I'm Ready to Bingo [Oneshot]
Title : I'm Ready to Bingp
Fandom : Super Junior
Pairing : Eunhae
Raiting : PG
Genre : Romance, Crack, AU
Words : 1797
Summary : In which Donghae is sexy, free, single and ready to bingo, Eunhyuk jabs people, and dogs, with knitting needles, Siwon reads out numbers and they're all in their 60s.
A/N - I couldn't help myself :)
Donghae straightened his glasses on the bridge of his nose, if he was going to go ahead with this plan he might as well put in the effort. His glasses had always been his favourite accessory, ever since he bought them two decades ago. The glasses accentuated his eyes, his best feature in his opinion, and increased his sex appeal consequently. A lot of people have said they make him look strange, actually everyone but him does, they even tell him so. Donghae doesn't seem to realise that rather than accentuating his eyes, the thick lenses magnify his eyes to a disconcerting and often terrifying size. Little children have nightmares about the large eyes the accidentally caught as they walked down the road. Donghae, as per usual, is none the wiser. His plan looked like it was going to fail before it ever started.
He tucked his checked shit into his trouser, tightened his belt to secure it, and used his clothing roller to remove any remaining cat hair from his five cats that he might have missed. He was ready. Eyes flicked to the mirror once more as he did a last once over before walking over to the door to leave. Flopsy, Mopsy, Cottontail and Peter watched in a line, meowing is disapproval - it was rare that they were left home alone. Bob slept in the corner; his paw swatted the air as he rolled over.
Donghae regretted his decision the moment he arrived at his destination. The room was filled with about a hundred old ladies, each was glaring at the others with an air of mistrust and he saw a few jabbing others with their knitting needles. Donghae decided that this would be last time he followed the advice of his best, and only, friend Siwon, and takes inspiration from a random pop song he heard on the radio when he couldn't figure out how to change the station in his new car. Technology is overly complicated these days. The song by this 'idol group' person awakened an absurd idea in his frustrated mind, in particular the line - 'Sexy, free and single, I'm ready to bingo.' he couldn't understand why twenty year old gorgeous boys would go to bingo when they're sexy, free and single, but that problem doesn't apply to Donghae. He had assumed he'd find plenty of potential lovers in his own age group at such a gathering. Now he realises he was wrong. He had no hope with a room filled with old women, a heightened sense of competitiveness, and only two men. One of those men was Siwon who was reading the numbers that all in the room listened to so avidly. The other man seemed even more engrossed in the game than any of the women in the room; he'd stolen one of his neighbour’s knitting needles and was jabbing all that was in reach. That terrier never saw it coming. In that moment Donghae decided that he'd never again listen to 'modern' music again. He'd stick to Trot. But now that he's here he decided he might as well make the most of the 'opportunity.'
The seat next the other male was the only empty seat in the hall. Donghae wasn't sure whether to be glad or scared; it seems the seat had been vacated due to fear of its neighbour and his rather pointy weapon. Donghae sat down tentatively. He was glad when he didn't feel the pain of a knitting needle being stuck in his waist. He looked at the male, he gaze was met quizzically. The male wasn't conventionally good looking, but his wide eyes and strong jaw line all drew in Donghae's attention, as did his slim frame. The male had an overbearing sensual aura emanating from his every pore that drowned Donghae as he sat down - he seemed to be the only one who noticed it though, everyone else just looked at the other male with obvious disdain. He saw no wedding ring adorning the fourth finger of his left hand. Maybe bingo hadn't been such a bad idea after all.
The male was still staring at him, though now dubiously. Had he taken the seat of someone who had merely gone to the bathroom?
"Why are you sitting down if you arrived too late to play?"
Donghae just stared. He saw the point; he too would find it odd if he was in the other male’s position. Now would be the time to abandon the plan and head home the comfort of his five cats, he decided.
"Sorry." He started standing up, but he was pushed back into his seat.
"You don't have to leave," the male looked down at his lap awkwardly before his face erupted in a smile, "Here help me check if my numbers come up, my hearings not what it used to be. I'm Eunhyuk by the way."
"Donghae."
His reply came out more like a grunt than a distinctive word. He had been taken aback by the dazzling smile directed his way; he had not expected such a welcome after seeing the actions he had observed from across the room. The women on the table seemed perturbed by his newfound behaviour too. Perhaps Eunhyuk, like himself, did not hold women in such a desirable light as did the majority of males worldwide. Donghae was starting too really like bingo. He liked it even more when Eunhyuk scooted over so that their arms and legs were flush against each other. He might have only done so in order to allow Donghae to see his numbers better, but Donghae liked to read it as something more. Donghae deciphered it as Eunhyuk sharing the same interest in him that he did in Eunhyuk. His smile was inevitable.
