger in the palm of her hand. Tiny and porcelain, it still looked fierce. “Where did you get it from?”
“Just a place. What did you get up to today?” he asked, changing the subject before she could coo over it anymore. He looked around, wanting a drink or food or anything to busy himself with, but couldn’t bring himself to leave the soft hug of the couch.
He’d have to make Kirito get him something when the Japanese boy got back…
“I went for a walk! Near the park. I used to be afraid to, without Da, but it’s lovely now. And busy.”
“You talk to anyone around there?”
Cailin giggled. “That would be silly. They’re all just doll-”
The front door swung open. “I’m back!” Kirito yelled to anyone within hearing range. “Did you miss me?” he asked when he wandered towards the two on the couch.
“Desperately,” Brett drawled. “My soul mourned. And my stomach. Float some chips in or something, would ya?”
Kirito glared, as he struggled to escape the confines of his sweatshirt . “Get it yourself.”
“But I’m comfy and Cailin was about to tell me a very important secret.”
That got the telekinetic’s interest. “Secret? About what?”
Cailin looked back and forth between the two, eyes innocent and trying not to smile.
“Well,” Brett said and stretched his arms above his head in a particularly lazy fashion. “She’s not going to tell you.” But I will later if you get me my chips, he added telepathically.
Kirito cast a suspicious glance over him. He didn’t want to agree, but he didn’t want Brett to know something he didn’t…”Fine. I’ll go get a bag,” he conceded and stomped out of the room.
“Brett-chan, that was mean. I don’t have a secret.” Cailin wagged a finger at him.
Brett shrugged. “I’ll tell him you changed your mind. Everyone wins.”
“I don’t see how…” the gold-eyed girl mused, in a way that suggested she didn’t mind one way or another. She didn’t need to know or understand everything, in the end. As long as someone else was around, it was okay.
The telepath glanced at her. “Tell you what. I’m going to skip out on working tomorrow. And we can go to the park together.”
“Won’t Uncle Brad and Uncle Schu be mad at you?”
“Naw. It’ll be fine,” Brett assured her. There was a kind of static in his brain, and a dizzy reel of future clips that he tried to ignore. “Kirito can tag along too, if he wants,” he said, just as the other boy walked into the room, arms full of food and a trail of drinks following behind.
“Tag along where?” Kirito asked as he set everything down.
“To the park tomorrow,” Cailin explained excitedly. “Brett says we’re all going to go.”
Dark eyes slid over to rest on the red-haired boy. “I can’t.” You shouldn’t either…
Relax, would ya? It’s fine. She needs some company. We’ve all been going on non-stop lately.
Brett sighed dramatically. “Aww…Kiri-chan doesn’t want to play. You can just cover for me then, ne?”
“You owe me.”
“Right.”
“You do. A big owe.”
“Ja, ja. It’s settled. Want a blood oath?”
The static buzz was stronger now, a warning sign. Something wasn’t right, he knew it wasn’t, but still. Two choices, and one of them would end up wrong. He didn’t want to know which was which. Not yet.
Some things needed to play out on their own.
Either way, it would be worth it, when Cailin’s face lit up like that and she clapped her hands together as if in prayer. Like she used to when he would ignore their father’s words to play a game with her.
Him, again. Always him.
”Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to walk from here?” he recited proudly, young and trying not to know it, looking up and up at a wide grin.
“That depends on where you want to get to,” said his Schuldig, laugh beneath the surface.
Brett really wished he knew the answer to that.
***
It was cold, in a crisp way, making the day seem clear and bright even as the sun was hidden by a grey sky. The trees were all bare, dead to the world because that’s how they looked. It didn’t matter that they were only waiting for the next season to settle in.
It was all about the appearance.
“Isn’t it beautiful,” Cailin breathed, eyes never holding still as she tried to see everything there was to see. As if she hadn’t walked this same path dozens of other times, alone or surrounded by the family.
It was refreshing to Brett, who always felt as if what he was living was a repeat of some other performance from some other time.
Still…
“Looks the same to me,” he said as was expected, the trademark smirk that was his Schuldig’s firmly in place.
The Irish girl grabbed his hand, soft crimson glove tugging in dismay. “Don’t say that! It always changes. Can’t you see?”
“Sometimes too much,” Brett drawled, and laughed when Cailin tilted her head back to frown at him, a mass of curls escaping from her black bonnet.
Then she smiled. “I’m almost as tall as you,” she said with a gleam of triumph in her eyes. “And Kirito is by a this much…” she held demonstrated with her free hand, index finger and thumb an inch apart.
Brett bristled. “I can still beat him at…well, everything.”
Cailin ‘hmm’-ed, looking strangely smug. “Do you think I’m mad?” she asked suddenly. “Someone said my Da was. I heard. And you all say we’re so alike.”
They always broke apart conversations and completely switched directions in their family, as if trying to keep everyone off balance. Brett grinned. “We’re all mad here.”
Cailin laughed, silvery and flowing, and seemed content with the answer.
A princess… he heard someone think, louder than normal voices were.
The redhead turned his head with a sharp movement, fingers tightening around the hand that held his. Weeded through ghost words and everyday worries until…until…
Green eyes. Black hair.
Shit someone else cursed, and Brett had to think for a moment before he realize it hadn’t been his own thought.
Red and blue, almost hidden by clothes and the body in front of him.
“Akiichan!” Cailin yelled and rushed forward, black boots sounding hollow on the pavement, but was halted by the hand she held.
“Wait, we don’t…”
But the pair was heading towards them. Or, rather, the black haired boy was walking in their direction with purpose while Alex followed behind, hands stuffed into his pockets.
