MAN-EATING PLACENTA!
Went to the doc today.
She said my placenta is at the bottom.
I said, ok. So what does that mean for me?
Well, if it doesn't move... C-section!
MOVE THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY PLACENTA. YOU'RE BLOCKING THE WAY TO EARTHLAND!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Actually. This doesn't worry me. I just have a feeling it'll move.
I think it's just hogging all the food so it's really really heavy and lazy. So... once it starts letting me or the baby have some, it'll float right up!
But I'll get an extra sono to make sure it's behaving.
I guess if it doesn't move, I'll just have to draw a detour map for her. Alert the police a couple weeks before so they can direct traffic.
Oh, and I gained ONE pound. one pound... c'mon! I feel like I've grown more in this past month than ever! So this makes 10 lbs so far in six months. But really... overall, the doc said ideally I should only gain 20 -25 lbs total. So seems like I'm on the right track. I think the snacking ... (or grazing as they call it) actually works out better than just sitting down three times and eating huge amounts of food. I mean, I get that dizzy shaky feeling like I'm gonna pass out if I don't constantly eat anyway. So.. And my grazing involves a lot of fruit between meals so... I suppose that's better than doritos. And I don't consider ice cream or rice pudding a bad snack at night coz... it's dairy! ha... and I learned in 3rd grade that that was a necessary food group.
But the cooks at my night job keep calling me "gordita". ha... coz they say all I do is eat while I'm working. I almost feel like I should go hide with my food... like I'm doing something bad! They pull the tray of french fries away from me like I have a problem! But one night recently we were so busy I didn't have time to snack at all. So when I got a free five minutes, I literally shoved anything I could find into my mouth because I really thought I was gonna pass out. All I kept thinking was, "please don't faint, please don't faint." Oh, that would've been horrible. I felt like Julia Roberts, trying to hold my glass of OJ with my shakey hands... "Don't talk about me like I'm not here..." ha ha... love that movie...
So i chugged the OJ, had a dish of rice pudding, some cinnamon bread, a cup of soup... and a piece of toast. ha... I really don't know what stops that feeling, but I think OJ usually does the best. But the looks I got from the cooks. I said, "no... really. I'm gonna pass out! I'm not just a really big pig right now!" ha ha ha...