(no subject)
tons of shit has happened since i last done this...dunno where to start and i prolly wont get this in order but anyway...
me n swayzey, last week, wanted to go to the pub so he came down here then we headed down to the pub. decided we wanted to go to asda first to see if we could see this old guy we've called roger moore, everynite of the week at the same time...without fail this guy will be in asda reading the evening times news paper, a dont think hes right in the heed to be honest which is a shame. so we seen roger n walked up lookin at the midori n haloween stuff. walking up to amigos and we bump into this punter swaz knows from college called mark, at first a thought it was jus some random weirdo saying hello but anyway stood talkin to him n couldnt get away from him, hes like ''so what ye's up to the nite??'' n aw that pish n hes like ''u's wanna come to my hoose, i'll buy u's a curry'' .....ooook then =| didnt wanna be nasty to him so we kept making up excuses, a said well were gonna go to the pub so we cant tonite but we will one nite, he said to us..''mon over n sit down with me, we can talk about it'' aye very good, so we did, ended up he asked to asda with him, then to the bank then he tagged along to the pub with us. he bought me 2 pints so yas to that man. this prick wouldnt stop talking about buddism, he kept starting this deep conversation about god n christ n budda..what an arsehole only, i think hes a precher trying to convert us but a was jus happily getting pints off him, then he started this pish about how astronauts are in the bible n how god isnt real and jesus is a goat, worst thing about it hes being serious man. a was startin to get scared =| he asked us up to his and he would pay for the taxi so god knows why we agreed but we did. got the taxi up there and aye from amigos down to asda, and from the taxi in asda to his hoose...aw about fuckin budda and these munk fucko's from some mad indian place. the nite jus got worse n worse, we found out he lived in hillhouse, so got the taxi to mad pillhouse n his hoose was a fuckin tip, he had a sofa which was aw stained n mingin and a wee shit telly that one of ''the logders'' had in there room, it had a mad porno in it when we opened the dvd thingy =O!! fuck knows why i did this but i picked up this porn dvd box and smelt it, jus when im smelling he turns round and fuckin sees me lol....rid....fuckin....neck....so he puts this budda dvd on and 2mins later theres a bang and someone comes into the house, this wee cunt grabs this wooden pole and says ''aw shit i think someones broke into the house'' lmao so this wee ferret dude is diving about with a wooden pole ''composing'' himself for a fight lmao. it ends up its 1 of 3 fuckin POLISH!! guys that living with him, they cant even talk english the cuntos. jus to make things better this wee budda precher was fuckin bent, a thought a was gonna get bummed off a budda precher n 3 polish guys, so am like ''WWOW AM OOTA HERE, FONE ME A TAXI'' the nob gave swaz like 4 quid or something for the taxi home lol jus as were runnin oot the hoose swayzey kicked over a pint glass n jucie goes fuckin everywhere...on his shit wee tv remote for his shit wee telly, over his wee shit budda books, over this wee shit pillow, and on his shite carpet. a couldnt stop laughin man a felt well bad. we bolted oot his hoose and got home, never felt so reliefed in my life to be home.
