a state of settlement...
I was talking to a friend of mine from highschool who recently got married. I asked him how he was liking it and he told me that he really likes just being settled. This suprised me because if you would have met this guy a couple years back you would have never imagined him as an advocate of mongamy. I remember we used to have this joke about how the gay community in Green Bay was like a big web and they were all connected by at least 3 degrees of separation, and this guy was close to being the center of the so called "slut circle".
But I told him that I got it, I knew that he was only sleeping around and doing all those things because he was desperately looking for something, for someone to make him feel less empty. Its funny because the people we think are the most passe about things are often the most vunerable. The middle of a large social circle is often the most lonely place unless you have some real friends with substance.
I guess thats what we are all looking for is somone who we can just settle down with. And I don't mean that in the sense that we all want to get married and have kids and buy the split level in the suburbs with a white picket fence. I just mean that when you find the right person, going out all the time doesn't seem so important. You feel less restless, and having that glamorous social life isn't such a priorty.
I can only speak from my own experience, but I remember that there were times where I would start feeling claustrophobic if I spent a whole day in my apartment. I felt like the day was a waste if I didn't go out or hang out with someone. Now I feel more calm about being alone. Maybe because I know there is someone who loves me, who's thinking about me, even if they are not physically there. And I know my friends love me and care about me, but its not with that same intensity. Friends help, but having Dave just makes me feel a lot more whole. When you have someone who just gets you, and accepts you, and loves you for who you are, you don't feel the urgency to go out and try to connect to someone else; you can just be content with spending a night at home by yourself.
Maybe thats just me...
This weekend was very lowkey. I ran some errands on Saturday and made dinner and watched a DVD and I loved it. I'm far from that suburban cliche but I definitely enjoy being in a little bit more settled state of mind.
But I told him that I got it, I knew that he was only sleeping around and doing all those things because he was desperately looking for something, for someone to make him feel less empty. Its funny because the people we think are the most passe about things are often the most vunerable. The middle of a large social circle is often the most lonely place unless you have some real friends with substance.
I guess thats what we are all looking for is somone who we can just settle down with. And I don't mean that in the sense that we all want to get married and have kids and buy the split level in the suburbs with a white picket fence. I just mean that when you find the right person, going out all the time doesn't seem so important. You feel less restless, and having that glamorous social life isn't such a priorty.
I can only speak from my own experience, but I remember that there were times where I would start feeling claustrophobic if I spent a whole day in my apartment. I felt like the day was a waste if I didn't go out or hang out with someone. Now I feel more calm about being alone. Maybe because I know there is someone who loves me, who's thinking about me, even if they are not physically there. And I know my friends love me and care about me, but its not with that same intensity. Friends help, but having Dave just makes me feel a lot more whole. When you have someone who just gets you, and accepts you, and loves you for who you are, you don't feel the urgency to go out and try to connect to someone else; you can just be content with spending a night at home by yourself.
Maybe thats just me...
This weekend was very lowkey. I ran some errands on Saturday and made dinner and watched a DVD and I loved it. I'm far from that suburban cliche but I definitely enjoy being in a little bit more settled state of mind.