the world and other places
i could easily write the essay about him because he is unquestionably the one.... the person who has influenced me the most. he's made me a better person, made me push myself and helped me find my limits and been there to help me through the very worst of it. and yet at the same time i feel so disconnected from him, as though i'm just watching his world, looking into it as though he were one of those damned reality shows...
today at starbucks i saw chris, and somehow we got to talking about, of all things, college recommendations.... and chris casually mentioned that sara connolly got this amazing recommendation from him and that he'd taken her out to dinner and shared it with her... i got one of those gross, pit of the stomach feelings... probably stemming from the knowledge that if there ever was a student he saw as more than that, it's her and not me and i can't make him feel as intensely about me as i do about him. some people are just special... and sara is special to him, as he is special to me.
it's time that i stopped this nonsense, stopped acting like an idiot around him and started being the person that i can be with anyone else....
today at starbucks i saw chris, and somehow we got to talking about, of all things, college recommendations.... and chris casually mentioned that sara connolly got this amazing recommendation from him and that he'd taken her out to dinner and shared it with her... i got one of those gross, pit of the stomach feelings... probably stemming from the knowledge that if there ever was a student he saw as more than that, it's her and not me and i can't make him feel as intensely about me as i do about him. some people are just special... and sara is special to him, as he is special to me.
it's time that i stopped this nonsense, stopped acting like an idiot around him and started being the person that i can be with anyone else....