(no subject)
KRISTIN MANYAK: and others i guess haha.
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions, and will tell you
Whether you are qualified to be a professional. Scroll down for each
Answer. The questions are NOT that difficult. But don't scroll down
UNTIL you have answered the question!
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, And
close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple Things
in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close The
refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in The
elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through
The repercussions of your previous actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals
Attend.... Except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator.
You just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly,
you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross, but it is used by crocodiles, and
you Do not have a boat. How do you
manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not
been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the
professionals they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers
got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively
disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a
Four-year-old.
--------------------------------------
The Bathtub Test
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked
the director what the criteria was which defined
whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.
"Well," said the director, "We fill up a bathtub, then
we offer a teaspoon, a teacup And a bucket to the
patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person
would use the bucket, because it's bigger than the
spoon or the teacup."
"No." said the director, "A normal person would pull
the plug. Do you want a bed near the window"?
-------------------------------------------------
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was
severely burned.
The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his
body because he was too skinny.
So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin.
However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable
would have to come from her buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where
the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor
their secret.
After all, this was very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the
man's new face.
He looked more handsome than he ever had before!
All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!
One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion
at her sacrifice.
He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for
me. How can I possibly repay you?"
"My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I
see your mother kiss you on the cheek.
and these were just todays.
haha
love you alll..
read my shit niggaa..
or dont.
hah
oh.. both of the gold fish died haha. awsome.
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions, and will tell you
Whether you are qualified to be a professional. Scroll down for each
Answer. The questions are NOT that difficult. But don't scroll down
UNTIL you have answered the question!
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, And
close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple Things
in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close The
refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in The
elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through
The repercussions of your previous actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals
Attend.... Except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator.
You just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly,
you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross, but it is used by crocodiles, and
you Do not have a boat. How do you
manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not
been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the
professionals they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers
got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively
disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a
Four-year-old.
--------------------------------------
The Bathtub Test
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked
the director what the criteria was which defined
whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.
"Well," said the director, "We fill up a bathtub, then
we offer a teaspoon, a teacup And a bucket to the
patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person
would use the bucket, because it's bigger than the
spoon or the teacup."
"No." said the director, "A normal person would pull
the plug. Do you want a bed near the window"?
-------------------------------------------------
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was
severely burned.
The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his
body because he was too skinny.
So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin.
However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable
would have to come from her buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where
the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor
their secret.
After all, this was very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the
man's new face.
He looked more handsome than he ever had before!
All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!
One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion
at her sacrifice.
He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for
me. How can I possibly repay you?"
"My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I
see your mother kiss you on the cheek.
and these were just todays.
haha
love you alll..
read my shit niggaa..
or dont.
hah
oh.. both of the gold fish died haha. awsome.