This is a bad idea, Alex thought to himself as he watched Tai approach the black and red clad pair. It’s not the right time. Shit.
He took two fast steps, put himself shoulder to shoulder with Tai, and tried to plan for whatever was coming next. He couldn’t help lean towards his lover, sharing the heat only he had.
Brett raised an eyebrow. “Yo.”
He let his cousin break their hold, let her jump and hug Alex in a swirl laced ruffles and pearl smiles. “You’re here! This is wonderful. I missed you and Da missed you and everyone missed you.”
“I’ve been hearing that a lot lately…”
She pulled away, back towards Brett, coin-eyes shining in the dim winter day. Lucky and precious. “Was it you, those other times? Someone was watching and it felt like you. But you were never there.”
“You’re too bright,” Alex sighed, burrowing deeper into the collar of his coat. “It might have been me.’
“That’s not a real answer!”
The fire-starter offered her a sideways grin. “I’m a mysterious being.”
“You’re something, alright,” Brett muttered to the air beside him.
Tai watched it all like someone might watch a movie, feeling removed from it but no less intrigued. If anything, he was hooked more to this storyline. He studied Brett first, not needing to even ask if this was Alex’s brother. His eyes were different, his nose more pointed, and there was a trace of easy arrogance in every motion the boy made.
It was like trying fit to puzzles together, only to realize they were really one.
He’s better looking. And taller. And…what?!
The Japanese boy jumped a bit, startled and wondering where all that came from, the conviction behind those thoughts already disappearing like wisps of smoke.
Alex grabbed his wrist, palm warmer than it should be. “Lave him alone, brat,” he ordered.
Brett’s smirk widened. “Just trying to make him see the truth. Besides, he thinks loudly.”
“You can deal with it.”
“Sure, take his side over mine, you bastard,” Brett sniffed, hands on his hips and face turned upwards.
Shaking his head, Tai looked at the girl-Cailin-while he half-listened to the conversation. This was the one Alex missed most. It had to be. The redhead had wandered in and out and in to Tai’s life, disappearing for a day here, hours there. Maybe a week. He had to have been doing something, and always seemed restless before he went…
“Fine, I won’t pry. I’ll leave the puppy alone. We sometimes have a puppy too, by the way. You’d like him.”
“Uncle Schu certainly does,” Cailin giggled, rocking back and forth on the soles of her feet.
Alex’s lip curled. “All of you and your pets…”
Brett matched the look with one of his own. “Like you can talk.”
“Hey!” Tai started to protest, feeling he should, but instead he said, “She’s like a d-”
“Don’t,” Alex said, angling his body so he could try and watch the other three at the same time.
Cailin stared at, leaning forward with her hands behind her back and her head tilted to the side. “Why don’t you finish?”
He opened his mouth too, but Brett shifted his position, making Tai look at the youngest redhead. There was a warning there, just like the warning wrapped around his wrist in a loose hold. Instead he looked into gold, a hundred fortunes in those eyes. Entranced, bewitched, lost.
“This was a mistake,” Alex said, letting go, and took a couple steps away. “This is…this is. Fuck.” The air seemed to snap around him, invisible snowflakes disappearing in puffs, paper stars turned to dust.
Someone grabbed his arm, turned him around and he felt it. Felt him. It shot up his spine, a bottle rocket popped open, flooded, too deep to run through without being drenched.
His little brother was staring at him, eyebrows arched. Not sardonic, not demandings, Schuldig or Crawford, just asking him to wait. To stop for him now, if never again.
He could say no. He could grab Tai and run away, his way out, from the lion’s den to gardener’s shed.
“Nii-san…”
Alex remembered watching this fox for hours, a noisy creature that only he could quiet in the beginning. He’d hated it and loved it, neither for a reason that he could ever identify.
“Did you think about it?” Brett asked, fingers curling into thick material. “I wrote a message for you.”
“No.”
The younger Crawford smirked. “Liar. And a terrible one.”
“Watch it, brat, or I’ll set those designer jeans on fire.”
“You did think about it. I felt you thinking about it, Saw something. I felt hot. Like…” the telepath made an irritated sound, waving one hand around. “I don’t know. Or I do. Whatever. But that’s why, part of why…”
Shut up, shut up, stubborn brat, he thought, tried to think of how, like he’d been able to when he was knee-high and too-wise. There was a way, he knew, had seen it in movies and read it in the rare book but it was wrong.
It was tempting.
Not here. Not even when he saw Brett’s breath hitch, echoing his own or maybe the other way around.
Just that much closer…
“Alex?”
The sound of his name made him turn, untangle himself from gossamer webs. Tai stood there, hands by his side and a small smile on his face. Fresh, alive, comfortable while unsure. Normal.
Brett glanced between the two. Filed away what he needed to, already thinking of ways to use it, and decided. “We should go. You ready to go home, Cailin?”
Cailin nodded, skipped a step over and hooked her arm through her cousin’s. “You need to be careful, Akiichan,” she said, not sad but something like it. “He’s a doll.”
Alex froze. He saw Tai look surprised but pleased at the comment, saw the grim look in two sets of tawny eyes.
Two worlds. He couldn’t have both.
“I didn’t even introduce myself,” Tai laughed, tapping the side of his head. “I’m-”
“A name is a powerful thing,” Brett broke in. “They stick out in your mind and make you a target. Keep it away from me.”
Stunned, Tai snapped his mouth shut.
Ushering Cailin, back towards home, Brett waved a vague salute at Alex before turning away. You can thank me for the gift someday, he sent and then was quiet. Everything seemed quiet.