He threw himself into bingo wholeheartedly; he couldn't disappoint the person he was wooing could he? As he did so he discovered why all these women came weekly to take part in an activity they had a small chance of winning. The winnings weren't large, the company wasn't thrilling (for Donghae it was, but not for the women), and the music was distasteful, but the thrilling anxiety and expectation that accompanied hearing your numbers being called out was intoxicating. Eunhyuk only needed one more number, 20, for him to be the lucky one taking home the jackpot that night. Both of them were on the edge of their seats for every number that Siwon read out, drumming their fingers in fear someone would win before the necessary number was read out. Siwon saw them and purposefully drew it out. He just wanted to spite Donghae, he knew it.
Siwon took a deep breath, "The next number is 20!" The number echoed through the room and was met with numerous grunts of displeasure. Eunhyuk and Donghae froze.
"I WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!" He jumped up from his seat like a manic five year old child. Donghae just stared at him in disbelief. Eunhyuk turned to him and shook his shoulders violently.
"I never win! Never, never, never, never, ever, and I come every week!"
Donghae was certain he heard him squeal in delight as he headed off to collect his winnings of 50,000 won. The mass of disgruntled aged women around him slowly picked up their handbags, pets, and in one case their denchers, and made their way to leave. Some glared at Donghae as they passed. He just smiled back apologetically. Siwon spoke to him before he too left, a knowing smile played across his lips. It pissed Donghae off.
"I see you enjoyed bingo then." He didn't even bother to phrase it like a question. His demeanour irked Donghae to no end. His right eyebrow twitched slightly, but if he wanted Siwon to leave by the time Eunhyuk returned he'd have to comply to Siwon's teasing.
"Obviously."
Siwon chuckled on his way out.
Eunhyuk returned a minute or so later still overflowing with pure glee. Though once he noticed Donghae's presence, his euphoric smile morphed into one of mistrust. Donghae was struck with pure fear; had he been misreading Eunhyuk's so called advances all night? Was he meant to have left the moment the game ended? His mind was so overrun with similar questions that he was left tongue tied. His silence seemed to worry Eunhyuk.
"...I'm not sharing my winnings."
Relief washed over Donghae, maybe hope was not lost after all. He couldn’t help but start laughing manically, no matter how unattractive it looked. Maybe his plan would actually come to fruition in the end, the thought pleased him exceptionally. However Eunhyuk's next words completely erased all positivity within Donghae's overactive mind.
"They're for me and Hyeri only." Eunhyuk sounded protective of this Hyeri. Donghae had been reading all the signs wrong, especially the most important one; Eunhyuk was not gay, like him. Eunhyuk was married, and probably had a pleasant married life with his aged yet still amazingly beautiful wife Hyeri. Donghae's laughter died instantly. Eunhyuk noticed.
"Hyeri's my cat." Eunhyuk gazed demurely at Donghae. Donghae's brain just shut off, it had worked too hard in the past few minutes. He said all that his fragmented mind could muster. He wished it had been unable to muster anything once the words passed from his lips.
"I have five cats, beat you." His words were monotonous.
Donghae wondered if Eunhyuk would ever stop laughing. He did, maybe five of ten years later - At least that's what it felt like to Donghae.
"Really? Maybe you should come over and meet Hyeri, seeing as you like 'cats' so much." His tone perfectly blended the suggestive and condescending nature of his words, Donghae swallowed in anticipation of what it entailed.
Donghae nodded, his brain was still somewhere that eluded him. Eunhyuk smiled and started to leave, his hand moving to wave. Then he stopped, fluidly turned on the spot, strode right up to Donghae, leant down and pecked Donghae on the lips.
Donghae nodded again. Eunhyuk laughed for what seemed like the millionth time. Donghae telepathically yelled for his brain to return to him so he could not look idiotic in front of the object of his desire, he was acting like a teenage girl. His calls sadly weren't answered.
As Eunhyuk skipped out jovially he called back to the still frozen Donghae, "Come to bingo next week, you're my lucky charm!"
The wink Eunhyuk sent him seemed to revive one small part of Donghae's brain as a single thought rose in the vast nothingness his mind now emulated; he really like bingo, therefore he should definitely return next week, the week after, and maybe every single week that follows.
Eunhyuk was just the added bonus. Donghae had always found bonuses to be exceptionally motivational.
