Danger In The Healing (2/25)
Title: Danger In The Healing
Authors:faynia and stormypup
Rating: R
Categories: Romance, Action/Adventure
Warnings: Harry's 17, so he's not at the age of legal consent
Summary: What if Dumbledore told Harry that he was dying, and what Snape's role was in it all. What if Harry then had to depend on the person he hated most in the world to honor Dumbledore's dying wishes?
Answers Challenge: Written for Wave XII of the Harry/Snape fest , What if… challenge.
Previous Chapters: Chapter One
Disclaimers: In the first few chapters we quoted liberally from HBP. All HP characters and their universe belong to J.K. Rowling and the WB, not us.
A/N: I'd like to thank my beta reader hannibal_topaz for sticking by me and stormypup and not being repelled by our horrible botching of the English language.
Also, I'd like to thank all those who left us comments on the last chapter. They filled us with warm fuzzies on these very cold January days.
Chapter Two
Harry wanted to kick and scream as he watched them, but he couldn't move and he couldn’t speak. He just couldn't stand it. The ferret was trembling and shaking and backing down, but Harry couldn't tear his eyes away from Dumbledore's frail frame. The old man was quaking and the light that shone brightly through his eyes was fading rapidly. Harry's heart missed a beat. This was it. This was what Dumbledore had tried to warn him of earlier and it wasn't anymore fair now than it had been then.
He was going to be stuck there, immobilized, as he watched his mentor, his teacher, and his grandfather die slowly before him. The hoary old man seemed to barely have any strength anymore and Harry almost wished Malfoy would just take his life and spare him the pain. He never thought he would want that, but seeing it clearly, the effect that the poison was having on the old man's body was just to horrifying to witness.
There was a lull in activity in the tower as Malfoy completely lowered his wand with a frightened look. If Harry had half a heart it would have gone out to the blonde but then his entire mind was focused on the fact that the door had just burst open emitting four masked Death Eaters and of all people, Snape.
Snape's mind was still reeling when he burst through the door at the top of the tower. He'd had no warning of the attack, not even a hint of what was to come. And now he was faced with the hardest decision of his life.
Kill Dumbledore and lose his soul, or break his vow to Narcissa and lose his life.
Dumbledore's eyes met his and Snape's heart shattered into a million pieces. "Severus...please..." Dumbledore said, pleading with Severus to do what he knew he had to do, his soul be damned.
Snape steeled himself, shutting down all emotion, before raising his wand.
"Avada Kedavra!" he cried, his voice steady, despite his inner turmoil. With those two simple words, his friend, the only man who had ever believed him and seen his worth, was dead, and there was nothing he could do to bring him back.
There was a pause where no one moved as Dumbledore's body fell from the tower. Harry's heart fell to his stomach and then time sped up again like a twisted version of a girl's jewelry box wound too tight.
The Death Eaters- Dumbledore had called them by name, but Harry scarcely remembered them now- along with Snape and Malfoy were the only people moving in the room. . Snape had Malfoy by the collar of his robes and was forcing him out of the room.
They had disappeared from sight before Harry realized one important fact. He was free. The Immobulus charm was broken with Dumbledore's death. With every ounce of grief he could muster, he propelled himself out the door, invisibility cloak be damned.
Every inch of him ached as he ran down the steps of Hogwarts castle and he was certain he was crying but he didn't have time to dwell on this further. He pushed himself to go faster as he made it out the entrance hall onto the darkened grounds.
"SNAPE!" He hollered pouring all his grief, frustration and anger into that one word.
"Damn it, Potter," Snape growled low. "Run, Draco!" he yelled, his top priority was getting Draco safely away. There was going to be hell to pay for him with the Dark Lord and Snape couldn't leave him alone for long.
Snape whirled, wand held high. "What?! Unless you're going to kill me, Potter, I do not have time for this!"
"Make time, Snape!" Harry spat out angrily.
