(no subject)
Yeah, today was just a shit day. I hung out with someone I didnt want to because the only reason she hangs out with me when she nees something. One of my close friends from my past randomly calls me out of the blue last night and askes me if I want to hang out. Oh, and then the next day she never calls me. I was supposes to hang out with my friend Liz but she was being weird and then I tried to give my phone number to through one of friends. I would call her and give to her myself but she is never in her room and this way was just simpler. but her friend never showed up and I went outside to meet her twice. I called my other friend just to talk to her and she picks the phone up and hangs up. I fucking believe this and well I had one last thing planned and well even that fell through, but with the shit that happened today I kinda saw it coming. All it makes me think RAGE!!!!! I am so fucking angry now. Oh, and I call someone else I know just to hang out with for a minute and she is complete ignoring me to. So you know what if people dont want to see me. FUCK EM' ALL! FUCK AND EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM! I thinks its time for me to drop of the map for a little while. I am just really really fucking angry at people right now, and I know that there other shit that happened today and possible at the end of tomorrow, but doesnt always sound convient (sp.)that I happened to forget this other stuff. I am just a jerk or maybe an asshole and maybe everyone should just leave me the fuck alone. I'm not right, I just wrong nothing nothing nothing. Unfit, a burden. All I can see is rage and all I know is that I am fucked up and poeple know that so they keep their distant. And they say this and that about how its not true but I sick of it, its bullshit. I know u just think I am fucked up and I am and I hate myself for it. I'm fucked up and nobody want to get close to that nobody. I understand that now. I am just a ghost not a man neve a man. Hate me, loathe me, I cant stand I know what your all thinking why dont you all just stop pretending you want to know me and abandon me like you know uou really wnat to. I know it none you could love me why would you all I ever do is hurt and I am just so fucked up. NO NON NON NO NON NO NO it isnt true no could love me. I I'm tired and I no more no more just no more stop stop stop no no no no no no no no njo no no ion on no ono n o no no no no no no end of end of end of end