Just need to let off some steam.
This year is definitely going to tough starting off. Where is my life going? Am I good at what I do? Should I try going for a different career? Should I give up?
Last year I finally broke into the Entertainment industry doing Stereoscopic 3D compositing, and got to work on Transformers 3 and Smurfs. I really enjoyed it, but it is tough and brand new. When the company did layoffs so many people went to a company in LA. I tried applying for a position up there too, but I didn't get it. My fear is: people from the previous job didn't like me, I wasn't a good canidate, or something else. Some of them have been extremely lucky. I mean extremely. I did some freelance at a small studio for 2 weeks, got let go, but others got to stay on before the job was cancelled by the client. Some of those people got to go to the big studio in LA. Why not me? Am I not good enough? Did people really not like me? I did nothing wrong, and I always worked as hard as I could.
I've been applying to every Stereoscopic job I can find. I've even branched to production assistant and Coordinator. I wouldn't mind those jobs. I think they would be fun and definitely something new. But nothing, not even a reply. I know times are tough, I do.
Because nothing has come up I have to say goodbye to my apartment in San Diego. I love that place so much, but without money I can't keep it. So I have to move back home and things are getting really intense. My parents just want me to get a job so I can make money which means a retail job again. They say they believe that I'm talented, but my fear is that once I go back to retail the entertainment industry won't consider me as a potential employee, or that I'm not serious about it. There have been fights that have broken out at home because of different beliefs. My mom wants us to see a family counselor. I really don't think it will do much good. I know things will get better once I get a job and move out. It just sucks, my parents don't have any connections to the entertainment industry absolutely none.
Ugh, I just don't know what to do and I'm running out of options... I feel like I'm losing my freedom, and if I don't keep striving for what I want so badly and change courses it will never happen. I just want to be a part of something greater, even if that means I have to scrub toilets for a studio. I just don't want to give up. I just keep hoping and praying someone will notice me and give me a chance like my last job did. I know I'm not the only one suffering, I do know others who are struggling to find jobs too. My own happiness is at stake. I just wish I had someone to tell me, "Hey, you are amazing and you will find something you will. Don't let your parents get you down. Things will get better."
I feel like a flower without sunshine...
Last year I finally broke into the Entertainment industry doing Stereoscopic 3D compositing, and got to work on Transformers 3 and Smurfs. I really enjoyed it, but it is tough and brand new. When the company did layoffs so many people went to a company in LA. I tried applying for a position up there too, but I didn't get it. My fear is: people from the previous job didn't like me, I wasn't a good canidate, or something else. Some of them have been extremely lucky. I mean extremely. I did some freelance at a small studio for 2 weeks, got let go, but others got to stay on before the job was cancelled by the client. Some of those people got to go to the big studio in LA. Why not me? Am I not good enough? Did people really not like me? I did nothing wrong, and I always worked as hard as I could.
I've been applying to every Stereoscopic job I can find. I've even branched to production assistant and Coordinator. I wouldn't mind those jobs. I think they would be fun and definitely something new. But nothing, not even a reply. I know times are tough, I do.
Because nothing has come up I have to say goodbye to my apartment in San Diego. I love that place so much, but without money I can't keep it. So I have to move back home and things are getting really intense. My parents just want me to get a job so I can make money which means a retail job again. They say they believe that I'm talented, but my fear is that once I go back to retail the entertainment industry won't consider me as a potential employee, or that I'm not serious about it. There have been fights that have broken out at home because of different beliefs. My mom wants us to see a family counselor. I really don't think it will do much good. I know things will get better once I get a job and move out. It just sucks, my parents don't have any connections to the entertainment industry absolutely none.
Ugh, I just don't know what to do and I'm running out of options... I feel like I'm losing my freedom, and if I don't keep striving for what I want so badly and change courses it will never happen. I just want to be a part of something greater, even if that means I have to scrub toilets for a studio. I just don't want to give up. I just keep hoping and praying someone will notice me and give me a chance like my last job did. I know I'm not the only one suffering, I do know others who are struggling to find jobs too. My own happiness is at stake. I just wish I had someone to tell me, "Hey, you are amazing and you will find something you will. Don't let your parents get you down. Things will get better."
I feel like a flower without sunshine...