"Self involved brat," Snape growled, his eyes darting around looking for danger in the chaos while jabbing his other hand into his robes. Pulling his hand out, Snape stalked over to Harry and shoved his wand up underneath his chin. "I'm going to hand you a paper, Potter. Memorize the address. The paper will dissolve in 30 seconds. Make fast use of that feeble brain of yours, and show it to NO ONE!" he emphasized with a hiss, shoving the paper into Potter's hand.
Snape stepped back in time to see three Death Eaters running their way. "Now run, you fool," he ordered, raising his wand he sent a stinging hex at Potter.
Harry clutched the paper tightly in his hand as he dodged the hex that was sent his way. He whirled around and cast Incendio, but his aim was off and it hit the ground by Snape's feet. Now he only had ten seconds to memorize a piece of paper as he ran back towards the castle.
He unwrinkled it as he pelted faster across the grounds. It was an address, just as Snape had said, half of him was relieved that it hadn't exploded in his face yet. The address was simple enough to memorize: 7 Eremite Lane. That was it. No instructions, no indication as to what that meant just an address and Harry? He memorized it like it was the last thing he would ever see.
But soon enough something else caught his eyes. His stomach clenched painfully as he scrambled forward towards Hagrid's hut. The piece of parchment dissolved into ash in his hands and he let it go. He stumbled toward the burning house as an enormous figure emerged from out of the flames carrying Fang on his back. With a thankful cry, Harry sank to his knees; he was shaking in every limb, his body ached all over, and his breath came in painful stabs.
Snape watched Harry long enough to ensure none of the other Death Eaters would be stupid enough to attack Harry before turning tail running after Draco. He had to get Draco somewhere safe, somewhere the Dark Lord could not find him. Dumbledore's secondary goal had been to prevent Draco from taking that last step, committing full out murder, and now it fell to Snape to keep Draco alive, while still keeping himself in the Dark Lord's good graces.
He reached the apparation point to find Draco waiting for him with wide eyed with panic.
"Professor?" Draco asked, looking around him as the others began to disapparate.
"Not a word," Snape hissed, and grabbing on to Draco, he apparated the two of them away.
*****
"Yeh all righ', Harry? Yeh all righ'? Speak ter me, Harry..."
Hagrid's huge, hairy face was swimming above Harry, blocking out the stars. Harry could smell burnt wood and dog hair; he put out a hand and felt Fang's reassuringly warm and alive body quivering beside him.
"I'm all right," panted Harry. "Are you?"
"'Course I am...take more'n that ter finish me."
Hagrid put his hands under Harry's arms and raised him up with such force that Harry's feet momentarily left the ground before Hagrid set him upright again. He could see blood trickling down Hagrid's cheek from a deep cut under one eye, which was swelling rapidly.
"We should put out your house," said Harry, "the charm's 'Aguamenti'..."
"Knew it was summat like that," mumbled Hagrid, and he raised a smoldering pink, flowery umbrella tip. Harry raised his wand arm, which felt like lead, and murmured "Aguamenti" too. Together, he and Hagrid poured water on the house until the last flame was extinguished.
"S'not too bad," said Hagrid hopefully a few minutes later, looking at the smoking wreck. "Nothin' Dumbledore won' be able to put righ'..."
Harry froze. He forgot. No one knew yet, no one but him, Malfoy, Snape, and a few Death Eaters. He couldn't tell Hagrid who killed Dumbledore. It would be betraying Dumbledore and Snape's trust and he wasn't going to refuse a dead man's request, but he couldn't just leave Hagrid to his delusions. Harry ached, searing pain rent through his stomach at his impossible task. Just hearing the old man's name hurt, but the knowledge that he was the only one left at Hogwarts who knew why scared him more than anything.
"Hagrid..."
"I was bindin' up a couple o' bowtruckle legs when I heard 'em comin'," said Hagrid sadly, still staring at his wrecked cabin. "They'll've bin burnt ter twigs, poor little things..."
"Hagrid..."
"But what happened, Harry? I jus' saw them Death Eaters runnin' down from the castle, but what the ruddy hell was Snape doin' with 'em? Where's he gone-was he chasin' them?"
