hyung, i think i shrunk leeteuk. (kangin/leeteuk)
Hyung, I think I shrunk Leeteuk
Kangin/Leeteuk, implied Siwon/Hankyung, Yesung/Ryeowook
R | Crack
In which Kangin decides that having sex with Leeteuk is better than ever.
Don't own 'em.
Birthday fic for Kangin, albeit a rather... retarded one. :D The idea of this fic has been bouncing around my head for weeks on end.
-
At first, Kangin doesn't notice anything wrong with the way his front feels cooler than it usually does in the morning.
Through hazy eyes, Kangin can make out someone small sized attempting to wake him up, shrill voice nagging at Kangin's ears. He blinks once, twice, and thinks, Leeteuk needs to eat more, he seems skinnier this morning... and then his brain finally kicks in.
"... Kangin, why the fuck have you grown so large?" Leeteuk demands when Kangin's eyes focus on him and he realizes -
"JESUS CHRIST WHY ARE YOU SO FUCKING SMAL - "
"DON'T USE THE LORD'S NAME AND - ... IN THE SAME SENTENCE, HYUNG!" The wall rattles angrily.
Kangin stares at the wall, then at Leeteuk, then back at the wall, and vaguely wonders what Siwon is doing in Hankyung's room at four in the morning. He decides he doesn't want to know.
Leeteuk starts whispering to him urgently this time round. "Kangin, it's not me, what did you drink last night? You know alcohol can't be trusted, someone might have... SOMEONE MIGHT HAVE PUT DRUGS IN YOUR DRINK AND MADE YOU GROW DOUBLE YOUR SIZE! KANGIN WHERE'S THE PHONE I NEEDTOCALLTHEAMBULANCENOW!"
The wall next to them rattles again, and this time it's Hankyung's perfectly enunciated swearing filtering through the thin wall, a beautiful lilt to the flow of his profanities, and Kangin is slightly disconcerted as to how Hankyung can make expletives sound like a poem.
It takes a full body Kangin bear hug and a pillow (and maybe handcuffs) to muffle out Leeteuk's surprisingly loud screams.
-
"WHERE'S LEETEUK-SSHI?" Their manager roars, tapping his foot impatiently on the floor, eyes flying from his watch to Kangin and to his clipboard. "WE HAVE TO LEA-"
Kangin steps in, and interrupts the manager. "He's still asleep," he says calmly. Heechul noticeably rolls his eyes and crosses his arms.
"WELL WAKE HIM UP, THEN!"
Kangin raises a finger to his lips and, casting a warning glare around the room to make sure no one follows suit, drags the manager to Leeteuk's room.
-
"Manager hyung!" Leeteuk bursts when the door opens. "Help!" He struggles against the ropes that bind him, kicking wildly against the bed post.
Their manager lets out a startled squeak and promptly drops to the floor.
It's silent, until Leeteuk glowers at Kangin and opens his (petite and very doll-like) mouth. "Just because you - and apparently everyone and everything else - have grown double in size doesn't mean you can tie me up to my own bed and keep me captive," he growls, almost fiercely, except for the fact that his voice is at least two octaves higher than it was yesterday, and his words come out sounding like a wind-up toy that four year old children buy from shops by the side of the road.
Kangin snorts. "You can't go to work looking like that," he says in a condescending tone of voice, as if Leeteuk was a seven year old which, judging by his current size, he could be.
Leeteuk opens his mouth, as if to retort back, but his words die on his tongue when the manager struggles up from the floor, gives Leeteuk a critical glance, and says sullenly, "I don't want to know what you did to him this time, Kangin. Thus you're in charge of taking care of Leeteuk today and returning him back to normal by tomorrow."
A million and one ideas pop into Kangin's mind of how he can use small!Leeteuk to his advantage, and he nods solemnly. "I will, hyung," he says.
Their manager shudders, looks at Leeteuk again, writes something down on his clipboard, and rushes out of the room as if he just saw a ghost.
