(no subject)
First and foremost I'd like to tell you that you've changed my life forever. Before I met you I never knew exactly how close to perfect someone could be. You always knew how to make me smile, even in the worst situations. You were so silly, but I loved that about you. I love how you can attempt to be so serious at times, and then just have to tell a joke somewhere in that. It's just you. You always do that to me and I love it. I love it because I can be so mad at you and then you take the situation so serious and then can't help it, it's like you have to say something that makes me crack up and forget why I was ever mad at you to begin with. Do to impossible circumstances we never really got a shot to try and be an "us". Being I'm moving to Maine, that just makes it one hundred times more less likely for us to be able to ever be together. You're so happy, and I'll admit this only because it's you, it sometimes makes me want to break down and cry. We're both in love. There's a problem with that though. I'm completely in love with you. And you, you feel the same, just not about me. You're in love with someone else. And I want to be happy for you so much. Actually, some parts of me are happy for you, but others just break down because deep down I wish I could make you happy. I remember late one night, we were talking on the phone and you told me you got a haircut and you hated it because you thought it was too short. I simply laughed and told you it was probably perfect. You made that little noise you make when you're not sure what to say. I love when you do that. For some reason it just gets to me and I love how it gets to me. I love how you get to me. I love how you get me so easily and the fact that I can tell you anything in the entire world. Anything but how I love you of course. I remember we kissed one night and we both said that it was a mistake. Truthfully, that was the best mistake I've ever made. You have no idea as to how that made me feel inside. You're an amazing girl inside and outside and I don't know how I'm going to survive without you when I move to Maine. I know I'll have to move on at some point. But you'll always be the first girl I ever loved, and I'll never forget you. Even if we part and never talk anymore, I'll still have all of the pictures and the memories to keep our hearts connected, because they will always be connected.