(no subject)
You, and you, and you. Fucked me up pretty bad. One after the other after the other, with perfect timing like you planned it, you take her when I'm done fucking her over and fuck her over some more. And I can hardly remember it. From age 16 to 22, everything is snapshots of shitty memories. Those were supposed to be the best years of my life, and it's all a blur. And I still feel the emotion of it all, emotion with no substance to back it up, because I've blocked it out. I try to remember, and it puts me into this depression that takes days to get out of, and I don't know why I want to remember so bad, but I think it would be better than not remembering at all why I feel the way I do, why certain things set me off for no reason. It's driving me crazy. And now I've got her, who is too good and too innocent and too kind, and I feel like I push her away when I try, I feel like she wonders why I can't let it go. You three are still affecting my life, ten years later.