truth_or_dare - Discuss a habit you would like to quit
I’ll admit it. I have a habit of putting myself down. It’s not something I enjoy, believe me, and I’m not fishing for compliments. It’s like…the way English teachers don’t understand math teachers, the way Democrats don’t understand Republicans, the way conservative parents don’t understand their bohemian children. That’s the way I feel about people who see the good in me. I just can’t understand it.
My therapist says it’s a deep-rooted psychological issue (though, he would). He thinks it has something to do with my parents (which, again, he would). Evidently my father pushed me too hard and I was never good enough. He paid too much attention to me and my mother paid too little. Dr. Griffin says that combination was lethal for me. But the idea of blaming every little aspect of my neuroses on my parents makes me uncomfortable. I think about Eleanor Roosevelt’s insightful yet unfortunately overused mantra: “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
The problem with that is, if you’re feeling inferior anyway, Mrs. Roosevelt is just letting you know that it’s your own fault you feel that way, thus furthering those feelings of inferiority. Really, it’s just a vicious cycle. I feel inferior, it’s my fault, I feel more inferior. That, essentially, sums up my problem.
I’d give anything to be able to readily accept a compliment for once. I want to believe it when someone tells me I’m intelligent or beautiful. It hurts to hear these things and view them as lies. Humility is a virtue, but take it too far and it should be a sin. Nothing hurts worse than not being able to believe the ones you love.
Damn inferiority complex. I wish I knew how to quit you! (But I don’t, because I’m inferior.)
Muse: Martha Kent
Fandom: Smallville
Word Count: 299
My therapist says it’s a deep-rooted psychological issue (though, he would). He thinks it has something to do with my parents (which, again, he would). Evidently my father pushed me too hard and I was never good enough. He paid too much attention to me and my mother paid too little. Dr. Griffin says that combination was lethal for me. But the idea of blaming every little aspect of my neuroses on my parents makes me uncomfortable. I think about Eleanor Roosevelt’s insightful yet unfortunately overused mantra: “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
The problem with that is, if you’re feeling inferior anyway, Mrs. Roosevelt is just letting you know that it’s your own fault you feel that way, thus furthering those feelings of inferiority. Really, it’s just a vicious cycle. I feel inferior, it’s my fault, I feel more inferior. That, essentially, sums up my problem.
I’d give anything to be able to readily accept a compliment for once. I want to believe it when someone tells me I’m intelligent or beautiful. It hurts to hear these things and view them as lies. Humility is a virtue, but take it too far and it should be a sin. Nothing hurts worse than not being able to believe the ones you love.
Damn inferiority complex. I wish I knew how to quit you! (But I don’t, because I’m inferior.)
Muse: Martha Kent
Fandom: Smallville
Word Count: 299