Sad.
I have a very dear friend, Amanda, that I'm thinking of today. We met when we were ten years old, taking dance classes together. Her mom Helen became like a surrogate mom to me. I will never forget the time that I got into a fistfight with Amy Teague, who totally outweighed me. She sat ontop of me and pulled out my hair. I ran "home" to Helen's house, wailing the whole time about how she had pulled out all of my gorgeous hair. *laughs* Amanda walked in and said, "Missa, are you alright? We drove by Main street, and we saw you and all this blonde hair flyin everywhere!" Helen got a brush and started brushing through my hair, while I said every cuss word I could think of. By the end of the night, they had laughed so hard they had stomach cramps. Bitches. LOL
Amanda was pregnant with twin girls. She's had four miscarriages before she got pregnant. She almost hemmorhged to death the last time. I was so worried when she told me she was pregnant with twins. It was too soon, I thought. But I was happy for her, because she wanted another child so bad. She went into labor last week, three and a half months early. Everything looked good. And then Helen called me this morning. Manda's girl, Lilly, had passed away this morning. Amanda got on the phone, and we both pretended everything was fine, and then we both just...started sobbing. I can only imagine what it must feel like to loose your child, after you thought she was going to be ok. The girls had come down with an infection. Abby responded well, Lilly didn't. I'm angry. I'm angry that a child so young didn't get a fighting chance. It's not fair, and one person shouldn't have to suffer so much. When I told her I was coming up to be with her, the relief that flooded her voice made me feel so much guilt that I wasn't there now. I leave next week. It's going to be a really shitty week.
Amanda was pregnant with twin girls. She's had four miscarriages before she got pregnant. She almost hemmorhged to death the last time. I was so worried when she told me she was pregnant with twins. It was too soon, I thought. But I was happy for her, because she wanted another child so bad. She went into labor last week, three and a half months early. Everything looked good. And then Helen called me this morning. Manda's girl, Lilly, had passed away this morning. Amanda got on the phone, and we both pretended everything was fine, and then we both just...started sobbing. I can only imagine what it must feel like to loose your child, after you thought she was going to be ok. The girls had come down with an infection. Abby responded well, Lilly didn't. I'm angry. I'm angry that a child so young didn't get a fighting chance. It's not fair, and one person shouldn't have to suffer so much. When I told her I was coming up to be with her, the relief that flooded her voice made me feel so much guilt that I wasn't there now. I leave next week. It's going to be a really shitty week.