arrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhh
today, january fourth, my life was ruined even further than already inflicted
for today, january fourth, nathan was kissing the girl on the stairway at the end of the day
shit son'
cytnhia was a doll and waited for me through the horrors of the overdreaded and underappreciated 'sew what' club
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww these keys are nasty and greasy cuz im at the library
and theyre loud
cynthia and i were unable to deface the school property in the form of a much loved and much abused ceiling tile in a certain hallway, but were thankfully able to compensate this loss in the vandalization of a newfound and previously destroyed bulletin board on the second floor. not only did i write, rewrite, and write again 'nathan' with various phrases following, but we disposed of our evidence (a short black pen which we found on the window sill) by tossing it out the window onto the roof, which we were afraid to step out onto for fear that we'd get the inspiration to jump off onto the ground below.
o god thats life
and life sucks ass terribly, my friends
because i know what lou said about me. and i know i deserve more respect than being called a bitch when hes the one making a big deal out of this shit which im trying SO HARD to forget....SO HARD to push to the furthest darkest corner of my mind and just FORGET IT. i couldnt believe he didnt talk to me. just like in the movies. funny how my life could ever relate to a movie, or anything thats been seen before for that matter.
yay i think cynthias coming over now. pizza for dinner. celebrating the occasion that my mom just got a nursing job @ good sam that shes been DYING and working so hard to get. i wish my life could be like that. a little hard work and ambition, getting me where i want to be. i wish nathan could be like that. a couple of math problems, a nobel piece prize here or there, and a touch of hope and i could have the man ive been pining and obsessing over like some kind of.......obsessive, pining freak or something ::shrugs::
sigh
grrr
hmmmmm
ugh
nmmmhhhhhhh
hui'
arghem
sigh
hmmmmmmm
uh
hup
yeieiei
but in the meantime
i brought my phone in today and we went camera-happy, laura and cynthia and me
we took pictures (not good ones, but pictures all the same) of larry and key eye joe, and kevin, and i got a GREAT jail mug shot of brad two seconds after i walked into school this morning. you see, after that shot i had predicted my day would be a good one, but fuck was i wrong.
i LOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEE YYYYYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
i'll tell him god dammit
WWWAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTT NNNNNNNAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAANNN
some day. hell yea
::recieves sudden inspiration for song/poem/piece of literature romantically dedicated to nathan
this morning laura showed me how to write pi with his initials and that made my......five seconds. because the day was crap. but that wasnt. so it made some sort of time.
HO SHIT SON i crashed head-on into nathan on the magical stairway. he never watches where hes going. he wore axe. i almost couldnt resist wrapping my arms around him and sinking my head into his chest and capturing the moment and telling him i love him. but whatever.
bye love
you are gone
no chance in world
you are gone
love hurts
but you dont
you do things
that he wont
shit bye love
good knwing you
cause i loved you
love never leaves
only
tears
throbbing heart
shredding apart
crocodile tears
a thousand beers
save me
damn you
save me
damn you love
i love you but hate the love
i hate the love
can i keep you
forever
keep the lips together
stay right here
in your arms
keep me from harm
im not leaving
fuck love
a shove
and im gone
bye
but you
are not
ch-whatever
psshhhh i gotta go do something to distract me from nathan
p.s. cynthia:breaking into school as ninjas
locker running
peanut butter and jelly bush
shit son that mine? fuck.
"....okay....number one:...............SHIT!"
_-P A P A B E A R-_
for today, january fourth, nathan was kissing the girl on the stairway at the end of the day
shit son'
cytnhia was a doll and waited for me through the horrors of the overdreaded and underappreciated 'sew what' club
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww these keys are nasty and greasy cuz im at the library
and theyre loud
cynthia and i were unable to deface the school property in the form of a much loved and much abused ceiling tile in a certain hallway, but were thankfully able to compensate this loss in the vandalization of a newfound and previously destroyed bulletin board on the second floor. not only did i write, rewrite, and write again 'nathan' with various phrases following, but we disposed of our evidence (a short black pen which we found on the window sill) by tossing it out the window onto the roof, which we were afraid to step out onto for fear that we'd get the inspiration to jump off onto the ground below.
o god thats life
and life sucks ass terribly, my friends
because i know what lou said about me. and i know i deserve more respect than being called a bitch when hes the one making a big deal out of this shit which im trying SO HARD to forget....SO HARD to push to the furthest darkest corner of my mind and just FORGET IT. i couldnt believe he didnt talk to me. just like in the movies. funny how my life could ever relate to a movie, or anything thats been seen before for that matter.
yay i think cynthias coming over now. pizza for dinner. celebrating the occasion that my mom just got a nursing job @ good sam that shes been DYING and working so hard to get. i wish my life could be like that. a little hard work and ambition, getting me where i want to be. i wish nathan could be like that. a couple of math problems, a nobel piece prize here or there, and a touch of hope and i could have the man ive been pining and obsessing over like some kind of.......obsessive, pining freak or something ::shrugs::
sigh
grrr
hmmmmm
ugh
nmmmhhhhhhh
hui'
arghem
sigh
hmmmmmmm
uh
hup
yeieiei
but in the meantime
i brought my phone in today and we went camera-happy, laura and cynthia and me
we took pictures (not good ones, but pictures all the same) of larry and key eye joe, and kevin, and i got a GREAT jail mug shot of brad two seconds after i walked into school this morning. you see, after that shot i had predicted my day would be a good one, but fuck was i wrong.
i LOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEE YYYYYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
i'll tell him god dammit
WWWAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTT NNNNNNNAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAANNN
some day. hell yea
::recieves sudden inspiration for song/poem/piece of literature romantically dedicated to nathan
this morning laura showed me how to write pi with his initials and that made my......five seconds. because the day was crap. but that wasnt. so it made some sort of time.
HO SHIT SON i crashed head-on into nathan on the magical stairway. he never watches where hes going. he wore axe. i almost couldnt resist wrapping my arms around him and sinking my head into his chest and capturing the moment and telling him i love him. but whatever.
bye love
you are gone
no chance in world
you are gone
love hurts
but you dont
you do things
that he wont
shit bye love
good knwing you
cause i loved you
love never leaves
only
tears
throbbing heart
shredding apart
crocodile tears
a thousand beers
save me
damn you
save me
damn you love
i love you but hate the love
i hate the love
can i keep you
forever
keep the lips together
stay right here
in your arms
keep me from harm
im not leaving
fuck love
a shove
and im gone
bye
but you
are not
ch-whatever
psshhhh i gotta go do something to distract me from nathan
p.s. cynthia:breaking into school as ninjas
locker running
peanut butter and jelly bush
shit son that mine? fuck.
"....okay....number one:...............SHIT!"
_-P A P A B E A R-_