Harry cleared his throat nervously. He had rather hoped no one had seen Snape flee with Malfoy but obviously someone more than hated him today.
"He..." He coughed, panic flooding his senses. He looked around the scorch marked ground looking for anything, anything that could help him explain away what Hagrid saw, but then Hagrid supplied it for him.
"What musta happened was, Dumbledore musta told Snape ter go with them Death Eaters," Hagrid said confidently. "I suppose he's gotta keep his cover. Look, let's get yeh back up ter the school. Come on, Harry..."
"Yeah," agreed Harry quickly. He silently thanked whoever was listening for Rubeus Hagrid and his sense of loyalty. "I didn't even see him leave." He winced at his own lie. The one person he didn't want to ever have to lie to again was Hagrid. The giant of a man would find out the partial truth soon enough...too soon, in his opinion.
As they headed back towards the castle, Harry's mind drifted. Hagrid would lead him if he fell off course. In his mind he could see all the students talking in hushed whispers about how Death Eaters had gotten in and the Dark Mark was hanging above the school. Cruelly, the green glowing bright against the night sky mocked him and his long list of failures that evening.
He could have prevented Dumbledore's death from happening this soon. He could have stopped feeding the poison to the old man. Dumbledore might have hated his cowardice but at least he would have lived to see another night. He would have been here now to guide the students through this scare. Surely Dumbledore's disappointment would be easier to cope with, easier to deal with than this.
Harry wrapped his arms around himself tightly and squeezed his eyes shut as the world began to tilt in an alarming fashion. Everything was moving too fast, and the weight of what had happened crashed down around him. Snape...he had killed Dumbledore. Dumbledore was dead. Dumbledore's body would be resting at the base of the tallest tower, completely still.
"What're they all lookin' at?"
Hagrid's voice broke through Harry's spiraling thoughts and brought his attention back to the present. Harry felt nauseous as Hagrid started to steer him towards the foot of the Astronomy Tower. There was a small crowd gathering at its base and Harry struggled against Hagrid's grasp, but if the half-giant noticed, he didn't let him go.
In an oddly detached way, Harry allowed himself to be pushed through the crowd to the front. But now that he was already there, he found himself continuing on and crouched down beside Dumbledore. He had known there was no hope from the moment that the full Immobulus charm Dumbledore had placed upon him lifted, known that it could have happened only because the caster was dead. There was still no preparation for seeing him here, spread-eagled, broken: the greatest wizard Harry had ever, or would ever, meet.
Dumbledore's eyes were closed; but for the strange angle of his arms and legs, he might have been sleeping. Harry reached out, straightened the half-moon spectacles upon the crooked nose, and wiped a trickle of blood from the mouth with his own sleeve. Then he gazed down at the wise old face and tried to absorb the enormous and incomprehensible truth: that never again would Dumbledore speak to him, never again could he help...
He let out a shaky breath, close to tears, but none were forthcoming. He wanted to hit the man, wanted to break him as if he could feel it for leaving him like this. There were still so many questions he had left unanswered and the biggest mystery of all was Snape.
As he moved to stand on unsteady legs, he realized he had been kneeling on something aside from the ground. It was the locket, the one that had been so important only hours ago and now didn't even seem worth the effort they put into it. He picked it up, turning it over and over in his hands and realizing the flaw with it. There were no markings of any kind marring the surface, from his perspective it was a perfectly ordinary locket. The ornate "S" that was supposed to be gracing the back wasn't there. Slowly, he began to realize what this meant. This wasn't the right locket.
His hands were trembling badly as he fumbled with the clasp and it sprung open. It was empty save for a tiny scrap of parchment that he pulled out now. He pocketed it, not having the heart to read the note that told him beyond a shadow of a doubt that this wasn't the Horcrux. Dumbledore had drunk a basin full of poisoning, weakened himself beyond repair, for a cheap muggle trinket.
