XXXHOLIC FIC: says the thief to the piper
Oh boy. I've only seen up to episode twenty-four because Netflix is terribly mean, but I promised outragedy that I'd whip something up and so here I am? So there.
SAYS THE THIEF TO THE PIPER
your growing pains are just so large. five facts (terrible habits, honestly) that Watanuki knows about Yuuko. and then there’s the one he keeps for himself, of course.
xxxholic. general spoilers | 2,273 words | pg | yuuko/watanuki
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1. “It’s a rule! There should always be a full row of bottles on the shelves.”
In theory -
and really, honestly, you'd think that it would just in that, "in theory -" but no, no, it really doesn't -
Anyways.
In theory, he should be able to blame Mokona who, by all means, is a prime candidate for alcoholism, considering the amount of whiskey he consumes daily. Hourly, if he’s feeling mean.
This is so not the case though.
"It's simple really," Yuuko explains. Her eyes flash and she sinks into the counter. He wants to tell her how totally gross that is and if you're in the kitchen, you should be aware of hygiene - it really isn't that hard.
But he's groaning already.
"Now, now Watanuki." She waves her hand. The end of her kimono opens over her legs. He sees so much skin. So much skin! "It's simple," she repeats. "I need you to go in and do an inventory count -"
"Of the booze," he says dryly.
"Of the booze," she agrees. She's serious then. "I think there are a couple of bottles missing."
"Oh boy." Her eyes narrow at him. He shrugs.
"I'm particular about my booze, Watanuki, and it's too warm for any sort of sake today. I like when the glass sweats! I like the romance and we could - oh, ooo we could set the mood and -"
It is not his fault that she shifts forward.
It is not his fault that the slip of fabric, just over her breasts - and okay, he's a growing boy, okay - opens and he sees more skin, so much skin. This isn't fair. She shouldn't be sitting on the counter and he should, by all rights, tell her about how he cooks meat right there and how all the desserts go there and oh, wow, she is in his face.
Her fingers poke his cheek. "Okay, Watanuki?"
"Er, okay," he manages, and then doesn't know what exactly he's agreed to.
It's always whiskey anyway.
2. “Always bring a present - seriously, who doesn’t like treats? Everybody likes treats. You’re not normal if you don’t.”
He brings her a bumper sticker.
Good intentions! So many good intentions.
Cancer is apparently a smiling face, holding a cardboard sign that says don't be a dope, dope.
"Here," he shoves it into her hand awkwardly. His cheeks are flushed. She raises an eyebrow. "I had an extra one," he mutters, and seriously, this would be one of those moments where Domeki should just head in and awkwardly insert himself into the conversation like he always does and how rude, how rude! But wow, he could so use it.
"You should really give it to Mokona," she says, amused.
"Shut up. I wanted to give it to you. God."
She rolls her eyes. "You could have just brought me a treat! Or sake. Or sake-flavored treats! Oh, could you."
He sighs. But it's really something, when Yuuko shifts in between moods, from serious to teasing to actual genuine delight. He likes that. You just can't tell her.
No seriously. You can't.
But it happens then, when she sits back on the lounge, spread against it. The silk of her wrap drapes over the side and he is half-expecting Mokona and the girls to stumble out, full of delight and amusement. The bumper sticker dangles from her fingers and then, only then, does she slide the cigar into her mouth, lighting it up.
There is a snap. The smoke cracks in the air.
He watches, fascinated. Her lips purse, circling the end of the cigar. He licks his lips too. Her eyes are bright.
"It's the thought that counts anyway," she says lazily.
"Uh-huh," he murmurs. She raises an eyebrow and he flushes. "I mean, whatever. The habit's gross."
Don't be a dope, dope!
The corners of her mouth turn.
( - okay so don't tell, don't tell because there is Himawari and there is Himawari and she is really, really pretty and cute and like, all he wants to do is steal one kiss - one kiss! - but then later, after Mokona is passed out somewhere between the room and the hallway and Maru and Moro are giggling, just outside, something about the moon and might - what is he supposed to know, okay, it's like sometimes they make sense and he's just terrible at riddles, obviously - but Yuuko is back in his space, hovering over him (she supposedly dropped something under the chaise, liar) and she does that thing with smoke and rings and mid-air -
the problem is that it touches his mouth and it's almost, almost like she's kissed him -
so he's the dope in this one.)
3. “This isn’t goldfish, Watanuki. Who plays goldfish anymore? Pour me more sake though - it’s time for a lesson.”
Do not make a bet with Yuuko.
He isn't an idiot, okay. This is one of those things where he, like, takes it all too close to heart.
But people should really learn how to finish that sentence.
