SOMEWHERE 2/4
Title: Somewhere (2/4)
Paring: Myungsoo (L) x Sungjong [Infinite]
Genre: Romance, Drama, Humor
Rating: G to NC17
Summary: This is a Notting Hill AU written for the pairing. Does not generally follow the entire premise of the story but is heavily inspired by it. Kim Myungsoo, was once a bright and wild kid but because of an incident, He quits the spotlight and becomes an owner of a bookstore and uses his time to write. In comes Kim Sungjong, the “it” guy from the music industry. They meet one day and nothing is ever the same. This story is about dreams and what does fame means. And if Love will really prevail despite of everything.
Disclaimer: This work of fiction is inspired by the film Notting Hill. Scenarios and dialogue and everything else is mine. The characters/real life people I am basing them off are not mine. I do not mean any disrespect to them. I do not profit from this.
The first thing he registers in his mind is that he has a horrid crick in his neck. Second he is not in his room. Third, there is a warm body pressed against him. It does not compute in his head so he opens his eyes and discovers that everything is true. Sungjong is asleep, his arms over his body, pulling him close. Clinging to him. He suddenly feels hot all over but he can’t just pull away without waking him. Thankfully, sungjong chooses this time to stir and his eyes flutter open.
He half falls in love with him at that very moment.
He had a few relationships under his belt and they were all convenient and happy. A lot of good moments but he doesn’t remember feeling something similar to this. He always thought that love was something you have to work on, that it takes time. He had no idea that sometimes, It can spring out of nowhere. That love can come from something so ordinary. People fall and get infatuated with actors, models and musicians partly because of the illusion they create. It’s human nature to long for something you cannot have. But this, just looking at him opening his eyes from deep slumber- his heart flutters and settles down in a stretch of a minute.
“ Good morning, ” Sungjong tells him and he manages an awkward half-smile.
“ It’s a bit late, 7.” He says and is relieved that it’s a Saturday so they won’t open till 9 am.
“I’m sorry, I fell asleep, I really just wanted to take a short nap. ” he tells him,
“ no, it’s okay. Really. Uh, we should probably have breakfast or something.”
“ agreed.” He replies and they both stand up, loosening their limbs and checking their phones. Myungsoo receives a lot of email from his friends and he couldn’t help but laugh about all of them. They knew he will turn his phone off or delete all his messages but there is something about emails that he cannot resist to read them.
I CAN’T BELIEVE IT. I just attended a great party and met sungjong, I think we are friends now. We are, right? I am so happy for you.
-Jiae
Thanks for coming man!
You brought the biggest surprise with your boy toy!
I knew you had it in you. You are incredibly good looking and shit,
That kid had no chance!
-woohyun
You will tell me everything.
Stop obsessing and just smile more.
Also, don’t start talking about your love for photography.
I know you love it, take pictures of him. But don’t be too creepy!
Don’t tell about the exposures and all that stuff. I will come down to your house, just as soon as I’m done teaching these kids. Okay!
-sungyeol
MAN! We did not talk that much last night. Tablo wanted to talk to you but he gave you space cause you had sungjong with you.
He did not want to recruit you into acting, don’t worry. He just wants to see you.
He cares about you, He’s like your older brother.
-dongwoo
They all pestered me to send you an email so this is it.
Just be happy myungsoo, I am here for you. You two look good together. Unlike those idiots, I know that you are not in a relationship.
But I know this is faster than expected.
But I think, it’s a good thing.
- sunggyu
His face flushes, are his friends that invested in his love life? Sungjong looks at him and he asks him where he wants to get breakfast.
“ I prefer to stay in” he answers and it dawns on him, ofcourse, people might stare at them.
“ want to eat at my house?” He asks and runs his head if his house is clean and his pantry is stocked. They can’t go inside a grocery store. Last night, woohyun added guards and made sure no one took a picture with sungjong rather than his friends.
“ that’s a plan.”
They drive to his house and he can’t believe they will be spending time in his house again. He hates it when people come over (except his family) but for sungjong, it comes naturally.
He busies himself in the kitchen and sungjong helps him out. They decide on omelette and bacon plus orange juice. Ofcourse, Sungjong also has to be a good cook and kitchen efficient.
“ what? ” sungjong asks.
“ nothing, it’s just that I didn’t expect you to be this domestic.” He states plainly and Sungjong punches his arm.
“ I wasn’t born a superstar or anything. I had to do the usual chores at home.”
“ really, so, how about your movie shoot? Aren’t you supposed to be on set?”
“ No. I have Friday and Saturday off, I work on Sunday to Thursday.” He says back and fills the plate with bacon.
“ Your location is not that far from work,” he says and realizes what he just implied.
“ so, does that mean you will come visit me on set?”
“ maybe,” he replies and steals one strip, tasting it.
“ you won’t get to eat anymore if you don’t visit me.”
How can he say no to that? He nods and Sungjong jumps up in glee. They eat the food in silence, both of them not realizing how hungry they really are. Myungsoo argues with himself if he should ask him to stay and spend the day together. He is not ready to let him go yet. But what if he has some plans?
“ any plans today?” he asks casually and Sungjong shakes his head no.
“ I will be going to a nearby forest, for a shoot.” He says and explains more. “ I am a photographer, not professionally though. Just for myself and for a portfolio that no one will ever see.” He rambles.
“ well, thank god, the camera loves me.” Sungjong responds and He feels relaxed. He said yes. He will get to spend a day with him again.
“ So, should I drop you off your hotel first?”
“ Yes, I also need some emails and probably call a few people then we can go and do your photoshoot.” He adds and they fall back to eating.
Everything seemed so natural. For the past years, he spent his time in here, eating breakfast all alone. But now, he is sharing space with someone. Technically, they are not sharing any space but still. He stares at sungjong and wants to hold him close, probably push him to his bed and keep him there. He coughs violently as he realized what he just thought and sungjong looks at him, concerned.
“ you okay? ”
“ yeah, you done? We should get going.”
They get back to the car and he knows the hotel where sungjong is staying in. As they arrive, everyone is professional enough to not ask for a picture and a photograph. That is because they entered at the back because there are fans lined outside, waiting to see sungjong.
“ this is crazy,” he tells him.
“ Yes, I admire the dedication really. But I say hi and they see me when I do the shooting, but it’s my day off, so I hide from them.” Sungjong confesses.
The room, a penthouse. No surprise there. He remembers staying places like this all the time during his time as an actor. As a kid, It was the most amazing thing for him. Sungjong busies himself first with a computer and sends emails. He takes his script with him , saying that he will study it. Finally, he goes to shower while Myungsoo looks out the window and looks around. He spots a CD, INFINITE. He reminds himself to buy one. Jiae told him that sungjong writes the lyrics so he feels like he needs to listen to it.
Sungjong comes out and it does not take him long to be ready. He looks as radiant as ever and Myungsoo feels embarrassed cause he took longer to get ready.
“ this is unbelievable,” sungjong suddenly says, “ you are so handsome.” He says in wonder and Myungsoo flushes.
“ shut up, I will still drive you around town,”
“ No. really. I have seen a lot of people, but you are different. ” he seems so honest about all this that myungsoo just looks away.
“ it’s not important,” he says.
Really. All those years of being vain about himself and being too proud about his looks are over. They seem so far, those days that everyone gushed about him and he will hold his head high, thinking that he is better than everyone. It all seems so childish now. More than ever, he hates being judged with his looks. No one will take him seriously. Expecting him to be dumb and be nothing more than a pretty face.
“ so, should we go now?” Sungjong asks and he says yes, he cannot wait to show sungjong the forest. It’s almost an hour drive, but it would be worth it.
//
“ this is amazing! ”
Sungjong says and Myungsoo sighs in relief. Funny enough, they spend the day exploring the wilderness and taking pictures. It’s not a surprise, Myungsoo tells himself, that Sungjong is the perfect subject. No wonder he is a star and jiae shrieks over him. They take a break after two hours and eat quietly.
“ so, you go to work tomorrow?” Myungsoo asks and passes him a can of soda.
“ Yes. ” Sungjong says immediately and turns to him. “ Thank you for this, really. You know what? Why don’t you come on set? It’s- ” he stops short and continues. “ it should be fun for you, you can take pictures and stuff.”
Myungsoo studies him, is he seriously embarrassed? He does not try and explain the behaviour.
“ Okay, I’ll go-” he says and sungjong jumps in joy. Literally.
“ That would be great! It’s just that, the band is not with me- so, and everyone is just.” He makes a face and myungsoo gets it.
“ obnoxious? Full of themselves? Rude?” he states and sungjong laughs, “ you can tell me to stop when I figure the right word”
“ I know I should be happy and all, you know, with this opportunity. But I have no idea when it comes to making movies. It’s completely different. And I get homesick all over again.” His voice is solemn and a bit confused at the same time. Myungsoo wants to tell him that it’s alright, that it would get better. But he never uses that phrase anymore. He knows, in a way what it’s like to be in the business. Though he never got into acting.
“ I’m boring you, sorry.” Sungjong says and smiles at him, trying to change the mood.
“ No, it’s okay. You can tell me what’s bothering you. We’re friends.” He offers and wants to whack himself repeatedly after. When did he get so bad at flirting? He admits he is not good at relationships, but in his past, he can flirt like a pro. Is woohyun right? He’s out of practice? (not that he has someone to practice this on, well he does now).
“ Thank you. Really, so-”
“ we have to get back, I need to look at the shop for a bit and do a bit of writing.” He says truthfully. Although he wants to spend the day with sungjong, he is working on a tight deadline for his next book.
“ I can tag along.” Sungjong replies and they both go back in the car.
As soon as they enter the bookstore, thank god the employee is the oldest two Myungsoo has. They just greet him and didn’t even bat an eyelash at sungjong, he thinks they were warned by Jiae or Woohyun. He looks at the stocks and leaves Sungjong at his office. The latter, looking very much interested with what an ordinary office looks like. He does not talk to anyone and checks his books.
His two favourite authors came out with new books and that made his day even happier. He helps in fixing the front window and tries not to explain to Mrs. Kim why he is with sungjong. But her eyes are calculating and almost judging that he eventually caves in.
“ he is a friend.” He explains as they stack the books and Mrs. Kim looks at him.
“ Jiae told me about your new boyfriend”
“ he’s not!” myungsoo half screams and he feels sorry for screaming at Mrs. Kim. “ I mean, we. Look, we are not together or what.”
“ I know, but do you want to?”
Myungsoo swears everyone in his life is so invested in him, it’s scary. Like, all of them will be disappointed all over again. Mrs. Kim is waiting for an answer and he huffs in defeat. A day in here won’t be productive at all, especially if sungjong is right there in his office.
“ I do, but right now-”
Mrs. Kim squeals. Squeals like a fourteen year old and proceeds to stack the books. There is something really wrong in here, he thinks to himself and gets to his office. Only to find sungjong, seated on his desk and he has to calm down. Really. It’s too early to be this hyped up.
“ Hi, that was quick-” sungjong says and he acts like nothing is wrong.
“ oh, it’s a weekend, I just pop in and leave.” He says and he takes his keys, a sign that they should get going. Sungjong follows and he puts his cap on.
