ms piggy doesnt love you anymore. sorry.
yeah. today was the last day of school. it was nice. i think i did pretty good on my finals.which is good cause my mom said she'll pay me 10 dollars for every A i get. awesome.
i was thinking alot today on the way home from school. tina is going on vacation with lauren like next week and she failed to tell me that. " 9 dayss til relief with the bffff
<33 laurenn =)" from her profile. thats how i find out. its cool i must say. its FUCKING AWESOME. YAY!!! fuck it eh.
i hate the person i've become. i want to change so badly but i dont know how to. i've realized i have no friends. i have mike thats it. and t4c but no best friend. im surrounded by fakes. fake friends. no one really knows me. no one really knows anything about me. i can call t4c my "best friends" but really ive only known them not even a year and they know hardly anything about me. we hardly hang out. and i dunno. i guess im fine on my own. i have mike. but i know that wont last forever. i can hope and wish that it will but the chances of it really happening are slim to none. tina is just gone. honestly there is nothing but hostility between us. nothing but tension because of all the things we want to say but dont. im not miserable but im not completely happy. i just cant stop wondering why people hate me so much and how i turned out this was. because last year i had so many friends. i had a best friend. i was happy despite all the shit i went thru with jeremy. he changed me. he turned me into this scared girl. this person who doesnt know how to have fun anymore cuase all she worries about is preventing getting hurt. i want to change. but i dont know where to start. its so hard. i wish someone could just tell me how to fix my life. and then i could do it. but its not that easy.not at all. i dont want to accept the fact that i am who i am. so if i dont accept it how am i going to change it. i mean im trying to change somethings. like my stupidity and the way i get mad over stupid things and how i dont explain things when i say them and i dont do drugs or drink or smoke anymore. i dont talk to jeremy anymore. things are better. but im not the person i want to be. not yet at least. its so frusterating. its even more frusterating that i have no one to talk to about this stuff.
my mom is fucking pissing me the hell off. shes fucking annoying as shit. and everything EVERYTHING is about my sister. he stupid hand. how great she is. how much shes achieved. gosh. i cant handle it.
but enough ranting mike is here and were leaving for the beach with ltal and people. more later.
♥ km
i was thinking alot today on the way home from school. tina is going on vacation with lauren like next week and she failed to tell me that. " 9 dayss til relief with the bffff
<33 laurenn =)" from her profile. thats how i find out. its cool i must say. its FUCKING AWESOME. YAY!!! fuck it eh.
i hate the person i've become. i want to change so badly but i dont know how to. i've realized i have no friends. i have mike thats it. and t4c but no best friend. im surrounded by fakes. fake friends. no one really knows me. no one really knows anything about me. i can call t4c my "best friends" but really ive only known them not even a year and they know hardly anything about me. we hardly hang out. and i dunno. i guess im fine on my own. i have mike. but i know that wont last forever. i can hope and wish that it will but the chances of it really happening are slim to none. tina is just gone. honestly there is nothing but hostility between us. nothing but tension because of all the things we want to say but dont. im not miserable but im not completely happy. i just cant stop wondering why people hate me so much and how i turned out this was. because last year i had so many friends. i had a best friend. i was happy despite all the shit i went thru with jeremy. he changed me. he turned me into this scared girl. this person who doesnt know how to have fun anymore cuase all she worries about is preventing getting hurt. i want to change. but i dont know where to start. its so hard. i wish someone could just tell me how to fix my life. and then i could do it. but its not that easy.not at all. i dont want to accept the fact that i am who i am. so if i dont accept it how am i going to change it. i mean im trying to change somethings. like my stupidity and the way i get mad over stupid things and how i dont explain things when i say them and i dont do drugs or drink or smoke anymore. i dont talk to jeremy anymore. things are better. but im not the person i want to be. not yet at least. its so frusterating. its even more frusterating that i have no one to talk to about this stuff.
my mom is fucking pissing me the hell off. shes fucking annoying as shit. and everything EVERYTHING is about my sister. he stupid hand. how great she is. how much shes achieved. gosh. i cant handle it.
but enough ranting mike is here and were leaving for the beach with ltal and people. more later.
♥ km