(no subject)
So my excitement was stiffled by my mother. I really hate her sometimes, and I told her that tonight. She has pissed me off hardcore, and I just can't fucking take it anymore. Why doesn't she just come out and say that she thinks I am a fucking nobody. Why doesn't she just admit that she thinks I am a failure. I got into my first choice college, but she feels the need to throw in my face all the time, that they could still reject me if they wanted. I've sat at home now, and made up all my goddamn makeup work for school, okay it was like 8 fucking hours of Math and Honors GOVT, it wasnt freaking simple, especially math, cause i had no freaking clue what I was doing, but I fucking taught it to myself from the book and did all the work i was supposed to do. And it's never fucking enough for her. Why do I even bother coming home? All through dinner we sat there screaming at one another. And every once and awhile my dad would throw his two cents in, try to plead with both cases. Whatever, I'm fucking done. She trys to think the worst of me at all times. I think she would die happy if I came home pregnant one night, cause then I would have become everything she thinks I am. Not that I am saying I've never screwed up before, nor done something that might induce that, It's just that, no matter what she will always think I am failure. When I got my acceptance letter to Longwood, what was the first fucking thing she pointed out to me??? O, a part of the letter that says if Longwood wants, they can still reject you if you don't keep your grades up. But the truth is, My grades are freaking better than they were last year. So I guess if Longwood doesn't want a A & B student, then I guess, yeah we will have a prob. They aren't going to deny me to graduate because i missed 2 weeks of school, cause I was freaking sick. I mean i have doctors notes, I have hospital notes, they aren't going to tell me..."Well that looks like a personal problem to me, sorry you can't graduate." I mean good lord. Whatever. I can't wait until Sat. I am going to Nags Head. And i will get trashed. Thank God.