They decide to go out and do a bit of sight seeing. Which is achievable as Sungjong is practically hidden in his cap and hoodie. Both walking and talking at the same time, like old friends and would-be lovers. Myungsoo knows something shifted from when they first met, when he spilled his coffee over him to now. Somewhere, in between that time that he introduce him to his friends and they slept in the bookshop everything changed. He now understands when people tell him about “instant connection” well, this feels like that.
It’s 7PM when they decide to call it a day and Sungjong tells him that he wants to go back at myungsoo’s house because he forgot something. What that was, he didn’t tell. The music in the car is blaring and Myungsoo can’t believe how skittish he is right now. They will be alone. Alone in his house and they are not kids to not know what happens next. Atleast, he has to kiss sungjong. The thought makes his stomach flutter.
“ you okay?” sungjong grins at him and he knows. Sungjong knows that he has that effect on him.
“ yeah.” He says roughly and Sungjong continues to smile and sing along to the music.
As we enter the house, it's like a whole new portal was opened. They did alot of side stepping and now it's time for them to do something about it. Sungjong makes a scene with rushing to the bathroom saying that, there is where he left his bracelet or something. He comes out and steps closer to Myungsoo. This is it, Myungsoo keeps repeating in hsi head and sungjong's lashes just flutter so beautifully.
He looked over at him and, this time, Myungsoo leans in and his breath catches his eyes showed a flash of nerves as Myungsoo neared him. Before he touched their lips together he tells him " You know I want you, right?"
"Yes," Sungjong replies and closes the gap between them.
His lips are insistent parting them quickly for Myungsoo. But Myungsoo slowed him down by moving his tongue gently against his, flicking it against his bottom lip and then biting it gently.
"Fuck, I want you." He pulled away from me and ran his hand along myungsoo's chest.
" eager are we," myungsoo asks and sungjong stick his tongue out in defiance.
" we could use yoour sofa, " he suggests and Myungsoo smiles, thinking that they are ready for this. whatever this is. we both pull at each other's top but myungsoo is the only one who gets his off.
Obediently, Sungjong slipped his hand around Myungsoo's side and left it on his back. Myungsoo kissed him, pressing him even further into the sofa, and letting his body slide to his right so that he was lying on his side. his right arm lay on the couch, angled around sungjong's head, and his left hand traipsed down his shirt until he reached the hem. He pulls it upward, removing it and running his hand on the younger's abdomen.
As their tongues pushed and pulled, Myungsoo smiled against his lips. He could feel him against his hip, hard and pressing into him. They continued to kiss and Myungsoo took the first step, with his hands going south and placed it over Sungjong's length. He moved his hand up and down, palming him through the thick material, he growled against his lips, and Myungsoo pulled his mouth away but continued his handiwork.
"You like that?" He whispers gently, leaning on to sungjong and whispers "I can't wait to have my hands actually on you,"
"Yes," he hissed in response to the query. His hips bucking against Myungsoo, and he smiles before kissing the collarbone and sucking lightly on the skin there. " please let me touch you," sungjong manages to say, Myungsoo acquiesced and lifted his hand.
Although it surprised Myungsoo that he was initiating things, He wanted Sungong to touch him as badly as it appeared that he wanted to. Sungjong is a mystery to him. Although his supposed fans (like jiae) would argue. He can have whoever he wants, even a fellow celebrity. But he picks him, out of everyone. a lonely author who owns a bookstore. "Whatever you want," he replies.
"I love this," Sungjong says breathily,
His tongue was on Myungsoo's skin then, and he had to work to breathe normally. Apparently, Anxious Sungjong was nowhere in the vicinity, because he followed the border of the some invinsible line on his arm, his hands tracing random designs on his chest. Myungsoo almost feels guilty that he liked the feel of his fingertips on his skin…
And then he shoved his hand down the front of Myungsoo's jeans.
Yeah. Anxious Sungjong had left the goddamned building.
"fuck," he gasped as the had wrapped around him. thank god he had a loose belt on.
"Commando, huh? I like it." Sungjong whispered against his ear as he stroked his hand slowly up and down, increasing thehardness, and then he moved his lips along Myungsoo's collarbone and dragged his tongue down the chest and around his nipples. He took a moment to suck on there, and a fucking happy sigh come from his lips.
Myungsoo knew right there that he is a goner.
As he assaulted Myungsoo's chest with kisses and licks and soft bites, he continued moving his hand up and down the shaft. Myungsoo could feel that he was going to need more room, so when he pulled awayhe snaked my hands between us and unbuttoned my jeans. folding them down over the definition of his pelvic muscles. Instantly, the cold air against his skin felt good, and Sungjong turned his face away,
They kissed slowly, and Myungsoo slid his hand into the hair on the back of Sungjong's head, gently pulling him back to the couch. he stretches his neck and response and Myungsoo pressed his lips over Sungjon's throat , sucking hard enough to elicit a response from him in the form of gasps and short breaths but not hard enough to leave a mark. He kissed him that way until they were both breathing hard, and when they both pulled away, Myungsoo says, "You're mine."
The statement was possessive; He knew that. But somehow, He knew it was true.
"Yes," Sungjong managed to reply back, and then we both heard a key in the door. "Shit," he mumbled.
I sat up and grabbed my shirt as Woohyun's voice rang out. "YOO-HOO! Myunggie, you there?"
Myungsoo growls in frustration and they both ake quick work of arranging themselves. Sungjong is quick enough because he is standing up when woohyun arrives.
" what do you want?" he whirls to see woohyun, whose face looks surprised and sungjong smiles. smiles sweetly at him, with all his innocence back in check. like minutes ago, they didn;t touch intimately.
" I have to go!" he says quickly and adds, " I had someone pick me up, from the hotel."
Woohyun adds " Yeah, man, I saw a car from -" He does not finis his sentence as Sungjong passes him by and he notices a large hickey on his neck. Then his eyes travel towards Myungsoo.
" OMG MAN! DON'T TELL ME I JUST COCKBLOCKED YOU!"
Myungsoo hissed, wanting more than ever to throw a vase at Woohyun. He fixes himself and races towards the door, but woohyun stops him.
" I am absolutely sorry man, I just came by to say thanks and-"
" woohyun." he says sternly and he stops. "shut up."
He opens the door and sees sunjong getting inside a hotel service car, he calls him out and holds his hand. Fuck. holding hands now, really? how sweet.
" Look, i'm sorry-"
Sungjong looks down, all shy and unsure. " Yeah. It was too soon, I'm sorry if i came on too quick."
" NO!" Myungsoo protested. " No, I mean. It was fine. I just, i could drive you back. I can-"
" No, it's okay. I troubled you enough. plus, you will go on set with me the next day, right? right?"
"sure." he says and he wants to lean over and kiss him but sungjong looks over at the driver. the driver clearly knows who sungjong is and it hits him. This. what they have. it's a secret. a dirty secret and he knows he deserves better. but he feels strangely fine. he will get what he can, as long as he can have sungjong a little bit longer.
" Thank you myungsoo. really. I- I left my number on your bathroom. so-" his face flushes and Myungsoo hugs him.
"" be safe. " he tells him earnestly and he gets inside the car.
Myungsoo goes back inside the house and his eyes narrow. Woohyun is holding up a piece of paper over to him with a sly grin on his face and says,
" well, what do we have here?"
" I hate you." Myungsoo retorts but there is smile on his face.
//
The next day is a Sunday, which means he has to write and look at the state of his house. If he needs anything. Waking up fairly early, 8:00 am jogs until he reaches the river. He eats breakfast and begins to write, everything goes fine till the clock strikes 1:00 pm and the number stored in his phone is still unused. Sungjong’s. He argues that Sungjong is busy and he doesn’t want him to bother him during the shoot. The man already said his worries about his co-stars and him showing up there will probably raise a lot of eyebrows.
He tries to call but his hands would not cooperate. He hears a knock on the door and he shouts to come in. Woohyun, Sunggyu and Jiae emerge in his side and he regrets his decision to let them in.
“ why are you here?” woohyun asks, incredulous.
“ this is my house,” he states.
“ you didn’t call him, you idiot.” Jiae scolded him.
“ why are you here? You should be at him studying or hanging out with your obscenely tall friends.” Myungsoo retorts and Jiae frowns.
“ they are not fun, they do the same thing over and over again. I like hanging out with your friends more,”
Woohyun grins, “ see Myunggie, we are good company. Why you deny us is a question to me.”
“ If this is about what Woohyun did last night,” Sunggyu says calmly and Myungsoo flushes immediately. Ofcourse, he told them all about the incident. He glares at woohyun who just answers by winking at him.
“ No. I have to meet my deadline for the book, I have a schedule. Okay?” he answers and turns to his computer. He finished his deadline for the day.
“ well, you can pretend to write in there or join us have a star wars marathon.” Woohyun says.
“ who? Who even plans these things? Who told you I don’t mind?” myungsoo complains and Jiae takes glasses from his shelves and pours some juice in them and answers him.
“ consider this as a public service. We spend time with lonely authors who sulk when their boyfriend is away~” she deadpans and Myungsoo tries to ignore her.
Sunggyu and woohyun are too busy fixing his tv for it to play the movie. They brought bags of chips and he can see a couple of Styrofoam containers as well. He won’t admit it, but he appreciates the company. The noise. This house is fairly empty and fairly secluded. He chose it.
“ we are not together. He barely knows me, what kind of person I am.” He says softly and Jiae hands him a glass.
“ Look, I never knew you before. I don’t know the past myungsoo that you seem so frightened about. But I like who you are now, and sungjong does too, you are being unfair to him you know.”
She leaves him alone and joins the other two in making darth vader noise and laughing about it. The two boys mocking her about her ignorance of everything star wars but she says she is young for it but she can learn.
Myungsoo thinks about it. If this thing with sungjong, whatever this is, he should know the truth. He must lay everything in the open and see if sungjong still accepts him. But it’s still early, if they can both tolerate each other for a few more weeks and his feelings don’t change, then okay. He is tired of waiting for signs and coincidences, like if the next person has a red umbrella or the 5th customer is an old lady then something good will happen. He believes in signs and a bit of fate, but right now, he is betting on himself and what he can do.
The world can only give you so much.
He takes his phone out and types a text. Apparently he can get sexual and grope sungjong but not talk to him over the phone. Somehow, telling the truth seems more baring and intimate.
I would come by late in the afternoon, busy by then?
He sends it and sure enough, sungjong replies quickly.
That’s okay. I have a break around 4-5 pm. See you!
Myungsoo smiles and moves over to his friends, yes, he wil give this a chance.
//
“ I thought you wouldn’t come!” Sungjong says and he feels guilty.
“ I got caught up in writing and the guys came over to watch some films.” He explains and sungjong smiles even more then drags him. He is introduced to different actors and even the crew. Like meeting the family or something. They all smile at him and laugh at sungjong’s obvious excitement over everything. A woman named Juri and a man named Boom were his favorites. They both seem to dote on sungjong and teased him.
“ so, ” Juri says as sungjong introduces them.
“ hello., nice to meet you.” Myungsoo greets and sungjong suddenly looks nervous.
“ nice catch,” Juri answers and he flushes.
“ Juri!” sungjong scolds her but he looks really happy.