Then, suddenly, a soft hand slipped into his own, breaking his dazed stare. He allowed himself to be pulled away from the dead corpse without complaint. The sight sickened him now. He was beginning to wonder if Dumbledore had known this from the start. If he had known that tonight’s escapade would be fruitless. If, deep down, the old man had copped out on him, just when he was truly beginning to understand what it was he needed to do.
Ginny was leading him in silence back towards the castle, he realized in the midst of his thoughts.
"Where are we going?" he whispered brokenly. She paused mid-step and looked at him as if he were about to collapse.
"Hospital wing."
"I'm not hurt."
"It's McGonagall’s orders,” said Ginny. “Everyone’s up there, Ron, Hermione, Lupin, everyone-”
Harry nodded, fear creeping into his heart and grasping it in a strangle hold. It hadn't even occurred to him that others could have been hurt or worse- dead.
He followed Ginny in worried silence and found himself entering into chaos unlike he had ever seen. Hermione came flying out of nowhere and embraced him roughly. For once, he didn't mind, because it meant she was alive. He returned her embrace and nobody said anything for a moment. Lupin was making his way over to him worriedly, but Harry's gaze was already on a bed not too far from where he was standing. Bill was lying on it, his face almost completely unrecognizable. Madame Pomfrey was rubbing some sort of disgusting smelling ointment on his face.
"Why aren't you using a charm...or something?" he asked when the matron caught his gaze. He recalled his encounter with Malfoy and how Snape had been able to mend the blonde's wounds easily with a spell.
"Nothing seems to be working on these," Madame Pomfrey answered with a deeply troubled expression. "I've tried everything I know, but there is no cure for werewolf bites."
"But he wasn't bitten at the full moon," said Ron, who was gazing down at his brother's face as though he could somehow force him to mend just by staring. "Greyback hadn't transformed, so surely Bill won't be a - a real -?"
Harry's heart sunk at this. The news of how Bill's face got this way struck him hard. The face of the deranged man entered his mind; Harry pushed it out as he focused back in on the conversation at hand. Thinking about Fenrir Greyback brought back the harsh notion of Dumbledore's untimely demise and once again back to his own problem and he only wanted to be worried with the rest of the Weasleys. He didn't want his sodding destiny anymore. All he could think about was what he would have to do at the end of the year. Dumbledore had sacrificed himself for Harry so he could continue on and he would not disappoint the old man again.
“Dumbledore might know something that'd work, though," Ron said. "Where is he? Bill fought those maniacs on Dumbledore's orders, Dumbledore owes him, he can't leave him in this state-"
"Ron, Dumbledore's dead," said Ginny.
"No!" Lupin looked wildly from Ginny to Harry as though hoping the latter might contradict her, but when Harry did not, Lupin collapsed into a chair beside Bill's bed, his hands over his face. Harry had never seen Lupin lose control before; he felt as though he was intruding upon something private, indecent. He turned away and caught Ron's eye instead, exchanging in silence a look that confirmed what Ginny had said.
"How did he die?" whispered Tonks. "How did it happen?"
"S..." Harry paused choking on the word. He had almost slipped up. Anxious faces were peering at him and he had to give them some answer. "A-a Death Eater killed him," true enough he supposed but these people were his family and he had to give them more than that. "We had just returned when we saw the Dark Mark above the Astronomy Tower. We went there and Dumbledore...he was ill, weak, but he must have known it was a trap because he immobilized me. I was under my invisibility cloak, and there were footsteps running up- and then Malfoy came through the door and disarmed him-"
Harry was vaguely aware of the horrified and disgusted faces of his audience as he spun his warped tale.
"More Death Eaters arrived and then one of them raised their wand and did it- the killing curse."
Harry trailed off, drained. He couldn't go on even if he wanted to without giving something away. They seemed to realize this as well. Their faces were pale and drawn and Ginny was hugging him this time. He rested his chin against her shoulder, his arms going around her waist. No one was all right.
Somewhere in the distance a phoenix was singing. The song rang true to his soul, and for the first time that day, Harry let himself cry.
