(no subject)
If I slap you I'm sorry, but I feel like I must to knock some sense into myself.
I got the job at the golf course with Laura, I started on monday actually but I just haven't had time to post anything. I have to be up by 4:40 or so to get over the Academy in time for the gate to open at 5:30 so I can get in and go to work. It's easy, manual labor, no customers, and I like watching the sun rise.
Nothing to complain about really.
Laura recently decided it's time to move out.
Just as I was deciding that I wanted to stay home.
I hate to say it, but if Laura jumped off a bridge I would follow for better or worse. If she dies, I may as well die too... So even though I'm not really in the mood to move out right now I've decided to anyway.
Nathan still is being kinda whimsical, and I'm not going to wait for him to make up his mind anymore about having me as a roomie. It's not worth my patience, and honestly I need to cut him from my life. He's become a festering sickness, and I worry that if I don't cure this soon I'll end up having to chop myself up. I keep telling myself, reminding myself, repeating to myself all the reasons why I need to cut him out.
Yet I love him, like I think I would love a brother if I'd ever had one.
I love living beneath this vast mountain and looking up every morning and reminding myself how small and unimportant I am. No matter the choices I make. I am safe in my irrelevance.
I got the job at the golf course with Laura, I started on monday actually but I just haven't had time to post anything. I have to be up by 4:40 or so to get over the Academy in time for the gate to open at 5:30 so I can get in and go to work. It's easy, manual labor, no customers, and I like watching the sun rise.
Nothing to complain about really.
Laura recently decided it's time to move out.
Just as I was deciding that I wanted to stay home.
I hate to say it, but if Laura jumped off a bridge I would follow for better or worse. If she dies, I may as well die too... So even though I'm not really in the mood to move out right now I've decided to anyway.
Nathan still is being kinda whimsical, and I'm not going to wait for him to make up his mind anymore about having me as a roomie. It's not worth my patience, and honestly I need to cut him from my life. He's become a festering sickness, and I worry that if I don't cure this soon I'll end up having to chop myself up. I keep telling myself, reminding myself, repeating to myself all the reasons why I need to cut him out.
Yet I love him, like I think I would love a brother if I'd ever had one.
I love living beneath this vast mountain and looking up every morning and reminding myself how small and unimportant I am. No matter the choices I make. I am safe in my irrelevance.