I hate to post another article that makes my blood boil, but this one really got under my skin...
Dear CNN,
Was it really THAT slow of a news day that you needed to write an entire article about an apparently best-selling "fashion" book which seems to just be a big steaming pile of (well-intentioned and even more well-marketed) fat-shaming? I've usually got a thicker skin about this sort of thing, but this article really is one of the worst I've seen in a long time...
So here's the actual article, in case you're interested: http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/homestyle/03/31/never.look.fat.again/index.html?hpt=Sbin (opens in a new window).
Okay, so when I saw the link to the story titled "Look thinner in 'no fat' clothes" I was prepared for, at worst, a good laugh about the usual ZOMG SHINY FORM-FITTING IS BAD AND EVIL and LOOKING FAT IS THE ENEMY silliness. My personal attitude towards most of life is that I prefer to laugh than to get mad. If I don't laugh at this stuff - or myself - I'd just go crazy with it all. But there's something about this article that just got under my skin and made me start thinking more deeply about fat hate-speech. Perhaps it was that sexist, cliche of a first paragraph with the whole "find a boyfriend or husband" to replace your mirror bit, and the lame (and never used in real life) "does this make me look fat?" question. I immediately began to roll my eyes, but kept reading none the less... And while my final conclusion is that the authors (of both the article and the book) may possibly have the best of intentions, they're doling out every single piece of advice with a rhetorical kick in the (horrible fat) face.
Some of my personal favorites...
on HOPE!:
"But there is hope. She says even women size16 or 18 can look their best if they make the right choices."
Because we all know that anything over a 16/18 can't ever look good? Apparently there's no hope left for us deathfattie size 28s. No amount of dark, matte fabrics, spanx and higher-waisted jeans can save me from the evils of looking fat.
on TRENDS:
"Transparency is big now, but if you have fat, you don't want the world to see that - you want to cover it up."
Yeah, yeah, I know, nobody wants to see our horrible fat. blah blah blah...
on CELEBRITIES:
" She says the celebrities that always look good in their clothes are Sandra Bullock and Demi Moore."
Um... maybe that's because they're skinny, rich, have personal chefs, personal trainers, personal plastic surgeons... No, of course, it's because they know the secrets of wearing "low fat clothes." Right.
on SHAPEWEAR:
In addition to the high-waisted girdle requirement, she also recommends "wearing a control camisole over your bra to 'compress and flatten' the roll that could follow you everywhere." OH NO! That awful fat roll is following me again! I should just get a restraining order... meanwhile I'll just encase myself head to toe in restrictive shapewear so that nobody knows a thing. *wink*
Of course women generally want to look thinner in their clothes. I'm deathfat, myself, and love those certain outfits in my closet that make me feel, well, if not "skinny" then maybe slightly less deathfat. :-) So yeah, a book about how to dress to look thinner is hardly revolutionary, and these are all things we've heard a thousand times before (What's that? A "long billowy sleeve can hide fatty arms"? Gosh, I never thought of that before...)
It's just the turn of phrase in much of the article (and source book) that drove me nuts. I know this sounds like I'm just on a normal fatshame-rage-rant, but I really truly want to know from you, my fearless fellow fatshionistas - just where is the line between speech that is merely disturbing or denigrating and true "hate speech"? Where do YOU personally draw that line? When do you decide to just suck it up and take it and when do you decide to fight back because what is being said is just plain WRONG? I feel like half the time I try and stand up for myself against these sorts of things, I get slammed with the whole patronizing "you're too sensitive" crap, or the "just ignore it and it will go away" nonsense. I really am conflicted here, and want to know what others think, what experiences you've had in the past in standing up against fat hate-speech. How and where do you draw the line, and do you feel like you even have the ability to draw that line without being patronized for it?
Was it really THAT slow of a news day that you needed to write an entire article about an apparently best-selling "fashion" book which seems to just be a big steaming pile of (well-intentioned and even more well-marketed) fat-shaming? I've usually got a thicker skin about this sort of thing, but this article really is one of the worst I've seen in a long time...
So here's the actual article, in case you're interested: http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/homestyle/03/31/never.look.fat.again/index.html?hpt=Sbin (opens in a new window).
Okay, so when I saw the link to the story titled "Look thinner in 'no fat' clothes" I was prepared for, at worst, a good laugh about the usual ZOMG SHINY FORM-FITTING IS BAD AND EVIL and LOOKING FAT IS THE ENEMY silliness. My personal attitude towards most of life is that I prefer to laugh than to get mad. If I don't laugh at this stuff - or myself - I'd just go crazy with it all. But there's something about this article that just got under my skin and made me start thinking more deeply about fat hate-speech. Perhaps it was that sexist, cliche of a first paragraph with the whole "find a boyfriend or husband" to replace your mirror bit, and the lame (and never used in real life) "does this make me look fat?" question. I immediately began to roll my eyes, but kept reading none the less... And while my final conclusion is that the authors (of both the article and the book) may possibly have the best of intentions, they're doling out every single piece of advice with a rhetorical kick in the (horrible fat) face.
Some of my personal favorites...
on HOPE!:
"But there is hope. She says even women size16 or 18 can look their best if they make the right choices."
Because we all know that anything over a 16/18 can't ever look good? Apparently there's no hope left for us deathfattie size 28s. No amount of dark, matte fabrics, spanx and higher-waisted jeans can save me from the evils of looking fat.
on TRENDS:
"Transparency is big now, but if you have fat, you don't want the world to see that - you want to cover it up."
Yeah, yeah, I know, nobody wants to see our horrible fat. blah blah blah...
on CELEBRITIES:
" She says the celebrities that always look good in their clothes are Sandra Bullock and Demi Moore."
Um... maybe that's because they're skinny, rich, have personal chefs, personal trainers, personal plastic surgeons... No, of course, it's because they know the secrets of wearing "low fat clothes." Right.
on SHAPEWEAR:
In addition to the high-waisted girdle requirement, she also recommends "wearing a control camisole over your bra to 'compress and flatten' the roll that could follow you everywhere." OH NO! That awful fat roll is following me again! I should just get a restraining order... meanwhile I'll just encase myself head to toe in restrictive shapewear so that nobody knows a thing. *wink*
Of course women generally want to look thinner in their clothes. I'm deathfat, myself, and love those certain outfits in my closet that make me feel, well, if not "skinny" then maybe slightly less deathfat. :-) So yeah, a book about how to dress to look thinner is hardly revolutionary, and these are all things we've heard a thousand times before (What's that? A "long billowy sleeve can hide fatty arms"? Gosh, I never thought of that before...)
It's just the turn of phrase in much of the article (and source book) that drove me nuts. I know this sounds like I'm just on a normal fatshame-rage-rant, but I really truly want to know from you, my fearless fellow fatshionistas - just where is the line between speech that is merely disturbing or denigrating and true "hate speech"? Where do YOU personally draw that line? When do you decide to just suck it up and take it and when do you decide to fight back because what is being said is just plain WRONG? I feel like half the time I try and stand up for myself against these sorts of things, I get slammed with the whole patronizing "you're too sensitive" crap, or the "just ignore it and it will go away" nonsense. I really am conflicted here, and want to know what others think, what experiences you've had in the past in standing up against fat hate-speech. How and where do you draw the line, and do you feel like you even have the ability to draw that line without being patronized for it?