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ok so.
i try very hard to not be judgemental of people. however i'm trying to find communities to join and make friends, and i keep on coming across communities that are PRO eating disorder. like.. presuming that these girls in these communities are still sick.. and their minds are still fucked up. but oh my Lord it makes me sad + angry. i want to ( Read more... )
I was 360 pounds at my largest. I have since had a gastric bypass, which has -forced- me to stop some of my compulsive eating habits. But hasn't curbed the mental aspect of it at all. And I still...eat, all day. Just not as much. Because I -can't-. I am really greatful they qualified me for the surgery because I'd never have been near a healthy weight. And now that I'm older and better understand my unhealthy eating habits and practices and thoughts, I can do better to try to treat them differently, and I know not to pass them on to my child. Hopefully anyways.
I've found that a good way to keep from eating,is to eat ice. I'm addicted to eating ice. I don't recommend chewing it, as it's bad for your teeth but boy do I love the crunchiness. But I feel better about eating ice then I do anything else (Outside of normal meals of course.) And it keeps me better hydrated. You could also try chewing gum or something too so that your mouth is occupied during more of the day so you don't want to drink as much pop.
It sounds like you did good this day though. It's ok to snack. Binging is FAR from snacking and... I can eat everything in the kitchen if given the chance (I hate days where I'm stuck in the house for this reason.)
Your so positive it's inspiring. I think if no one is in a good place to be a sponsor sort of person (I don't think I'm in the healthiest place for such as I get a little....obsessed/crazy over losing weight/keeping it off, when I'm not pregnant and go a little too far the other way when I -am- pregnant to offer.) But maybe leaving an entry about what you ate or didn't eat day to day would help you, because someone KNOWS then, and I will be reading for sure. :)
In my state at least, the state medical programs, will pay a portion of your enrollment fee for a gym. Or the gym it's self will give you a Medica or Ucare discount of a certain percent. If you really are interested you should look into seeing if your state has something like that. And sitting in the sauna for a few hours done safely isn't necessarily an anorexic thought/idea. My boyfriend is pretty into fitness in a very healthy manor (He's into martial arts and grappling and MMA and things like that. I tell him he should be a personal trainer or open a gym or something and train fighters. He's a lil too out of shape to fight himself or anything anymore.) and he is native american and he firmly believes in the benefits of sweating it out for some amount of time. I donno what is safe and smart though. But I know well hydrated a person can sweat for more then an hour. Like the native american sweat lodges. They chill in those things for like...days sometimes.
And I just wanted to let you know I really enjoy reading your entries already. Your a really cool girl and I love the way you write. (I'm a fan of words, they're my favorite thing in the whole world I think.)
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