[FIC] A Cow Dillema for gw500
Written for
gw500 prompt 215 - abduction
Title: A Cow DillemaPairing/Characters: slight 2+1
Rating: PG-13/R for swearing and sexual innuendo
Warnings/Kinks: Talks of Cow Abuse and anal probing. silliness and not beta read.
Duo's car broke in the middle of fucking nowhere. He kicked one of the wheels, "Fuck! My car broke in the middle of fucking nowhere!" he agreed with the narrator, then went to look under the hood. For a time curses could be heard coming from there, and then Duo reappeared, "It's no use. I have to wait for help, or walk back to the town in the morning." Duo sat on top of the now closed hood, and waited. After an hour or two it got dark, and he decided to maybe lay down in the back seat and have some sleep. Then a loud noise could be herd in the distance, moving closer. Duo went to stand in the middle of the road, squinting his eyes and trying to see the oncoming car. Suddenly, a bright light surrounded him, and he felt himself being sucked upward, then it felt as if something was trying to push him through a silicone tube, that was slightly too small to fit him. Then the light and feeling were gone, and he was dumped on his ass in the middle of a strange room, "What the..."
"Did we succeed?" asked a voice somewhere beside him.
"We did catch something." said another.
"But is it a cow? Did we catch a cow?" asked a third voice.
"We will have to check it. See if it can produce." another voice sounded, and a strange boy/man walked near to him, with a long, rectangular object in his hand.
"Hey!" Duo jumped up, and started backing away from him, "Keep that thing away prom me! I know you aliens and your kink with anal probing, but not this time mister!"
"Anal probing? No, that's what those freaks from Alpha-2 do. They say it's healthy." said the boy, he's black eyes frowning.
"The hell it is!" Duo backed away some more, and bumped into someone. He turned and saw a blond boy with innocent eyes looking at him. He would have looked normal, if not for the two, green antennas on his head, "Are you a cow?"
"What?" Duo blinked at him, "No. I'm not a cow. I'm a human."
"At least he's not as hairy as the last one." said the boy with the strange object, that was now passing near Duo, and beeping. The boy pointed with his other hand to the cages, where a goat, a cat, some chickens, a monkey and a lion could be seen. There was another boy near the lion cage. He had brown hair, falling over one eye, but he had only one antenna, "Maybe he can tell us how to get a cow."
"Can you?" asked the blond.
"Sure, but why do you guys need a cow anyway?"
"That is irrelevant. Show us a cow." said the last boy, with a mop of tousled brown hair. Duo thought he looked rather cute, and he wouldn't mind being 'anal probed' by him.
"I won't show you a cow before I know what you need it for."
"They are said to produce a white substance that proved to be the best shuttle fuel so far. We need a cow, so it can produce it for our planet."
"Yeah, we have our own planet!" interrupted the blond, and the cutie glared at him.
"Sheesh... and here I thought you wanted to do some strange sexual experiments on it."
"'Sexual experiments'? What is that?" asked the guy with the one antenna.
"You guys don't know what sex is?! Geeez... I have so much to teach you! Ok, let me show you a cow for now." And he followed the cute guy in a black, form-fitting spacesuit, to the control room, ogling his butt the whole time.
Owari?
gw500 prompt 215 - abduction
Title: A Cow DillemaPairing/Characters: slight 2+1
Rating: PG-13/R for swearing and sexual innuendo
Warnings/Kinks: Talks of Cow Abuse and anal probing. silliness and not beta read.
Duo's car broke in the middle of fucking nowhere. He kicked one of the wheels, "Fuck! My car broke in the middle of fucking nowhere!" he agreed with the narrator, then went to look under the hood. For a time curses could be heard coming from there, and then Duo reappeared, "It's no use. I have to wait for help, or walk back to the town in the morning." Duo sat on top of the now closed hood, and waited. After an hour or two it got dark, and he decided to maybe lay down in the back seat and have some sleep. Then a loud noise could be herd in the distance, moving closer. Duo went to stand in the middle of the road, squinting his eyes and trying to see the oncoming car. Suddenly, a bright light surrounded him, and he felt himself being sucked upward, then it felt as if something was trying to push him through a silicone tube, that was slightly too small to fit him. Then the light and feeling were gone, and he was dumped on his ass in the middle of a strange room, "What the..."
"Did we succeed?" asked a voice somewhere beside him.
"We did catch something." said another.
"But is it a cow? Did we catch a cow?" asked a third voice.
"We will have to check it. See if it can produce." another voice sounded, and a strange boy/man walked near to him, with a long, rectangular object in his hand.
"Hey!" Duo jumped up, and started backing away from him, "Keep that thing away prom me! I know you aliens and your kink with anal probing, but not this time mister!"
"Anal probing? No, that's what those freaks from Alpha-2 do. They say it's healthy." said the boy, he's black eyes frowning.
"The hell it is!" Duo backed away some more, and bumped into someone. He turned and saw a blond boy with innocent eyes looking at him. He would have looked normal, if not for the two, green antennas on his head, "Are you a cow?"
"What?" Duo blinked at him, "No. I'm not a cow. I'm a human."
"At least he's not as hairy as the last one." said the boy with the strange object, that was now passing near Duo, and beeping. The boy pointed with his other hand to the cages, where a goat, a cat, some chickens, a monkey and a lion could be seen. There was another boy near the lion cage. He had brown hair, falling over one eye, but he had only one antenna, "Maybe he can tell us how to get a cow."
"Can you?" asked the blond.
"Sure, but why do you guys need a cow anyway?"
"That is irrelevant. Show us a cow." said the last boy, with a mop of tousled brown hair. Duo thought he looked rather cute, and he wouldn't mind being 'anal probed' by him.
"I won't show you a cow before I know what you need it for."
"They are said to produce a white substance that proved to be the best shuttle fuel so far. We need a cow, so it can produce it for our planet."
"Yeah, we have our own planet!" interrupted the blond, and the cutie glared at him.
"Sheesh... and here I thought you wanted to do some strange sexual experiments on it."
"'Sexual experiments'? What is that?" asked the guy with the one antenna.
"You guys don't know what sex is?! Geeez... I have so much to teach you! Ok, let me show you a cow for now." And he followed the cute guy in a black, form-fitting spacesuit, to the control room, ogling his butt the whole time.
Owari?