Two worlds, two roads. He didn’t know which one to chose.
“That depends on where you want to go,” said that Chesire grin, ruffling bright hair.
Sitting apart, burning paper in an astray, he said, “I don’t care where I go.”
“Then it doesn’t matter which way you walk.”
Does it?
“Come on. I’ll show you a short-cut home.”
For now, with this person, he’d let someone else decide.
***
“You have fun skipping out, kiddo?” Schuldig asked as soon as Brett walked into the kitchen.
“Honestly? No.”
“Hmm…can’t imagine how it wouldn’t be interesting.”
Brett froze before he recovered himself, noting the smug smirk on his Schuldig’s face as the older man flipped through an old book.
“I had a vision,” he started and left it there.
Schuldig glanced up, blue eyes glinting. “That you ignored. Maybe there is too much of me in you.”
“How’s my father?”
“Oh, Braddles will be fine. Just got shot in the arm. Nothing he hasn’t had to deal with before. He’s being a fuckin baby about it though,” Schuldig growled, turning the next page with more force than necessary. “’Schuldig, get me dinner.’ ‘Schuldig, write the report.’ ‘Schuldig, swallow.’ ‘Schuldig, he’s your son.’”
Groaning, Brett sank down into one of the chairs and let his forehead hit the table. “He’s mad?”
“Fuck yeah. Mostly at himself though, for not Seeing what you Saw.” Schuldig paused, looking thoughtful. “And me, for ducking instead of covering him. Apparently I would’ve only gotten nicked. It’s the bastard’s fault for relying on the wrong vision. If I’d known, I might have stayed put.”
Tilting his head to the side, Brett could just glimpse the long wispy strands of his Schuldig’s hair through the hell-colored strands of his own. “You would have let yourself been hit instead of him?”
A shrug. “Same thing anyways. He gets shot and I suffer the pain of his bitching.”
A thought suddenly struck the younger telepath. “You two actually like each other,” he said, as if it had never actually occurred to him before.
Schuldig gave him an odd look. “No like or dislike about it, brat. No love or hate. Not with us. We just are.”
It was something new.
“Why?” he asked.
A sly look, forget-me-not blue somehow knowing, a grin that could mean anything.
“Why not?”
Yay for being ahead in homework though. It let me do this.
Title: Talks With Dolls
Author: Fey Puck
Fandom: Weiss Kreuz Spawnverse
Rating: R
Pairings: Alex/Tai, and a whole other slew if you squint.
Disclaimer: I don’t actually own Schwarz. The spawn, however, are a different story.
AN: For…anyone that wanted a Spawnfic. The gunboy let me play with his bishies, so he gets at least half of this.
Summary: “Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to walk from here?”
If I were pressed to say why I loved him, I feel that my only reply could be: 'Because it was he, because it was I.'
***
He had made a castle out of Mahjong pieces, the old game taken out from the spare cabinet and dusted off. No one in the apartment knew how to play now, not since his mother had died, but the pieces were easy to stack and easy to order.
Two vertical, one horizontal. Crossed and centered, balance making all the difference.
For Tai it was a playful challenge, a way to pass during that extra hour when he was alone.
Think ,Tai, think. What next? he asked himself as he sat back on the couch-memories etched in worn fabric, first times and first flights. It wasn’t the most elaborate of buildings, true, but he didn’t want to mess it up.
As he began to strategize, singing along to a song on the radio, there was a brief tapping sound on the front door. As if whoever made the sound was unsure of whether they wanted it to be heard or not.
Sighing, Tai slapped his hands against his thighs and regretfully pulled himself off soft cushions, eyes still studying his soon-to-be empire on the coffee table. “Coming,” he called out as he shuffled over to the door, opening it all the way without checking who it was. The way his father always told him to do when he was a kid. He didn’t need to check.
He always knew who it was.
“Alex,” he said as a greeting, smiling at the other boy. He reached out and grabbed the sleeve of a worn coat, tugging in a firm but gentle way until the redhead was out of the cold. “You were out longer this time,” Tai commented as he stripped off Alex’s hat.
Blue-grey eyes watched with a bemused expression as coat fell victim to wandering hands next. “It was nice out.” Eyebrows rose at that remark and Alex corrected himself with a sigh. “It was nicer out. Then it has been. Only four people slipped on ice.”
“You ever going to tell me what you do on those walks?”
“I walk.”
Tai grabbed onto Alex’s wrist, feeling warm skin beneath the palm of his hand. It amazed him, how this boy was always so warm. Constantly aflame even when chills wracked his body, swept up along his bones like an errant wind. He tugged again, until he could feel rough hair brush against his cheek and warm-beneath-cold fingers glide over his hip.
“That’s not really an answer,” Tai murmured into the other boy’s ear, a grin working its way across his face.
Alex snorted, once, fingers dragging across skin until they met the small of his back, dipped farther down for a too short moment before it was gone-all of it gone-as Alex pushed away and headed for the couch.
“Yeah, well, what do you do when I’m gone?” Alex asked, settling back into the cushions, head tipped back slightly in challenge.
Taking his previous seat, leg pressed against leg, Tai gestured grandly towards the Mahjong pieces. “I build empires, of course.”
Alex glanced down, lips twitching into a half-smile even as his shoulders hunched up a bit. “You suck at building castles, Kudou.”
“I don’t. One step at a time.”
“Why Mahjong pieces?”
Tai shrugged, and Alex could feel the movement along his own arm. “They were my mom’s. I think. And they’re…sturdy,” he decided, nodding in satisfaction at his answer.
