In Which I Think too Much

[fearedeyepatch]

So, I've been thinking a lot about history, and travel, and... well, history travel. And I've kinda been figuring out I do in fact have quite the case of White Man's Guilt (I am, after all, pretty much strictly European, mostly Central European at that, being half German, a fourth Polish, and a scattering of English, Scottish and Holland-ish (How

Comments

[vital_signs1719]

Hmm, interesting. I used to have the same thing back when I was younger, but that changed for three reasons. First, I realized I'm such a minority in every OTHER way (gender, socio-economic, familial, educational background, experiences, orientation, etc., etc., etc.) that...well, yeah. Also, the only culture I identify with even a little bit is Scottish (even though I'm like 1/4 Dutch and 1/2 someplace-in-Scandinavia, and only an eighth or a sixteenth Scottish--can't remember), and Scotland has been pretty brutalized in its history, particularly the Gaelic-speaking parts. And lastly, about 75% of my friends are some type of racial/ethnic minority. Mostly Asian, but lots more too. And our friendships just wouldn't be the same if there wasn't cross-cultural sharing, so...it's not awkward anymore. (A visiting scholar from China in my lab made me some Chinese tea the other night, and it was SO GOOD. Very tasty cultural sharing. ;D

[fearedeyepatch]

Yeah. I have been getting over it, and today I just basically said "Fuck this." Which was what this post was about, working through it through writing it out to get over it (I deal with my issues through writing about them). Like, some places will always be harder for me than others, and Hawaii is probably going to be one of those

[vital_signs1719]

ALBA GU BRATH. I AM SO JEALOUS THAT YOU GOT TO GO THERE. I WOULD GIVE MY RIGHT ARM TO BE ABLE TO GO THERE. *goes off waving arm to crowd, "hey, anybody want to exchange an arm for a plane ticket to Scotland?"* *smacks brain*

Wow, another exchange student? You guys sure pick up a lot of them. I hope this experience turns out well.

*sighs* Someday I will travel, maybe...I WANT TO NOW DAMNIT. But I has no $$$. *sobs*

[fearedeyepatch]

YES. BUT IT WAS ONLY FOR LIKE... THREE DAYS. ;_; But still, I am so happy I even got that chance. I just wish it could have been longer...

This will be our 4th. Two Japanese and a Chinese (That did not work out, as you should be well aware). This is the first time the program has ever had Korean students over and it's a very small group. Next year they're talking about having a group from Europe for the first time and I'm just like YES! Please! I love exchange students just... not the one I had living with me for a year. Didn't work out so well. But 3 weeks is good.

YES. TRAVEL. It is probably what I'm going to spend most of my money on... travel and books. Food will be secondary (And, really awesome coats and boots). If I ever get out of college and get a job that is...

[vital_signs1719]

:)

Yes, I recall. That's cool you might get European ones too. :) And 3 weeks seems like a much more reasonable amount of time.

:D :D :D *shrugs* Who needs food? Or clothes? My sister spends most of her money on shoes, and I'm like, "...we have very different tastes." I spent this morning drooling over the thought of having a silver-handled cane, hollow with a sword hidden inside. :D

[fearedeyepatch]

Yeah. Three weeks should be good. Or even a month or two. But 9? You have to really get along.

Haha, I think I have enough boots for now, but there's this one coat I keep drooling over... it's a knee length coat that looks like it's from 18th century France or something. And oh god, I've wanted a cane for years. I found the perfect one once at an antique shop... but had no money and dad rolled his eyes at me. I still regret that.

[vital_signs1719]

Sweet. I want you to get that coat, so you can send me pictures. ;)

[fearedeyepatch]

http://www.pyramidcollection.com/itemdy00.asp?T1=P87632+XS&ID=50,1974#top This one. It's ridiculous, and I want it.

[fearedeyepatch]

Also, it depends on which culture. I'm pretty comfortable around Asian culture and people from them, but Latin American, or African descendants, or the Middle East... less so. But I'm working on it. It's just, I come from a very middle class, white background. Or, at least, that how I grew up (though my parents certainly weren't always comfortably middle class).

[vital_signs1719]

Haha, maybe it's easier for me because my family is kind of like a culture in and of itself. :P (And part of that culture included a slightly paranoid/'us against the world'/survivalist slant that disallowed other identifications.) I spent a lot of my childhood/teenage years reading things that included supposedly representative "average" white middle-class Americans, and was like, "That's so weird..." My (Malaysian) roommate tells me that I have some Asian approaches to some things. But in other ways, we're just very strange.

[fearedeyepatch]

Yeah, that could be interesting. I think every family is their own little culture, some more so than others. Mine is very intellectual and open, so it surprises me (still!) that some people don't know who Thomas Hardy is or something. Honestly, I don't think there's such a think as an average white middle class American... I know by that definition I'm not one.

[vital_signs1719]

Mm-hm. Yeah, there's probably no average. I enjoyed what I've seen/experienced of your family culture, it's so very nerdy. ;) But of course, I'm only seeing a superficial outsider's perspective.

Mine probably varied from the nebulous "norm" more than most. We had very rigid rules about interactions with one another and Outsiders, physical and emotional intimacy, loyalty, money, the distinct chain of command and subsequent power-wielding, and on and on and on...most of which probably wouldn't be associated with this country or era. And...there are four of us. >.> Microculture much?

[fearedeyepatch]

Oh, we are that nerdy. All the time. It's a very nerdtastic subculture. We have our issues too, but we can usually talk about them (Unless it's me and mom. Then it's more like yelling... but even then, once we've calmed down).

Wow. That is a micro-culture. I don't think we really even have rules at all, other than, don't be completely crazy.

[vital_signs1719]

:) It makes me nerdhappy. (And talking is good.)

Uh-huh. Yeah, most of the rules were implied rather than explicit, but trust me, growing up like that, you learned them fast. Like any situation in which you're transplanted from one culture to another, being confronted with the differences once I got to SVC and later to uni had its difficult moments. I'm still working it out. (Hahaha, I like that rule. Wish we'd had that one. >.>)

[fearedeyepatch]

Nerdwin! (Talking is very good. It makes me crazy thankful dad has a background in psychology... it makes things work better when you understand the human mind).

Yeah. Living with a room mate was hard for me, in part because my family, and her family, had totally different unwritten rules, so she kept freaking out over my perfectly normal behavior (if I had been home that is). It's family culture shock! (It's a good rule).