(no subject)
This week has been descent, nothing good but nothing bad. This weekened will most likely suck bc i am forcing myself to lock up in my room and get to business on studying, but it will be worth it in the end.
school is almost out... 4 more days. It is amazing how fast your life passes you by. I wish i could take back this year, and start over. there are so many things that i regret doing, and so many things i regret NOT doing. But i guess thats how life works, you just get stronger from each mistake you make and hope for the best outcome...it all works out in the end for you whether you see it or not.
highschool is such a small part of your life, so i give up on all the "highschool drama" bc its not worth fretting about. just think, we have two more years left, then its over. we are all on our own. I dont know what i am going to do, my parents have already made it clear that i WILL be out of the house when i am 18, so there is something to look forward to.
I hate that i have screwed up alot of my relationships with friends. I shouldn't say some of the things I do, but then again, i have kept quiet about alot that i want to say. I do want people to know that i hate it when people expect me to be what they want me to be, hang out with people they want me to hang out, like people they want me to like*, do things they want to do, and constantly shut me down. im also talking about people in general... its nerveracking, but i know i dont have the guts to stand up to them, bc maybe in some cases they will be right and it will be for my own good, i know i dont see it now, but maybe one day i will, so thats why i wont stick up for myself.
CALEB YATES CAME OVER! then he just called me like 30 minutes after he left wanting to come over again, he wants to hang out with me bc "you are the coolest person ever!" nice. hes moving far away... i am going to miss him.
**My life's to do list:
1. fall in love (and not be afraid)
2. get married
3. graduate college successfully
4. help my brothers (find george)
5. talk to my mother (not a hi, small talk conversation, a deep talk about our past, what i remember, what im confused about, why she does the things she does. try to help her even though everyone says there is no ise and i will get hurt)
6. ...
this list will continue, this is just all that is on my mind.
I dont know why i told you this really, bc its not like you can help me achieve these things. I am just scarred of my future, of life itself really.
ONE SURVEY, JUST ONE, SO FILL OUT:
1.Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
33. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
34. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?
school is almost out... 4 more days. It is amazing how fast your life passes you by. I wish i could take back this year, and start over. there are so many things that i regret doing, and so many things i regret NOT doing. But i guess thats how life works, you just get stronger from each mistake you make and hope for the best outcome...it all works out in the end for you whether you see it or not.
highschool is such a small part of your life, so i give up on all the "highschool drama" bc its not worth fretting about. just think, we have two more years left, then its over. we are all on our own. I dont know what i am going to do, my parents have already made it clear that i WILL be out of the house when i am 18, so there is something to look forward to.
I hate that i have screwed up alot of my relationships with friends. I shouldn't say some of the things I do, but then again, i have kept quiet about alot that i want to say. I do want people to know that i hate it when people expect me to be what they want me to be, hang out with people they want me to hang out, like people they want me to like*, do things they want to do, and constantly shut me down. im also talking about people in general... its nerveracking, but i know i dont have the guts to stand up to them, bc maybe in some cases they will be right and it will be for my own good, i know i dont see it now, but maybe one day i will, so thats why i wont stick up for myself.
CALEB YATES CAME OVER! then he just called me like 30 minutes after he left wanting to come over again, he wants to hang out with me bc "you are the coolest person ever!" nice. hes moving far away... i am going to miss him.
**My life's to do list:
1. fall in love (and not be afraid)
2. get married
3. graduate college successfully
4. help my brothers (find george)
5. talk to my mother (not a hi, small talk conversation, a deep talk about our past, what i remember, what im confused about, why she does the things she does. try to help her even though everyone says there is no ise and i will get hurt)
6. ...
this list will continue, this is just all that is on my mind.
I dont know why i told you this really, bc its not like you can help me achieve these things. I am just scarred of my future, of life itself really.
ONE SURVEY, JUST ONE, SO FILL OUT:
1.Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
33. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
34. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?