Crappy Summer
Just kidding about my "fuck everyone!" post. I wanted to see how people would react -and everyone did in very interesting ways. Hmmm. Tell me about your mother. No, but actually you all should take a moment and look at how you reacted to my post -for most it really says a lot, if you ask me, about who you are or at least who you are in relationship to me... That's deep.
Anyway. Completely unrelated to my last post: I am having the crappiest Summer ever. I don't have a job, I'm in debt, and I feel like I am wasting my life by not really doing anything about it at the moment -why? I don't really know. Fuck. I can't get a job because I have too many trips that I have to go on this Summer -no one will take me part time. I just want someone to force me to come into work for 8 hours a day so that I can get paid to interact with people instead of staying up 'till 3 in the morning watching movies by myself in my room. Wow. Typing that sounds pathetic. And I'm fucking SICK of driving. All I've been doing is driving EVERYWHERE. No more driving. I mean, I want to see people and hang out all Summer long but I don't deserve to and I am not able to enjoy the tons of hanging out unless I'm bringing in the bread. My parents don't help, all they say is "get a job" and I say "I'm trying" and then they say "you're not trying hard enough" and then I say "shut the fuck up or I'll kill you!" and nobody wins.
So what can I do with what I have now? My plan is to start pushing to get a part time job doing tech theatre at Great America -I think they'd be the most flexible with my time needs. In the mean time I'm going to keep working for Dr. Bowler and I'm going to sell all the computer crap that has been growing in my closet. Maybe I really should turn in my aplication to the Apple store, too.
What is my problem? Am I lazy? Do I lack self discipline? Are my expectations too high? Why can't I ever get as much shit done as I want... EVER? I swore a lot in this entry... and in the last. I think I'm getting Taretts (sp?). Fuck you.
Anyway. Completely unrelated to my last post: I am having the crappiest Summer ever. I don't have a job, I'm in debt, and I feel like I am wasting my life by not really doing anything about it at the moment -why? I don't really know. Fuck. I can't get a job because I have too many trips that I have to go on this Summer -no one will take me part time. I just want someone to force me to come into work for 8 hours a day so that I can get paid to interact with people instead of staying up 'till 3 in the morning watching movies by myself in my room. Wow. Typing that sounds pathetic. And I'm fucking SICK of driving. All I've been doing is driving EVERYWHERE. No more driving. I mean, I want to see people and hang out all Summer long but I don't deserve to and I am not able to enjoy the tons of hanging out unless I'm bringing in the bread. My parents don't help, all they say is "get a job" and I say "I'm trying" and then they say "you're not trying hard enough" and then I say "shut the fuck up or I'll kill you!" and nobody wins.
So what can I do with what I have now? My plan is to start pushing to get a part time job doing tech theatre at Great America -I think they'd be the most flexible with my time needs. In the mean time I'm going to keep working for Dr. Bowler and I'm going to sell all the computer crap that has been growing in my closet. Maybe I really should turn in my aplication to the Apple store, too.
What is my problem? Am I lazy? Do I lack self discipline? Are my expectations too high? Why can't I ever get as much shit done as I want... EVER? I swore a lot in this entry... and in the last. I think I'm getting Taretts (sp?). Fuck you.