World's Shortest

[feech]

The X-Files:

SCULLY: (Shouting into cell phone) Mulder! Mulder, listen
to me! You can't believe this because then my own fragile
belief system will crumble because you're not supporting
it! (Frowning at phone) He must be out of range.

House:

ANYONE IN THE CAST: You're an ass.

HOUSE: (twirling cane and EXITing) It's easier just to
admit that you want me.

Babylon 5:

GARIBALDI: You know, Commander, every year of my life, I
become more and more convinced that the wisest and the
best is to focus our attention on the good and the
beautiful, if we just take the time to look at it.

SINCLAIR: You're some guy, Garibaldi.

Firefly:

MALCOLM REYNOLDS: Slash partner rotation will be posted
in the galley weekly next to the dishes schedule. And,
Simon, if I catch you in a bunk with two women on one
week again I'm partnering you with Jayne for two
rotations.

SIMON: Does my sister count as one of the women?

Bones:

BONES: Don't call me "Bones".

BOOTH: I didn't.

Six Feet Under:

Six Feet Under will not appear tonight due to
excessive functionality of the main characters.