Next Chapter: Chapter Three
Authors:faynia and stormypup
Rating: R
Categories: Romance, Action/Adventure
Warnings: Harry's 17, so he's not at the age of legal consent
Summary: What if Dumbledore told Harry that he was dying, and what Snape's role was in it all. What if Harry then had to depend on the person he hated most in the world to honor Dumbledore's dying wishes?
Answers Challenge: Written for Wave XII of the Harry/Snape fest , What if… challenge.
Previous Chapters: Chapter One
Disclaimers: In the first few chapters we quoted liberally from HBP. All HP characters and their universe belong to J.K. Rowling and the WB, not us.
A/N: I'd like to thank my beta reader hannibal_topaz for sticking by me and stormypup and not being repelled by our horrible botching of the English language.
Also, I'd like to thank all those who left us comments on the last chapter. They filled us with warm fuzzies on these very cold January days.
Chapter Two
Harry wanted to kick and scream as he watched them, but he couldn't move and he couldn’t speak. He just couldn't stand it. The ferret was trembling and shaking and backing down, but Harry couldn't tear his eyes away from Dumbledore's frail frame. The old man was quaking and the light that shone brightly through his eyes was fading rapidly. Harry's heart missed a beat. This was it. This was what Dumbledore had tried to warn him of earlier and it wasn't anymore fair now than it had been then.
He was going to be stuck there, immobilized, as he watched his mentor, his teacher, and his grandfather die slowly before him. The hoary old man seemed to barely have any strength anymore and Harry almost wished Malfoy would just take his life and spare him the pain. He never thought he would want that, but seeing it clearly, the effect that the poison was having on the old man's body was just to horrifying to witness.
There was a lull in activity in the tower as Malfoy completely lowered his wand with a frightened look. If Harry had half a heart it would have gone out to the blonde but then his entire mind was focused on the fact that the door had just burst open emitting four masked Death Eaters and of all people, Snape.
Snape's mind was still reeling when he burst through the door at the top of the tower. He'd had no warning of the attack, not even a hint of what was to come. And now he was faced with the hardest decision of his life.
Kill Dumbledore and lose his soul, or break his vow to Narcissa and lose his life.
Dumbledore's eyes met his and Snape's heart shattered into a million pieces. "Severus...please..." Dumbledore said, pleading with Severus to do what he knew he had to do, his soul be damned.
Snape steeled himself, shutting down all emotion, before raising his wand.
"Avada Kedavra!" he cried, his voice steady, despite his inner turmoil. With those two simple words, his friend, the only man who had ever believed him and seen his worth, was dead, and there was nothing he could do to bring him back.
There was a pause where no one moved as Dumbledore's body fell from the tower. Harry's heart fell to his stomach and then time sped up again like a twisted version of a girl's jewelry box wound too tight.
The Death Eaters- Dumbledore had called them by name, but Harry scarcely remembered them now- along with Snape and Malfoy were the only people moving in the room. . Snape had Malfoy by the collar of his robes and was forcing him out of the room.
They had disappeared from sight before Harry realized one important fact. He was free. The Immobulus charm was broken with Dumbledore's death. With every ounce of grief he could muster, he propelled himself out the door, invisibility cloak be damned.
Every inch of him ached as he ran down the steps of Hogwarts castle and he was certain he was crying but he didn't have time to dwell on this further. He pushed himself to go faster as he made it out the entrance hall onto the darkened grounds.
"SNAPE!" He hollered pouring all his grief, frustration and anger into that one word.
"Damn it, Potter," Snape growled low. "Run, Draco!" he yelled, his top priority was getting Draco safely away. There was going to be hell to pay for him with the Dark Lord and Snape couldn't leave him alone for long.
Snape whirled, wand held high. "What?! Unless you're going to kill me, Potter, I do not have time for this!"
"Make time, Snape!" Harry spat out angrily.
