Just don't know
At least I can admit that, that I have no idea what is going on in my life. I have to say we are good at falling into patterns. It is easy to play house. And if you were looking in, you would have to say that we look like the average happy couple. I am also a theatre major, so looks can be deceiving. I mean I do think we are happy, but the pessimest in me is wondering when it is all going to fall apart. I should just enjoy the moment, and for the most part I am. Why worry about tomorrow when you have to live today. Being that I believe everything happens for a reason and there are no mistakes, just different roads taken, how can I worry. It is all out of my hands for the most part. I can't but help wonder what being in love should feel like. I have heard all these theories but I can't say I have ever allowed myself to feel any of those things. I have always been to practical for all that stuff. I have always made the choice to persue a relationship, I never just let it happen. And the more I try to make him love me, the more I think, wow, so this is what it is like, what Justin must of felt. No matter what he did I just never could love him like he loved me.