Do not make a bet with Yuuko when it comes to playing cards.
1. She totally cheats.
2. She totally cheats.
3. She totally cheats and, AND doesn't apologize for it. Rude.
But this is how he totally ends up in his underwear. Just his underwear. It's not very nice underwear, but then -
This is the third time around.
You'd think he'd learn, right?
"Watanuki is terrible at this!" Mokona says cheerfully. Yuuko chuckles.
"Watanuki is terrible!" Maru echoes. Moro is more somber. "Watanuki should know better," she says too.
"I'm so cold," he mutters.
"Nonsense," Yuuko drawls. She flashes a wicked smile. "You're doing fine," she says, and reaches over, pinching his arm for effect.
He blushes, okay. He can't help it. Because he's back to her being close, way too close - it's so different when it's private except not because Yuuko is no Himawari and there is nothing innocent about her. She's - she's - she's Yuuko! And sometimes, if he's really honest (she doesn't need to know) it's really about how close he gets to her and so what if he touched her, what would she do.
He swallows. Yuuko picks up the cards.
"I think," she says to Mokona and the girls. "Watanuki and I need to finish this last game ourselves. Right Watanuki?"
He holds up his hands. "No, no. Absolutely not."
"What are you a chicken?"
"You cheat," he blurts, accuses, and blurts and accuses - honestly, what else could he do.
"Chicken," she says, shrugging. “It’s your fault for letting your fear paralyze you.”
“I do no such thing!”
He is not an idiot. Seriously.
He is an idiot with a pillow in his lap.
Yuuko is smug. She twirls a strand of hair around her fingers, tilting her head to the side.
"Well?" she asks.
"You're an awful person," he mutters. Her grin is sharp.
"You'll learn," she says.
Then, before he knows it, she is slicing the deck and dealing out the cards and she's totally insane because he has no clothes left and he is so not losing the pillow. He has dignity. He has dignity!
"You mean you'll teach me how to cheat."
She grins again. Then she shifts onto her knees, leaning forward. She pokes him in the nose and then, she's hovering over him too. Her mouth grazes his cheek.
"Creativity," she says lightly. "It's about creativity," she says. "It's a good people skill, creativity."
"Cheating," he murmurs.
She hums into a laugh. It presses into his jaw and the pillow seems to slip, just against his thighs.
He is aware of more than just her kimono, and the silk, god that stupid silk, it's beyond the idea of her skin, and maybe, just maybe a hint of that softness and hey remember when he didn’t like that he sees spirits? He knows he is long and awkward; he knows that he thins into fitting together with someone, but then her fingers stop at her throat.
Watanuki can taste her name. He can feel the motion of his tongue, up to stick against the roof of his mouth, down to roll against his teeth, and yuuko just tastes so sly and sharp and so beyond him.
He thinks he just might be growing up. And fast enough.
That stupid pillow.
4. “Nothing good comes out of starting a story with there once was a girl. Blame only goes so far.”
Yuuko does not sleep.
He makes tea with whiskey.
He makes tea with brandy.
He makes tea with whiskey and brandy and Mokona finishes it off because Mokona is there waiting, not participating, when the riddles decide to come to life.
Most nights he can wake (when he stays which is more and more and more) and find her outside, knees turned to the side and the smoke hazy in the air.
"I enjoy what I can," she says to him once.
( - he gets it later, much later, when he can see, hear, want her in his sleep, when she hovers, when he can feel the ends of her hair as they drag and dangle over his chest and mouth and it feels so sweet, when he knows she isn't here - or is she - when he knows that it will always be fleeting, that reminder that perhaps, once, they could have lingered together.)
5. “I believe in many things.”
Domeki talks about it a lot.
He so doesn't listen. But whatever. Domeki talks a lot of nonsense and he really doesn't understand how he totally doesn't get to the point and really, it's not his fault that he tosses it right in when Himawari is right there all sparkly and pretty and just a delight.
Sometimes Watanuki listens though, okay?
"You should ask for the truth," he tells him once in his Domeki-is-such-an-ass-and-so-much-better-than-you voice. He totally does, okay. This isn’t the first time or the last time; today it’s just particularly strong. "I'm sure she'd tell you."
Watanuki frowns, turning his head up. The sky over the school is clear and warm. He never likes it when the sky is clear and warm. Nothing good comes this way like that.
"Yuuko isn't like that," he says stubbornly.
Domeki grunts. "Say you."
"Says me!" Watanuki pumps his fist. "And besides," he says seriously. "She does tell me in time, most of the time, and it's just that sometimes I get really, really -"
"Impatient," Domeki supplies.
Watanuki narrows his eyes. "Shut up."