"Self involved brat," Snape growled, his eyes darting around looking for danger in the chaos while jabbing his other hand into his robes. Pulling his hand out, Snape stalked over to Harry and shoved his wand up underneath his chin. "I'm going to hand you a paper, Potter. Memorize the address. The paper will dissolve in 30 seconds. Make fast use of that feeble brain of yours, and show it to NO ONE!" he emphasized with a hiss, shoving the paper into Potter's hand.
Snape stepped back in time to see three Death Eaters running their way. "Now run, you fool," he ordered, raising his wand he sent a stinging hex at Potter.
Harry clutched the paper tightly in his hand as he dodged the hex that was sent his way. He whirled around and cast Incendio, but his aim was off and it hit the ground by Snape's feet. Now he only had ten seconds to memorize a piece of paper as he ran back towards the castle.
He unwrinkled it as he pelted faster across the grounds. It was an address, just as Snape had said, half of him was relieved that it hadn't exploded in his face yet. The address was simple enough to memorize: 7 Eremite Lane. That was it. No instructions, no indication as to what that meant just an address and Harry? He memorized it like it was the last thing he would ever see.
But soon enough something else caught his eyes. His stomach clenched painfully as he scrambled forward towards Hagrid's hut. The piece of parchment dissolved into ash in his hands and he let it go. He stumbled toward the burning house as an enormous figure emerged from out of the flames carrying Fang on his back. With a thankful cry, Harry sank to his knees; he was shaking in every limb, his body ached all over, and his breath came in painful stabs.
Snape watched Harry long enough to ensure none of the other Death Eaters would be stupid enough to attack Harry before turning tail running after Draco. He had to get Draco somewhere safe, somewhere the Dark Lord could not find him. Dumbledore's secondary goal had been to prevent Draco from taking that last step, committing full out murder, and now it fell to Snape to keep Draco alive, while still keeping himself in the Dark Lord's good graces.
He reached the apparation point to find Draco waiting for him with wide eyed with panic.
"Professor?" Draco asked, looking around him as the others began to disapparate.
"Not a word," Snape hissed, and grabbing on to Draco, he apparated the two of them away.
*****
"Yeh all righ', Harry? Yeh all righ'? Speak ter me, Harry..."
Hagrid's huge, hairy face was swimming above Harry, blocking out the stars. Harry could smell burnt wood and dog hair; he put out a hand and felt Fang's reassuringly warm and alive body quivering beside him.
"I'm all right," panted Harry. "Are you?"
"'Course I am...take more'n that ter finish me."
Hagrid put his hands under Harry's arms and raised him up with such force that Harry's feet momentarily left the ground before Hagrid set him upright again. He could see blood trickling down Hagrid's cheek from a deep cut under one eye, which was swelling rapidly.
"We should put out your house," said Harry, "the charm's 'Aguamenti'..."
"Knew it was summat like that," mumbled Hagrid, and he raised a smoldering pink, flowery umbrella tip. Harry raised his wand arm, which felt like lead, and murmured "Aguamenti" too. Together, he and Hagrid poured water on the house until the last flame was extinguished.
"S'not too bad," said Hagrid hopefully a few minutes later, looking at the smoking wreck. "Nothin' Dumbledore won' be able to put righ'..."
Harry froze. He forgot. No one knew yet, no one but him, Malfoy, Snape, and a few Death Eaters. He couldn't tell Hagrid who killed Dumbledore. It would be betraying Dumbledore and Snape's trust and he wasn't going to refuse a dead man's request, but he couldn't just leave Hagrid to his delusions. Harry ached, searing pain rent through his stomach at his impossible task. Just hearing the old man's name hurt, but the knowledge that he was the only one left at Hogwarts who knew why scared him more than anything.
"Hagrid..."
"I was bindin' up a couple o' bowtruckle legs when I heard 'em comin'," said Hagrid sadly, still staring at his wrecked cabin. "They'll've bin burnt ter twigs, poor little things..."
"Hagrid..."
"But what happened, Harry? I jus' saw them Death Eaters runnin' down from the castle, but what the ruddy hell was Snape doin' with 'em? Where's he gone-was he chasin' them?"
