hide and seek

[fathead113]

its weird when you think that you are going to miss something so much that you can't take it and then you come to find out that you don't really miss it at all. thats the way that i feel about the whole dance thing i mean i love dance with all of my heart it has been my life for 14 years but this past year there just wasn't something right and i made the decision to not take anymore earlier this year.... well tonight i went back to jazz for the first time in a while and i realized that as much as i love to dance i'm not upset that i quit i mean tonight was amazing getting to go in there and take class and not have to worry at all what anyone else was thinking about me but in the end i realized that i am a different person now i have grown up i mean i looked at myself in the mirror and i was like i don't even recognize you and thats scary it freaked me out.

how can something that you loved for so long just all the sudden make you so unhappy i mean i know that no one really understands what i'm talking about but for a long time dance made me feel like i was trapped and i needed out of there and now that i have i look back and yeah i miss all of my girls because they are my sisters but i was/am so different that any of those girls and most of them just don't get me so i'm sorry to anyof you girls that are reading this and have felt like i was ditching you guys cause i was lazy but trust me there is so much more behind all of this than i was lazy.
*sorry for spilling my guts on my livejournal haha*