Domeki shrugs.
But it's true, so true, true like with the fact Watanuki almost always makes a mean bento for lunch. He knows he's impatient. He knows it's just one of those things.
He also knows that he's not ready.
"Domeki says you're growing up."
Later, in the kitchen, Yuuko has found him and hangs over his shoulder, peeking at the snacks he's preparing. It's just the two of them, of course, considering that Maru and Moro have whisked Mokona into a really ridiculous game of tag.
She blows at his neck. He tries to swat her away. His cheeks are red and really, it's kind of like that time where -
No, it's nothing like that.
"Domeki is an ass," he mutters and the chocolate isn't looking right and god, they're all going to be so irritating if he doesn't finish this in time and it's not right.
But Yuuko is humming, and that's not usually a good sign - she doesn't even move from his shoulders.
"What are you doing?" he asks.
"Nothing," she says. Her fingers move to the back of his neck. They scratch lightly at his skin. He shivers. "You try so hard," she teases. Then she chuckles. "You're so sensitive, Watanuki. And no poker face - you’re insulting my teaching skills."
"You would know -"
He turns. Because he has to prove a point. Because with Yuuko he has to make a point and maybe, he thinks, this is what it's been building up to. Watanuki making points. Watanuki making all the points!
But Yuuko is suddenly all right there.
He doesn't finish his sentence. His awareness is vague, suddenly stopped over the fact that her hands have simply moved to rest against his chest. She is tall. She is imposing. She takes the entire room from him. He feels so awkward, flushing, and truth, right? This has to be about the truth.
His fingers brush against her chin.
"Sorry," he says, but he's not. He's not sorry.
"Do you think you're ready?" she asks.
His fingers move to her mouth. They hover. He feels them pucker and sigh. They're soft, wet. He thinks they should be sticky with some kind of sweet. A flush licks the line of his throat.
"No." His voice is hoarse. His teeth press lightly against his lip. "Probably not," he says.
It's the truth.
1. “Sometimes, it’s just long enough and - ” She smiles here. “Appreciate it, all right?”
- it’s most of the time, he thinks that she is close enough, just close enough, that he understands that she is waiting. If he goes back over it (and he does a lot) he'll rhyme and reason that he has plenty of things to ask her; was it for him, was it for death, was it for him and death or just that figure, the figure that stood over them and threw all of them into motion.
When Watanuki thinks of Yuuko now, it's often.
He loves luxuries after all.
SAYS THE THIEF TO THE PIPER
your growing pains are just so large. five facts (terrible habits, honestly) that Watanuki knows about Yuuko. and then there’s the one he keeps for himself, of course.
xxxholic. general spoilers | 2,273 words | pg | yuuko/watanuki
-
1. “It’s a rule! There should always be a full row of bottles on the shelves.”
In theory -
and really, honestly, you'd think that it would just in that, "in theory -" but no, no, it really doesn't -
Anyways.
In theory, he should be able to blame Mokona who, by all means, is a prime candidate for alcoholism, considering the amount of whiskey he consumes daily. Hourly, if he’s feeling mean.
This is so not the case though.
"It's simple really," Yuuko explains. Her eyes flash and she sinks into the counter. He wants to tell her how totally gross that is and if you're in the kitchen, you should be aware of hygiene - it really isn't that hard.
But he's groaning already.
"Now, now Watanuki." She waves her hand. The end of her kimono opens over her legs. He sees so much skin. So much skin! "It's simple," she repeats. "I need you to go in and do an inventory count -"
"Of the booze," he says dryly.
"Of the booze," she agrees. She's serious then. "I think there are a couple of bottles missing."
"Oh boy." Her eyes narrow at him. He shrugs.
"I'm particular about my booze, Watanuki, and it's too warm for any sort of sake today. I like when the glass sweats! I like the romance and we could - oh, ooo we could set the mood and -"
It is not his fault that she shifts forward.
It is not his fault that the slip of fabric, just over her breasts - and okay, he's a growing boy, okay - opens and he sees more skin, so much skin. This isn't fair. She shouldn't be sitting on the counter and he should, by all rights, tell her about how he cooks meat right there and how all the desserts go there and oh, wow, she is in his face.
Her fingers poke his cheek. "Okay, Watanuki?"
"Er, okay," he manages, and then doesn't know what exactly he's agreed to.
It's always whiskey anyway.
2. “Always bring a present - seriously, who doesn’t like treats? Everybody likes treats. You’re not normal if you don’t.”
He brings her a bumper sticker.
Good intentions! So many good intentions.
Cancer is apparently a smiling face, holding a cardboard sign that says don't be a dope, dope.