Harry cleared his throat nervously. He had rather hoped no one had seen Snape flee with Malfoy but obviously someone more than hated him today.
"He..." He coughed, panic flooding his senses. He looked around the scorch marked ground looking for anything, anything that could help him explain away what Hagrid saw, but then Hagrid supplied it for him.
"What musta happened was, Dumbledore musta told Snape ter go with them Death Eaters," Hagrid said confidently. "I suppose he's gotta keep his cover. Look, let's get yeh back up ter the school. Come on, Harry..."
"Yeah," agreed Harry quickly. He silently thanked whoever was listening for Rubeus Hagrid and his sense of loyalty. "I didn't even see him leave." He winced at his own lie. The one person he didn't want to ever have to lie to again was Hagrid. The giant of a man would find out the partial truth soon enough...too soon, in his opinion.
As they headed back towards the castle, Harry's mind drifted. Hagrid would lead him if he fell off course. In his mind he could see all the students talking in hushed whispers about how Death Eaters had gotten in and the Dark Mark was hanging above the school. Cruelly, the green glowing bright against the night sky mocked him and his long list of failures that evening.
He could have prevented Dumbledore's death from happening this soon. He could have stopped feeding the poison to the old man. Dumbledore might have hated his cowardice but at least he would have lived to see another night. He would have been here now to guide the students through this scare. Surely Dumbledore's disappointment would be easier to cope with, easier to deal with than this.
Harry wrapped his arms around himself tightly and squeezed his eyes shut as the world began to tilt in an alarming fashion. Everything was moving too fast, and the weight of what had happened crashed down around him. Snape...he had killed Dumbledore. Dumbledore was dead. Dumbledore's body would be resting at the base of the tallest tower, completely still.
"What're they all lookin' at?"
Hagrid's voice broke through Harry's spiraling thoughts and brought his attention back to the present. Harry felt nauseous as Hagrid started to steer him towards the foot of the Astronomy Tower. There was a small crowd gathering at its base and Harry struggled against Hagrid's grasp, but if the half-giant noticed, he didn't let him go.
In an oddly detached way, Harry allowed himself to be pushed through the crowd to the front. But now that he was already there, he found himself continuing on and crouched down beside Dumbledore. He had known there was no hope from the moment that the full Immobulus charm Dumbledore had placed upon him lifted, known that it could have happened only because the caster was dead. There was still no preparation for seeing him here, spread-eagled, broken: the greatest wizard Harry had ever, or would ever, meet.
Dumbledore's eyes were closed; but for the strange angle of his arms and legs, he might have been sleeping. Harry reached out, straightened the half-moon spectacles upon the crooked nose, and wiped a trickle of blood from the mouth with his own sleeve. Then he gazed down at the wise old face and tried to absorb the enormous and incomprehensible truth: that never again would Dumbledore speak to him, never again could he help...
He let out a shaky breath, close to tears, but none were forthcoming. He wanted to hit the man, wanted to break him as if he could feel it for leaving him like this. There were still so many questions he had left unanswered and the biggest mystery of all was Snape.
As he moved to stand on unsteady legs, he realized he had been kneeling on something aside from the ground. It was the locket, the one that had been so important only hours ago and now didn't even seem worth the effort they put into it. He picked it up, turning it over and over in his hands and realizing the flaw with it. There were no markings of any kind marring the surface, from his perspective it was a perfectly ordinary locket. The ornate "S" that was supposed to be gracing the back wasn't there. Slowly, he began to realize what this meant. This wasn't the right locket.
His hands were trembling badly as he fumbled with the clasp and it sprung open. It was empty save for a tiny scrap of parchment that he pulled out now. He pocketed it, not having the heart to read the note that told him beyond a shadow of a doubt that this wasn't the Horcrux. Dumbledore had drunk a basin full of poisoning, weakened himself beyond repair, for a cheap muggle trinket.