Boom on the other hands just relates stories about how sungjong kept talking about spending time with a man named myungsoo. That he owns a bookstore and a coffee shop. About his awesome friends, house and that he is a photographer and an author. Boom knows his book and loved it, so myungsoo feels relieved. Out of everyone in this set, the two seems to be the closest to sungjong. They stay in a trailer and Myungsoo pulls him closer, giving him a quick kiss and pulls away immediately.
“ so, uh- ” sungjong says after the kiss, feeling a bit dazed.
“ Thanks for introducing me to everyone.” Myungsoo says and means it.
“ sorry I can’t hang out with you more. The studio is pressure to finish it on time and we have to follow a strict schedule,” he says, biting his lips.
“ it’s okay, I understand. You can come by when you can or I can swing by here when I am not busy.” Myungsoo clarifies and they both agree to keep in touch.
An unofficial agreement to make it work.
//
It’s been two weeks since they met and it’s been the best two weeks in his entire life. There were bumps and problems along the way but they both couldn’t let go. For Myungsoo, it was hard to let sungjong into his life. Sungjong is such a bright ray of light. And myungsoo’s icy personality won’t fit in. but his friends beg to disagree. He remembers the day they admitted their feelings.
It was a Sunday and sungjong came to his house unannounced only to find that Myungsoo is not there. He charmed the neighbor to tell him where he went and he was directed in a graveyard.
“ Hey-” Myungsoo looks up and he immediately panics. They never talked about this. Never talked about Myungsoo’s past and what he did. But sungjong had that look on his face, that softness, almost as if he understands it. That anything he will sya after will not change anything between the two of them.
“ isn’t this creeping you out? ” he asks, “ that I hangout in a graveyard.”
“ No, I don’t. the one you’re visiting is probably an important person. I want to impress him.” Sungjong answered and Myungsoo wanted to cry. Wanted to pull him close or just touch him- to make sure that this is real. How can this be so easy? When he met sungjong, he thought he is too young. They have a three year age difference and sungjong’s personality added to that. But there are times like this, that his innocence is almost a blessing. He is always so accepting, he almost feels unworthy.
“ I am visiting my father. ” he says in a clipped tone and sungjong sits next to him, on the grass.
“ I looked you up.” Sungjong states, “ I know you were this party-boy who models and does commercials. When I was in high school, I hear about you- do you know that? Now that I recall, I even saw you In some advertisements. ”
“ I was wild, really. A rebel and no once can control me,.” He starts. “ at first it was fun. Everyone was happy cause I was making a name for myself at such a young age. The money wasn’t bad too. But I was involved with the wrong crowd, my manager back then, Tablo. He told me off. He told me to stop but I didn’t.”
He stopped talking, sensing the tears that were about to flow and he couldn’t even control it anymore. Sooner or later, he must tell sungjong everything. It’s sooner than what he does normally, but the man has the right to now.
“ But there was this one time, I got off with the wrong crowd. And we got arrested for drunk driving. We got beat up pretty bad.”
He remember how bad they looked. How he thought he could never walk again or that the bruises on his body and face would never fade away.
“ what happened?” sungjong asks.
“ My father went to the hospital and I was just too stubborn. I screamed at them, and I was such a bad son. His heart does not take stress easily. He started getting attacks-” He stopped short and just glanced at the tombstone. No one told him it’s his fault. No matter how much they all knew that it is his fault. He may not be the one to physically crush his father’s heart but he might as well did. All the stress he put his father through. All those harsh words he said. Not even giving money to them for the hospital bills because he was too damn proud to apologize.
That day at the funeral was his wake-up call. He threw his cellphone and cut off ties with his old friends. He told Tablo he is done with show business and that he will go back to school.
That evening, he pulls out his old diary and writes again.
He meets Woohyun for coffee that evening and reconnects with old friends. When he cam back in school, he met more. People said he has walls all around him and he puts them up for good measure. From the first upto the fourth wall, just to keep himself away from hurting others. His mother and his brother visits him when they can. An unspoken rule to never talk about his dark days. When his book came out and became a bestseller, the relationship with his family somehow became closer. He proved his worth. He rose from everything. But his father is dead. There are things you cannot take back no matter how hard you try.
His eyes never leave the tombstone, afraid to look up at sungjong and find out what the other is thinking about him.
“ You were really close, weren’t you?” he asks gently,
“ We were close, when I was a little kid. But when I started changing, I saw him as an enemy. Someone who wanted to tie me down in our province. I desperately wanted to be somebody you know? ” he laughs a little, thinking about his younger days. “ when a small town kid thinks of seoul, he thinks he can control the world. But it ended up being the other way around.”
“ But you’ve changed. Look, I see you. The first time we met, you were guarded. Even if you offered your help, I could see it in your eyes. You were waiting for me to turn away. But I’m not.” Myungsoo could not help but feel relieved. This is what he wanted to hear, that sungjong will stay. No matter how hard he is to put up with.
“ So, there is no way I’m getting rid of you?” he jokes and sungjong smiles.
“ No. and you must know that okay? Jiae and Woohyun warned me about you. So, I am saying this clearly. I want you. ” his words held no malice. Just a full and honest promise, Myungsoo just nods and kisses him on the cheek which makes the younger man blush.
“so, you’ve been conspiring with them?”
“no! no! ” sungjong waves his hand. “not conspiring. I am also friends with them now you know. We exchange emails once in awhile. ” he flushes some more and Myungsoo takes his hand, pushing him up.
“ you got off from work really early,” he changes the topic.
“ just two hours early. We did a lot of scenes and I am so tired.” Sungjong feigned helplessness and Myungsoo complied. Turning his back away from sungjong, he lowers himself.
“what?” sungjong asks.
“piggyback ride princess,” he says sweetly and wait for sungjong to comply. He does and climbs on his back as he wraps his arms around him. Myungsoo smiles to himself.
“ this is nice, uh- look. Do you want to have dinner tomorrow? I’ll order room service.”
“sure.” Myungsoo says plainly. He is too tired to fight this. Whatever this is they have between them. Maybe he has to accept that good things can actually happen to him even if he did not work hard for it. As a child, he always believed that he deserved nothing but a finite amount of joy. But right now, he feels the wind shift and maybe. Just maybe. He can have it all.
He drops sungjong at his hotel but as soon as they are at the lobby, he turns to him and he is smiling.
“ my bandmate and bestriend, Hoya is here! You should meet!” he looks so happy that Myungsoo could not say no. this seems only fair, isn’t it? He met all his friends and yet, he does not even know his band members in person. Plus, if things will go well and progress he might want to get to know everyone close to sungjong’s heart.
They arrive at his room and as it swung open, it revealed the man that was supposed to be Hoya. He has brown hair and a chiselled jaw that women want. Plus his thick eyebrows are a plus too.
“ You must be myungsoo,” Hoya tells him and they shake hands as he adds, “sungjong never shuts up about you- so I thought, might as well see who you are. ”
Sungjong flushes and kicks Hoya but Myungsoo is amused. Very amused.
“ really, well. Here I am. Kim Myungsoo. ” he says fondly and sungjong pushes them both to go infront of the television to talk. Sungjong says something about preparing drinks and food and left the two alone. Myungsoo feels like this is a test, he needs to pass this.
“ so, I heard you’re a popular author.”
“the books Is much more popular,’ he counters.
“ I read it, you’re good. Atleast he now dates grown men with brains.” Hoya huffs and myungsoo recognizes that tone.
“ did he uh- date- ”
“ did he date idiots before? Ofcourse he did. I mean, he is a wonderful person. Our sungjong, he’s got a big heart and his innocence is endearing. But some people, they take advantage of him. That’s why we all look out for him. ”
“ I understand,” Myungsoo replies, looking around, he sees sungjong looking through bottles and packs of food. Hoya probably brought them for him.
“ He has a knack for picking them you know. Bastards and jerks. He is inexplicably attracted to them.” He looks toward me and feigns ignorance. “ so I wonder, what part of you is a jerk?”
The question is straightforward and I am not even angry. This man does not know me. He does not care about graciousness or courtesy, he is here to see me. To see if I am good enough for sungjong.
“ Uh. I get really caught up when I am writing. I can go for two days without talking to anyone and even eating properly when it happens. Also, I am painfully quiet so he might have a hard time getting secrets and thoughts out of me.” He stops, thinking. “ I kick my friends out of my home when they come unannounced, but they never listen to me. I also take photographs of innocent animals and trees without their permission.” He finishes and Hoya’s lips transform into a wide smile.
“ I think we will get along myungsoo. I really think we will. ” he says and myungsoo relaxes. But his curiosity is still there.
“mind me asking, who did he date?” he asked nonchalantly but hoya caught on.
“ ask him yourself. He will answer them, don’t worry. He is just shy, cause the ones he dated were jerks. I mean, you wouldn’t want to boast about those right?” he stops for a moment and tells sungjong about some meat that should be kept on the fridge. “ then he has you, this amazing author who has nice friends and - you are all literate and shit.”
Myungsoo gathers these in his head and it comes to him, Sungjong feels like he is not worthy of him. But it’s the other way around, he thinks for himself. Sungjong has the youth and his career. He has the grace and the friendly nature that made his friends clamor over him.
“ I am not that great.” He replies.
“ well, he thinks you are. ” Hoya says and Sungjong finally comes in, with some drinks and chips.
They spend less than an hour watching a game show, trying to answer the questions. He is happy to see sungjong like this, with someone he knows. A friend. They talk about upcoming recordings and songwriting sessions. Even how they will promote. Hoya says his goodbye, telling them that he needs to visit someone.They say goodbye and as soon as the door shuts and they go back to the couch- Myungsoo can’t help it. He wants to ask. Really, really wants to ask.
“so-” he begins.
“what did he tell you?” sungjong says.
“ not much, just -he likes me and that you are so lucky to have me,” Myungsoo jokes and Sungjong turns to him, his eyes all serious.
“ I guess I am.” He replies and Myungsoo backtracks.
“ Look, it was fine. I expected it, plus Hoya, I think he has that strong attitude. He has the leader aura in him, so- ”
“ yes, he is that way. He is our CEO’s favourite. Because he works crazy hard and he produces results. At the same time, he can even take care of us,.” Sungjong says in wonder and bites his lip.
“he also told me you dated a lot. ” Myungsoo asked the question like this. Open-ended. He can either brush it off and blame his youth or tell him the sordid truth. It felt like an hour, but only a few seconds and sungjong answered.
“what do you want to know? Past dating history?” he asked, looking all embarrassed.
“ look, I just want to know okay. We all make our mistakes, I did. I told you right, worse than whoever you dated.” Myungsoo offers.
“ I know. But it’s- I am not perfect, I screwed up too. And I want you to see me as someone perfect, even if it’s not true.” Sungjong tells him, eyes wide and hands wringing. Frantic. “I mean, your friends and people see me as this pop star and some people might think that is enough for you. But it’s not. I am nothing but a child to you.” Myungsoo is about to cut in, in protest but sungjong stops him.
“ You are incredibly smart. You wrote that book, you are from Korea and you produced an international bestseller. You read a lot of books, which means you know a lot. Plus, you obviously know a lot about business as well. Jiae tells me that you balance everything and I just-”
Myungsoo grabs his hand, squeezing it tight and he stops.