"Here," he shoves it into her hand awkwardly. His cheeks are flushed. She raises an eyebrow. "I had an extra one," he mutters, and seriously, this would be one of those moments where Domeki should just head in and awkwardly insert himself into the conversation like he always does and how rude, how rude! But wow, he could so use it.
"You should really give it to Mokona," she says, amused.
"Shut up. I wanted to give it to you. God."
She rolls her eyes. "You could have just brought me a treat! Or sake. Or sake-flavored treats! Oh, could you."
He sighs. But it's really something, when Yuuko shifts in between moods, from serious to teasing to actual genuine delight. He likes that. You just can't tell her.
No seriously. You can't.
But it happens then, when she sits back on the lounge, spread against it. The silk of her wrap drapes over the side and he is half-expecting Mokona and the girls to stumble out, full of delight and amusement. The bumper sticker dangles from her fingers and then, only then, does she slide the cigar into her mouth, lighting it up.
There is a snap. The smoke cracks in the air.
He watches, fascinated. Her lips purse, circling the end of the cigar. He licks his lips too. Her eyes are bright.
"It's the thought that counts anyway," she says lazily.
"Uh-huh," he murmurs. She raises an eyebrow and he flushes. "I mean, whatever. The habit's gross."
Don't be a dope, dope!
The corners of her mouth turn.
( - okay so don't tell, don't tell because there is Himawari and there is Himawari and she is really, really pretty and cute and like, all he wants to do is steal one kiss - one kiss! - but then later, after Mokona is passed out somewhere between the room and the hallway and Maru and Moro are giggling, just outside, something about the moon and might - what is he supposed to know, okay, it's like sometimes they make sense and he's just terrible at riddles, obviously - but Yuuko is back in his space, hovering over him (she supposedly dropped something under the chaise, liar) and she does that thing with smoke and rings and mid-air -
the problem is that it touches his mouth and it's almost, almost like she's kissed him -
so he's the dope in this one.)
3. “This isn’t goldfish, Watanuki. Who plays goldfish anymore? Pour me more sake though - it’s time for a lesson.”
Do not make a bet with Yuuko.
He isn't an idiot, okay. This is one of those things where he, like, takes it all too close to heart.
But people should really learn how to finish that sentence.
Do not make a bet with Yuuko when it comes to playing cards.
1. She totally cheats.
2. She totally cheats.
3. She totally cheats and, AND doesn't apologize for it. Rude.
But this is how he totally ends up in his underwear. Just his underwear. It's not very nice underwear, but then -
This is the third time around.
You'd think he'd learn, right?
"Watanuki is terrible at this!" Mokona says cheerfully. Yuuko chuckles.
"Watanuki is terrible!" Maru echoes. Moro is more somber. "Watanuki should know better," she says too.
"I'm so cold," he mutters.
"Nonsense," Yuuko drawls. She flashes a wicked smile. "You're doing fine," she says, and reaches over, pinching his arm for effect.
He blushes, okay. He can't help it. Because he's back to her being close, way too close - it's so different when it's private except not because Yuuko is no Himawari and there is nothing innocent about her. She's - she's - she's Yuuko! And sometimes, if he's really honest (she doesn't need to know) it's really about how close he gets to her and so what if he touched her, what would she do.
He swallows. Yuuko picks up the cards.
"I think," she says to Mokona and the girls. "Watanuki and I need to finish this last game ourselves. Right Watanuki?"
He holds up his hands. "No, no. Absolutely not."
"What are you a chicken?"
"You cheat," he blurts, accuses, and blurts and accuses - honestly, what else could he do.
"Chicken," she says, shrugging. “It’s your fault for letting your fear paralyze you.”
“I do no such thing!”
He is not an idiot. Seriously.
He is an idiot with a pillow in his lap.
Yuuko is smug. She twirls a strand of hair around her fingers, tilting her head to the side.
"Well?" she asks.
"You're an awful person," he mutters. Her grin is sharp.
"You'll learn," she says.
Then, before he knows it, she is slicing the deck and dealing out the cards and she's totally insane because he has no clothes left and he is so not losing the pillow. He has dignity. He has dignity!
"You mean you'll teach me how to cheat."
She grins again. Then she shifts onto her knees, leaning forward. She pokes him in the nose and then, she's hovering over him too. Her mouth grazes his cheek.
"Creativity," she says lightly. "It's about creativity," she says. "It's a good people skill, creativity."
"Cheating," he murmurs.
She hums into a laugh. It presses into his jaw and the pillow seems to slip, just against his thighs.
