Hill billy bollocks
The greatest pain in the world, the hardest thing a man can do, the most excruciating of trials any one person can experience is without a doubt, dragging yourself out of bed at 12:30pm after a great nights sleep in your massive comfy bed to haul your ass to a job you fucking despise. My word it really messes up your day when all you can think of is slamming your face into the pillow and spreading your stark naked body all over the place! And watching the politics show and bbc news 24 just adds the icing on the cake. So much did this piss me off that I contemplated just locking the door to the office at work today and falling asleep on the keyboard, but then i'd probably accidentaly order in about 500 cases of toys or something. Speaking of work, why does the scheduling manager always lump me on night shifts with the brain dead, drooling, un-washed, un-trained, british hill-billy fuckers. Every 20 seconds it was "Adam should I do this?" or "Adam, what do I do now?" or "Adam remember what I just asked you 2 minutes ago, well.... what do I do now?" One sure fire way to piss me off at work is to talk to me when i'm shovelling my gob with food, reading The Scotsman and occasionaly talking to Richard Whitely while he presents Countdown. Yes, I am the kind of person who, when alone, shouts the answers out at the tv.
But anyway, since i'm in a whatididoverthelastcoupleofdays kind of updating mood, I shall do just that. But before I start : THAT FUCKER WITH THE GUITAR AND THE ABILITY TO PLAY NO MORE THAN THE SAME FUCKING 5 SONGS OUTSIDE MY FLAT HAS GOT SOME CUNT TO SMASH A TAMBOURINE ABOUT AS WELL. Matt, hop in the car with your air rifle... please? Keep on Rocking In The Free World? Is my flat in some inexplicable Shite Timewarp or something? Deth! But yes, back to my update. Wednesday was an overall shite day, followed by what started out as a good night and also ended up shite. But hey, fuck it eh. I realise now its not worth worrying over. Nothing to do with me anymore, nothing I can do about it. Selfish people aren't worth the effort, the blood, the sweat of the tears. Liars aren't worth jack either, so essentialy, fuck 'em. But at least Drizzle was there to ply me with more whiskey. What a guy eh?! Thursday was a whooooole lot better. I didn't have to work, bonus. I wasn't drunk at any point, bonus. Me and Maggie had a pizza hut (Aside from the mopey waiter, bonus). We went to see Hostage as well, and gosh darn if I dont absolutely worship Bruce Willis. What a blindingly fantastic movie. The only gripe I could have was that long haired tosser, who of course could survive being shot and stabbed in the face and take out a team of highly trained mercs by himself. I mean, who couldn't?! God knows if I was pouring blood out from about 25 different wounds in my body I could still hang upside down out of vents and launch balls of flaming death through the air before eventually melting (What the fuck was that about?) Of course, by this time, my patented Willis fever set in, so we had to go and watch more Brucey boy. Of the many Bruce films I own, we decided on The Jackal. Also amazing. Does anybody else notice how often Bruce does his *gormless looking, slow motion head turn* move. I counted 5 in The Jackal, and i'm sure he does it a billion times in the Die Hard trilogy. Oooh it makes my knee's go weak. So overall Thursday was damn good.
Oh and I seem to have forgot I went to Liz's house on Tuesday as well. I dont know about anyone else, but I for one had a good time. And I now have a delightful 3rd nipple to show everyone who will even look. Matt shot me. Bastard. My revenge? Watching him nearly shit himself when I burst into the room with Liz's brothers fuck off air gun and point it right at his head. Dont worry though folks, it was un-loaded! I play happy :)
And heres one for all you Kirkliston Deth fans. A genuine photo of Adam R**a without a mask!!! This is bigger than the first pictures of Slipknot, this is bigger than the moon landings, this is bigger than the recent shooting of two buskers with a guitar and tambourine by an un-indentified man on Rose Street in Edinburgh!
He has such lovely eyes!
But anyway, since i'm in a whatididoverthelastcoupleofdays kind of updating mood, I shall do just that. But before I start : THAT FUCKER WITH THE GUITAR AND THE ABILITY TO PLAY NO MORE THAN THE SAME FUCKING 5 SONGS OUTSIDE MY FLAT HAS GOT SOME CUNT TO SMASH A TAMBOURINE ABOUT AS WELL. Matt, hop in the car with your air rifle... please? Keep on Rocking In The Free World? Is my flat in some inexplicable Shite Timewarp or something? Deth! But yes, back to my update. Wednesday was an overall shite day, followed by what started out as a good night and also ended up shite. But hey, fuck it eh. I realise now its not worth worrying over. Nothing to do with me anymore, nothing I can do about it. Selfish people aren't worth the effort, the blood, the sweat of the tears. Liars aren't worth jack either, so essentialy, fuck 'em. But at least Drizzle was there to ply me with more whiskey. What a guy eh?! Thursday was a whooooole lot better. I didn't have to work, bonus. I wasn't drunk at any point, bonus. Me and Maggie had a pizza hut (Aside from the mopey waiter, bonus). We went to see Hostage as well, and gosh darn if I dont absolutely worship Bruce Willis. What a blindingly fantastic movie. The only gripe I could have was that long haired tosser, who of course could survive being shot and stabbed in the face and take out a team of highly trained mercs by himself. I mean, who couldn't?! God knows if I was pouring blood out from about 25 different wounds in my body I could still hang upside down out of vents and launch balls of flaming death through the air before eventually melting (What the fuck was that about?) Of course, by this time, my patented Willis fever set in, so we had to go and watch more Brucey boy. Of the many Bruce films I own, we decided on The Jackal. Also amazing. Does anybody else notice how often Bruce does his *gormless looking, slow motion head turn* move. I counted 5 in The Jackal, and i'm sure he does it a billion times in the Die Hard trilogy. Oooh it makes my knee's go weak. So overall Thursday was damn good.
Oh and I seem to have forgot I went to Liz's house on Tuesday as well. I dont know about anyone else, but I for one had a good time. And I now have a delightful 3rd nipple to show everyone who will even look. Matt shot me. Bastard. My revenge? Watching him nearly shit himself when I burst into the room with Liz's brothers fuck off air gun and point it right at his head. Dont worry though folks, it was un-loaded! I play happy :)
And heres one for all you Kirkliston Deth fans. A genuine photo of Adam R**a without a mask!!! This is bigger than the first pictures of Slipknot, this is bigger than the moon landings, this is bigger than the recent shooting of two buskers with a guitar and tambourine by an un-indentified man on Rose Street in Edinburgh!
He has such lovely eyes!