Continue.
Definitely not getting attention tonight. He's already asleep. But then again who wouldn't fall asleep after spending a complete day playing a video game that they've already beat.
I don't know, lately I've been starting to feel so insignificant. There have been so many other days and nights like tonight where I would come over and he'd be playing a game or on the computer and rarely he'd be watching TV. I'd come over just to be ignored or paid little attention too. And then there are night like tonight. Or rather this morning, whatever. Anyways, I saw something about coming to bed and I don't actually mean going to bed as in sleeping, just an excuse to get him off the computer. But he takes it literal. No goodnight kiss, not hug, no touching, no sex, just a goodnight and off to sleep he goes. Well, I'm glad he can sleep so peacefully. I can't. Not when I'm over here. I let it get to me. I let it bother so much that it takes me longer to fall asleep. I'm so irritated and depressed right now that I wanna wake him up just so he'd be pissed and hopefully have trouble falling asleep again. I just miss the old days, where he'd tell me sweet things and hold me. When I actually felt needed and wanted. Now I feel like he doesn't even want me around, much less talk to me. Not only that, he won't even spend time with me. OUTSIDE of the fucking house. I'm tired of sitting around watching him do nothing while other couples are out having fun, actually enjoying each others company. Oh gawd. I miss the days where he'd check this stupid livejournal EVERY time I posted, just so he knew what I was thinking that day or how I felt about something. This would be my third time crying tonight. Ugh. I feel so helpless, pitiful, and WEAK. I wish I could tell it to his face how I feel. Not like he'd care. Or understand. Gawd, how could someone who makes me feel so happy also make me feel so miserable?
He just rolled over. Stupid me for thinking he'd try to get me off the computer.
I'm almost on the edge. I need to get him to understand how I feel. That I can't be the only one trying in this relationship.
I'm gonna try and get some sleep. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Goodnight.
I don't know, lately I've been starting to feel so insignificant. There have been so many other days and nights like tonight where I would come over and he'd be playing a game or on the computer and rarely he'd be watching TV. I'd come over just to be ignored or paid little attention too. And then there are night like tonight. Or rather this morning, whatever. Anyways, I saw something about coming to bed and I don't actually mean going to bed as in sleeping, just an excuse to get him off the computer. But he takes it literal. No goodnight kiss, not hug, no touching, no sex, just a goodnight and off to sleep he goes. Well, I'm glad he can sleep so peacefully. I can't. Not when I'm over here. I let it get to me. I let it bother so much that it takes me longer to fall asleep. I'm so irritated and depressed right now that I wanna wake him up just so he'd be pissed and hopefully have trouble falling asleep again. I just miss the old days, where he'd tell me sweet things and hold me. When I actually felt needed and wanted. Now I feel like he doesn't even want me around, much less talk to me. Not only that, he won't even spend time with me. OUTSIDE of the fucking house. I'm tired of sitting around watching him do nothing while other couples are out having fun, actually enjoying each others company. Oh gawd. I miss the days where he'd check this stupid livejournal EVERY time I posted, just so he knew what I was thinking that day or how I felt about something. This would be my third time crying tonight. Ugh. I feel so helpless, pitiful, and WEAK. I wish I could tell it to his face how I feel. Not like he'd care. Or understand. Gawd, how could someone who makes me feel so happy also make me feel so miserable?
He just rolled over. Stupid me for thinking he'd try to get me off the computer.
I'm almost on the edge. I need to get him to understand how I feel. That I can't be the only one trying in this relationship.
I'm gonna try and get some sleep. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Goodnight.