Then, suddenly, a soft hand slipped into his own, breaking his dazed stare. He allowed himself to be pulled away from the dead corpse without complaint. The sight sickened him now. He was beginning to wonder if Dumbledore had known this from the start. If he had known that tonight’s escapade would be fruitless. If, deep down, the old man had copped out on him, just when he was truly beginning to understand what it was he needed to do.
Ginny was leading him in silence back towards the castle, he realized in the midst of his thoughts.
"Where are we going?" he whispered brokenly. She paused mid-step and looked at him as if he were about to collapse.
"Hospital wing."
"I'm not hurt."
"It's McGonagall’s orders,” said Ginny. “Everyone’s up there, Ron, Hermione, Lupin, everyone-”
Harry nodded, fear creeping into his heart and grasping it in a strangle hold. It hadn't even occurred to him that others could have been hurt or worse- dead.
He followed Ginny in worried silence and found himself entering into chaos unlike he had ever seen. Hermione came flying out of nowhere and embraced him roughly. For once, he didn't mind, because it meant she was alive. He returned her embrace and nobody said anything for a moment. Lupin was making his way over to him worriedly, but Harry's gaze was already on a bed not too far from where he was standing. Bill was lying on it, his face almost completely unrecognizable. Madame Pomfrey was rubbing some sort of disgusting smelling ointment on his face.
"Why aren't you using a charm...or something?" he asked when the matron caught his gaze. He recalled his encounter with Malfoy and how Snape had been able to mend the blonde's wounds easily with a spell.
"Nothing seems to be working on these," Madame Pomfrey answered with a deeply troubled expression. "I've tried everything I know, but there is no cure for werewolf bites."
"But he wasn't bitten at the full moon," said Ron, who was gazing down at his brother's face as though he could somehow force him to mend just by staring. "Greyback hadn't transformed, so surely Bill won't be a - a real -?"
Harry's heart sunk at this. The news of how Bill's face got this way struck him hard. The face of the deranged man entered his mind; Harry pushed it out as he focused back in on the conversation at hand. Thinking about Fenrir Greyback brought back the harsh notion of Dumbledore's untimely demise and once again back to his own problem and he only wanted to be worried with the rest of the Weasleys. He didn't want his sodding destiny anymore. All he could think about was what he would have to do at the end of the year. Dumbledore had sacrificed himself for Harry so he could continue on and he would not disappoint the old man again.
“Dumbledore might know something that'd work, though," Ron said. "Where is he? Bill fought those maniacs on Dumbledore's orders, Dumbledore owes him, he can't leave him in this state-"
"Ron, Dumbledore's dead," said Ginny.
"No!" Lupin looked wildly from Ginny to Harry as though hoping the latter might contradict her, but when Harry did not, Lupin collapsed into a chair beside Bill's bed, his hands over his face. Harry had never seen Lupin lose control before; he felt as though he was intruding upon something private, indecent. He turned away and caught Ron's eye instead, exchanging in silence a look that confirmed what Ginny had said.
"How did he die?" whispered Tonks. "How did it happen?"
"S..." Harry paused choking on the word. He had almost slipped up. Anxious faces were peering at him and he had to give them some answer. "A-a Death Eater killed him," true enough he supposed but these people were his family and he had to give them more than that. "We had just returned when we saw the Dark Mark above the Astronomy Tower. We went there and Dumbledore...he was ill, weak, but he must have known it was a trap because he immobilized me. I was under my invisibility cloak, and there were footsteps running up- and then Malfoy came through the door and disarmed him-"
Harry was vaguely aware of the horrified and disgusted faces of his audience as he spun his warped tale.
"More Death Eaters arrived and then one of them raised their wand and did it- the killing curse."
Harry trailed off, drained. He couldn't go on even if he wanted to without giving something away. They seemed to realize this as well. Their faces were pale and drawn and Ginny was hugging him this time. He rested his chin against her shoulder, his arms going around her waist. No one was all right.
Somewhere in the distance a phoenix was singing. The song rang true to his soul, and for the first time that day, Harry let himself cry.
Next Chapter: Chapter Three