You're Such A Pinball
Lee came over early this morning, stayed up all night (well, I was with him for half of it since we'd stayed up playing Diablo II: Lord of Destruction until 3:00 AM), so he could show up at 8:00 AM and surprise me. He did.
He might not be the brightest kid in the world, but he is thoughtful. And giving. And kind, loving, beautiful, witty, and brilliant. He can be a bit naive at times, but that only acts as a reminder for me, reminding me how innocent he really is.
I've finally been able to put everything in retrospect, and figured out my problem. The reason I start falling apart when he's not around is because I don't know what to do with myself when he's not with me. I live for the time I spend with him, he makes me feel necessary, loved, protected, worthy. That's why the in between days are hell. I have him, then I don't have him. To get someone addicted, take that drug away, then leaving them withering in withdrawal, it's inhumane.
I've got an angel asleep in my bed, and a problem.