(Untitled)

[feelgoodmerc]

:D

Comments

[grayfirefly]

I take it that you are well, then, Zack?

[feelgoodmerc]

LUCCI! ♥

I'm very very well! And yourself~? :D

[grayfirefly]

I am, thank you. Lord Dio was talking about coming to visit you the other day. Would that be alright with you?

[feelgoodmerc]

That's good! And really? Man, I'd love to see you guys. ^__^! How is Dio anyways?

[grayfirefly]

He is happier than ever, I believe. For a noble, the middle layer suits him well.

[feelgoodmerc]

That's really awesome. I'm really, really happy you guys are doing well.

And how about you? Are you enjoying yourself down there?

[grayfirefly]

Thank you, Zack.

It is... different, but I have mostly adjusted. We... I have more freedom. It's something I was not accustommed to.

[feelgoodmerc]

Of course. :)

Have you thought on what I spoke to you about way back when? About friendship and the like? Since you're more free than before and all.

[grayfirefly]

I have. But thinking about something, and doing it are two entirely different things. And besides, I... nevermind.

[feelgoodmerc]

Yeah, but even considering it is the first, major step to take. I'm happy you've thought on it.

You what?

Private to Zack

[grayfirefly]

I suppose.

But I... I have complicated feelings, I think. That I shouldn't have. That are inappropriate for someone of my station to have for someone like Lord Dio.

Private to Lucciola

[feelgoodmerc]

Ah. Love.

Y'know what though? Its not inappropriate. You're both, well, the same, in a way. No, maybe not social-status wise, but really? That doesn't matter.

Nothing can really come inbetween feelings, no matter how much you'd like to shove it away and say its not right it'll just come back again and again. And if you try and ignore it it'll probably just haunt you, sadly.

Though believe me when I say I have kinda the same problem, so I understand completely.

[ooc: Oh gawd. You got him rambling. DX]

Private to Lucciola

[grayfirefly]

I have realized that, especially lately. It is difficult for me to look beyond our social titles. That is the way it has always been. I was given to him when we were young. He is the master and I am the servant.

And. I doubt that Lord Dio returns these... feelings of mine. If I reveal them, he might rid himself of me. And I couldn't bear that.

You... you do?

[ooc: Lucciola doesn't mind! ♥ He needs all the help he can get XD]

Private to Lucciola

[feelgoodmerc]

I know, but if you think about it that way for the rest of your life, I don't think you'll get anywhere with that in mind. But its okay, it takes time for these things. Just keep thinking about what it would be like if you didn't have those titles weighed so heavily on your guyses shoulders.

I'd say 'you never know until you try', but again, I'm in a similar situation so I'd be a hypocrite saying that.

Absolutely.

Private to Zack

[grayfirefly]

I will try. The problem is mostly of my own creation. Lord Dio has never treated me like a servant, though he has every right to. He has always treated me as an... equal, a companion, a friend. But still. The fear of rejection is a powerful one.

It is at least comforting to know that someone else understands what I am feeling. Thank you, Zack.

Private to Lucciola

[feelgoodmerc]

Trying is all that matters. And rejection from someone you would give your life to, protect and all-around love? Yeah. I'd be crushed too if something like that happened. But think about it this way: if he's been so nice to you now and treated you as an equal, who says he won't treat you the same way after you tell him?

You're very welcome. :) I just wish we both had answers to our problems, but in due time everything will come together.