“ Look, we both have great things and absolutely bad things about us. But I am willing to accept and compromise everything. If that means I can have you.” He says finally. It surprises him how quickly those words came out and how much he means it. Really, everything does not matter if in the end, they can get to be together. If It’s easy, it won’t mean anything. Sungjong stares at him in wonder, like he is the most fascinating thing he ever saw.
“ I’m just- I can’t believe I got it right this time.” He whispers.
“what me? Look, like you- I am not way perfect. I hang out graveyards when I have nothing to do.” He says in a self-depreciating tone but sungjong does not stop.
“ No, No. it’s they always tell me that I have the talent and everything. But I have no luck in love. You know, how they say we can’t have everything? That’s it. I always believed I will be unlucky, but I found you.” He blushed furiously and Myungsoo wanted to tell him it’s fine and that it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
“ yah! Your expectations of me ar too high!” he complains and sungjong punches him.
“ you like it!”
“so, who is that- who was hoya talking about? The one you dated, he seemed really pissed. ”
He hesitates for a moment.
“ his name is Taemin. He is a member of another boyband, but that was before the band and I got famous.” His face is turned down, refusing to meet myungsoo’s face. “ his band just started and- you know, we had the same friends and I also wanted to be like him one day. We became friends and more. But he started being too controlling. We broke up and the band, with hoya and the guys. It took off. We became successful. And, once, I met Taemin at a concert, and he told me that he will tell the media about us. ”
Myungsoo tensed at that,
“ he is blackmailing you? ”
“ No. no. I don’t. I don’t know if he is just playing with me. And if he says that, his reputation will go down as well. ”
“ you should sue him.” Myungsoo says.
“ I don’t want to do that. Plus, it was like, a year or less ago. We haven’t talked. No threats.” Sungjong smiles at him, then ducks in for a quick kiss on the lips. Just a quick touch of their mouths and myungsoo frowns.
“are you trying to distract me?”
“whatever for?”
“ your horrid ex-boyfriend?” he retorts.
“no, I promise. It’s fine. Really,”
“ so why bribe me with kisses?”
“I am not bribing you. I just want to kiss you.,” he laughs and literally attacks me myungsoo. Pushing him, pinning him on the couch. Myungsoo thinks he should be the one taking the lead, but lets the other do it anyway. He likes this. Losing himself.
“ this is sordid.” Myungsoo exclaims as they kiss.
“why?”
“ I mean, in a couch, at the hotel room. Really?” they both chuckle and sungjong looks at him.
“why? Do you want to move to your house? ”
“ You can move in and live with me. ” SHIT. Myungsoo tells himself and they both freeze at his words. How can he ruin the mood with his words? Really? This will get good and without interruption and he has to open his mouth.
“I mean-” he starts and stop.
“ you mean it?” sungjong asks.
“ Yes, you can move in. you still have a month and two weeks of shoot. I can drive you to work everyday.” He says and sungjong lights up.
“Okay, I’ll tell my manager and the producers.” He says simply and kisses him once more.slowly this time- biting his lower lip and myungsoo moans. Shamelessly.
Sungjong kept tugging until Myungsoo rose to his feet.
And so Sungjong kissed Myungsoo for th nth time. he couldn't even keep count. not because it was not important, but because every kiss felt knew. blwe his mind away and every other kiss turned non-existent. But this wasn't sweet or tender. It was hard and hungry and angry, and their hands didn't stroke or caress skin, they pulled hair and yanked at robe buttons and belts and zippers. "You're sure about this?" Myungsoo asked as he removed Sungjong's top and Sunghong pushed him backwards towards the bed.
"Shut up, ." he said and thank god the bed was close.
After that, they didn't talk. Their hands were insistent down the front of underpants, gripping because they couldn't get rid of their clothing fast enough. Myungsoo's hand on Sungjong wasn't especially gentle and Sungjong didn't want it to be. He needed this, a passion strong enough to beat the grief and isolation out of him, make him feel something, make his heart beat faster, make him live. And for a few minutes, it was all about the fast slide of palms over engorged flesh, up and down, up and down, and the bright streaks of ecstasy like falling stars behind Sungjong's closed eyelids. His mouth was open and pressed to Myungsoo's but they didn't kiss, mostly just breathed each other as Myungsoo's body weighed his down into the mattress.
People mark each other as their own with ink and pen. in paper and contracts. That was their life before. but now, it's different. this is them , marking each other in the very sense of the word. It doesn't matter if they had lovers before. if their bodies were used by other and their lips crushed by another. what matters is now. who they are and what they will become now that they are together.
This was better than kissing or make-out sessions, even though Myungsoo's rhythm wasn't quite as fast as Sungjong might have liked and he sometimes paused at the wrong moment. But it was better because the exact nature of Myungsoo's touch came unanticipated, more arousing for the startle, and Myungsoo's little noises of intense lust sent flutters all through Sungjong's chest and belly and groin. He relished the feel of Myungsoo's erection in his grip, spongy and hot and soft on the surface like doeskin. It stiffened further as the insistent pound of Sungjong's hand pushed him closer to the edge even as Sungjong felt himself pushed that way too. "Faster," he breathed, grunting as Myungsoo obeyed, his hand almost frantic with speed. Then Sungjong felt it start, the warm rush from his balls through the length of his prick and the sharp spike of orgasm like an arrow to the spine. Myungsoo squeezed so hard it almost hurt as Sungjong spurted against his fingers, groaning wild in his throat and Myungsoo followed him over the brink, his hips pushing against Sungjong's abdomen, his semen coating Sungjong's skin.
They both kept stroking a little to finish, then their hands stilled. Myungsoo's forehead dropped against Sungjong's half-bare shoulder. Sungjong felt boneless, and hot and sweaty despite the r cold. Their clothes were all twisted around in uncomfortable ways and their hands were sticky. "You're on top," Sujngong murmured against Myungsoo's hair. "You get to clean up first."
Myungsoo grunted and rolled off Sungjong to sit up. His trousers were around his ankles and his robe pushed up to his waist. He divested himself of both and went to the toilet in his underpants, socks and a t-shirt. Sungjong watched through half-closed lids, getting out of his own clothing and leaving them in a pile on the floor beside Myungsoo's. When Myungsoo was done, they traded places, and when Sungjong emerged, naked now, Myungsoo had the sheets down and was waiting, lamps out and only the low light from light posts outside. Sungjong hurried over the wooden floor and dived in beside Myungsoo. They still didn't talk about anything that mattered, just low murmurs, their kisses gentle now and a bit sleepy, fingers tender on skin and hair. Sungjong no longer felt alone, but he supposed he hadn't been before. Myungsoo had been there all along.
//
It was a Wednesday Morning when Sungyeol came barging into his bookstore and Jiae was delighted to see him. They talked for a while and Myungsoo dreaded the worse as sungyeol came close, his laptop on hand. He has a plan.
“ please, I had a good day. And I feel this week will be better. But please,” myungsoo starts and Sungyeol whacks him on the head.
“ you know what, sometimes, you are more ungrateful than my students.”
“ you mean your preschool kids? Those kids, whose parents pay you disgusting amounts of money?”
“oh shut up. Stop mocking my profession. I teach them the way of the world,” he says with a flourish and myungsoo snorts.
“whatever, your brain had been brainwashed by those kids, you act like them too.”
“ don’t change the subject. Look,” he opens his laptop and myungsoo peers.
“ what am I supposed to be seeing? ” he asks.
“ YOUR ARCH ENEMY YOU IDIOT!” He scolds him, pointing to the screen and he reads. It’s a Wikipedia page of a man named, LEE TAEMIN. Is this?
Myungsoo buries his hands on his face. Really? Why did he think it was a good idea to tell sungyeol about taemin. Sungyeol came into his house, sulking that he is not sharing his love life. Guilt trip. Then myungsoo tells the story and the taemin issue just slips. Even the one that he supposedly blackmailed (sort of) sungjong. And sungyeol immediately felt concerned, like it’s his life mission to know more about taemin. “the enemy” he says.
“don’t tell me- ”
“ this is just a wiki page Myung, just read about him. There are lots of sites about him and facts and shut. But this is like a summary, you know. To know the competition. ”
“ I am not competing, they are not together and-”
“ I said read it. Okay, I know sungjong is completely into you. But who knows, this kid. I mean, he looks like someone who will seduce married woman and men. ” his voice is full of conspiracy and malice. Myungsoo should tell him to leave, but decides against it. If this kid decided to try and waltz back into sungjong’s life. He should be prepared.
He reads it and finds out that he is from a band as well. He dances really well and sings well too. He does commercials and from a popular entertainment company. He also did a bit of acting. It is also included that he is close to sungjong even before he shot to fame. There is also a picture of them.
“I tried to erase that part of the article man, but someone kept on putting it up there.” Sungjong said, irritated.
“ Look, thank you man, but- ”
“I mean, it’s not because I’m your friend. But you are better looking, plus you have this older man charisma. ”
“ I am not an old man, I am just three years older than him, ”
“ but you are an old soul. I mean, even for us, you are wiser than your years.” He says and myungsoo agrees with that.
“so?” he asks.
“so what? What do you want me to do? March over and demand for a dance off?” myungsoo says and sungyeol’s eyes go wide.
“that’s genius!” he exclaims.
“shut up! Look, I am not going to do anything. I don’t have too. I just had to know, who he is, it’s sungjong’s past and. ”
“ I am digging more about him, don’t worry.”
Myungsoo huffs and sungyeol takes it upon himself to sit on with him and search. He uses the keywords Lee Taemin and searches frantically. He leaves him alone and spends time with his books. Jiae eyes him.
“don’t worry! He won’t come back to Taemin.” She says and myungsoo rolls his eyes at her.
“ why are you all so invested in this?”
“sungyeol told me. And I know, I know you feel like we shouldn’t do this. But Sungjong is our friend too. We want to protect him too. ”
“ okay, but really. I just, we’re okay. Jiae, sungjong and I. we are fine. ”
Jiae smiles at him. “ I always knew you’d have the best love story. ”
“whatever! You’ve been reading too much romance novels! ”
He tries to help some more customers but sungyeol is frantic and calls him over.
“what?” he asks and sungyeol is ponting at the frontpage of a search site. He looks at it. It’s about sungjong as the title says and it has a blurry picture with it, it’s the two of them. They are not kissing, but about to or just after they kissed. His insides is churning as he reads the title.
“rockstar’s night out”
And the article said all about this mysterious guys he is hooking up with and how everyone will be devastated that he is off the market. His insides freeze and sungyeol is calling him, while jiae is shaking him.
“what- how- ” he says but nothing came out. He thinks about sungjong, what his managers will say. Even the producers of the film. What his fans and the general public will say.
“ I have to go.”
He says quickly and leaves, but before he does, he picks up his phone. Sungjong is not answering. He tenses with that, this means the news came to him already. Maybe he is now in a meeting with executives from the company he works for. Shit. Shit. Shit. It’s all over his head. Instead, he leaves a voice mail. And he says it.
“ Hey, I love you. I will fix this. ”
===
A/N:
I forgot, i did not post it on LJ. i was just updating it on AFF. PSSSH. dunno why i forgot.