“I like cards better,” Alex said and leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees, hair swinging forward in a wave of bright colors. His eyes seemed to reflect those colors for a moment, burned for an instant before cool water and mist took over.
Tai wanted to be surrounded by it all. Warmth, colors, flashing chances and burning ghosts-everything he saw in the redhead but still missing pages of his story. As if hearing his thoughts, Alex turned to face him, narrow chin still resting on one upturned hand. One eyebrow arched, questions and challenges in that one movement.
Hand slipped into burnt-colored hair, rough silk wrapped around his fingers, and then Alex moved with him. Twisted, sharp and wild, until lips and teeth crashed together. Messy, biting, but so good and Tai wanted more, much more. Wanted it like that first time, in this same room, with Alex bending beneath him and making those sounds. Once more, once more
Alex straddled his thigh, hard-on pressed against his hip as Tai arched into the sweet-horrible pressure of the other boy’s knee. One hand slipping beneath faded jeans, followed the curve of the redhead’s ass and pulled him closer. Felt hands on his shoulder, on his neck.
Tiny scorch marks, crisp and ash black.
Brand me and tell me apart.
Grinded and pushed and gasped. Erratic, wanting, up against time.
They could have toppled over. Easily and with a laugh. But they didn’t.
Not yet.
Tai pulled a breath’s space away, able to count the freckles across Alex’s nose. “I want to see,” he managed to say, as the fire-started nipped at his ear. “I want to know what you’re thinking.”
Alex tensed in his arms, still breathing hard and moving against the line of his thigh. “What?”
“Don’t you?”
“No. Never.” Alex pushed away, sat back, but wouldn’t look at the Japanese boy. Couldn’t focus on him. “Not you.”
Not you too.
Green eyes narrowed, not in anger but in frustration. In not understanding. Of having what he wanted in his grasp but out of reach. “Yes, me. Everyone keeps telling me I don’t know. I want to.”
Tai pulled and Alex fell, closed the space between so easily it had to be temporary. Neither of them wanted that. Tai had never seen anything completely fall apart. And Alex had lived nothing else.
Make it right, Alex urged himself. Make it right and don’t think about anytimes or maybes.
If he did, it might work. He could stop wandering, finding himself turning back to this apartment and this boy like a stray dog-driven back because it ran out of options and ran out of food. He could stay here with them. Safe, welcomed, protected…
Content? Whole?
Sighing softly, Alex rested his forehead against the black-haired boy’s collarbone. “What do you want to know?” he asked. “I’m not saying I’ll tell you everything. But what do you want to know?”
One soft hand pushed a lock of hair behind his ear. “Something. Anything. Where do you go? Where did you come from?”
Alex grimaced. “Shit, Kudou, where are you getting these lines from?”
“Self-help books.” A pause. “But I’m serious. I’m sick of being in the dark about everything. Even my dad knows more and he’s not…you know…making out with you.”
“Fucking me?”
Tai made a face that Alex couldn’t see but could easily imagine. “Please, Alex, I didn’t need the full image. He’s my dad, you know.”
“You could join in,” Alex offered rather magnanimously. “Keep it in the family.”
“That’s sick.”
Alex grinned to himself, unpleasant and tired. “Yeah. Heh.”
He turned abruptly, sliding away until he was in a sprawl next to Tai. A brief look of hurt or disappointment passed over the still-soft face and strange green eyes.
…over a pale face and amber-brown eyes flecked with blue. “You’re not really going, are you? I’m fine. It didn’t hurt.”
“It’s not about you. And we all heard you screaming.”
“It’s not their fault though. They’re trying to make us something.”
“They can make it out of you, brat. You don’t mind.”
Brett flinched at the disgusted tone, disguised it with a scowl at the last second. “I’m going to be better than them. I’m going to be Schwarz. I want to be.”
“Why?”
“Why not?”
“…if you could, if you were like me, would you leave?”
“No. We’re family.”
And he had left, filled with contempt that would fade over time and the knowledge that it was over. That they’d leave him alone. That he’d never go back.
Only now he wanted to, some part of him at least, and it wouldn’t leave him alone. Cool ripple of water in the back of his mind, touch and go at random intervals that couldn’t be helped. It wasn’t either of their faults.
It soothed, it annoyed, it left an empty place that should be there but felt wrong after all these years.
“Clever, stupid fox,” Alex muttered, hands automatically reaching for the black leather gloves that seemed to always be in his pocket. But they weren’t there, they were tucked away in his coat on the other side of the couch. You know how to get under my skin, don’t you, Brett? Even better than…
Dimly, he was aware of the sound of the door opening and closing; he felt the cool gush of winter air that snuck in as it danced by him and disappeared.
“I think he’s shedding, Tai. I keep finding carrot-top hair everywhere.”
“Dad…”
“Da! Da! Akiichan made the snow go away! And the grass was still green underneath! Me and Kiri-chan can plant a flower now!”
“It’ll die, sweeting.”
“Does everything?”
“Are we dolls, Cailin?”
“Not us. Not any of us.”
“What’s wrong with him? It’s just a Mahjong set. Not that interesting.”
“I don’t know. He’s thinking, I guess.”
“Don’t look so worried, kid.”
“But…”
“I have a brother,” Alex stated suddenly to the faux castle. The silence that followed made him look up, twin sets of jade staring back at him. One surprised and the other grim. “And two cousins.” Princes and princesses and all the king’s men…
“Being trained in the family business?” Youji asked, the lines on his face hard.
