Dear Chelsea
"I am a person who was raised in daycare. My mom took us to daycare at 5 am and got home at 7 pm. 5 days a week."
First off, that statement right that makes me feel very sad for you. It is INSANELY important in the first few years (at least 10 I would guess) to be involved in your childs life. My mom caught on to that fairly quickly when she'd work late and I'd stay up and wait for her to get home sometimes on a school night. She obviously put her JOB aside and took on a more active role in my life (PTA and whatever else). I was also left with a care-giver when I was much much younger and I can honestly say I think that made a big impact on me as a kid also. I didn't have that bond with my mother that most kids do. Only because my mom would go out drinking with my dad A LOT... and so that bond was with Mrs. Kathy. It's just the way nature is I think. I loved my mother - don't get me wrong. But, I could never fully understand why it didn't bother me to be 'left' with someone else to be taken care of. When a child that isn't left with a babysitter or daycare hardly ever has separation anxiety. I bet if they did a study it would show exactly what I'm trying to say. Looking back, I'm forever grateful my mom put me first instead of her job. She took me to ballet classes, she went to my recitals, my chorus concerts up in till I was in middle school... then drinking took over and we all know how that ended. The point is, just because it was okay for you as a child doesn't mean it will be okay for these poor kids. Talk about feeling 'shipped off'. They lost their mother to cancer and then thrown in with people they don't know very well and THEN your going to stick them in daycare?! How well do you see this working for you?! I don't see it working at all.
"OH! I know what else I meant to say.... I'm someone who learns out of books and education. By understanding and working with the different stages of development, things make more sense to me personally. For example, I didn't understand teenagers, AT ALL. I thought it was hormones... but, we all have hormones, so that didn't make sense to me. Yes, it is hormones, but, it's also that the frontal cortex, the area of the brain that makes concrete connections and thoughts, understands the bigger picture of things, and their implications, etc, isn't fully developed."
Pretty sure I 'screamed' this to you ALL in CAPS once before - YOU DON'T LEARN LIFE FROM A TEXT BOOK!!! And if you don't understand something you say it has to do with the frontal cortex and HORMONES?! Are you fucking kidding me right now?! A Teenager does random weird stuff because they are young and naive and (just like in the movie Bambi) still learning to freakin walk on their own two feet. Some of the shit that comes out of your mouth should smell and you should be able to smell it! Seriously! Besides how would you know how a teenager acts - you don't spend anytime with them! When was the last time you tried tutoring one or watching over a kid? Like never because you were always in school. I've tutored the kid down the street and I have no clue what she thinks half the time and I know she's aiming to get pregnant and be stupid because her mother doesn't watch her closely enough... and you know what?! I warned her and backed off because I know she is just going to have to learn the hard way.
Besides - in the beginning weren't you the one to say you didn't want kids? And now you want to take over these your boyfriends sisters kids...because why exactly? I'm sorry, I think the state's foster system would be a better parents in this case. You have NO experience. NONE! I have at least some from watching my friends three *caugh* brats and tutoring the kid down the street. I'm sorry I hope your plan blows up horribly in your face and the state takes the kids from you.
End Rant.
First off, that statement right that makes me feel very sad for you. It is INSANELY important in the first few years (at least 10 I would guess) to be involved in your childs life. My mom caught on to that fairly quickly when she'd work late and I'd stay up and wait for her to get home sometimes on a school night. She obviously put her JOB aside and took on a more active role in my life (PTA and whatever else). I was also left with a care-giver when I was much much younger and I can honestly say I think that made a big impact on me as a kid also. I didn't have that bond with my mother that most kids do. Only because my mom would go out drinking with my dad A LOT... and so that bond was with Mrs. Kathy. It's just the way nature is I think. I loved my mother - don't get me wrong. But, I could never fully understand why it didn't bother me to be 'left' with someone else to be taken care of. When a child that isn't left with a babysitter or daycare hardly ever has separation anxiety. I bet if they did a study it would show exactly what I'm trying to say. Looking back, I'm forever grateful my mom put me first instead of her job. She took me to ballet classes, she went to my recitals, my chorus concerts up in till I was in middle school... then drinking took over and we all know how that ended. The point is, just because it was okay for you as a child doesn't mean it will be okay for these poor kids. Talk about feeling 'shipped off'. They lost their mother to cancer and then thrown in with people they don't know very well and THEN your going to stick them in daycare?! How well do you see this working for you?! I don't see it working at all.
"OH! I know what else I meant to say.... I'm someone who learns out of books and education. By understanding and working with the different stages of development, things make more sense to me personally. For example, I didn't understand teenagers, AT ALL. I thought it was hormones... but, we all have hormones, so that didn't make sense to me. Yes, it is hormones, but, it's also that the frontal cortex, the area of the brain that makes concrete connections and thoughts, understands the bigger picture of things, and their implications, etc, isn't fully developed."
Pretty sure I 'screamed' this to you ALL in CAPS once before - YOU DON'T LEARN LIFE FROM A TEXT BOOK!!! And if you don't understand something you say it has to do with the frontal cortex and HORMONES?! Are you fucking kidding me right now?! A Teenager does random weird stuff because they are young and naive and (just like in the movie Bambi) still learning to freakin walk on their own two feet. Some of the shit that comes out of your mouth should smell and you should be able to smell it! Seriously! Besides how would you know how a teenager acts - you don't spend anytime with them! When was the last time you tried tutoring one or watching over a kid? Like never because you were always in school. I've tutored the kid down the street and I have no clue what she thinks half the time and I know she's aiming to get pregnant and be stupid because her mother doesn't watch her closely enough... and you know what?! I warned her and backed off because I know she is just going to have to learn the hard way.
Besides - in the beginning weren't you the one to say you didn't want kids? And now you want to take over these your boyfriends sisters kids...because why exactly? I'm sorry, I think the state's foster system would be a better parents in this case. You have NO experience. NONE! I have at least some from watching my friends three *caugh* brats and tutoring the kid down the street. I'm sorry I hope your plan blows up horribly in your face and the state takes the kids from you.
End Rant.