Paring: Myungsoo (L) x Sungjong [Infinite]
Genre: Romance, Drama, Humor
Rating: G to NC17
Summary: This is a Notting Hill AU written for the pairing. Does not generally follow the entire premise of the story but is heavily inspired by it. Kim Myungsoo, was once a bright and wild kid but because of an incident, He quits the spotlight and becomes an owner of a bookstore and uses his time to write. In comes Kim Sungjong, the “it” guy from the music industry. They meet one day and nothing is ever the same. This story is about dreams and what does fame means. And if Love will really prevail despite of everything.
Disclaimer: This work of fiction is inspired by the film Notting Hill. Scenarios and dialogue and everything else is mine. The characters/real life people I am basing them off are not mine. I do not mean any disrespect to them. I do not profit from this.
The first thing he registers in his mind is that he has a horrid crick in his neck. Second he is not in his room. Third, there is a warm body pressed against him. It does not compute in his head so he opens his eyes and discovers that everything is true. Sungjong is asleep, his arms over his body, pulling him close. Clinging to him. He suddenly feels hot all over but he can’t just pull away without waking him. Thankfully, sungjong chooses this time to stir and his eyes flutter open.
He half falls in love with him at that very moment.
He had a few relationships under his belt and they were all convenient and happy. A lot of good moments but he doesn’t remember feeling something similar to this. He always thought that love was something you have to work on, that it takes time. He had no idea that sometimes, It can spring out of nowhere. That love can come from something so ordinary. People fall and get infatuated with actors, models and musicians partly because of the illusion they create. It’s human nature to long for something you cannot have. But this, just looking at him opening his eyes from deep slumber- his heart flutters and settles down in a stretch of a minute.
“ Good morning, ” Sungjong tells him and he manages an awkward half-smile.
“ It’s a bit late, 7.” He says and is relieved that it’s a Saturday so they won’t open till 9 am.
“I’m sorry, I fell asleep, I really just wanted to take a short nap. ” he tells him,
“ no, it’s okay. Really. Uh, we should probably have breakfast or something.”
“ agreed.” He replies and they both stand up, loosening their limbs and checking their phones. Myungsoo receives a lot of email from his friends and he couldn’t help but laugh about all of them. They knew he will turn his phone off or delete all his messages but there is something about emails that he cannot resist to read them.
I CAN’T BELIEVE IT. I just attended a great party and met sungjong, I think we are friends now. We are, right? I am so happy for you.
-Jiae
Thanks for coming man!
You brought the biggest surprise with your boy toy!
I knew you had it in you. You are incredibly good looking and shit,
That kid had no chance!
-woohyun
You will tell me everything.
Stop obsessing and just smile more.
Also, don’t start talking about your love for photography.
I know you love it, take pictures of him. But don’t be too creepy!
Don’t tell about the exposures and all that stuff. I will come down to your house, just as soon as I’m done teaching these kids. Okay!
-sungyeol
MAN! We did not talk that much last night. Tablo wanted to talk to you but he gave you space cause you had sungjong with you.
He did not want to recruit you into acting, don’t worry. He just wants to see you.
He cares about you, He’s like your older brother.
-dongwoo
They all pestered me to send you an email so this is it.
Just be happy myungsoo, I am here for you. You two look good together. Unlike those idiots, I know that you are not in a relationship.
But I know this is faster than expected.
But I think, it’s a good thing.
- sunggyu
His face flushes, are his friends that invested in his love life? Sungjong looks at him and he asks him where he wants to get breakfast.
“ I prefer to stay in” he answers and it dawns on him, ofcourse, people might stare at them.
“ want to eat at my house?” He asks and runs his head if his house is clean and his pantry is stocked. They can’t go inside a grocery store. Last night, woohyun added guards and made sure no one took a picture with sungjong rather than his friends.
“ that’s a plan.”
They drive to his house and he can’t believe they will be spending time in his house again. He hates it when people come over (except his family) but for sungjong, it comes naturally.
He busies himself in the kitchen and sungjong helps him out. They decide on omelette and bacon plus orange juice. Ofcourse, Sungjong also has to be a good cook and kitchen efficient.
“ what? ” sungjong asks.
“ nothing, it’s just that I didn’t expect you to be this domestic.” He states plainly and Sungjong punches his arm.
“ I wasn’t born a superstar or anything. I had to do the usual chores at home.”
“ really, so, how about your movie shoot? Aren’t you supposed to be on set?”
“ No. I have Friday and Saturday off, I work on Sunday to Thursday.” He says back and fills the plate with bacon.
“ Your location is not that far from work,” he says and realizes what he just implied.
“ so, does that mean you will come visit me on set?”
“ maybe,” he replies and steals one strip, tasting it.
“ you won’t get to eat anymore if you don’t visit me.”
How can he say no to that? He nods and Sungjong jumps up in glee. They eat the food in silence, both of them not realizing how hungry they really are. Myungsoo argues with himself if he should ask him to stay and spend the day together. He is not ready to let him go yet. But what if he has some plans?
“ any plans today?” he asks casually and Sungjong shakes his head no.
“ I will be going to a nearby forest, for a shoot.” He says and explains more. “ I am a photographer, not professionally though. Just for myself and for a portfolio that no one will ever see.” He rambles.
“ well, thank god, the camera loves me.” Sungjong responds and He feels relaxed. He said yes. He will get to spend a day with him again.
“ So, should I drop you off your hotel first?”
“ Yes, I also need some emails and probably call a few people then we can go and do your photoshoot.” He adds and they fall back to eating.
Everything seemed so natural. For the past years, he spent his time in here, eating breakfast all alone. But now, he is sharing space with someone. Technically, they are not sharing any space but still. He stares at sungjong and wants to hold him close, probably push him to his bed and keep him there. He coughs violently as he realized what he just thought and sungjong looks at him, concerned.
“ you okay? ”
“ yeah, you done? We should get going.”
They get back to the car and he knows the hotel where sungjong is staying in. As they arrive, everyone is professional enough to not ask for a picture and a photograph. That is because they entered at the back because there are fans lined outside, waiting to see sungjong.
“ this is crazy,” he tells him.
“ Yes, I admire the dedication really. But I say hi and they see me when I do the shooting, but it’s my day off, so I hide from them.” Sungjong confesses.
The room, a penthouse. No surprise there. He remembers staying places like this all the time during his time as an actor. As a kid, It was the most amazing thing for him. Sungjong busies himself first with a computer and sends emails. He takes his script with him , saying that he will study it. Finally, he goes to shower while Myungsoo looks out the window and looks around. He spots a CD, INFINITE. He reminds himself to buy one. Jiae told him that sungjong writes the lyrics so he feels like he needs to listen to it.
Sungjong comes out and it does not take him long to be ready. He looks as radiant as ever and Myungsoo feels embarrassed cause he took longer to get ready.
“ this is unbelievable,” sungjong suddenly says, “ you are so handsome.” He says in wonder and Myungsoo flushes.
“ shut up, I will still drive you around town,”
“ No. really. I have seen a lot of people, but you are different. ” he seems so honest about all this that myungsoo just looks away.
“ it’s not important,” he says.
Really. All those years of being vain about himself and being too proud about his looks are over. They seem so far, those days that everyone gushed about him and he will hold his head high, thinking that he is better than everyone. It all seems so childish now. More than ever, he hates being judged with his looks. No one will take him seriously. Expecting him to be dumb and be nothing more than a pretty face.
“ so, should we go now?” Sungjong asks and he says yes, he cannot wait to show sungjong the forest. It’s almost an hour drive, but it would be worth it.
//
“ this is amazing! ”
Sungjong says and Myungsoo sighs in relief. Funny enough, they spend the day exploring the wilderness and taking pictures. It’s not a surprise, Myungsoo tells himself, that Sungjong is the perfect subject. No wonder he is a star and jiae shrieks over him. They take a break after two hours and eat quietly.
“ so, you go to work tomorrow?” Myungsoo asks and passes him a can of soda.
“ Yes. ” Sungjong says immediately and turns to him. “ Thank you for this, really. You know what? Why don’t you come on set? It’s- ” he stops short and continues. “ it should be fun for you, you can take pictures and stuff.”
Myungsoo studies him, is he seriously embarrassed? He does not try and explain the behaviour.
“ Okay, I’ll go-” he says and sungjong jumps in joy. Literally.
“ That would be great! It’s just that, the band is not with me- so, and everyone is just.” He makes a face and myungsoo gets it.
“ obnoxious? Full of themselves? Rude?” he states and sungjong laughs, “ you can tell me to stop when I figure the right word”
“ I know I should be happy and all, you know, with this opportunity. But I have no idea when it comes to making movies. It’s completely different. And I get homesick all over again.” His voice is solemn and a bit confused at the same time. Myungsoo wants to tell him that it’s alright, that it would get better. But he never uses that phrase anymore. He knows, in a way what it’s like to be in the business. Though he never got into acting.
“ I’m boring you, sorry.” Sungjong says and smiles at him, trying to change the mood.
“ No, it’s okay. You can tell me what’s bothering you. We’re friends.” He offers and wants to whack himself repeatedly after. When did he get so bad at flirting? He admits he is not good at relationships, but in his past, he can flirt like a pro. Is woohyun right? He’s out of practice? (not that he has someone to practice this on, well he does now).
“ Thank you. Really, so-”
“ we have to get back, I need to look at the shop for a bit and do a bit of writing.” He says truthfully. Although he wants to spend the day with sungjong, he is working on a tight deadline for his next book.
“ I can tag along.” Sungjong replies and they both go back in the car.
As soon as they enter the bookstore, thank god the employee is the oldest two Myungsoo has. They just greet him and didn’t even bat an eyelash at sungjong, he thinks they were warned by Jiae or Woohyun. He looks at the stocks and leaves Sungjong at his office. The latter, looking very much interested with what an ordinary office looks like. He does not talk to anyone and checks his books.
His two favourite authors came out with new books and that made his day even happier. He helps in fixing the front window and tries not to explain to Mrs. Kim why he is with sungjong. But her eyes are calculating and almost judging that he eventually caves in.
“ he is a friend.” He explains as they stack the books and Mrs. Kim looks at him.
“ Jiae told me about your new boyfriend”
“ he’s not!” myungsoo half screams and he feels sorry for screaming at Mrs. Kim. “ I mean, we. Look, we are not together or what.”
“ I know, but do you want to?”
Myungsoo swears everyone in his life is so invested in him, it’s scary. Like, all of them will be disappointed all over again. Mrs. Kim is waiting for an answer and he huffs in defeat. A day in here won’t be productive at all, especially if sungjong is right there in his office.
“ I do, but right now-”
Mrs. Kim squeals. Squeals like a fourteen year old and proceeds to stack the books. There is something really wrong in here, he thinks to himself and gets to his office. Only to find sungjong, seated on his desk and he has to calm down. Really. It’s too early to be this hyped up.
“ Hi, that was quick-” sungjong says and he acts like nothing is wrong.
“ oh, it’s a weekend, I just pop in and leave.” He says and he takes his keys, a sign that they should get going. Sungjong follows and he puts his cap on.