Last tuesday a met nial n lail jus at the end of ma street n we walked to UC. a was in a shiter of a mood as usual but a kinda cheered up a bit time we got to uc. wee jo n that was standing outside uc so a stood with them for a while, then charmaine heed the baw came out for a while, people were sayin to me tht swayzey was in a shite mood aswell so a went into uc to see him, sat up there for a while in the heat by this time a was feeling shite again so a went back outside, seen fake duffy n aw that crew there aswell...wee wanks. stood outside with jaimie hen n charlie n charmaine n aw that for a while then needed to get away from there man so a said a was going to the george for a pint and i'll meet them later to go to amigos for the jazz. walked down hamilton bumped into ma sister n that then bumped into an othr plumber from ma work, was talkin to him for ages n couldnt get aay from him. left from there n went into this wee dodgy lane for a pee n wee jo fones me lol lets jus say it was a difficult situation a was in, didnt bother with the george n jus went to amigos maself. spoke to gino, charmaines dad, for 5mins aswell. eventually they started to come in. wee jo, sarah n julie n jamie heen came down, then kudd n lee, then that wee prick faced fucker fuckin daniel, fuckin arsehole a hate him with a passion. enough of that anyway...wee heed the baw chow went to the george lookin for me, i forgot to tell her no to go there for me =( sorry hen! sat there in one shite mood for most of the nite like a dick. then everyone left apart from me n chow. this mad guy...BIG DOUGIE! big steamer man! he came up to our table n jus tried to sit down he said ''alright people'' am like n jus who the fuck r u mate, he tried to shake ma hand n hes like am dougie, a stood up then the 2 barmen came over n tried to get him out, a got a drink then n turned round to see him gettin chucked oot lol dickheed dougie. charmaine went for a munch with the band and a was left maself for a while, this mad old guy...a dont know his name so i'll call him mitch...aye so mitch shouted on me n hes like ''awright bud ye want a pint??'' me being a jake am like aye no bother mate so a got talkin to him and he was telling me about this guy he was fighting down the train station in glasgow n aw that pish lol he was like 60!! ahaha then he was saying hes a mad karate expert so a wasnae gonna mess lol. he got me an other pint n charmaine came back n was sittin herself for 10mins then one of ehr dads pals came up to charmaine ns tarted talkin to her, mad mitch was gonna fuckin plug the guy for me lol he thought she was my girlfriend and this guy was chattin her up but its cool a calmed him down lol. anyway sat back with chow heed n had a well good laugh, her n her wee camera the bum! takin drunk pics of me lookin like a mad retard. shes still got this wee plumbers card i gave her with my pic of it lol =D so a was pretty drunk by the time the jazz had finished, charmaine got a lift up n a treked it in the pishin rain but its cool i got time to think n that.
went out drinking with swayzey during the week, hes been telling me about this jagermeister shit n it sounds well gid so during the week we went to asda n bought jagermeister n cheap arsed cider which was actually pretty nice. seen roger moore for a while then went roon the back of the cinema n started drinking. it tastes no bad n u can drink it fast so were sittin tannin this bottle of jagermeister then start on this cider pish...one minute a was completly fine n the next minute a was fucked right oot ma trumpet man ave no been as drunk like this in fuckin ages man, we were oot of it. went round to electronics n met noor n lisa n a cannae even mind who else was there. we TRIED to play pool but it jus wasnt happenin a couldnt even stagger right nevermind walk or try to play pool. made a cunt of ourselfs in there then swayzey got chucked out for being a drunk lmao we went for a pee but a was smoking a fag at the time n gave maself an injury and a half, its cool it was jus ma finger a burnt but its a peach, big massive deep burn on ma finger. a was lucky when u think about it lol. bumped into scott outside electronics he was going to the pub aswell, he wasnt sayng much. emm...so from there we walked with garry miller n noor to mcdonalds, swaz at this point was oot his trolley honestly, he couldnt stand lol, a felt well embrassed coz a was starting to sober up a bit, took a walk up to the bus station and a was in my mood as fuckin usual. sat at the bus station n waited on garry n noor n miller gettin there bus home, that came n me n swaz jus staggered up the road ma mood started off shite n jus went to shiter =( got home n went to bed. out of it.
