couples_therapy -
Discuss your family's opinion of your partner and how much their feelings influence you.
Their feelings didn't influence me at all. My parents' feelings, that is. They hated Jonathan. They hated everything about him. Where he was from, how he lived, the way he dressed, the way he talked. Everything. I knew they would hate him the minute he asked me out. Sometimes I think that's the reason I said yes in the first place. To tick off my parents. Even I couldn't have predicted I'd fall head over heels in love with the farmer from Smallville, of all places.
When I introduced Jonathan to my parents, my mother just stared at him, mouth wide open, as if I'd brought a martian into our lavish townhouse. The first thing my father did was shove his hands into his pockets and give Jonathan was the once-over, actually walking around him with a critical eye. So...pompous. Always so belittling. Jonathan smiled nervously and held out his hand, and my father shook his head. He said, "No. I'm sorry, but no. This ends here." Jonathan looked at me, thoroughly baffled, and I protested. But my father just said, straight out, "Son, you're not good enough for my daughter. That's all there is to it." I grabbed Jonathan's hand and dragged him out of the house in the huff. He never got past the foyer.
Jonathan and I walked a few blocks to the park, and sat on a bench as I cried. The way sheltered 21-year-old girls do when their parents humiliate and frustrate them. Jonathan put all his energy into comforting me, and telling me it didn't matter, but I knew he was just as upset as I was, though he'd never show it. At least not until after he asked my father for my hand in marriage, and ended up punching him in the nose, but that's a story for another time.
Truthfully I've always suspected my mother was secretly attracted to him, because who wouldn't be? I'm the envy of every woman I know.
Their feelings didn't influence me at all. My parents' feelings, that is. They hated Jonathan. They hated everything about him. Where he was from, how he lived, the way he dressed, the way he talked. Everything. I knew they would hate him the minute he asked me out. Sometimes I think that's the reason I said yes in the first place. To tick off my parents. Even I couldn't have predicted I'd fall head over heels in love with the farmer from Smallville, of all places.
When I introduced Jonathan to my parents, my mother just stared at him, mouth wide open, as if I'd brought a martian into our lavish townhouse. The first thing my father did was shove his hands into his pockets and give Jonathan was the once-over, actually walking around him with a critical eye. So...pompous. Always so belittling. Jonathan smiled nervously and held out his hand, and my father shook his head. He said, "No. I'm sorry, but no. This ends here." Jonathan looked at me, thoroughly baffled, and I protested. But my father just said, straight out, "Son, you're not good enough for my daughter. That's all there is to it." I grabbed Jonathan's hand and dragged him out of the house in the huff. He never got past the foyer.
Jonathan and I walked a few blocks to the park, and sat on a bench as I cried. The way sheltered 21-year-old girls do when their parents humiliate and frustrate them. Jonathan put all his energy into comforting me, and telling me it didn't matter, but I knew he was just as upset as I was, though he'd never show it. At least not until after he asked my father for my hand in marriage, and ended up punching him in the nose, but that's a story for another time.
Truthfully I've always suspected my mother was secretly attracted to him, because who wouldn't be? I'm the envy of every woman I know.