They decide to go out and do a bit of sight seeing. Which is achievable as Sungjong is practically hidden in his cap and hoodie. Both walking and talking at the same time, like old friends and would-be lovers. Myungsoo knows something shifted from when they first met, when he spilled his coffee over him to now. Somewhere, in between that time that he introduce him to his friends and they slept in the bookshop everything changed. He now understands when people tell him about “instant connection” well, this feels like that.
It’s 7PM when they decide to call it a day and Sungjong tells him that he wants to go back at myungsoo’s house because he forgot something. What that was, he didn’t tell. The music in the car is blaring and Myungsoo can’t believe how skittish he is right now. They will be alone. Alone in his house and they are not kids to not know what happens next. Atleast, he has to kiss sungjong. The thought makes his stomach flutter.
“ you okay?” sungjong grins at him and he knows. Sungjong knows that he has that effect on him.
“ yeah.” He says roughly and Sungjong continues to smile and sing along to the music.
As we enter the house, it's like a whole new portal was opened. They did alot of side stepping and now it's time for them to do something about it. Sungjong makes a scene with rushing to the bathroom saying that, there is where he left his bracelet or something. He comes out and steps closer to Myungsoo. This is it, Myungsoo keeps repeating in hsi head and sungjong's lashes just flutter so beautifully.
He looked over at him and, this time, Myungsoo leans in and his breath catches his eyes showed a flash of nerves as Myungsoo neared him. Before he touched their lips together he tells him " You know I want you, right?"
"Yes," Sungjong replies and closes the gap between them.
His lips are insistent parting them quickly for Myungsoo. But Myungsoo slowed him down by moving his tongue gently against his, flicking it against his bottom lip and then biting it gently.
"Fuck, I want you." He pulled away from me and ran his hand along myungsoo's chest.
" eager are we," myungsoo asks and sungjong stick his tongue out in defiance.
" we could use yoour sofa, " he suggests and Myungsoo smiles, thinking that they are ready for this. whatever this is. we both pull at each other's top but myungsoo is the only one who gets his off.
Obediently, Sungjong slipped his hand around Myungsoo's side and left it on his back. Myungsoo kissed him, pressing him even further into the sofa, and letting his body slide to his right so that he was lying on his side. his right arm lay on the couch, angled around sungjong's head, and his left hand traipsed down his shirt until he reached the hem. He pulls it upward, removing it and running his hand on the younger's abdomen.
As their tongues pushed and pulled, Myungsoo smiled against his lips. He could feel him against his hip, hard and pressing into him. They continued to kiss and Myungsoo took the first step, with his hands going south and placed it over Sungjong's length. He moved his hand up and down, palming him through the thick material, he growled against his lips, and Myungsoo pulled his mouth away but continued his handiwork.
"You like that?" He whispers gently, leaning on to sungjong and whispers "I can't wait to have my hands actually on you,"
"Yes," he hissed in response to the query. His hips bucking against Myungsoo, and he smiles before kissing the collarbone and sucking lightly on the skin there. " please let me touch you," sungjong manages to say, Myungsoo acquiesced and lifted his hand.
Although it surprised Myungsoo that he was initiating things, He wanted Sungong to touch him as badly as it appeared that he wanted to. Sungjong is a mystery to him. Although his supposed fans (like jiae) would argue. He can have whoever he wants, even a fellow celebrity. But he picks him, out of everyone. a lonely author who owns a bookstore. "Whatever you want," he replies.
"I love this," Sungjong says breathily,
His tongue was on Myungsoo's skin then, and he had to work to breathe normally. Apparently, Anxious Sungjong was nowhere in the vicinity, because he followed the border of the some invinsible line on his arm, his hands tracing random designs on his chest. Myungsoo almost feels guilty that he liked the feel of his fingertips on his skin…
And then he shoved his hand down the front of Myungsoo's jeans.
Yeah. Anxious Sungjong had left the goddamned building.
"fuck," he gasped as the had wrapped around him. thank god he had a loose belt on.
"Commando, huh? I like it." Sungjong whispered against his ear as he stroked his hand slowly up and down, increasing thehardness, and then he moved his lips along Myungsoo's collarbone and dragged his tongue down the chest and around his nipples. He took a moment to suck on there, and a fucking happy sigh come from his lips.
Myungsoo knew right there that he is a goner.
As he assaulted Myungsoo's chest with kisses and licks and soft bites, he continued moving his hand up and down the shaft. Myungsoo could feel that he was going to need more room, so when he pulled awayhe snaked my hands between us and unbuttoned my jeans. folding them down over the definition of his pelvic muscles. Instantly, the cold air against his skin felt good, and Sungjong turned his face away,
They kissed slowly, and Myungsoo slid his hand into the hair on the back of Sungjong's head, gently pulling him back to the couch. he stretches his neck and response and Myungsoo pressed his lips over Sungjon's throat , sucking hard enough to elicit a response from him in the form of gasps and short breaths but not hard enough to leave a mark. He kissed him that way until they were both breathing hard, and when they both pulled away, Myungsoo says, "You're mine."
The statement was possessive; He knew that. But somehow, He knew it was true.
"Yes," Sungjong managed to reply back, and then we both heard a key in the door. "Shit," he mumbled.
I sat up and grabbed my shirt as Woohyun's voice rang out. "YOO-HOO! Myunggie, you there?"
Myungsoo growls in frustration and they both ake quick work of arranging themselves. Sungjong is quick enough because he is standing up when woohyun arrives.
" what do you want?" he whirls to see woohyun, whose face looks surprised and sungjong smiles. smiles sweetly at him, with all his innocence back in check. like minutes ago, they didn;t touch intimately.
" I have to go!" he says quickly and adds, " I had someone pick me up, from the hotel."
Woohyun adds " Yeah, man, I saw a car from -" He does not finis his sentence as Sungjong passes him by and he notices a large hickey on his neck. Then his eyes travel towards Myungsoo.
" OMG MAN! DON'T TELL ME I JUST COCKBLOCKED YOU!"
Myungsoo hissed, wanting more than ever to throw a vase at Woohyun. He fixes himself and races towards the door, but woohyun stops him.
" I am absolutely sorry man, I just came by to say thanks and-"
" woohyun." he says sternly and he stops. "shut up."
He opens the door and sees sunjong getting inside a hotel service car, he calls him out and holds his hand. Fuck. holding hands now, really? how sweet.
" Look, i'm sorry-"
Sungjong looks down, all shy and unsure. " Yeah. It was too soon, I'm sorry if i came on too quick."
" NO!" Myungsoo protested. " No, I mean. It was fine. I just, i could drive you back. I can-"
" No, it's okay. I troubled you enough. plus, you will go on set with me the next day, right? right?"
"sure." he says and he wants to lean over and kiss him but sungjong looks over at the driver. the driver clearly knows who sungjong is and it hits him. This. what they have. it's a secret. a dirty secret and he knows he deserves better. but he feels strangely fine. he will get what he can, as long as he can have sungjong a little bit longer.
" Thank you myungsoo. really. I- I left my number on your bathroom. so-" his face flushes and Myungsoo hugs him.
"" be safe. " he tells him earnestly and he gets inside the car.
Myungsoo goes back inside the house and his eyes narrow. Woohyun is holding up a piece of paper over to him with a sly grin on his face and says,
" well, what do we have here?"
" I hate you." Myungsoo retorts but there is smile on his face.
//
The next day is a Sunday, which means he has to write and look at the state of his house. If he needs anything. Waking up fairly early, 8:00 am jogs until he reaches the river. He eats breakfast and begins to write, everything goes fine till the clock strikes 1:00 pm and the number stored in his phone is still unused. Sungjong’s. He argues that Sungjong is busy and he doesn’t want him to bother him during the shoot. The man already said his worries about his co-stars and him showing up there will probably raise a lot of eyebrows.
He tries to call but his hands would not cooperate. He hears a knock on the door and he shouts to come in. Woohyun, Sunggyu and Jiae emerge in his side and he regrets his decision to let them in.
“ why are you here?” woohyun asks, incredulous.
“ this is my house,” he states.
“ you didn’t call him, you idiot.” Jiae scolded him.
“ why are you here? You should be at him studying or hanging out with your obscenely tall friends.” Myungsoo retorts and Jiae frowns.
“ they are not fun, they do the same thing over and over again. I like hanging out with your friends more,”
Woohyun grins, “ see Myunggie, we are good company. Why you deny us is a question to me.”
“ If this is about what Woohyun did last night,” Sunggyu says calmly and Myungsoo flushes immediately. Ofcourse, he told them all about the incident. He glares at woohyun who just answers by winking at him.
“ No. I have to meet my deadline for the book, I have a schedule. Okay?” he answers and turns to his computer. He finished his deadline for the day.
“ well, you can pretend to write in there or join us have a star wars marathon.” Woohyun says.
“ who? Who even plans these things? Who told you I don’t mind?” myungsoo complains and Jiae takes glasses from his shelves and pours some juice in them and answers him.
“ consider this as a public service. We spend time with lonely authors who sulk when their boyfriend is away~” she deadpans and Myungsoo tries to ignore her.
Sunggyu and woohyun are too busy fixing his tv for it to play the movie. They brought bags of chips and he can see a couple of Styrofoam containers as well. He won’t admit it, but he appreciates the company. The noise. This house is fairly empty and fairly secluded. He chose it.
“ we are not together. He barely knows me, what kind of person I am.” He says softly and Jiae hands him a glass.
“ Look, I never knew you before. I don’t know the past myungsoo that you seem so frightened about. But I like who you are now, and sungjong does too, you are being unfair to him you know.”
She leaves him alone and joins the other two in making darth vader noise and laughing about it. The two boys mocking her about her ignorance of everything star wars but she says she is young for it but she can learn.
Myungsoo thinks about it. If this thing with sungjong, whatever this is, he should know the truth. He must lay everything in the open and see if sungjong still accepts him. But it’s still early, if they can both tolerate each other for a few more weeks and his feelings don’t change, then okay. He is tired of waiting for signs and coincidences, like if the next person has a red umbrella or the 5th customer is an old lady then something good will happen. He believes in signs and a bit of fate, but right now, he is betting on himself and what he can do.
The world can only give you so much.
He takes his phone out and types a text. Apparently he can get sexual and grope sungjong but not talk to him over the phone. Somehow, telling the truth seems more baring and intimate.
I would come by late in the afternoon, busy by then?
He sends it and sure enough, sungjong replies quickly.
That’s okay. I have a break around 4-5 pm. See you!
Myungsoo smiles and moves over to his friends, yes, he wil give this a chance.
//
“ I thought you wouldn’t come!” Sungjong says and he feels guilty.
“ I got caught up in writing and the guys came over to watch some films.” He explains and sungjong smiles even more then drags him. He is introduced to different actors and even the crew. Like meeting the family or something. They all smile at him and laugh at sungjong’s obvious excitement over everything. A woman named Juri and a man named Boom were his favorites. They both seem to dote on sungjong and teased him.
“ so, ” Juri says as sungjong introduces them.
“ hello., nice to meet you.” Myungsoo greets and sungjong suddenly looks nervous.
“ nice catch,” Juri answers and he flushes.
“ Juri!” sungjong scolds her but he looks really happy.