Friday night...met wee jo to go to the pub with. met her at tabac n swaz n darren was there aswell, they were back from glasgow. spoke to them for a wee while n me n swaz spoke about half the stuff we got up to the nite we were oot of it lol, rid neck man. we were meeting charmaainee and vikki at tabac aswell. met them swaz n that went home n we all went down to amigos. a was drinking the best...mon the magners. charmaine took well good pictures of us that am dying to see but shes no here the now, a think shes away over in the fife direction...sat there n got pretty drunk then these 2 fuckin arseholes that had sat down across from us shouted over to me ''is that ur burd mate'' n pointed to wee jo a said naw shes ma burd n pointed to charmaine so they would leave her alone no offence to wee jo lol. the guys using all his best pish patter ''aw ur gorgous hunni, mon over with me hen'' pricks, so he kept hassling us and am like ''NAW MAN SHES GOT A BOYFRIEND'' n he said who n wee jo jus looked at me lol am like ''BIG JAMIE...'' then charmaine heed said ''AYE HES A BOXER!'' lmao, then the guys like ''aye so whit'' a said to him ''jus leave her alone''' then he said whit u being so protective about then a was gittin cheeky to him, he was gittin well pissed off n a seen him wantin to come over n swing for me so a calmed down a bit then this fuckin cunto from a different table which had nothing to do with it souts ''AYE HES TALKIN BULLSHIT'' about me =O PRICK FACED WANK! a was fuckin ragin so eventually wee jo n charmaine went over with them n a sat with vikki. he one of they fuckin ARSEHOLES are saying to fuckin charmaine ''aye ur a 32 c'' n aw that shit, tyring to feel her up, offt tae fuck a swear to god that cunts lucky a didnt hear it, charmiane told me when we were ootside, but a was fuckin...ragin as ye can imagine. a hate fuckers like that then that dickheed at the other table gettin involed. dicks. so we left n on the way out one of them is like ''haw, come here'' so a did a went over with ma fist oot n he said ''u need to calm down over yer pals were only kiddin on n sayin stuff like that lol, total prunes honestly a cannot be fucked with prunes like them. am like aye whitever see ye n walked away. left there n went to the george for a drink YAS MON THE GEORGE!! went in and the place was mobbed...good stuff (Y) good for business lol, spoke to the owner for a while then went n sat over with vikki n that. had a few drinks and aw jo was talking about was food lol...TOP MUNCH! eh vikki =P she kept doin wavin her finger about n saying ''aw top man!'' lmao well funny so me n vikki bum jus walked around doing it for the rest of the nite lol =P jo was going aff her heed coz she needed a munch so we had to go to mcdonalds lol jo had these tokens that get u free burgers n that...TOP BARGIN! miller n that came in n they sat with us but a think it was a rid neck for him sittin with people that were munchin free burders...wavin there fingers about saying TOP MUNCH MAN TOP!! lol. nial foned me n asked where a was so he came down for me aswell. from mcdonalds we left n walked up to the train station...so aye jus skip most of that from then on, lets jus say a wasnt a happy camper n ended up crackin the mad ticket office windaes and the windaes at the wee bit u can sit in, a thought a had panned them a hut them that hard =| a was heavy ragin, a jus stormed off like a dick. wee jo foned n asked where a was so we could go for an other pint, met her n went to harleys. garry was in harleys with ross so he came over n sat with us for a while n had a drink, was talkin to him but a was in a shite mood...aye again. jo had to leave n get her bus so a jaked the pint n left with wee jo. stood about for ages waiting on ehr bus but it didnt turn up and there was these 2 guys stadnign with us that she knew, they seemed like nobs but a wasnt in the mood for anyone at the time so they were prolly cool enough guys. ended up they bummed a taxi to strathven lol n a walked home.
last nite nial txt me..HID A WELL RARE WAN MAN!...n asked me to go down n meet him n jenny n that. went down to asda n stood about for a while. left from there n walked back up it was pretty boring, met noor n clayre up the top cross n they were going to motherwell..ended up i went to m n d's with them. top laugh man, on all the mad machines tyrin to win tokens so clayre could this wee shite toy thingy lol. n we went on the thing that gives u electric shocks, YAS MAN... ME N CLAYRE...2'000 WATTS! git it up yes we're hardcore. lol. we went through to the bar but cunts from ma college were there n if a sat down for a drink a would be there aw nite with them so we jus left n laughed at some old burd tyring to do karoke on the way out. me n clayre went on this mad simulator thingy which looked...and felt...well dodgy man lol, rid neck steppin back out it, it was only a wee 2 seater thing aswell lol. then noor n clayre had a shot. foned a taxi again to go back into hamilton then we tried to decided weather to get a carry out or not. walked up to habibs but it wa sshut so a got a kebab n we went a stoat lol. saw wee karen n was talkin to her for a bit, she wasnt feeling very well =( was talkin to ma ex natalie aswell n shes got her own flat n aw that now =O form there me n noor n clayre went up tomines to steal ma dads beer. had to pure sneak about the house case he woke up n eard us lol, only sat in here for a wee while n it was like 12 o clock..but no on ma watch eh clayre lol. ma fuckin watch broke n a thought it was like half 9 lol. noor was sleepin at clayres so they headed home n a sat n drank the rest of it maself n spoke to vikki bum on msn for a while then went to bed...