The redhead shrugged a shoulder. He hadn’t wanted the ex-assassin to be here when he said this. Hell, he hadn’t know he was going to reveal even this much until he’d opened his mouth and the words had spilled out.
Time to clean up the mess.
“You don’t have to worry about them. I’m just saying this because Tai wanted to know.”
Youji took a step forward. “He doesn’tneed to know though. Not everything. He shouldn’t have to, got it?”
“Then why are you asking now?” His fingers snapped restlessly against each other, an old habit that never died. Just dimmed, waiting to ignited. Close, now, close and waiting.
“Because. Because I need to know if my family if safe. I can only imagine if…shit, if that one-eyed psycho forced someone to have his bastard-”
Alex was on his feet before he even released, fingers scraping together dangerously. “Stop,” he snarled and wasn’t even surprised then they did. They had to. Because no one should talk about those two-his ghost and sidhe-like that. “I don’t care what you say about me or my fathers , but not them.”
Youji’s eyes softened and he sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Saaa…I get it, kid. I just wanna know though. Are they dangerous?”
He thought of saying no, but that would be a lie and the older man would know it. So he said “Not any more than the rest of us” instead and left it at that.
“Right.” Nodding wearily, the eldest Kudou raised his hands in surrender. “They’re coming out of the woodwork,” he said to himself, and made a reminder to keep an eye out for other teenage redheads with attitude problems wandering about.
“What are their names?” Tai asked, quietly. Still absorbing, wondering what it was all about. Wracking a hand through ink colored hair, he took those three steps to the couch and sunk down, staring blandly up at Alex.
The other boy eyed Youji suspiciously, disliked acting like this to a guy who had taken care of him when no one else would, but all the same…the man had been in the rival team, the bad guys in his childhood fairytales. Who knew what connections the man still had, or what jobs he might take on the side that Tai was oblivious to.
“All this serious talk is making my head hurt,” Youji seemed to decide as he said it. “You kids have fun.” But not too much fun was added without words.
The ex-Weiss member disappeared and Alex finally sat back down, back to the position he had been in earlier. Thigh to thigh, knee to knee, arm to arm.
“Why did you-” Tai started but Alex interrupted.
“There’s some things you’re not going to find out, Tai.”
“Will you take me with you on your walk tomorrow?” he asked instead, his first question officially shut down.
Alex shifted slightly, burrowed closer into the other boy’s side as he weighed his options. “Why do you think my walks are so important? You’ve been stuck on them all night.”
“Week, actually, but I didn’t have a chance to mention it. Don’t change the subject,” Tai scolded even as he wrapped an arm around the redhead’s shoulders.
“I’m not. Just wondering. And yeah, fine. I’ll let you come along.”
“You’re so generous, Alex-chan,” Tai teased with a smile. He laughed at the doubtful sound Alex made. “Must be because you love me.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
Heart clenched for a moment, but he kept talking, kept playing. “Any hints about tomorrow?”
“You make it sound like I’m planning a surprise for you,” Alex said as he flicked a piece of hair out of his face with an unconsciously graceful gesture.
You can be so many things, Tai thought. Out loud, he said, “Well, in a way you are.”
“I’m not planning anything. What happens happens. Best case scenario, we walk in circles of an hour or two.”
“Worst case?”
Alex shrugged.
“Either way, I’m happy,” Tai told the redhead. “Don’t exactly know what’s happening, but I’m happy. Empires weren’t built in a day, after all.”
“Heh. Yours won’t even be built in a millennia.”
Tai resisted the urge to retort with a ‘says you’. “Still.”
Alex peered up. “Why?”
“Huh?” Tai said, rather intelligently.
“Why are you happy?”
This time, Tai was the one who shrugged.
Alex watched him for another few moments, then smiled and let the subject go. Instead, he pressed a hot kiss against the other boy’s neck, just below his jaw line at the closest patch of skin. Heard Tai’s breath catch-once, twice-before he stopped, all too aware of the presence in the next room over.
“You might meet a princess someday soon,” Alex said, and Tai blinked in confusion. “The most beautiful princess you’ll ever see.”
***
They left her alone, sometimes, when they were busy with work and the world. They never used to, not when her and her cousins were still growing-Brett and Kirito competing to see above the kitchen counter first-and had always arranged for one of the adults to be home with them. More often than not it was Schuldig, who would teach with a laugh and lay out plans for mayhem, or her Da, patient and quiet and safe.
But she even remembered Uncle Brad sitting with her on the couch one time while the boys played elsewhere, The Secret Garden playing on the television and vanilla ice cream melting in colored porcelain bowls.
Her lips twitched at the memory, half-misty as it was.
But then they could see over the counter, and into the bathroom mirror, and it wasn’t as necessary anymore.
She remembered that horrible first time, when the house had been empty to her, cold shadows and echoing nothing. As if it had all been taken away even though everything was where it should be. Everything but them, her family, the only people in her world.
“I willna have her by herself, Crawford!”
“This is an important client, Farfarello, who is paying handsomely for our services. All of us, as a team, will be there tonight for the function.”
“We’ve only ever needed the four o’ us before.”
“Calm down, Farfie. Naggles and Kirito-chan are handling the computer security systems. Takes one and a half people. Can’t split the kid in half, now can we?”
“Schuldig, you’re not helping. And don’t give him any ideas. I want my son in one piece.”
“Sorry, Naggles. Really.”
“Let your boy stay then, Crawford. Or let me.”
“You’re needed for bodyguard duty. We’ve discussed this.”
“And the boy?”
“If he doesn’t start learning our business first-hand, there won’t be a point to his creation would there? No, Brett’s coming too. As I said.”
