Reading "Stay" - Accidental Fanmail to Anaross (and a Ficlet)

[feliciacraft]

I was leaving a heart-felt but polite, not to mention brief review for anaross’s “Stay” on EF or AO3 like a normal person when all of a sudden, this began to pour out. And out. And out. In the interest of self healing, I’ve decided to unstopper this repressed memory and release it from the bottle. Because it would be way too embarrassing to post half of

Comments

Bernal Heights

[anaross]

I've actually only been to Bernal Heights twice, once before and once after writing this, and when I went back, I couldn't even find the park that I remembered so well! So it might be a sort of Brigadoon park, there only for that one day I visited. I have this vision of a long sloping stretch of grass, houses all around.

But it seems not to exist, except in my memory! I can see it quite clearly... oh, well. It's an alternate universe Bernal Heights. :)

I think in a weird way, Stay equalizes that balance. They're always in rough balance, or trying to achieve it, and Buffy has had to survive Spike's death in many fics. In Stay, he survives hers. What happens to deathless love when someone dies? It's still there.

Anyway, I love your version. I have never been able to imagine Buffy happy with anyone but Spike (and anything but happy- eventually- with Spike). So your story feels very true-- if she'd survived, they would stay together. I know!

Re: Bernal Heights

[feliciacraft]

Excuse me while I jump up and down in a corner being all fangirlish, but in a dignified fashion

Re: Bernal Heights

[anaross]

Hmm. That does sort of look like I remember, and it's not on the very top of the hill (I remembered/imagined it not at the top). I was just in Holly Park last year, and remember the view, which is pretty amazing. I really wanted to live there, but, well, Spike and Buffy's duplex (the only side-by-side one in SF! Made for them!) isn't available

Re: Bernal Heights

[feliciacraft]

Yeah, IMO Buffy and Angel are just not a great fit. Both are take-charge, larger-than-life characters. Buffy is self-centered and self-righteous (being the "Chosen One" and all), and Angel is newly awakened on his path of redemption, and patronizing. Buffy would like to be treated as an equal, whereas Angel would prefer to assume the role of the protector or keep Buffy on a pedestal. Both have problems communicating: Buffy is prone to withholding love and into self denial, Angel is broody and mysterious. And that's without the tension of the whole precariously-anchored soul business between them

Re: Bernal Heights

[anaross]

Yes, they would fight, but it wouldn't destroy them. Part of who they are is fighters. It would never be the end. I was just thinking about how they could spend an evening as you have it, just content to be together, not having to TRY. And while they can't read each other's mind, they know each other so well. Mystery has its appeal, but they wouldn't do that Bangel thing where they are afraid to talk openly. They do. And then they go on together.

I'm inspired! :)

Re: Bernal Heights

[anaross]

And this is it exactly:
>Almost like a normal couple, but without trying too hard.

Re: Bernal Heights

[feliciacraft]

I would LOVE to read a story of Spike and Buffy spending an evening together, especially from you

Re: Bernal Heights

[anaross]

Well, that's it, isn't it-- for her, "normal" is a gift. How wonderful to just do normal things.

And as for "wise," well, if being able to accept "incredibly hot guy who adores you" into your life is wise, yes, Buffy is FINALLY wise!
It is interesting how those who live in great excitement are the ones who end up most content with "normal".

Re: Bernal Heights

[feliciacraft]

Well, I have a S5 Buffy that accepts Spike following the end of "Intervention", and between then and her fatal leap off of Glory's tower, first inducts him into the Scooby gang, then consummates her relationship with him. But it's not as simple as accepting an "incredibly hot guy who adores you". That guy happens to be a soulless vampire who has repeatedly gone after her life, her friends. Even a truce, let alone a budding romance, would go against Council indoctrination of vampires being nothing more than demons that take over the physical shells of the people they kill, and that a soul is a prerequisite for love and morality and all that jazz. And that is without bringing in the history of her disastrous affair with Angel/Angelus

Re: Bernal Heights

[anaross]

That's why I only write S6 and after-- once she's already overcome her squickiness. I don't know how to deal with her before that.