Boom on the other hands just relates stories about how sungjong kept talking about spending time with a man named myungsoo. That he owns a bookstore and a coffee shop. About his awesome friends, house and that he is a photographer and an author. Boom knows his book and loved it, so myungsoo feels relieved. Out of everyone in this set, the two seems to be the closest to sungjong. They stay in a trailer and Myungsoo pulls him closer, giving him a quick kiss and pulls away immediately.
“ so, uh- ” sungjong says after the kiss, feeling a bit dazed.
“ Thanks for introducing me to everyone.” Myungsoo says and means it.
“ sorry I can’t hang out with you more. The studio is pressure to finish it on time and we have to follow a strict schedule,” he says, biting his lips.
“ it’s okay, I understand. You can come by when you can or I can swing by here when I am not busy.” Myungsoo clarifies and they both agree to keep in touch.
An unofficial agreement to make it work.
//
It’s been two weeks since they met and it’s been the best two weeks in his entire life. There were bumps and problems along the way but they both couldn’t let go. For Myungsoo, it was hard to let sungjong into his life. Sungjong is such a bright ray of light. And myungsoo’s icy personality won’t fit in. but his friends beg to disagree. He remembers the day they admitted their feelings.
It was a Sunday and sungjong came to his house unannounced only to find that Myungsoo is not there. He charmed the neighbor to tell him where he went and he was directed in a graveyard.
“ Hey-” Myungsoo looks up and he immediately panics. They never talked about this. Never talked about Myungsoo’s past and what he did. But sungjong had that look on his face, that softness, almost as if he understands it. That anything he will sya after will not change anything between the two of them.
“ isn’t this creeping you out? ” he asks, “ that I hangout in a graveyard.”
“ No, I don’t. the one you’re visiting is probably an important person. I want to impress him.” Sungjong answered and Myungsoo wanted to cry. Wanted to pull him close or just touch him- to make sure that this is real. How can this be so easy? When he met sungjong, he thought he is too young. They have a three year age difference and sungjong’s personality added to that. But there are times like this, that his innocence is almost a blessing. He is always so accepting, he almost feels unworthy.
“ I am visiting my father. ” he says in a clipped tone and sungjong sits next to him, on the grass.
“ I looked you up.” Sungjong states, “ I know you were this party-boy who models and does commercials. When I was in high school, I hear about you- do you know that? Now that I recall, I even saw you In some advertisements. ”
“ I was wild, really. A rebel and no once can control me,.” He starts. “ at first it was fun. Everyone was happy cause I was making a name for myself at such a young age. The money wasn’t bad too. But I was involved with the wrong crowd, my manager back then, Tablo. He told me off. He told me to stop but I didn’t.”
He stopped talking, sensing the tears that were about to flow and he couldn’t even control it anymore. Sooner or later, he must tell sungjong everything. It’s sooner than what he does normally, but the man has the right to now.
“ But there was this one time, I got off with the wrong crowd. And we got arrested for drunk driving. We got beat up pretty bad.”
He remember how bad they looked. How he thought he could never walk again or that the bruises on his body and face would never fade away.
“ what happened?” sungjong asks.
“ My father went to the hospital and I was just too stubborn. I screamed at them, and I was such a bad son. His heart does not take stress easily. He started getting attacks-” He stopped short and just glanced at the tombstone. No one told him it’s his fault. No matter how much they all knew that it is his fault. He may not be the one to physically crush his father’s heart but he might as well did. All the stress he put his father through. All those harsh words he said. Not even giving money to them for the hospital bills because he was too damn proud to apologize.
That day at the funeral was his wake-up call. He threw his cellphone and cut off ties with his old friends. He told Tablo he is done with show business and that he will go back to school.
That evening, he pulls out his old diary and writes again.
He meets Woohyun for coffee that evening and reconnects with old friends. When he cam back in school, he met more. People said he has walls all around him and he puts them up for good measure. From the first upto the fourth wall, just to keep himself away from hurting others. His mother and his brother visits him when they can. An unspoken rule to never talk about his dark days. When his book came out and became a bestseller, the relationship with his family somehow became closer. He proved his worth. He rose from everything. But his father is dead. There are things you cannot take back no matter how hard you try.
His eyes never leave the tombstone, afraid to look up at sungjong and find out what the other is thinking about him.
“ You were really close, weren’t you?” he asks gently,
“ We were close, when I was a little kid. But when I started changing, I saw him as an enemy. Someone who wanted to tie me down in our province. I desperately wanted to be somebody you know? ” he laughs a little, thinking about his younger days. “ when a small town kid thinks of seoul, he thinks he can control the world. But it ended up being the other way around.”
“ But you’ve changed. Look, I see you. The first time we met, you were guarded. Even if you offered your help, I could see it in your eyes. You were waiting for me to turn away. But I’m not.” Myungsoo could not help but feel relieved. This is what he wanted to hear, that sungjong will stay. No matter how hard he is to put up with.
“ So, there is no way I’m getting rid of you?” he jokes and sungjong smiles.
“ No. and you must know that okay? Jiae and Woohyun warned me about you. So, I am saying this clearly. I want you. ” his words held no malice. Just a full and honest promise, Myungsoo just nods and kisses him on the cheek which makes the younger man blush.
“so, you’ve been conspiring with them?”
“no! no! ” sungjong waves his hand. “not conspiring. I am also friends with them now you know. We exchange emails once in awhile. ” he flushes some more and Myungsoo takes his hand, pushing him up.
“ you got off from work really early,” he changes the topic.
“ just two hours early. We did a lot of scenes and I am so tired.” Sungjong feigned helplessness and Myungsoo complied. Turning his back away from sungjong, he lowers himself.
“what?” sungjong asks.
“piggyback ride princess,” he says sweetly and wait for sungjong to comply. He does and climbs on his back as he wraps his arms around him. Myungsoo smiles to himself.
“ this is nice, uh- look. Do you want to have dinner tomorrow? I’ll order room service.”
“sure.” Myungsoo says plainly. He is too tired to fight this. Whatever this is they have between them. Maybe he has to accept that good things can actually happen to him even if he did not work hard for it. As a child, he always believed that he deserved nothing but a finite amount of joy. But right now, he feels the wind shift and maybe. Just maybe. He can have it all.
He drops sungjong at his hotel but as soon as they are at the lobby, he turns to him and he is smiling.
“ my bandmate and bestriend, Hoya is here! You should meet!” he looks so happy that Myungsoo could not say no. this seems only fair, isn’t it? He met all his friends and yet, he does not even know his band members in person. Plus, if things will go well and progress he might want to get to know everyone close to sungjong’s heart.
They arrive at his room and as it swung open, it revealed the man that was supposed to be Hoya. He has brown hair and a chiselled jaw that women want. Plus his thick eyebrows are a plus too.
“ You must be myungsoo,” Hoya tells him and they shake hands as he adds, “sungjong never shuts up about you- so I thought, might as well see who you are. ”
Sungjong flushes and kicks Hoya but Myungsoo is amused. Very amused.
“ really, well. Here I am. Kim Myungsoo. ” he says fondly and sungjong pushes them both to go infront of the television to talk. Sungjong says something about preparing drinks and food and left the two alone. Myungsoo feels like this is a test, he needs to pass this.
“ so, I heard you’re a popular author.”
“the books Is much more popular,’ he counters.
“ I read it, you’re good. Atleast he now dates grown men with brains.” Hoya huffs and myungsoo recognizes that tone.
“ did he uh- date- ”
“ did he date idiots before? Ofcourse he did. I mean, he is a wonderful person. Our sungjong, he’s got a big heart and his innocence is endearing. But some people, they take advantage of him. That’s why we all look out for him. ”
“ I understand,” Myungsoo replies, looking around, he sees sungjong looking through bottles and packs of food. Hoya probably brought them for him.
“ He has a knack for picking them you know. Bastards and jerks. He is inexplicably attracted to them.” He looks toward me and feigns ignorance. “ so I wonder, what part of you is a jerk?”
The question is straightforward and I am not even angry. This man does not know me. He does not care about graciousness or courtesy, he is here to see me. To see if I am good enough for sungjong.
“ Uh. I get really caught up when I am writing. I can go for two days without talking to anyone and even eating properly when it happens. Also, I am painfully quiet so he might have a hard time getting secrets and thoughts out of me.” He stops, thinking. “ I kick my friends out of my home when they come unannounced, but they never listen to me. I also take photographs of innocent animals and trees without their permission.” He finishes and Hoya’s lips transform into a wide smile.
“ I think we will get along myungsoo. I really think we will. ” he says and myungsoo relaxes. But his curiosity is still there.
“mind me asking, who did he date?” he asked nonchalantly but hoya caught on.
“ ask him yourself. He will answer them, don’t worry. He is just shy, cause the ones he dated were jerks. I mean, you wouldn’t want to boast about those right?” he stops for a moment and tells sungjong about some meat that should be kept on the fridge. “ then he has you, this amazing author who has nice friends and - you are all literate and shit.”
Myungsoo gathers these in his head and it comes to him, Sungjong feels like he is not worthy of him. But it’s the other way around, he thinks for himself. Sungjong has the youth and his career. He has the grace and the friendly nature that made his friends clamor over him.
“ I am not that great.” He replies.
“ well, he thinks you are. ” Hoya says and Sungjong finally comes in, with some drinks and chips.
They spend less than an hour watching a game show, trying to answer the questions. He is happy to see sungjong like this, with someone he knows. A friend. They talk about upcoming recordings and songwriting sessions. Even how they will promote. Hoya says his goodbye, telling them that he needs to visit someone.They say goodbye and as soon as the door shuts and they go back to the couch- Myungsoo can’t help it. He wants to ask. Really, really wants to ask.
“so-” he begins.
“what did he tell you?” sungjong says.
“ not much, just -he likes me and that you are so lucky to have me,” Myungsoo jokes and Sungjong turns to him, his eyes all serious.
“ I guess I am.” He replies and Myungsoo backtracks.
“ Look, it was fine. I expected it, plus Hoya, I think he has that strong attitude. He has the leader aura in him, so- ”
“ yes, he is that way. He is our CEO’s favourite. Because he works crazy hard and he produces results. At the same time, he can even take care of us,.” Sungjong says in wonder and bites his lip.
“he also told me you dated a lot. ” Myungsoo asked the question like this. Open-ended. He can either brush it off and blame his youth or tell him the sordid truth. It felt like an hour, but only a few seconds and sungjong answered.
“what do you want to know? Past dating history?” he asked, looking all embarrassed.
“ look, I just want to know okay. We all make our mistakes, I did. I told you right, worse than whoever you dated.” Myungsoo offers.
“ I know. But it’s- I am not perfect, I screwed up too. And I want you to see me as someone perfect, even if it’s not true.” Sungjong tells him, eyes wide and hands wringing. Frantic. “I mean, your friends and people see me as this pop star and some people might think that is enough for you. But it’s not. I am nothing but a child to you.” Myungsoo is about to cut in, in protest but sungjong stops him.
“ You are incredibly smart. You wrote that book, you are from Korea and you produced an international bestseller. You read a lot of books, which means you know a lot. Plus, you obviously know a lot about business as well. Jiae tells me that you balance everything and I just-”
Myungsoo grabs his hand, squeezing it tight and he stops.