Fandom : Super Junior
Pairing : Eunhae
Raiting : PG
Genre : Romance, Crack, AU
Words : 1797
Summary : In which Donghae is sexy, free, single and ready to bingo, Eunhyuk jabs people, and dogs, with knitting needles, Siwon reads out numbers and they're all in their 60s.
A/N - I couldn't help myself :)
Donghae straightened his glasses on the bridge of his nose, if he was going to go ahead with this plan he might as well put in the effort. His glasses had always been his favourite accessory, ever since he bought them two decades ago. The glasses accentuated his eyes, his best feature in his opinion, and increased his sex appeal consequently. A lot of people have said they make him look strange, actually everyone but him does, they even tell him so. Donghae doesn't seem to realise that rather than accentuating his eyes, the thick lenses magnify his eyes to a disconcerting and often terrifying size. Little children have nightmares about the large eyes the accidentally caught as they walked down the road. Donghae, as per usual, is none the wiser. His plan looked like it was going to fail before it ever started.
He tucked his checked shit into his trouser, tightened his belt to secure it, and used his clothing roller to remove any remaining cat hair from his five cats that he might have missed. He was ready. Eyes flicked to the mirror once more as he did a last once over before walking over to the door to leave. Flopsy, Mopsy, Cottontail and Peter watched in a line, meowing is disapproval - it was rare that they were left home alone. Bob slept in the corner; his paw swatted the air as he rolled over.
Donghae regretted his decision the moment he arrived at his destination. The room was filled with about a hundred old ladies, each was glaring at the others with an air of mistrust and he saw a few jabbing others with their knitting needles. Donghae decided that this would be last time he followed the advice of his best, and only, friend Siwon, and takes inspiration from a random pop song he heard on the radio when he couldn't figure out how to change the station in his new car. Technology is overly complicated these days. The song by this 'idol group' person awakened an absurd idea in his frustrated mind, in particular the line - 'Sexy, free and single, I'm ready to bingo.' he couldn't understand why twenty year old gorgeous boys would go to bingo when they're sexy, free and single, but that problem doesn't apply to Donghae. He had assumed he'd find plenty of potential lovers in his own age group at such a gathering. Now he realises he was wrong. He had no hope with a room filled with old women, a heightened sense of competitiveness, and only two men. One of those men was Siwon who was reading the numbers that all in the room listened to so avidly. The other man seemed even more engrossed in the game than any of the women in the room; he'd stolen one of his neighbour’s knitting needles and was jabbing all that was in reach. That terrier never saw it coming. In that moment Donghae decided that he'd never again listen to 'modern' music again. He'd stick to Trot. But now that he's here he decided he might as well make the most of the 'opportunity.'
The seat next the other male was the only empty seat in the hall. Donghae wasn't sure whether to be glad or scared; it seems the seat had been vacated due to fear of its neighbour and his rather pointy weapon. Donghae sat down tentatively. He was glad when he didn't feel the pain of a knitting needle being stuck in his waist. He looked at the male, he gaze was met quizzically. The male wasn't conventionally good looking, but his wide eyes and strong jaw line all drew in Donghae's attention, as did his slim frame. The male had an overbearing sensual aura emanating from his every pore that drowned Donghae as he sat down - he seemed to be the only one who noticed it though, everyone else just looked at the other male with obvious disdain. He saw no wedding ring adorning the fourth finger of his left hand. Maybe bingo hadn't been such a bad idea after all.
The male was still staring at him, though now dubiously. Had he taken the seat of someone who had merely gone to the bathroom?
"Why are you sitting down if you arrived too late to play?"
Donghae just stared. He saw the point; he too would find it odd if he was in the other male’s position. Now would be the time to abandon the plan and head home the comfort of his five cats, he decided.
"Sorry." He started standing up, but he was pushed back into his seat.
"You don't have to leave," the male looked down at his lap awkwardly before his face erupted in a smile, "Here help me check if my numbers come up, my hearings not what it used to be. I'm Eunhyuk by the way."
"Donghae."
His reply came out more like a grunt than a distinctive word. He had been taken aback by the dazzling smile directed his way; he had not expected such a welcome after seeing the actions he had observed from across the room. The women on the table seemed perturbed by his newfound behaviour too. Perhaps Eunhyuk, like himself, did not hold women in such a desirable light as did the majority of males worldwide. Donghae was starting too really like bingo. He liked it even more when Eunhyuk scooted over so that their arms and legs were flush against each other. He might have only done so in order to allow Donghae to see his numbers better, but Donghae liked to read it as something more. Donghae deciphered it as Eunhyuk sharing the same interest in him that he did in Eunhyuk. His smile was inevitable.
