(no subject)
today is far too beautiful for work. but there i go. work and school, school and work. i'm so bored. my parent's tell me i need to get a grip, but i can't even get a handle. i'm over and under whelmed. last night i'm sitting in british lit and the professor is lecturing about the condition of the human heart, how at one point it was considered that everyone's was all the same. but now we're evolving so far and so fast that art doesn't or hardly even affects, and so the condition as it once was cannot nearly be the same. we're basically jaded. and i sit and i am shaking and my heart is racing and that's all i can think about because i really don't care anymore. i don't care about art and i don't care about literature and i don't care about writing and i don't care about the difference. because the meaning or value one places on one's life is all the same over time and even being the most well read and even transcribing the most poignant of thoughts doesn't change any of that. this may be a new phase i'm entering or this may be it. sometimes i just don't believe i have much time left. but all i want is time.