Can't sleep...

Nov 07, 2004 01:01

I want to talk to someone, I'm bored and I can't sleep - I can't stop thinking.

Today, well, Yesterday was my moms birthday. My birthday is in 10 days!! It's on a wednesday, ew, I don't like wednesday. I want to dance but I can't cause I'm upstairs and plus I don't have much room. My dads apartment is kind of small. Today I was so bored I fell asleep, I guess cause I was laying down and had nothing else to do. I did write a lot today though
Last weekend I watched a home movie from when I lived in Maryland. It was funny! My mom had an accent, my dad was just as much of a smartass, but he made my mom laugh. There was shot a clip of the cat playing with the tinsle on the tree. I was so little, my brother was just as enthusiastic about life(sarcasim). I was REALLY blonde! We looked happy. I wish I had a real memory instead of the one I found on tape. I miss that house, I miss Maryland. i wonder what I would be like, what life would be like if I never would've moved here to California?
Kathy was funny on friday taking pictures of Rudy and I, but does anyone know why she was doing it? Holy Jesus! I just realized this is my last year with him, before he goes to the marines. Oh, wow!
I don't know what I want. I know I'm already bad at decision making. I'm very indecisive, but... I feel like I can't make up my mind about anything lately! I can't decide if i want to be in acting for the rest of the year. If I you want to committ to 7th period dance or even if I want to keep skating. No one can make the decision for me because they don't know how I feel about it and the pros and cons and everything. I have to do it and soon! But I don't know what to do. I'm so confused, Sometimes I feel like my brain is in my stomach other times I feel like it went through I meat shreder and is scattered everywhere--ew that was disgusting.

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