He threw himself into bingo wholeheartedly; he couldn't disappoint the person he was wooing could he? As he did so he discovered why all these women came weekly to take part in an activity they had a small chance of winning. The winnings weren't large, the company wasn't thrilling (for Donghae it was, but not for the women), and the music was distasteful, but the thrilling anxiety and expectation that accompanied hearing your numbers being called out was intoxicating. Eunhyuk only needed one more number, 20, for him to be the lucky one taking home the jackpot that night. Both of them were on the edge of their seats for every number that Siwon read out, drumming their fingers in fear someone would win before the necessary number was read out. Siwon saw them and purposefully drew it out. He just wanted to spite Donghae, he knew it.
Siwon took a deep breath, "The next number is 20!" The number echoed through the room and was met with numerous grunts of displeasure. Eunhyuk and Donghae froze.
"I WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!" He jumped up from his seat like a manic five year old child. Donghae just stared at him in disbelief. Eunhyuk turned to him and shook his shoulders violently.
"I never win! Never, never, never, never, ever, and I come every week!"
Donghae was certain he heard him squeal in delight as he headed off to collect his winnings of 50,000 won. The mass of disgruntled aged women around him slowly picked up their handbags, pets, and in one case their denchers, and made their way to leave. Some glared at Donghae as they passed. He just smiled back apologetically. Siwon spoke to him before he too left, a knowing smile played across his lips. It pissed Donghae off.
"I see you enjoyed bingo then." He didn't even bother to phrase it like a question. His demeanour irked Donghae to no end. His right eyebrow twitched slightly, but if he wanted Siwon to leave by the time Eunhyuk returned he'd have to comply to Siwon's teasing.
"Obviously."
Siwon chuckled on his way out.
Eunhyuk returned a minute or so later still overflowing with pure glee. Though once he noticed Donghae's presence, his euphoric smile morphed into one of mistrust. Donghae was struck with pure fear; had he been misreading Eunhyuk's so called advances all night? Was he meant to have left the moment the game ended? His mind was so overrun with similar questions that he was left tongue tied. His silence seemed to worry Eunhyuk.
"...I'm not sharing my winnings."
Relief washed over Donghae, maybe hope was not lost after all. He couldn’t help but start laughing manically, no matter how unattractive it looked. Maybe his plan would actually come to fruition in the end, the thought pleased him exceptionally. However Eunhyuk's next words completely erased all positivity within Donghae's overactive mind.
"They're for me and Hyeri only." Eunhyuk sounded protective of this Hyeri. Donghae had been reading all the signs wrong, especially the most important one; Eunhyuk was not gay, like him. Eunhyuk was married, and probably had a pleasant married life with his aged yet still amazingly beautiful wife Hyeri. Donghae's laughter died instantly. Eunhyuk noticed.
"Hyeri's my cat." Eunhyuk gazed demurely at Donghae. Donghae's brain just shut off, it had worked too hard in the past few minutes. He said all that his fragmented mind could muster. He wished it had been unable to muster anything once the words passed from his lips.
"I have five cats, beat you." His words were monotonous.
Donghae wondered if Eunhyuk would ever stop laughing. He did, maybe five of ten years later - At least that's what it felt like to Donghae.
"Really? Maybe you should come over and meet Hyeri, seeing as you like 'cats' so much." His tone perfectly blended the suggestive and condescending nature of his words, Donghae swallowed in anticipation of what it entailed.
Donghae nodded, his brain was still somewhere that eluded him. Eunhyuk smiled and started to leave, his hand moving to wave. Then he stopped, fluidly turned on the spot, strode right up to Donghae, leant down and pecked Donghae on the lips.
Donghae nodded again. Eunhyuk laughed for what seemed like the millionth time. Donghae telepathically yelled for his brain to return to him so he could not look idiotic in front of the object of his desire, he was acting like a teenage girl. His calls sadly weren't answered.
As Eunhyuk skipped out jovially he called back to the still frozen Donghae, "Come to bingo next week, you're my lucky charm!"
The wink Eunhyuk sent him seemed to revive one small part of Donghae's brain as a single thought rose in the vast nothingness his mind now emulated; he really like bingo, therefore he should definitely return next week, the week after, and maybe every single week that follows.
Eunhyuk was just the added bonus. Donghae had always found bonuses to be exceptionally motivational.