the day done nothing atall, wanna go ut for a drink but no-one is wanna go out really..
me n swayzey, last week, wanted to go to the pub so he came down here then we headed down to the pub. decided we wanted to go to asda first to see if we could see this old guy we've called roger moore, everynite of the week at the same time...without fail this guy will be in asda reading the evening times news paper, a dont think hes right in the heed to be honest which is a shame. so we seen roger n walked up lookin at the midori n haloween stuff. walking up to amigos and we bump into this punter swaz knows from college called mark, at first a thought it was jus some random weirdo saying hello but anyway stood talkin to him n couldnt get away from him, hes like ''so what ye's up to the nite??'' n aw that pish n hes like ''u's wanna come to my hoose, i'll buy u's a curry'' .....ooook then =| didnt wanna be nasty to him so we kept making up excuses, a said well were gonna go to the pub so we cant tonite but we will one nite, he said to us..''mon over n sit down with me, we can talk about it'' aye very good, so we did, ended up he asked to asda with him, then to the bank then he tagged along to the pub with us. he bought me 2 pints so yas to that man. this prick wouldnt stop talking about buddism, he kept starting this deep conversation about god n christ n budda..what an arsehole only, i think hes a precher trying to convert us but a was jus happily getting pints off him, then he started this pish about how astronauts are in the bible n how god isnt real and jesus is a goat, worst thing about it hes being serious man. a was startin to get scared =| he asked us up to his and he would pay for the taxi so god knows why we agreed but we did. got the taxi up there and aye from amigos down to asda, and from the taxi in asda to his hoose...aw about fuckin budda and these munk fucko's from some mad indian place. the nite jus got worse n worse, we found out he lived in hillhouse, so got the taxi to mad pillhouse n his hoose was a fuckin tip, he had a sofa which was aw stained n mingin and a wee shit telly that one of ''the logders'' had in there room, it had a mad porno in it when we opened the dvd thingy =O!! fuck knows why i did this but i picked up this porn dvd box and smelt it, jus when im smelling he turns round and fuckin sees me lol....rid....fuckin....neck....so he puts this budda dvd on and 2mins later theres a bang and someone comes into the house, this wee cunt grabs this wooden pole and says ''aw shit i think someones broke into the house'' lmao so this wee ferret dude is diving about with a wooden pole ''composing'' himself for a fight lmao. it ends up its 1 of 3 fuckin POLISH!! guys that living with him, they cant even talk english the cuntos. jus to make things better this wee budda precher was fuckin bent, a thought a was gonna get bummed off a budda precher n 3 polish guys, so am like ''WWOW AM OOTA HERE, FONE ME A TAXI'' the nob gave swaz like 4 quid or something for the taxi home lol jus as were runnin oot the hoose swayzey kicked over a pint glass n jucie goes fuckin everywhere...on his shit wee tv remote for his shit wee telly, over his wee shit budda books, over this wee shit pillow, and on his shite carpet. a couldnt stop laughin man a felt well bad. we bolted oot his hoose and got home, never felt so reliefed in my life to be home.