-
A million and two questions, of course, hound Kangin when he emerges from Leeteuk's room, a small grin that screams 'victory' on his face, and a highly suspicious twinkle in his eyes.
"What did you do, fuck him too hard?" Heechul asks, smirking.
"Hyung!" Siwon tuts disapprovingly, eyebrows drawn together in a frown. "Don't use such vulgari -"
"Oh Siwonnie, all of us heard you last night," Heechul counters, and smiles smugly when said Shibrows shoot up into Siwon's hairline and do a little dance.
Hankyung and the manager go beet red in the face.
-
Sex with Leeteuk in his doll-like form, Kangin thinks lazily as he tries not to fuck Leeteuk's mouth, is the best thing God has ever created on Earth. Then he realizes that what he and Leeteuk are doing then are completely against all laws of nature, but he doesn - oh. Kangin's eyes roll slightly back when Leeteuk's small, deliciously wet mouth takes him whole.
Kangin revels in Leeteuk's shrieks, ear-splitting screams that echo in the empty dorm and magnifies the sensation of Leeteuk around him, tighter and hotter than ever befor - oh the friction; and as he pulls out and thrusts in again, the only disadvantage to small!Teuk is that his cock can't go all the way in without damaging the bundle of nerves situated deep inside of Leeteuk.
So Kangin takes care not to lose his head, takes care to push in gently, takes care to brush against Leeteuk's prostate hard enough to bring him to a melting pool of gasps and cries of more, Kangin, more, but soft enough not to injure.
It is fairly easy, until Leeteuk pushes himself back onto Kangin, forces him deeper, and then Kangin loses all self control (which really wasn't there in the first place).
-
Kangin notes, with some resentment, that small!Teuk causes reactions in people - his own members for God's sake - that he never thought possible before.
Heechul and Sungmin stop competing with Leeteuk as to whom the prettiest member in the group is (to which Sungmin would say, "hyung, it's evidently me; stop fighting over such an obvious question." and Yesung would argue relentlessly about how "Ryeowook is obviously the prettiest one here; open your eyes and seeeeeeeeee."
However, Kangin decides later on at night when he's got Leeteuk under him, needy and gasping, that Leeteuk is, indeed, the prettiest member in the group; but his opinions go unheard of), and start doting on him like disturbingly maternal older sisters, decorating Leeteuk's hair with Heebum's hair ribbons and cooing, "Oh, aren't you such a pretty little dear." To which Leeteuk would shudder, tug the ribbons off, and attempt to escape from Sungmin and Heechul's grasp.
Hankyung starts cooking more of his Chinese dumplings and Beijing Fried Rice, saying, "Leeteukie, eat more, you need to grow into a big man."
Leeteuk would stare at the two plates of rice and dumplings in front of him, glare at Hankyung, and say snippily, "I already am a man," before flouncing off the baby chair with some difficulty and running to his room (because it would take forever for his small legs to get to his room if he were to walk).
Hankyung simply looks dejectedly at Leeteuk's retreating back and flips his phone open to call Siwon for help in finishing his food.
Yesung and Donghae both attempt to get Leeteuk to communicate with Ddangkoma because, as Donghae claims, "the aliens took hyung to Mars and shrunk him and now he has supernatural abilities," and Yesung is just weird so it's normal for him to agree with Donghae.
("Kangin," Leeteuk complains one night, voice endearingly small and girly, "Can you stop them from trying to stuff my head into Ddangkoma's cage? Why won't they understand that no matter how small I am, I won't be able to fit inside the cage with Ddangkoma?"
Kangin only grunts and hugs Leeteuk like he used to hug his teddy bear before his father took it from him and threw it down the garbage chute, claiming that Kangin was "a big man now".)
Shindong doesn't treat Leeteuk any differently, to which Leeteuk is very glad for and, much to Kangin's dismay, starts the habit of watching TV while sitting on Shindong's lap because, yes, everybody knows, he is very soft.
