Humphrey The Singing Vibrator and My Crack!Dream
HELLO LJ WORLD!!! :D
*flashylights*
So, yeah, for school today we had this practice SAT writes and so I was locked in my homeroom with my homies...I love them.
I can't wait for Wildcat Challenge. Glassassinators are going to dominate.
Same in Powderpuff. We so have this shit.
Seniors kick ass.
So anyway, yeah the prompt was on politness being magical.
Fuuuuucckkk.
All of us were like "This is SO GAY."
It really was.
So anyway, after that I was talking to Kimmi and we were discussing fun toys from Spencers...
and of course Meagan, my cute innocent friend was like "What are you talking about? Can I know? What is it?" And we're both like "Uhhh, you don't wanna know."
So she turns around and then Kimmi and I start talking about vibrators and how far they've come. xD
Like how technologically advanced they are.
She was like "Bored with your old vibrator?"
Then I started this crazy amazing vibrator idea:
"Try the Awesomo 2250! It has flashing lights and jewels and flailing arms and it sings to you!"
And so we were just discussing this very GQ idea and I was like "If it hummed for you, that would be better, more vibrations."
And unfortunately she misunderstood me and said "If his name was Humphrey?"
So yeah, I fell out of my chair laughing, because HOLY SHIT.
A singing, flashing, beeping, flailing vibrator named HUMPHREY.
It was just priceless.
So yes.
I pictured it singing a really old song from like the fourties or fifties or whatever...
Like...some Sinatra or whatever floats its boat.
In other news:
I CAN'T FIND ONE DAMN DRAWING OF VULCAN GENITALIA.
Seriously, WHY THE FUCK NOT?
This should not happen.
If I want a damn drawing of a retractable, green, beaded penis with flailing tendrils, I WILL FIND IT.
So if anyone finds such a thing for the love of god do not hide it from me.
Um...what else what else...I didn't do homework tonight.
I don't think I had any.
Cos I'm going to UCF tomorrow to do research for senior project.
Yum, right? ><
I'd rather go to UNF. XD But that's like WAY the hell up there.
Oh and guess what world? I might have pilomatrixoma!
Doesn't that sound like so much fun.
It means a benign tumor. Oh god how fun.
(Although it does have the word 'matrix' in it...><)
Ummmms....So.
My gay friend might like Sulu, so it's like :o
YES BAMBI, I shall make a trekkie of you yet.
(Yez, I calls him Bambi. Cos I love Carla.)
And he's all like "Kirk/Spock totally works."
And I'm like "I know, RIGHT? For realsies, babe."
ZQ COME OUT ALREADY.
You are only fooling selfish little fanpoops who say
"He's too hot to be gay."
FUCK THEM IN THE NECK (as my mother would say...and she does....I have a strange family.)
Um...So OH YEAH HOW DID I FORGET?!!
I had a dream that I wanted a goat.
Like really badly wanted a goat.
So I attented goat-keeping classes.
And I was like "I could do this. I really could."
And THEN. AND THEN.
All these old Russian men were DYING
and I was like OMG WE MUST SAVE THEM.
And this stupid guy was working for me and there's this dying old Russian man in the hall.
And I'm just like "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? Take him to Chekov."
He was like "Huh?"
"TAKE HIM TO CHEKOV! NOW! NOW!"
So...yeah. I guess because I saw how beautifully Walter Koenig ages I think he can save old Russian men from dying.
LOL RATED R DRAWING UNDER CUT BY YOURS TRULEY
Penises are funny. They really are.
*flashylights*
So, yeah, for school today we had this practice SAT writes and so I was locked in my homeroom with my homies...I love them.
I can't wait for Wildcat Challenge. Glassassinators are going to dominate.
Same in Powderpuff. We so have this shit.
Seniors kick ass.
So anyway, yeah the prompt was on politness being magical.
Fuuuuucckkk.
All of us were like "This is SO GAY."
It really was.
So anyway, after that I was talking to Kimmi and we were discussing fun toys from Spencers...
and of course Meagan, my cute innocent friend was like "What are you talking about? Can I know? What is it?" And we're both like "Uhhh, you don't wanna know."
So she turns around and then Kimmi and I start talking about vibrators and how far they've come. xD
Like how technologically advanced they are.
She was like "Bored with your old vibrator?"
Then I started this crazy amazing vibrator idea:
"Try the Awesomo 2250! It has flashing lights and jewels and flailing arms and it sings to you!"
And so we were just discussing this very GQ idea and I was like "If it hummed for you, that would be better, more vibrations."
And unfortunately she misunderstood me and said "If his name was Humphrey?"
So yeah, I fell out of my chair laughing, because HOLY SHIT.
A singing, flashing, beeping, flailing vibrator named HUMPHREY.
It was just priceless.
So yes.
I pictured it singing a really old song from like the fourties or fifties or whatever...
Like...some Sinatra or whatever floats its boat.
In other news:
I CAN'T FIND ONE DAMN DRAWING OF VULCAN GENITALIA.
Seriously, WHY THE FUCK NOT?
This should not happen.
If I want a damn drawing of a retractable, green, beaded penis with flailing tendrils, I WILL FIND IT.
So if anyone finds such a thing for the love of god do not hide it from me.
Um...what else what else...I didn't do homework tonight.
I don't think I had any.
Cos I'm going to UCF tomorrow to do research for senior project.
Yum, right? ><
I'd rather go to UNF. XD But that's like WAY the hell up there.
Oh and guess what world? I might have pilomatrixoma!
Doesn't that sound like so much fun.
It means a benign tumor. Oh god how fun.
(Although it does have the word 'matrix' in it...><)
Ummmms....So.
My gay friend might like Sulu, so it's like :o
YES BAMBI, I shall make a trekkie of you yet.
(Yez, I calls him Bambi. Cos I love Carla.)
And he's all like "Kirk/Spock totally works."
And I'm like "I know, RIGHT? For realsies, babe."
ZQ COME OUT ALREADY.
You are only fooling selfish little fanpoops who say
"He's too hot to be gay."
FUCK THEM IN THE NECK (as my mother would say...and she does....I have a strange family.)
Um...So OH YEAH HOW DID I FORGET?!!
I had a dream that I wanted a goat.
Like really badly wanted a goat.
So I attented goat-keeping classes.
And I was like "I could do this. I really could."
And THEN. AND THEN.
All these old Russian men were DYING
and I was like OMG WE MUST SAVE THEM.
And this stupid guy was working for me and there's this dying old Russian man in the hall.
And I'm just like "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? Take him to Chekov."
He was like "Huh?"
"TAKE HIM TO CHEKOV! NOW! NOW!"
So...yeah. I guess because I saw how beautifully Walter Koenig ages I think he can save old Russian men from dying.
LOL RATED R DRAWING UNDER CUT BY YOURS TRULEY
Penises are funny. They really are.