Last tuesday a met nial n lail jus at the end of ma street n we walked to UC. a was in a shiter of a mood as usual but a kinda cheered up a bit time we got to uc. wee jo n that was standing outside uc so a stood with them for a while, then charmaine heed the baw came out for a while, people were sayin to me tht swayzey was in a shite mood aswell so a went into uc to see him, sat up there for a while in the heat by this time a was feeling shite again so a went back outside, seen fake duffy n aw that crew there aswell...wee wanks. stood outside with jaimie hen n charlie n charmaine n aw that for a while then needed to get away from there man so a said a was going to the george for a pint and i'll meet them later to go to amigos for the jazz. walked down hamilton bumped into ma sister n that then bumped into an othr plumber from ma work, was talkin to him for ages n couldnt get aay from him. left from there n went into this wee dodgy lane for a pee n wee jo fones me lol lets jus say it was a difficult situation a was in, didnt bother with the george n jus went to amigos maself. spoke to gino, charmaines dad, for 5mins aswell. eventually they started to come in. wee jo, sarah n julie n jamie heen came down, then kudd n lee, then that wee prick faced fucker fuckin daniel, fuckin arsehole a hate him with a passion. enough of that anyway...wee heed the baw chow went to the george lookin for me, i forgot to tell her no to go there for me =( sorry hen! sat there in one shite mood for most of the nite like a dick. then everyone left apart from me n chow. this mad guy...BIG DOUGIE! big steamer man! he came up to our table n jus tried to sit down he said ''alright people'' am like n jus who the fuck r u mate, he tried to shake ma hand n hes like am dougie, a stood up then the 2 barmen came over n tried to get him out, a got a drink then n turned round to see him gettin chucked oot lol dickheed dougie. charmaine went for a munch with the band and a was left maself for a while, this mad old guy...a dont know his name so i'll call him mitch...aye so mitch shouted on me n hes like ''awright bud ye want a pint??'' me being a jake am like aye no bother mate so a got talkin to him and he was telling me about this guy he was fighting down the train station in glasgow n aw that pish lol he was like 60!! ahaha then he was saying hes a mad karate expert so a wasnae gonna mess lol. he got me an other pint n charmaine came back n was sittin herself for 10mins then one of ehr dads pals came up to charmaine ns tarted talkin to her, mad mitch was gonna fuckin plug the guy for me lol he thought she was my girlfriend and this guy was chattin her up but its cool a calmed him down lol. anyway sat back with chow heed n had a well good laugh, her n her wee camera the bum! takin drunk pics of me lookin like a mad retard. shes still got this wee plumbers card i gave her with my pic of it lol =D so a was pretty drunk by the time the jazz had finished, charmaine got a lift up n a treked it in the pishin rain but its cool i got time to think n that.
went out drinking with swayzey during the week, hes been telling me about this jagermeister shit n it sounds well gid so during the week we went to asda n bought jagermeister n cheap arsed cider which was actually pretty nice. seen roger moore for a while then went roon the back of the cinema n started drinking. it tastes no bad n u can drink it fast so were sittin tannin this bottle of jagermeister then start on this cider pish...one minute a was completly fine n the next minute a was fucked right oot ma trumpet man ave no been as drunk like this in fuckin ages man, we were oot of it. went round to electronics n met noor n lisa n a cannae even mind who else was there. we TRIED to play pool but it jus wasnt happenin a couldnt even stagger right nevermind walk or try to play pool. made a cunt of ourselfs in there then swayzey got chucked out for being a drunk lmao we went for a pee but a was smoking a fag at the time n gave maself an injury and a half, its cool it was jus ma finger a burnt but its a peach, big massive deep burn on ma finger. a was lucky when u think about it lol. bumped into scott outside electronics he was going to the pub aswell, he wasnt sayng much. emm...so from there we walked with garry miller n noor to mcdonalds, swaz at this point was oot his trolley honestly, he couldnt stand lol, a felt well embrassed coz a was starting to sober up a bit, took a walk up to the bus station and a was in my mood as fuckin usual. sat at the bus station n waited on garry n noor n miller gettin there bus home, that came n me n swaz jus staggered up the road ma mood started off shite n jus went to shiter =( got home n went to bed. out of it.