“If one hair on her head is hurt…”
“Farfie, we’re not going to let anything happen to her. Two precogs, two telepaths. One of which is yours truly and therefore the best. Relax. Nothing’s going to happen.”
And her Uncle Schu was right, like she knew he usually was even if no one else believed it. There had been no enemies crashing through walls. No thieves breaking in or gunmen at the doors. Just her and the nothing her house was when none of them were around.
It had made her suddenly, horribly sad.
It had made her want to run away.
But instead she sat on the over-stuffed chair in their living room, as she did now and every time in between, legs curled up under her and eyes watching the door. A dagger sat in arm’s reach, shining and patient. A gift, like the ribbons in her hair and the necklace around her neck.
There was no difference in their beauty, so far as she could tell.
When the front door opens, she knows Brett will be the first one in. He had come home early the party that night, twenty minutes before he should have. Uncle Schuldig had waved him off and an order was an order as far as Brett was concerned. He’d hurried home and hadn’t even flinched when he’d seen silver flash-and he must have seen it, something so elegant, for no one should ever miss it.
“Want some cake?” he had asked instead and Cailin had been so happy, so relieved, that she had clung to his arm the rest of the night, followed him around like a lost duckling.
It became a pattern. He was always the first one home after a group assignment, made sure he was, with a treat or a joke or a thought he’d picked up on the way to share.
The door opened and Cailin edged forward in her seat, peering to see against the backdrop of a starless night; there were never any stars, in her experience, except the ones she made herself see. There was a patch of red, hair lank from walking in the cold air so it shadowed his features. Cailin almost saw a double-no, triple-vision. Three people she loved, so similar when carelessly glanced at.
“Brett-chan!” she chirped and hopped off the chair, bare feet hitting the floor silently. “You’re home earlier than Uncle Brad said.”
“’course,” he muttered, tiredly pushing his bangs out of his eyes. “Kirito will be home soon though. He was just dropping something off.” Shoes kicked off and pushed to the side, Brett did an odd shuffle-drag into the living room and collapsed on a couch, leather creaking from the rough treatment.
“Then your dad and my Schuldig will be. They’re bringing…” the redhead trailed off, eyes losing focus and Cailin waited patiently, hands clasped behind her back. It passed, leaving Brett looking mildly annoyed and confused. “Thai? I get visions about dinner now today too. Great.”
“Did you See a lot today?” Cailin asked, padding over to the couch and lightly curling up on the opposite end. Her cousin was looking paler than usual, smudges under his eyes and-she glanced down-his nails had been bitten to the quick, like they always were when too much hit him at once and he struggled to separate futures and nows. “Uncle Nagi won’t be happy. He told you not to do that.”
Brett glanced down, a wry expression on his face. “I’ll make it up to him. We all need our bad habits.”
Gold eyes narrowed. “Did it fill your head?”
“Eh?” Brett stared back, blankly, before smirking. “Just had to dodge some bridges today. I guess my shields have been more gauze than steel lately. Nothing to worry about. Or,” he continued, “to tell my parents about. Right?”
Cailin tugged on one auburn curl, worried. “But it’s been weeks…”
“Only a couple. Oh, here. I brought you something.” Digging something out of his front pocket, Brett tossed it over to his cousin. Forget it, forget it…
“Ah! Brett-chan, I love it!” Cailin exclaimed, holding the tiny porcelain tiger in the palm of her hand. Tiny and porcelain, it still looked fierce. “Where did you get it from?”
“Just a place. What did you get up to today?” he asked, changing the subject before she could coo over it anymore. He looked around, wanting a drink or food or anything to busy himself with, but couldn’t bring himself to leave the soft hug of the couch.
He’d have to make Kirito get him something when the Japanese boy got back…
“I went for a walk! Near the park. I used to be afraid to, without Da, but it’s lovely now. And busy.”
“You talk to anyone around there?”
Cailin giggled. “That would be silly. They’re all just doll-”
The front door swung open. “I’m back!” Kirito yelled to anyone within hearing range. “Did you miss me?” he asked when he wandered towards the two on the couch.
“Desperately,” Brett drawled. “My soul mourned. And my stomach. Float some chips in or something, would ya?”
Kirito glared, as he struggled to escape the confines of his sweatshirt . “Get it yourself.”
“But I’m comfy and Cailin was about to tell me a very important secret.”
That got the telekinetic’s interest. “Secret? About what?”
Cailin looked back and forth between the two, eyes innocent and trying not to smile.
“Well,” Brett said and stretched his arms above his head in a particularly lazy fashion. “She’s not going to tell you.” But I will later if you get me my chips, he added telepathically.
Kirito cast a suspicious glance over him. He didn’t want to agree, but he didn’t want Brett to know something he didn’t…”Fine. I’ll go get a bag,” he conceded and stomped out of the room.
“Brett-chan, that was mean. I don’t have a secret.” Cailin wagged a finger at him.
Brett shrugged. “I’ll tell him you changed your mind. Everyone wins.”
“I don’t see how…” the gold-eyed girl mused, in a way that suggested she didn’t mind one way or another. She didn’t need to know or understand everything, in the end. As long as someone else was around, it was okay.
The telepath glanced at her. “Tell you what. I’m going to skip out on working tomorrow. And we can go to the park together.”
“Won’t Uncle Brad and Uncle Schu be mad at you?”
“Naw. It’ll be fine,” Brett assured her. There was a kind of static in his brain, and a dizzy reel of future clips that he tried to ignore. “Kirito can tag along too, if he wants,” he said, just as the other boy walked into the room, arms full of food and a trail of drinks following behind.