“ Look, we both have great things and absolutely bad things about us. But I am willing to accept and compromise everything. If that means I can have you.” He says finally. It surprises him how quickly those words came out and how much he means it. Really, everything does not matter if in the end, they can get to be together. If It’s easy, it won’t mean anything. Sungjong stares at him in wonder, like he is the most fascinating thing he ever saw.
“ I’m just- I can’t believe I got it right this time.” He whispers.
“what me? Look, like you- I am not way perfect. I hang out graveyards when I have nothing to do.” He says in a self-depreciating tone but sungjong does not stop.
“ No, No. it’s they always tell me that I have the talent and everything. But I have no luck in love. You know, how they say we can’t have everything? That’s it. I always believed I will be unlucky, but I found you.” He blushed furiously and Myungsoo wanted to tell him it’s fine and that it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
“ yah! Your expectations of me ar too high!” he complains and sungjong punches him.
“ you like it!”
“so, who is that- who was hoya talking about? The one you dated, he seemed really pissed. ”
He hesitates for a moment.
“ his name is Taemin. He is a member of another boyband, but that was before the band and I got famous.” His face is turned down, refusing to meet myungsoo’s face. “ his band just started and- you know, we had the same friends and I also wanted to be like him one day. We became friends and more. But he started being too controlling. We broke up and the band, with hoya and the guys. It took off. We became successful. And, once, I met Taemin at a concert, and he told me that he will tell the media about us. ”
Myungsoo tensed at that,
“ he is blackmailing you? ”
“ No. no. I don’t. I don’t know if he is just playing with me. And if he says that, his reputation will go down as well. ”
“ you should sue him.” Myungsoo says.
“ I don’t want to do that. Plus, it was like, a year or less ago. We haven’t talked. No threats.” Sungjong smiles at him, then ducks in for a quick kiss on the lips. Just a quick touch of their mouths and myungsoo frowns.
“are you trying to distract me?”
“whatever for?”
“ your horrid ex-boyfriend?” he retorts.
“no, I promise. It’s fine. Really,”
“ so why bribe me with kisses?”
“I am not bribing you. I just want to kiss you.,” he laughs and literally attacks me myungsoo. Pushing him, pinning him on the couch. Myungsoo thinks he should be the one taking the lead, but lets the other do it anyway. He likes this. Losing himself.
“ this is sordid.” Myungsoo exclaims as they kiss.
“why?”
“ I mean, in a couch, at the hotel room. Really?” they both chuckle and sungjong looks at him.
“why? Do you want to move to your house? ”
“ You can move in and live with me. ” SHIT. Myungsoo tells himself and they both freeze at his words. How can he ruin the mood with his words? Really? This will get good and without interruption and he has to open his mouth.
“I mean-” he starts and stop.
“ you mean it?” sungjong asks.
“ Yes, you can move in. you still have a month and two weeks of shoot. I can drive you to work everyday.” He says and sungjong lights up.
“Okay, I’ll tell my manager and the producers.” He says simply and kisses him once more.slowly this time- biting his lower lip and myungsoo moans. Shamelessly.
Sungjong kept tugging until Myungsoo rose to his feet.
And so Sungjong kissed Myungsoo for th nth time. he couldn't even keep count. not because it was not important, but because every kiss felt knew. blwe his mind away and every other kiss turned non-existent. But this wasn't sweet or tender. It was hard and hungry and angry, and their hands didn't stroke or caress skin, they pulled hair and yanked at robe buttons and belts and zippers. "You're sure about this?" Myungsoo asked as he removed Sungjong's top and Sunghong pushed him backwards towards the bed.
"Shut up, ." he said and thank god the bed was close.
After that, they didn't talk. Their hands were insistent down the front of underpants, gripping because they couldn't get rid of their clothing fast enough. Myungsoo's hand on Sungjong wasn't especially gentle and Sungjong didn't want it to be. He needed this, a passion strong enough to beat the grief and isolation out of him, make him feel something, make his heart beat faster, make him live. And for a few minutes, it was all about the fast slide of palms over engorged flesh, up and down, up and down, and the bright streaks of ecstasy like falling stars behind Sungjong's closed eyelids. His mouth was open and pressed to Myungsoo's but they didn't kiss, mostly just breathed each other as Myungsoo's body weighed his down into the mattress.
People mark each other as their own with ink and pen. in paper and contracts. That was their life before. but now, it's different. this is them , marking each other in the very sense of the word. It doesn't matter if they had lovers before. if their bodies were used by other and their lips crushed by another. what matters is now. who they are and what they will become now that they are together.
This was better than kissing or make-out sessions, even though Myungsoo's rhythm wasn't quite as fast as Sungjong might have liked and he sometimes paused at the wrong moment. But it was better because the exact nature of Myungsoo's touch came unanticipated, more arousing for the startle, and Myungsoo's little noises of intense lust sent flutters all through Sungjong's chest and belly and groin. He relished the feel of Myungsoo's erection in his grip, spongy and hot and soft on the surface like doeskin. It stiffened further as the insistent pound of Sungjong's hand pushed him closer to the edge even as Sungjong felt himself pushed that way too. "Faster," he breathed, grunting as Myungsoo obeyed, his hand almost frantic with speed. Then Sungjong felt it start, the warm rush from his balls through the length of his prick and the sharp spike of orgasm like an arrow to the spine. Myungsoo squeezed so hard it almost hurt as Sungjong spurted against his fingers, groaning wild in his throat and Myungsoo followed him over the brink, his hips pushing against Sungjong's abdomen, his semen coating Sungjong's skin.
They both kept stroking a little to finish, then their hands stilled. Myungsoo's forehead dropped against Sungjong's half-bare shoulder. Sungjong felt boneless, and hot and sweaty despite the r cold. Their clothes were all twisted around in uncomfortable ways and their hands were sticky. "You're on top," Sujngong murmured against Myungsoo's hair. "You get to clean up first."
Myungsoo grunted and rolled off Sungjong to sit up. His trousers were around his ankles and his robe pushed up to his waist. He divested himself of both and went to the toilet in his underpants, socks and a t-shirt. Sungjong watched through half-closed lids, getting out of his own clothing and leaving them in a pile on the floor beside Myungsoo's. When Myungsoo was done, they traded places, and when Sungjong emerged, naked now, Myungsoo had the sheets down and was waiting, lamps out and only the low light from light posts outside. Sungjong hurried over the wooden floor and dived in beside Myungsoo. They still didn't talk about anything that mattered, just low murmurs, their kisses gentle now and a bit sleepy, fingers tender on skin and hair. Sungjong no longer felt alone, but he supposed he hadn't been before. Myungsoo had been there all along.
//
It was a Wednesday Morning when Sungyeol came barging into his bookstore and Jiae was delighted to see him. They talked for a while and Myungsoo dreaded the worse as sungyeol came close, his laptop on hand. He has a plan.
“ please, I had a good day. And I feel this week will be better. But please,” myungsoo starts and Sungyeol whacks him on the head.
“ you know what, sometimes, you are more ungrateful than my students.”
“ you mean your preschool kids? Those kids, whose parents pay you disgusting amounts of money?”
“oh shut up. Stop mocking my profession. I teach them the way of the world,” he says with a flourish and myungsoo snorts.
“whatever, your brain had been brainwashed by those kids, you act like them too.”
“ don’t change the subject. Look,” he opens his laptop and myungsoo peers.
“ what am I supposed to be seeing? ” he asks.
“ YOUR ARCH ENEMY YOU IDIOT!” He scolds him, pointing to the screen and he reads. It’s a Wikipedia page of a man named, LEE TAEMIN. Is this?
Myungsoo buries his hands on his face. Really? Why did he think it was a good idea to tell sungyeol about taemin. Sungyeol came into his house, sulking that he is not sharing his love life. Guilt trip. Then myungsoo tells the story and the taemin issue just slips. Even the one that he supposedly blackmailed (sort of) sungjong. And sungyeol immediately felt concerned, like it’s his life mission to know more about taemin. “the enemy” he says.
“don’t tell me- ”
“ this is just a wiki page Myung, just read about him. There are lots of sites about him and facts and shut. But this is like a summary, you know. To know the competition. ”
“ I am not competing, they are not together and-”
“ I said read it. Okay, I know sungjong is completely into you. But who knows, this kid. I mean, he looks like someone who will seduce married woman and men. ” his voice is full of conspiracy and malice. Myungsoo should tell him to leave, but decides against it. If this kid decided to try and waltz back into sungjong’s life. He should be prepared.
He reads it and finds out that he is from a band as well. He dances really well and sings well too. He does commercials and from a popular entertainment company. He also did a bit of acting. It is also included that he is close to sungjong even before he shot to fame. There is also a picture of them.
“I tried to erase that part of the article man, but someone kept on putting it up there.” Sungjong said, irritated.
“ Look, thank you man, but- ”
“I mean, it’s not because I’m your friend. But you are better looking, plus you have this older man charisma. ”
“ I am not an old man, I am just three years older than him, ”
“ but you are an old soul. I mean, even for us, you are wiser than your years.” He says and myungsoo agrees with that.
“so?” he asks.
“so what? What do you want me to do? March over and demand for a dance off?” myungsoo says and sungyeol’s eyes go wide.
“that’s genius!” he exclaims.
“shut up! Look, I am not going to do anything. I don’t have too. I just had to know, who he is, it’s sungjong’s past and. ”
“ I am digging more about him, don’t worry.”
Myungsoo huffs and sungyeol takes it upon himself to sit on with him and search. He uses the keywords Lee Taemin and searches frantically. He leaves him alone and spends time with his books. Jiae eyes him.
“don’t worry! He won’t come back to Taemin.” She says and myungsoo rolls his eyes at her.
“ why are you all so invested in this?”
“sungyeol told me. And I know, I know you feel like we shouldn’t do this. But Sungjong is our friend too. We want to protect him too. ”
“ okay, but really. I just, we’re okay. Jiae, sungjong and I. we are fine. ”
Jiae smiles at him. “ I always knew you’d have the best love story. ”
“whatever! You’ve been reading too much romance novels! ”
He tries to help some more customers but sungyeol is frantic and calls him over.
“what?” he asks and sungyeol is ponting at the frontpage of a search site. He looks at it. It’s about sungjong as the title says and it has a blurry picture with it, it’s the two of them. They are not kissing, but about to or just after they kissed. His insides is churning as he reads the title.
“rockstar’s night out”
And the article said all about this mysterious guys he is hooking up with and how everyone will be devastated that he is off the market. His insides freeze and sungyeol is calling him, while jiae is shaking him.
“what- how- ” he says but nothing came out. He thinks about sungjong, what his managers will say. Even the producers of the film. What his fans and the general public will say.
“ I have to go.”
He says quickly and leaves, but before he does, he picks up his phone. Sungjong is not answering. He tenses with that, this means the news came to him already. Maybe he is now in a meeting with executives from the company he works for. Shit. Shit. Shit. It’s all over his head. Instead, he leaves a voice mail. And he says it.
“ Hey, I love you. I will fix this. ”
===
A/N:
I forgot, i did not post it on LJ. i was just updating it on AFF. PSSSH. dunno why i forgot.