Just an update
Cranky.
That's me. Today, yesterday, Monday...cranky.
This is stress. I can recognize. It's me having stress over exams. I'm not worried, I'm not particularly anxious...but I feel like I should be, and it's making me cranky. The presumption, the expectation that I should be panicking...it's like having peer pressure to be scared.
Which...I'm not...until I start thinking about the fact that I'm not...which terrifies me. I worry that maybe I'm not scared because being a lazy student has always put me a head above the competition. I worry that my confidence is misplaced, or that my seemingly zen attitude towards the outcome of exams is really just a sign of pending depression.
Or apocalypse...maybe I'm not stressed about finals because I know in my soul that Buffy can't keep this up. What will we need lawyers for once civilization as we know it is over.
I jest.
Or, I'm telling you I'm jesting so you won't buy up all the canned food.
Your call.
Regardless...I feel...isolated. Like, I can't get on the worry train with my classmates, but I'm too grumpy about it to socialize with civilians.
Note: "Civilians" in this context refers to the fact that some of you folks who *aren't* law students are remaining somewhat civil and even civilized. The stress of inadequate resources has turned the lot around here (and by "here" I mean school) into raving, volatile stress balls.
So...yeah...I don't write for months, then you get angst. Sorry.
Oooh...now I can have some guilt, too.
So...snow...
And ice...
And they canceled school yesterday, and the power went out on Sunday (BIG fun...couldn't get the car out of the garage, 'cause the garage door is electric...so I had to borrow my friend's roommate's car...it was this whole airport thing), and I know y'all back in Chicago et all are sitting there thinking: "Snow? That's not snow. THIS is SNOW."
And I'm thinking: "Yeah...1-6 inches...that's really not snow..."
But being back, I'm reminded...
One doesn't need much snow...hell, one doesn't need ANY snow to really get fucked up when driving.
What one needs is a little moisture, one cold night, and HILLS!
What y'all in the midwest lack, in order to understand the terror that strikes the the hearts of west-coasters at the sight of a 31 degree thermostat is anything like a grade.
You'd be amazed what a 20 degree angle can do when it's covered by a thin layer of ice which is, in turn, covered by a thin layer of snow. I'm just saying.
So...we're expecting more tonight...more snow, more ice...sleet and rain tomorrow...I bet that if I got a good running start, I could just slide all the way to school.
That's me. Today, yesterday, Monday...cranky.
This is stress. I can recognize. It's me having stress over exams. I'm not worried, I'm not particularly anxious...but I feel like I should be, and it's making me cranky. The presumption, the expectation that I should be panicking...it's like having peer pressure to be scared.
Which...I'm not...until I start thinking about the fact that I'm not...which terrifies me. I worry that maybe I'm not scared because being a lazy student has always put me a head above the competition. I worry that my confidence is misplaced, or that my seemingly zen attitude towards the outcome of exams is really just a sign of pending depression.
Or apocalypse...maybe I'm not stressed about finals because I know in my soul that Buffy can't keep this up. What will we need lawyers for once civilization as we know it is over.
I jest.
Or, I'm telling you I'm jesting so you won't buy up all the canned food.
Your call.
Regardless...I feel...isolated. Like, I can't get on the worry train with my classmates, but I'm too grumpy about it to socialize with civilians.
Note: "Civilians" in this context refers to the fact that some of you folks who *aren't* law students are remaining somewhat civil and even civilized. The stress of inadequate resources has turned the lot around here (and by "here" I mean school) into raving, volatile stress balls.
So...yeah...I don't write for months, then you get angst. Sorry.
Oooh...now I can have some guilt, too.
So...snow...
And ice...
And they canceled school yesterday, and the power went out on Sunday (BIG fun...couldn't get the car out of the garage, 'cause the garage door is electric...so I had to borrow my friend's roommate's car...it was this whole airport thing), and I know y'all back in Chicago et all are sitting there thinking: "Snow? That's not snow. THIS is SNOW."
And I'm thinking: "Yeah...1-6 inches...that's really not snow..."
But being back, I'm reminded...
One doesn't need much snow...hell, one doesn't need ANY snow to really get fucked up when driving.
What one needs is a little moisture, one cold night, and HILLS!
What y'all in the midwest lack, in order to understand the terror that strikes the the hearts of west-coasters at the sight of a 31 degree thermostat is anything like a grade.
You'd be amazed what a 20 degree angle can do when it's covered by a thin layer of ice which is, in turn, covered by a thin layer of snow. I'm just saying.
So...we're expecting more tonight...more snow, more ice...sleet and rain tomorrow...I bet that if I got a good running start, I could just slide all the way to school.