“Tag along where?” Kirito asked as he set everything down.
“To the park tomorrow,” Cailin explained excitedly. “Brett says we’re all going to go.”
Dark eyes slid over to rest on the red-haired boy. “I can’t.” You shouldn’t either…
Relax, would ya? It’s fine. She needs some company. We’ve all been going on non-stop lately.
Brett sighed dramatically. “Aww…Kiri-chan doesn’t want to play. You can just cover for me then, ne?”
“You owe me.”
“Right.”
“You do. A big owe.”
“Ja, ja. It’s settled. Want a blood oath?”
The static buzz was stronger now, a warning sign. Something wasn’t right, he knew it wasn’t, but still. Two choices, and one of them would end up wrong. He didn’t want to know which was which. Not yet.
Some things needed to play out on their own.
Either way, it would be worth it, when Cailin’s face lit up like that and she clapped her hands together as if in prayer. Like she used to when he would ignore their father’s words to play a game with her.
Him, again. Always him.
”Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to walk from here?” he recited proudly, young and trying not to know it, looking up and up at a wide grin.
“That depends on where you want to get to,” said his Schuldig, laugh beneath the surface.
Brett really wished he knew the answer to that.
***
It was cold, in a crisp way, making the day seem clear and bright even as the sun was hidden by a grey sky. The trees were all bare, dead to the world because that’s how they looked. It didn’t matter that they were only waiting for the next season to settle in.
It was all about the appearance.
“Isn’t it beautiful,” Cailin breathed, eyes never holding still as she tried to see everything there was to see. As if she hadn’t walked this same path dozens of other times, alone or surrounded by the family.
It was refreshing to Brett, who always felt as if what he was living was a repeat of some other performance from some other time.
Still…
“Looks the same to me,” he said as was expected, the trademark smirk that was his Schuldig’s firmly in place.
The Irish girl grabbed his hand, soft crimson glove tugging in dismay. “Don’t say that! It always changes. Can’t you see?”
“Sometimes too much,” Brett drawled, and laughed when Cailin tilted her head back to frown at him, a mass of curls escaping from her black bonnet.
Then she smiled. “I’m almost as tall as you,” she said with a gleam of triumph in her eyes. “And Kirito is by a this much…” she held demonstrated with her free hand, index finger and thumb an inch apart.
Brett bristled. “I can still beat him at…well, everything.”
Cailin ‘hmm’-ed, looking strangely smug. “Do you think I’m mad?” she asked suddenly. “Someone said my Da was. I heard. And you all say we’re so alike.”
They always broke apart conversations and completely switched directions in their family, as if trying to keep everyone off balance. Brett grinned. “We’re all mad here.”
Cailin laughed, silvery and flowing, and seemed content with the answer.
A princess… he heard someone think, louder than normal voices were.
The redhead turned his head with a sharp movement, fingers tightening around the hand that held his. Weeded through ghost words and everyday worries until…until…
Green eyes. Black hair.
Shit someone else cursed, and Brett had to think for a moment before he realize it hadn’t been his own thought.
Red and blue, almost hidden by clothes and the body in front of him.
“Akiichan!” Cailin yelled and rushed forward, black boots sounding hollow on the pavement, but was halted by the hand she held.
“Wait, we don’t…”
But the pair was heading towards them. Or, rather, the black haired boy was walking in their direction with purpose while Alex followed behind, hands stuffed into his pockets.
This is a bad idea, Alex thought to himself as he watched Tai approach the black and red clad pair. It’s not the right time. Shit.
He took two fast steps, put himself shoulder to shoulder with Tai, and tried to plan for whatever was coming next. He couldn’t help lean towards his lover, sharing the heat only he had.
Brett raised an eyebrow. “Yo.”
He let his cousin break their hold, let her jump and hug Alex in a swirl laced ruffles and pearl smiles. “You’re here! This is wonderful. I missed you and Da missed you and everyone missed you.”
“I’ve been hearing that a lot lately…”
She pulled away, back towards Brett, coin-eyes shining in the dim winter day. Lucky and precious. “Was it you, those other times? Someone was watching and it felt like you. But you were never there.”
“You’re too bright,” Alex sighed, burrowing deeper into the collar of his coat. “It might have been me.’
“That’s not a real answer!”
The fire-starter offered her a sideways grin. “I’m a mysterious being.”
“You’re something, alright,” Brett muttered to the air beside him.
Tai watched it all like someone might watch a movie, feeling removed from it but no less intrigued. If anything, he was hooked more to this storyline. He studied Brett first, not needing to even ask if this was Alex’s brother. His eyes were different, his nose more pointed, and there was a trace of easy arrogance in every motion the boy made.
It was like trying fit to puzzles together, only to realize they were really one.
He’s better looking. And taller. And…what?!
The Japanese boy jumped a bit, startled and wondering where all that came from, the conviction behind those thoughts already disappearing like wisps of smoke.
Alex grabbed his wrist, palm warmer than it should be. “Lave him alone, brat,” he ordered.
Brett’s smirk widened. “Just trying to make him see the truth. Besides, he thinks loudly.”
“You can deal with it.”
“Sure, take his side over mine, you bastard,” Brett sniffed, hands on his hips and face turned upwards.
Shaking his head, Tai looked at the girl-Cailin-while he half-listened to the conversation. This was the one Alex missed most. It had to be. The redhead had wandered in and out and in to Tai’s life, disappearing for a day here, hours there. Maybe a week. He had to have been doing something, and always seemed restless before he went…
“Fine, I won’t pry. I’ll leave the puppy alone. We sometimes have a puppy too, by the way. You’d like him.”