Friday night...met wee jo to go to the pub with. met her at tabac n swaz n darren was there aswell, they were back from glasgow. spoke to them for a wee while n me n swaz spoke about half the stuff we got up to the nite we were oot of it lol, rid neck man. we were meeting charmaainee and vikki at tabac aswell. met them swaz n that went home n we all went down to amigos. a was drinking the best...mon the magners. charmaine took well good pictures of us that am dying to see but shes no here the now, a think shes away over in the fife direction...sat there n got pretty drunk then these 2 fuckin arseholes that had sat down across from us shouted over to me ''is that ur burd mate'' n pointed to wee jo a said naw shes ma burd n pointed to charmaine so they would leave her alone no offence to wee jo lol. the guys using all his best pish patter ''aw ur gorgous hunni, mon over with me hen'' pricks, so he kept hassling us and am like ''NAW MAN SHES GOT A BOYFRIEND'' n he said who n wee jo jus looked at me lol am like ''BIG JAMIE...'' then charmaine heed said ''AYE HES A BOXER!'' lmao, then the guys like ''aye so whit'' a said to him ''jus leave her alone''' then he said whit u being so protective about then a was gittin cheeky to him, he was gittin well pissed off n a seen him wantin to come over n swing for me so a calmed down a bit then this fuckin cunto from a different table which had nothing to do with it souts ''AYE HES TALKIN BULLSHIT'' about me =O PRICK FACED WANK! a was fuckin ragin so eventually wee jo n charmaine went over with them n a sat with vikki. he one of they fuckin ARSEHOLES are saying to fuckin charmaine ''aye ur a 32 c'' n aw that shit, tyring to feel her up, offt tae fuck a swear to god that cunts lucky a didnt hear it, charmiane told me when we were ootside, but a was fuckin...ragin as ye can imagine. a hate fuckers like that then that dickheed at the other table gettin involed. dicks. so we left n on the way out one of them is like ''haw, come here'' so a did a went over with ma fist oot n he said ''u need to calm down over yer pals were only kiddin on n sayin stuff like that lol, total prunes honestly a cannot be fucked with prunes like them. am like aye whitever see ye n walked away. left there n went to the george for a drink YAS MON THE GEORGE!! went in and the place was mobbed...good stuff (Y) good for business lol, spoke to the owner for a while then went n sat over with vikki n that. had a few drinks and aw jo was talking about was food lol...TOP MUNCH! eh vikki =P she kept doin wavin her finger about n saying ''aw top man!'' lmao well funny so me n vikki bum jus walked around doing it for the rest of the nite lol =P jo was going aff her heed coz she needed a munch so we had to go to mcdonalds lol jo had these tokens that get u free burgers n that...TOP BARGIN! miller n that came in n they sat with us but a think it was a rid neck for him sittin with people that were munchin free burders...wavin there fingers about saying TOP MUNCH MAN TOP!! lol. nial foned me n asked where a was so he came down for me aswell. from mcdonalds we left n walked up to the train station...so aye jus skip most of that from then on, lets jus say a wasnt a happy camper n ended up crackin the mad ticket office windaes and the windaes at the wee bit u can sit in, a thought a had panned them a hut them that hard =| a was heavy ragin, a jus stormed off like a dick. wee jo foned n asked where a was so we could go for an other pint, met her n went to harleys. garry was in harleys with ross so he came over n sat with us for a while n had a drink, was talkin to him but a was in a shite mood...aye again. jo had to leave n get her bus so a jaked the pint n left with wee jo. stood about for ages waiting on ehr bus but it didnt turn up and there was these 2 guys stadnign with us that she knew, they seemed like nobs but a wasnt in the mood for anyone at the time so they were prolly cool enough guys. ended up they bummed a taxi to strathven lol n a walked home.
last nite nial txt me..HID A WELL RARE WAN MAN!...n asked me to go down n meet him n jenny n that. went down to asda n stood about for a while. left from there n walked back up it was pretty boring, met noor n clayre up the top cross n they were going to motherwell..ended up i went to m n d's with them. top laugh man, on all the mad machines tyrin to win tokens so clayre could this wee shite toy thingy lol. n we went on the thing that gives u electric shocks, YAS MAN... ME N CLAYRE...2'000 WATTS! git it up yes we're hardcore. lol. we went through to the bar but cunts from ma college were there n if a sat down for a drink a would be there aw nite with them so we jus left n laughed at some old burd tyring to do karoke on the way out. me n clayre went on this mad simulator thingy which looked...and felt...well dodgy man lol, rid neck steppin back out it, it was only a wee 2 seater thing aswell lol. then noor n clayre had a shot. foned a taxi again to go back into hamilton then we tried to decided weather to get a carry out or not. walked up to habibs but it wa sshut so a got a kebab n we went a stoat lol. saw wee karen n was talkin to her for a bit, she wasnt feeling very well =( was talkin to ma ex natalie aswell n shes got her own flat n aw that now =O form there me n noor n clayre went up tomines to steal ma dads beer. had to pure sneak about the house case he woke up n eard us lol, only sat in here for a wee while n it was like 12 o clock..but no on ma watch eh clayre lol. ma fuckin watch broke n a thought it was like half 9 lol. noor was sleepin at clayres so they headed home n a sat n drank the rest of it maself n spoke to vikki bum on msn for a while then went to bed...
the day done nothing atall, wanna go ut for a drink but no-one is wanna go out really..