He is aware of more than just her kimono, and the silk, god that stupid silk, it's beyond the idea of her skin, and maybe, just maybe a hint of that softness and hey remember when he didn’t like that he sees spirits? He knows he is long and awkward; he knows that he thins into fitting together with someone, but then her fingers stop at her throat.
Watanuki can taste her name. He can feel the motion of his tongue, up to stick against the roof of his mouth, down to roll against his teeth, and yuuko just tastes so sly and sharp and so beyond him.
He thinks he just might be growing up. And fast enough.
That stupid pillow.
4. “Nothing good comes out of starting a story with there once was a girl. Blame only goes so far.”
Yuuko does not sleep.
He makes tea with whiskey.
He makes tea with brandy.
He makes tea with whiskey and brandy and Mokona finishes it off because Mokona is there waiting, not participating, when the riddles decide to come to life.
Most nights he can wake (when he stays which is more and more and more) and find her outside, knees turned to the side and the smoke hazy in the air.
"I enjoy what I can," she says to him once.
( - he gets it later, much later, when he can see, hear, want her in his sleep, when she hovers, when he can feel the ends of her hair as they drag and dangle over his chest and mouth and it feels so sweet, when he knows she isn't here - or is she - when he knows that it will always be fleeting, that reminder that perhaps, once, they could have lingered together.)
5. “I believe in many things.”
Domeki talks about it a lot.
He so doesn't listen. But whatever. Domeki talks a lot of nonsense and he really doesn't understand how he totally doesn't get to the point and really, it's not his fault that he tosses it right in when Himawari is right there all sparkly and pretty and just a delight.
Sometimes Watanuki listens though, okay?
"You should ask for the truth," he tells him once in his Domeki-is-such-an-ass-and-so-much-better-than-you voice. He totally does, okay. This isn’t the first time or the last time; today it’s just particularly strong. "I'm sure she'd tell you."
Watanuki frowns, turning his head up. The sky over the school is clear and warm. He never likes it when the sky is clear and warm. Nothing good comes this way like that.
"Yuuko isn't like that," he says stubbornly.
Domeki grunts. "Say you."
"Says me!" Watanuki pumps his fist. "And besides," he says seriously. "She does tell me in time, most of the time, and it's just that sometimes I get really, really -"
"Impatient," Domeki supplies.
Watanuki narrows his eyes. "Shut up."
Domeki shrugs.
But it's true, so true, true like with the fact Watanuki almost always makes a mean bento for lunch. He knows he's impatient. He knows it's just one of those things.
He also knows that he's not ready.
"Domeki says you're growing up."
Later, in the kitchen, Yuuko has found him and hangs over his shoulder, peeking at the snacks he's preparing. It's just the two of them, of course, considering that Maru and Moro have whisked Mokona into a really ridiculous game of tag.
She blows at his neck. He tries to swat her away. His cheeks are red and really, it's kind of like that time where -
No, it's nothing like that.
"Domeki is an ass," he mutters and the chocolate isn't looking right and god, they're all going to be so irritating if he doesn't finish this in time and it's not right.
But Yuuko is humming, and that's not usually a good sign - she doesn't even move from his shoulders.
"What are you doing?" he asks.
"Nothing," she says. Her fingers move to the back of his neck. They scratch lightly at his skin. He shivers. "You try so hard," she teases. Then she chuckles. "You're so sensitive, Watanuki. And no poker face - you’re insulting my teaching skills."
"You would know -"
He turns. Because he has to prove a point. Because with Yuuko he has to make a point and maybe, he thinks, this is what it's been building up to. Watanuki making points. Watanuki making all the points!
But Yuuko is suddenly all right there.
He doesn't finish his sentence. His awareness is vague, suddenly stopped over the fact that her hands have simply moved to rest against his chest. She is tall. She is imposing. She takes the entire room from him. He feels so awkward, flushing, and truth, right? This has to be about the truth.
His fingers brush against her chin.
"Sorry," he says, but he's not. He's not sorry.
"Do you think you're ready?" she asks.
His fingers move to her mouth. They hover. He feels them pucker and sigh. They're soft, wet. He thinks they should be sticky with some kind of sweet. A flush licks the line of his throat.
"No." His voice is hoarse. His teeth press lightly against his lip. "Probably not," he says.
It's the truth.
1. “Sometimes, it’s just long enough and - ” She smiles here. “Appreciate it, all right?”
- it’s most of the time, he thinks that she is close enough, just close enough, that he understands that she is waiting. If he goes back over it (and he does a lot) he'll rhyme and reason that he has plenty of things to ask her; was it for him, was it for death, was it for him and death or just that figure, the figure that stood over them and threw all of them into motion.
When Watanuki thinks of Yuuko now, it's often.
He loves luxuries after all.