“Uncle Schu certainly does,” Cailin giggled, rocking back and forth on the soles of her feet.
Alex’s lip curled. “All of you and your pets…”
Brett matched the look with one of his own. “Like you can talk.”
“Hey!” Tai started to protest, feeling he should, but instead he said, “She’s like a d-”
“Don’t,” Alex said, angling his body so he could try and watch the other three at the same time.
Cailin stared at, leaning forward with her hands behind her back and her head tilted to the side. “Why don’t you finish?”
He opened his mouth too, but Brett shifted his position, making Tai look at the youngest redhead. There was a warning there, just like the warning wrapped around his wrist in a loose hold. Instead he looked into gold, a hundred fortunes in those eyes. Entranced, bewitched, lost.
“This was a mistake,” Alex said, letting go, and took a couple steps away. “This is…this is. Fuck.” The air seemed to snap around him, invisible snowflakes disappearing in puffs, paper stars turned to dust.
Someone grabbed his arm, turned him around and he felt it. Felt him. It shot up his spine, a bottle rocket popped open, flooded, too deep to run through without being drenched.
His little brother was staring at him, eyebrows arched. Not sardonic, not demandings, Schuldig or Crawford, just asking him to wait. To stop for him now, if never again.
He could say no. He could grab Tai and run away, his way out, from the lion’s den to gardener’s shed.
“Nii-san…”
Alex remembered watching this fox for hours, a noisy creature that only he could quiet in the beginning. He’d hated it and loved it, neither for a reason that he could ever identify.
“Did you think about it?” Brett asked, fingers curling into thick material. “I wrote a message for you.”
“No.”
The younger Crawford smirked. “Liar. And a terrible one.”
“Watch it, brat, or I’ll set those designer jeans on fire.”
“You did think about it. I felt you thinking about it, Saw something. I felt hot. Like…” the telepath made an irritated sound, waving one hand around. “I don’t know. Or I do. Whatever. But that’s why, part of why…”
Shut up, shut up, stubborn brat, he thought, tried to think of how, like he’d been able to when he was knee-high and too-wise. There was a way, he knew, had seen it in movies and read it in the rare book but it was wrong.
It was tempting.
Not here. Not even when he saw Brett’s breath hitch, echoing his own or maybe the other way around.
Just that much closer…
“Alex?”
The sound of his name made him turn, untangle himself from gossamer webs. Tai stood there, hands by his side and a small smile on his face. Fresh, alive, comfortable while unsure. Normal.
Brett glanced between the two. Filed away what he needed to, already thinking of ways to use it, and decided. “We should go. You ready to go home, Cailin?”
Cailin nodded, skipped a step over and hooked her arm through her cousin’s. “You need to be careful, Akiichan,” she said, not sad but something like it. “He’s a doll.”
Alex froze. He saw Tai look surprised but pleased at the comment, saw the grim look in two sets of tawny eyes.
Two worlds. He couldn’t have both.
“I didn’t even introduce myself,” Tai laughed, tapping the side of his head. “I’m-”
“A name is a powerful thing,” Brett broke in. “They stick out in your mind and make you a target. Keep it away from me.”
Stunned, Tai snapped his mouth shut.
Ushering Cailin, back towards home, Brett waved a vague salute at Alex before turning away. You can thank me for the gift someday, he sent and then was quiet. Everything seemed quiet.
Two worlds, two roads. He didn’t know which one to chose.
“That depends on where you want to go,” said that Chesire grin, ruffling bright hair.
Sitting apart, burning paper in an astray, he said, “I don’t care where I go.”
“Then it doesn’t matter which way you walk.”
Does it?
“Come on. I’ll show you a short-cut home.”
For now, with this person, he’d let someone else decide.
***
“You have fun skipping out, kiddo?” Schuldig asked as soon as Brett walked into the kitchen.
“Honestly? No.”
“Hmm…can’t imagine how it wouldn’t be interesting.”
Brett froze before he recovered himself, noting the smug smirk on his Schuldig’s face as the older man flipped through an old book.
“I had a vision,” he started and left it there.
Schuldig glanced up, blue eyes glinting. “That you ignored. Maybe there is too much of me in you.”
“How’s my father?”
“Oh, Braddles will be fine. Just got shot in the arm. Nothing he hasn’t had to deal with before. He’s being a fuckin baby about it though,” Schuldig growled, turning the next page with more force than necessary. “’Schuldig, get me dinner.’ ‘Schuldig, write the report.’ ‘Schuldig, swallow.’ ‘Schuldig, he’s your son.’”
Groaning, Brett sank down into one of the chairs and let his forehead hit the table. “He’s mad?”
“Fuck yeah. Mostly at himself though, for not Seeing what you Saw.” Schuldig paused, looking thoughtful. “And me, for ducking instead of covering him. Apparently I would’ve only gotten nicked. It’s the bastard’s fault for relying on the wrong vision. If I’d known, I might have stayed put.”
Tilting his head to the side, Brett could just glimpse the long wispy strands of his Schuldig’s hair through the hell-colored strands of his own. “You would have let yourself been hit instead of him?”
A shrug. “Same thing anyways. He gets shot and I suffer the pain of his bitching.”
A thought suddenly struck the younger telepath. “You two actually like each other,” he said, as if it had never actually occurred to him before.
Schuldig gave him an odd look. “No like or dislike about it, brat. No love or hate. Not with us. We just are.”
It was something new.
“Why?” he asked.
A sly look, forget-me-not blue somehow knowing, a grin that could mean anything.
“Why not?”