Divination

[fera_festiva]

Seeing as the release of Harry Potter and the Temple of Doom is just around the corner - less than three months according to hp-lexicon.org, bloody hell - I've put together a list of my speculations and predictions for the book. Some I think are almost inevitable; others are completely ridiculous; some are so general that they're almost horoscopes. They are utterly based on opinion - I wouldn't go putting on any bets based on these, bear in mind that I was absolutely one hundred per cent certain that Remus Lupin would die in book six - but nevertheless, here they are. I reserve the right to be horribly embarrassed by this entry and delete it post-Deathly Hallows, or (less likely) crow about how I totally called [whatever I called].



Predictions falling somewhere between realistic, pessimistic, and downright cynical

• Harry dies but comes back to life or some variation thereof.
  - I know JKR said that nobody comes back from the dead in her universe, but nobody's supposed to survive Avada Kedavra either. Also, JKR mentioned at one stage that anyone who knew their Christian mythology would probably see what was coming. (Nope, don't have sources for either of those. I'm sure they're on Quick Quote Quill, but I can't find them, though not for lack of trying. Damn intarwebs.) Anyway, despite my growing disillusionment with the canon, I can't bring myself to believe JKR would end things in a way that could possibly be described as simple.
  
  So. This will involve going through the Veil (since only Voldemort can kill Harry, therefore according to logic he can't kill himself); or, Harry locking Voldemort into some kind of stalemate; or - most likely? - Harry sacrificing himself for those he loves, as Lily did for him, since he has the power of love (by which I mean the literal power of actual love, not the 1984 song by Frankie Goes to Hollywood or, indeed, the album by Harry and the Potters).
  
  
• Irritating characters, such as Dobby, Hagrid and Grawp, have a significant part to play in the downfall of Voldemort.
  - Like how the Ewoks are really important in Return of the Jedi.
  
  
• Voldemort has a downfall.
  - Dead cert, I reckon, if only because his survival raises far too many questions. I'm not saying I definitely think he'll die, though.
  
  
• Harry's scar isn't a scar.
  - Or it isn't only a scar.
  
  
• More than two people die.
  - Every news article I see regarding this book seems to note somewhere that JKR gave one character a reprieve, and killed two she hadn't originally planned to (again, I can't actually find a reference for this, making me the world's worst academic, although I did find a note on Mugglenet that at least one will die). I read this as meaning that those two will die on top of all the other deaths. I think only two would be a bit meagre for a book about a war, anyway.
  
  
• Harry and Mary Sue er, MJ Ginny get back together.
  
  
• Remus and Tonks get married and have a bunch of baaaaaaabies.
  
  
• I will let out a wilhelm scream and/or throw the book across the room during the time I spend reading the bloody book.
  

Optimistic predictions, wishlist predictions

• Remus and Tonks split up/it is revealed that they were never together.
  - When I'm feeling really optimistic, this is because one or both of them are gay (if I'm feeling so-optimistic-I'm-walking-on-sunshine I think it's because Remus and Sirius were a couple, but I am never that optimistic), and/or because Tonks was under the influence of some curse, or was being impersonated. A girl can dream, right?
  
  
• Good and evil are shown to exist only as relative truths and in shades of grey.
  - Snape won't be on the "good side", because he is "good", or the "bad side", because he is "bad". He'll be given complexity and reasons for having acted in the ways he has. See also the Dursleys and Draco Malfoy and, on the flipside, Fred and George Weasley. (I'm really setting myself up for a fall, I fear...)
  
  
• Luna and Neville have things work out OK for them.
  - Not necessarily as a couple or anything like that. I just like them, I think they're alright. I'd like them to come out the other side relatively unscathed.
  
  
• My faith in JKR will be restored.
  

Stuff I dreamed, came up with when drunk, or just think would be killer or pretty cool

• Nazi cyborg assassins from the future have a part to play in the ending.
  
  
• Arthur Weasley starts calling himself "Art" in order to appear cooler (he fails).
  
  
• In Real Life, the following things happened in the year July 1997 - July 1998 (which will presumably be covered by this book). Perhaps they will be important?
  
  • Prince Lukas and Prince Boris of Bulgaria are born. Could they have some link with Krum and other Eastern European wizards?
    
  • Smoking in bars and restaurants is banned across California. Could this be a plot by Death Eaters to undermine phoenixes?
    
  • In the movie Back to the Future Part II (what? It's real), Marty McFly jr is born. Could this have something to do with time-turners?
    
  • Howard Stern's stalker goes to prison. Could he have been a Death Eater?
    
  • A bunch of people are attacked by monkeys in Ito, Japan. Could the monkeys be Death Eaters?
    
  • George Michael is apprehended in a public toilet... by Death Eaters!
    
  • Microsoft releases Windows 98. This is totally the work of Death Eaters!
    
  • This is stupid.
    
  • Er...
    
  • That's it.