Eunhyuk drags Leeteuk off to Sukira and starts introducing him to the staff and public eye as Eunteuk's baby child; and one night, when Kangin stumbles back to the dorms drunk, he doesn't find any reason not to wrangle Eunhyuk's neck, until Leeteuk comes up to him and glomps one of his legs.
Siwon takes Leeteuk into Hankyung's room every night and supposedly prays with him for an hour straight. Kangin absolutely does not like this, because at one point of time, he swears he hears moans and rough growls of "oh hyung, just like that, yessss."
He is not happy. Not at all.
One night, when Kangin breaks down the door and stampedes into Hankyung's room yielding an axe, he realizes to his great relief that one, Siwon isn't taking advantage of Leeteuk's diminutiveness, and two, Siwon, apparently, is a big fan of back massages, and thus is using Leeteuk's lightness to his advantage and demanding that Leeteuk walk up and down his back.
("What?" Siwon asks, scowling at Kangin in a rare outburst of huffiness. "I can't be old, too?")
Ryeowook starts singing composed lullabies with Yesung every night outside Leeteuk's bedroom door, and Kangin has no doubt that Yesung was the one who inflicted the idea upon the poor boy. Kyuhyun even, albeit grudgingly, joins them once in a while, and Kangin doesn't like this either, because this means he can't fuck Leeteuk senseless like he would like to.
Kibum hasn't been around for a long time, and doesn't know about the whole incident until Leeteuk reverts back to normal and everyone is disappointed.
Everyone, especially Kangin.
-
That is until Kangin notices, the morning Leeteuk returns back to normal, that his hole is still as small and petite as ever.
"Kangin?" Leeteuk murmurs sleepily after a moment. Then he sits straight up, sadly blocking out the lovely view from Kangin, and repeats his name, but with more bewilderment. "You shrunk!" He cries, smile lighting up his face. Leeteuk takes a quick look around the room. "The whole world shrunk!" He exclaims happily, and totally forgets about being naked.
Kangin sighs. "No Leeteuk," he says patiently, and tries to push Leeteuk down on the bed again so he can check if any other parts of Leeteuk have remained small. It was his only reason to do so. Really. "You went back to normal."
Leeteuk struggles, and finally realizes that his pants have been taken off. "Kangin!" He reprimands dolefully, and attempts to cover his parts. "Where are my clothes?"
"I took them off," Kangin replies, and spreads Leeteuk's legs in what he hopes isn't a lecherous way. "And your cock is still small, by the way," he informs.
Leeteuk looks down and, gaping in horror, collapses back onto the bed.
-
"WHERE'S LEETEUK-SSHI?" Their manager explodes, tapping his foot impatiently on the floor, eyes flying from his watch to Kangin and to his clipboard. "DIDN'T YOU SAY HE'S BACK TO NORMA -"
Kangin steps in, and interrupts the manager. "He's still asleep," he says amicably. Heechul distinctly rolls his eyes and crosses his arms again.
"WELL WAKE HIM UP, THEN!"
Kangin raises a finger to his lips and, shooting a warning glare to every member in the room to assure no one follows him, leads the manager to Leeteuk's room.
-
When Kangin opens the door to Leeteuk's room, his manager lets out another startled croak and, like before, falls lifelessly to the floor.
When the manager wakes up, several minutes later, Leeteuk's room is locked and suspicious sounds are filtering through the crack under the door. Deciding that he's seen and heard more than any normal person who didn't have to manage Super Junior should see, their manager picks himself up from the floor and makes his way back outside to the living room, where everybody has fallen asleep, splayed out in disturbing positions over each others' bodies.
I need to see a therapist, thinks the manager sadly.
-
Notes: Some concrit please. :D First attempted crack fic that I managed to finish, so please comment here if there's something off about it. Thanks for reading!
Bonus points for anybody who guesses where I got my title from, rofl.